More Than Friends
by Alsper
Summary: Jasper is coming back home after five years away hoping he can mend old friendships, but when his past comes back to haunt him will he run away again? AH/AU/OOC J/A
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: ****All copyrights, trademarked items, or recognizable characters, plots, etc. mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization.**

**K: Okay time to get out of the angst and teenage over ridden hormones. Well shit who am I kidding you'll find that here, just in smaller doses ;) Promise. New story means new things, like posting with the blog! Srsly go to http:// morethanfriendsbyalsper. Blogspot. Com (take out the spaces) to see some cool stuff!**

**Robs: Well, here it is, the long awaited More Than Friends... just in case y'all were wondering we've been working on parts of this for more than a year! Also I'd like to dedicate this to Sara (musicalsara), 'cause she wanted this fic more than any other, she supported it and encouraged us.**

**Thanks to our amazing beta Amber... who loves this fic... and keeps begging for more like the addict she is.**

**Enough Chit Chat, go read!**

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**JPOV:**

I stood in the terminal waiting for them to start the boarding calls for my flight. You would think I'd be excited about going to see my old friends and my sister. Hell, you'd think maybe I'd be upset about leaving my girlfriend behind while I was gone. But I wasn't.

If anything, I was scared shitless about going back to Forks. I had to face the wrath of my sister, which is very fitting considering I didn't even make it home for her wedding and yet here I was, waiting to fly back to be the best man for Edward and Bella.

And no, it wasn't my sister's often irrational – although totally expected by this point – hormonal outrage that was scaring me either. Hell, it wasn't even the pre-wedding jitters that had Edward acting like a complete ass during our last couple of phone calls. No, what had me scared shitless at this point was about five foot three, feisty as hell, and truly the only woman who would ever hold my heart.

I chuckled quietly; she was definitely _not_ just some cheap knock-off.

"What's so funny?" A whiny voice asked from beside me.

_Speaking of cheap knock-offs…_ I looked to my left where my girlfriend of the past two years sat, flipping through a magazine.

"Just laughing at memories Kelly, relax would you?"

"You're a shitty liar Whitlock." She snapped. "And I'm calm. Why should I be worried, you're with me now, not her."

I rolled my eyes and looked at my watch. Ever since Kelly found something relating to my past while snooping around, things had changed between us. Instead of being understanding about me trying to leave things in Forks behind me, she brought it up every chance she could. She even went as far as dyeing her naturally blonde hair black, getting a really shitty looking cropped hair cut and dressing like Alice did.

Shit, as if that wasn't crazy enough, she also tried to get me to call her Alice in bed. I won't, and never would, because let's face it; she will never be Alice. If anything, she was just a warm body to keep me company and a constant reminder of what I gave up.

"Jasper," I heard her purr as she wrapped her arms around me. "I'm going to miss you while you're gone." I rolled my eyes again knowing she was only doing it to make me feel guilty.

"I'll be back in a few days Kel, you know that. I've got a job here, it's not like I'm going to drop everything here to stay in Washington."

"Is that all you care about? Your crime scene files?"

I turned to face her. "Yes, 'cause I believe the sick fucks in the world that commit murder need to be found so the victims families can have peace when they bury their loved ones. Isn't that why you wanted to be a detective?"

She opened her mouth to respond, but luckily for me she was cut off by the voice over the loud speaker announcing that my flight was ready to board. "Well Kel, that's me." I said, pulling away from her. She pouted and I knew that look, so I quickly gave her a kiss. "I'll call you when I land," I promised her as I handed my boarding pass over to the gate attendant.

"Stay away from Alice please!" She called out as I walked away. I nodded my head, letting her know I heard her but there was no way in hell I could possibly stay away from Alice. Five years was long enough… And not only that, she was the maid of honor.

_Yeah, I'm pretty much_ _screwed._

After making sure my bag was safely stored in the over head compartment, I got into my seat and stared out the window. In just six short hours I would be back to the one place that held many secrets for me. I had turned my back on the people who loved me when I left. Would they welcome me back? Most importantly, would Alice?

**~*~*~*~April 22****nd**** 2005~*~*~*~**

I had to get out of here, seeing the way she was laughing with her friends… I was just holding her back. I pushed my way past the other students, making my way to the lobby so I could get to my car. _Shit_, I had to let Ed know I was leaving her. _Damn this isn't going to go over well._

I started heading back to the ballroom only to find Alice standing in the lobby, her shoes in one hand and purse in the other, as she smiled at me. She looked so beautiful tonight in the light blue strapless dress that showed off her legs.

I should have known that Alice would find me first. "I have to go." I told her.

She raised her eyebrow at me. "Where? We have a room here NB." She said pointing above the lobby of the hotel.

"No Ali Cat, I have to go."

"Then I am going too." She said as she put her heels back on.

"No, you're staying here this time," I told her, turning to leave. I stopped when her hand grabbed my arm.

She pulled me around to face her. "Who the fuck do you think you are, telling me what to do?"

"Just trust me Mary Alice," I said, shaking my arm free. I started walking towards the main doors. I could hear the click of her heels on the marble floors as she followed behind me. "It's better if you stay here with Ed and Bella okay?"

"Well Jasper Alexander, I don't think so. I'm a grown woman and I can make my own decisions, I'm going with you..." She shot back.

_Damn stubborn woman! _

"God Damn it Alice, for once in the twelve years we've known each other, will you please listen to me! Go back to _your_ prom and have fun. Don't worry about me." I shouted at her as I stepped onto the asphalt of the hotel's parking lot.

"This was supposed to be about us Jasper... you know _our_ prom because you didn't go to yours." I turned to face her, silently cursing the rain. She was ruining that pretty blue dress she was wearing, all because I'm a fucking moron and can't take hurting her. But I'd have to hurt her to make her stay.

I scrubbed my hands over my face thankful that at least the rain could hide any tears that were bound to come from either of us. "Damn it Alice, please don't make me say it..." I warned her.

She shoved me in the chest, causing my hands to drop and me to look at her. "Say what?!" She challenged.

_Please don't make me lie to you Alice._

"If you love me then you'll fucking stay here." _Low blow man, you know she loves you._

"If you loved me you'd let me come along," she retorted. Her face changed from angry determination, to pleading. _Fuck! That's not a good sign_. "Jasper, you promised, everything was gonna be us..." She held up her left hand. The hand that held the promise ring I gave her. "Remember?" She pleaded.

_Damn it she's going to make me lie to her…_

"I lied Alice... I told you what you wanted to hear okay? I'm a bastard. I didn't want to hurt you but I did. So now I'm leaving."

Her eyebrows furrowed as she took a step back. "Jasper... what are you saying?" She asked. I could hear her voice breaking as it started to register in her head.

I clenched the muscles in my jaw, willing myself to stay still, not to take her in my arms and kiss her. To tell her that I can't live without her, no matter what my brain is making me say. "I have to go Alice," I shook my head slightly to get rid of the thoughts of taking her up to our room and showing her how much I really did love her. "I'm... I..." _Fuck, I can't do this!_ I screamed in my head. I turned to leave her and again, her hand yanked at my arm.

"Stop being a coward Jasper, just fucking say it!"

I swallowed back the tears as I turned to face her. "I don't love you Alice and I think you should move on."

I could see the pain and betrayal flash through her eyes as they filled with tears. I could feel the warmth of my own tears mixing with the cold rain against my cheeks. "Asshole," she muttered as she smacked me. "Don't..." She trailed off before running towards the surrounding trees.

"Alice!" I called after her but she was already out of my line of sight. _Fuck!_ Now I need to get Edward to help find her.

This is so not going how I planned. Then again I hadn't planned on lying and hurting Alice or crushing my best friends trust in me either.

_Jesus I'm so screwed_, I thought, groaning as I headed back into the ballroom of the hotel. The music was loud and blaring as couples held each other close dancing. I got several looks from people as my wet sneakers squeaked against the dance floor.

Edward and Bella were easy for me to spot. Bella being the wall flower she is doesn't like to be the center of attention. And Edward, being… well Edward, will do anything to see his girls happy; Rose and Alice included.

I tapped Edward on the shoulder waiting for him to acknowledge me. Bella smiled at me before her smile faltered slightly as my appearance.

_Grey suit, seventy dollars. Matching grey Converse, forty dollars._ _Telling your best friend that you broke his baby sister's heart and your promise to him, priceless. No scratch that, I'll be lucky if I can breathe through my nose again._

Edward turned to smile at me. "Sup man?" he asked.

I rubbed the back of my neck. "I'm sorry man, but uh... Ali and I kind of... and she took off..." I gave him and Bella an apologetic look.

He raised his eyebrow at me. "You guys..." he prodded while giving me his 'don't bullshit me' look."Broke up?"

_Crap that means he knew we were secretly dating_. I started fidgeting with my tie. "We got into a fight and well, like I said, she took off."

Bella sighed and went to the table to get her phone from her purse. "What did you do Jazz?" She asked as she dialed a number on her phone. I just glared at her to shut the fuck up.

"What is going on?" Edward asked as he crossed his arms over his chest. "You looked all cozy and happy earlier."

"Dude, it's pissing rain outside. Do you really want the details when your baby sister is in the cold ass rain somewhere?"

"Edward," Bella interjected, "she's not answering her cell."

Edward snapped his attention back at me. He was clearly pissed. The last time I saw him like this was when Alice was dating someone else. "What. The. Fuck. Did. You. Do?"

"She's better off without me man and you know it."

"After everything that's happened?" he asked, pursing his lips and glaring at me.

Bella stepped in at just the right moment, 'cause I know if Edward doesn't get his answers there will be hell to pay. "Okay, you two knock it off. We need to find Alice." She said. "Edward," her tone softened as she placed her hand on his face and his eyes met hers. "Once we find Alice, you can kick Jasper's ass beyond recognition. I'll even get Emmett in on it." She turned her attention back to me. "You better hope my best friend is okay." She warned.

_Crap._

"I just want to know what the fuck is going on; I swear to fucking god, I will not kick this pencil dick's ass!" Edward snarled.

"Your sister is somewhere out in the rain, crying because I fucking lied to her and broke her heart so she would stay here this time!" I admitted.

"You're leaving? Again?" Edward asked dumbfounded.

I gave him a curt nod. "I'm destroying things Ed."

He shoved past me hard. "I gotta find my baby sister." Bella just glared and ran after Edward.

I turned in their direction. "I'm sorry Ed." _For lying to you both_, I added in my head, hoping he knew what I meant.

He turned towards me, the betrayal clearly written on his face, even in the dimly lit room. "I always hoped you'd be a man of your word Jazz, I guess I was wrong about you," he said before taking Bella's hand and leaving me standing there.

"I guess I'm more like my father then everyone thought." I said to their retreating forms.

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The voice of the flight attendant announcing our arrival to Sea-Tac International took me out of the memory. I rubbed my chest, a habit I had developed every time I thought back to what I did to Alice.

Luckily things seemed to mend between Edward and I. It had taken Emmett longer to come around to speaking to me again, but they both seemed to understand. It's still hard to believe that I was going to be Edward's best man. I could remember that phone call like it was yesterday.

I had just pulled the covers over my head when my cell started to ring. _Christ, don't be work_, I pleaded as I reached blindly for it. "Whitlock," I answered into the phone.

"Guess what Bitch?" Replied the happy voice of my best friend Edward.

"You finally came out of the closet?" I teased.

"Yes and you promised me I could take your anal cherry, so I thought I would call in the favor."

I laughed at that, "Sorry bro, that was popped in the academy. What else can I do for you cock lover?"

I could hear Edward chuckling. "I am getting married Forever V."

I rolled my eyes. Just because I was the last of the guys to lose their virginity didn't mean I still was one.

"No shit." _About time_, I thought. "Mister-different-pussy-every-day is getting hitched?"

"Hey now, I've been in the same pussy for almost seven years now thank you."

I laughed at how quick he defended himself with that. "I know... poor Bella. Is she the reason why California couldn't get batteries during their crisis?" _Shit, that was a lame joke._

"Shut it four eyes," Edward said laughing. _Jesus, I hadn't heard that one since we were kids._

"You know you love me Pretty Boy."

"Just for your sweet ass, Blondie."

"I knew it! You want to dominate me!" I started making retching noises as he laughed.

"Yeah bitch, now suck it!"

We laughed for a few moments longer. "Seriously Eddie," I said once we had calmed down. "Congrats."

"Thanks," He said genuinely. "Okay, moving on before the secretary hears me and thinks I am cheating on Bella or some shit." _Yeah don't need that getting back to Chief Swan_, I thought, snickering some.

"Why Mr. Cullen, I would never be the other woman!" I said in my best southern belle accent, only to fuck it up with my laughter.

"Alright," he said trying to regain his composure, but I knew the smile on his face was there. "You promised way back when we were eleven, twelve and thirteen, respectively, that you would be my best man, as I would be Emmett's and Em would be yours... so, you gonna hold up your end of the bargain?"

Wow, the 'we three brother's plan'. I was surprised that he was pulling that on me. Especially after all the shit I caused.

"Shit, if you really want me there..."

"Of course I do. I know you flaked on Rose and Em though... so I mean, don't say you can if you really can't."

"I didn't flake. I had to work." I groaned. I should have known Rose would make a big deal about it. Not my fault we had a serial rapist who left video clues as a calling card, she knew that I was the top tech in the lab. "I told my sister that…" I trailed off.

"Yeah well, work ain't getting you out of this," he said with a smirk in his voice. "Um..." I heard him clear his throat.

"Does she know you're asking me?" He knew I wasn't asking about Bella.

"No, and she's the maid of honor."

I groaned. "Damn it Edward. You know she hates me."

It was hit turn to groan and I could just imagine him, pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration like he always does. "I don't think it's all what you think it is man... and besides, I've told you how much I hate the Armani wearing prick she's dating right?"

"Yeah, you've told me. I'll be there man, but you better not feed me to Bella if shit blows up." I warned him.

"Shit will be fine, I'll tell her eventually, just be polite to her. Dance with her like you used to and I am sure it will be okay."

Dance with her like I used to? What the fuck? Was he high? I can't dance with her like I used to because, we're not in love anymore. _Or at least she's not…_

"Of course I'll be polite man."

"Okay then," he said satisfied with my answer. He started snickering. "Has anyone shown you a picture of her recently?"

"Nope, the last picture I got was in the care package you claimed Esme demanded you send me." A package with believe it or not, porn, lotion and a picture of Alice in a bikini. The only thing that I could see being from Esme was the fresh oatmeal cookies. The rest of the package reeked of Emmett's master plan. "Why?"

He chuckled. "Look your best man, that's all I am gonna say."

She never had a problem with my choices before. "Alright?" I was hoping he would elaborate.

"Okay, well I have a meeting here in twenty so I gotta get going, wedding is on the sixth of June, but you gotta get here early."

"Alright, I'll get things squared away and either tell you or Bella the details of when I'm coming."

"Sweet, we'll be waiting. Have fun... bye." He said in a rush, making me wonder if he was running late for the meeting.

"See ya!" I said before I hung up.

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**End Note: Love it, hate it, wanna know more? Leave us a review!!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:****All copyrights, trademarked items, or recognizable characters, plots, etc. mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization.**

**K: Well, y'all seemed to like the first chapter annnnnnnnd loved to hate on Jasper! (NGL, I loved that we got reviews saying he's an asshole, cause well he was… js) **

**Robs: yay! It's Alice's turn, thank you so much for the great response to this story! Hope you like ;) **

**Special thanks to Amber for being awesome and betaing this for us.**

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**APOV:**

"Mr. Jensen, I don't care if the other customer was Marilyn Monroe back from the dead, I paid good money for the silk for those bridesmaid dresses and I will have it, or not only will I no longer support your company in my reviews, I will also contact the Better Business Bureau." I paused letting him finally say something in response.

Britney Spears ordered the very same silk as I had and he wanted to either up the price on me or give it to her. I think not.

"Miss Cullen, no need to threaten such things," he began.

"That wasn't a threat. I fully intend on following through. The wedding the fabric is required for is next week, you better be glad that the dress maker we have is devoted to this project and extremely quick, I have been waiting on this fabric for the last six months and I will be damned if I have to settle." I told him in a stern voice, I was doing my best to remain calm, but in reality I wanted to lose my shit on him.

"Yes, Miss Cullen I understand, and it will be ready in an hour for pick up." I smiled at his defeated tone.

"Thank you very much." I chirped then promptly hung up on him, dropping my phone into my purse as I continued down the avenue, dancing a little to Green Day as it pumped through my car speakers.

My name is Alice Cullen, fashion consultant and critic by day, dancer by night and no, I do not mean the erotic kind, although I did take striptease classes at the local gym to get back in shape.

I pulled into the spot next to a meter and after putting a few quarters in, I ran into the tux shop to pick up my brother's tuxes.

How am I the one doing these things and not the best man? Well, the best man is apparently flying in from out of town and won't be in for another couple of days. He paid for his tux, as had my brother and my best friend's brother, online and I just happened to turn into the errand girl. Thankfully my boss was really lenient and I knew how to get my way with most of these dealers.

I walked into the store and breathed in deeply, I love the smell of new clothes and shoes, best smell in the world if you ask me. I didn't even have to walk all the way to the counter, one of the gentlemen I had been working with met me part way, explaining that he already had everything ready and waiting for me. He handed me all three tuxes with the receipts. I thanked him and left the store, carefully piling the suits in my tiny back seat and then carrying the receipts with me to look them over before I left.

Emmett's order looked pretty much perfect and so did Edward's; they had thrown in a complimentary handkerchief for him because it was his big day, which I thought was a very nice touch. Then I looked at the last order and nearly dropped it when I saw the name.

_Jasper Whitlock._

Oh-my-fucking-god. This has to be someone's idea of a sick joke. I pulled my phone out of my purse and called my older brother.

"Yes Alice?" Came my brother's voice from the speaker.

"Who's your best man Edward?" I asked him quickly, noticing the panic in my voice.

"Come on Ali, I know you guys have history, but he's been one of my best friends since I was nine… and I mean you two used to be pretty tight too… remember?"

"Yeah Ed, we were tight. Only because he wanted to pork me really bad after I got tits."

"Wow, Ali, Jazz is not that much of a dick." He defended his best friend as I sighed in defeat.

"Yeah," I agreed half-heartedly. I couldn't help being bitter about everything that happened, but I knew better than to argue with my brother. Those boys were close, almost like brothers, despite their penchant for boning each other's sisters. They even unintenionally went into the same career field, my brother was a Special Investigator for the police department, Emmett was a motorcycle cop and Jasper became a Forensics Investigator.

They were so close, they even made their respective younger sisters close. Rose, Bella and I were now the best of friends, but I never would have even spoken to them if it hadn't been for those three. Of course, I was the only one who ended up really hurt by everything, Rosalie ended up marrying Emmett, and as of next week Bella would be officially my sister-in-law.

"Listen Ali… I gotta go pick him up from the airport, then I'm taking him to the Hales. I'll pick up the tuxes after that, okay? I know you have a date with Garrett tonight, so just relax and have fun. Jazz promises to be on his best behavior while he's here, it'll be like back in the day… okay? You two used to live around each other just fine without much interaction." He reasoned.

I hung up with my brother and sat in my car, slumped forward with my forehead pressed against the steering wheel. I couldn't believe we were in this predicament. I was deathly afraid of what he would think of me, of him finding everything out, basically of him in general.

According to Rose, he had found himself some little white trash whore to spend his lonely nights with. _Of course he had_. I remember the three of us, Bella included, making fun of Jasper's choices in women after me and Rosalie says that he really scraped the bottom of the barrel with this last one. I tried very hard to be happy for him. Still trying. I swear, it's just hard.

Maybe my brother was right; Jasper and I had spent a lot of time together before without much interaction. Little did he know, but from day one I was pretty much obsessed with Jasper. _God I was such a fool_.

***~*~*June 16****th**** 1993*~*~***

Mommy told me to go play with Edward, Emmett and Rosalie, but it always seemed like Edward didn't want me to play with them. It's not my fault the only person close to my age was Emmett's little sister and she had to move far away with her mommy last year. Or Seth, but his mommy got into a fight with mine and told us we couldn't play together anymore.

The bigger kids rode their bikes away from me, and even though I tried to keep up and stuff, I still ended up falling down and hurting my knee.

That's how I met Jasper, Rosalie's new brother. He's really pretty, like Rosalie, except for he's not pretty 'cause he's a boy. So he's handsome, but I don't like that word. It's a dumb word. He has the same hair as Rosalie, blond with curls. His eyes are lighter though, really, really light blue almost white. They are pretty; I couldn't stop looking at them. I know it's not polite to stare, at least mommy is always telling me so, but I couldn't help it. I had never seen eyes like his before.

Then he sat me on the porch where Rosalie lived and took care of my knee while he talked to me. His voice sounded funny, no one else around here talked like him and I told him so. Then he told me that he talked fine and we all talked funny. And well, that made me think… How can we all be talking funny if we all sound the same?

He was really nice too, he didn't complain about me falling like Edward did. I liked that about him, something inside me told me we were going to be friends.

"Yer cute," I told him, suddenly feeling very shy.

"Thanks darlin', you're pretty cute too." He told me, giving me the most beautiful half smile I had ever seen. Everything in my tummy spun a zillion times and I felt like my heart was going to beat out of my chest. So this is what they are always talking about. Love. I'm in love. I was gonna tell him and maybe even hold his hand, but then Rosalie and the boys came back.

I felt a little jealous when Jasper said he wanted to play baseball with my brother and Emmett. I wanted Jasper to stay and be my friend. I grabbed his hand and felt a tingling sensation, like my hand had fallen asleep only better and he turned to face me.

"Jazz-purr?" I whispered out and he crouched down so he was eye level with me.

"Yeah Ali Cat?"

"I'm gonna marry you someday." I whispered to him honestly, hoping he'd decide to stay. He nodded, making my heart thud wildly when he smiled at me again.

"Sure." He whispered back and kissed me on my cheek. _He loves me too!_ I squealed in my head. "Let me know if that hurts later okay?" He pointed at my knee.

"Okay," I whispered, not sure what else to say because he was gonna go play with the boys and that made me sad.

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**Please let us know what you think and review! We'd love to hear from you!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: All copyrights, trademarked items, or recognizable characters, plots, etc. mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization.**

**K:** Here's chapter 3. So apparently Jasper had a redeeming quality to y'all. Interesting. Also, a lot of y'all asked about their ages. Jasper is 25, while Alice is 23 (and if you go to http://morethanfriendsbyalsper. Blogspot. Com –no spaces- you'd know that :P, also this takes place in present time -2010- (that should help with the flash backs)

**Robs: **Lookie here another Jasper chapter... AND the moment y'all have been waiting for is here. There are gonna see each other again for the first time in five years :::gasp:::

**Thanks to all the readers and reviewers of this story! WE LOVE Y'ALL SO MUCH!!**

**And Special thanks to Amberstar63 our very awesome beta who we love dearly.**

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**JPOV:**

I grinned when the reddish hair of one Edward Cullen came into view as I walked to baggage claim. We did the manly one arm hug and laughed about each other's looks; his hair was longer then I remembered and apparently I wasn't dressed to impress.

"Fuck off dude, I had to work twenty-four hours, then fly ten hours to get my happy ass here for you." I teased, punching him in the arm. "I'm tired, need coffee, but I'm glad to be back." _Not to mention, glad to be away from Kelly._

Edward grinned as he closed the trunk of his car once my bags where inside. "Well, we have to get the tuxes, but I'll get you some coffee beforehand."

"Marry me," I teased before getting in the seat. He just shook his head, laughing as he proclaimed his undying love for Bella. I gave him my best smile as I watched the city zoom past us, wishing that someday I might have what he has, but with Alice… again.

The ride towards our destination was a pleasant one. Edward was telling me how insane Bella was being with wedding planning, especially when it came to the catering. That made sense to me since Bella had her own catering company. But I noticed the conversation always jumped over the topic of Alice and it made me wonder if this was what the week was going to be like, avoiding it like the plague only to have to face it head on when we were forced to.

We arrived at a four story building. Its brick and mortar walls giving it an historical look to it, 'Meyer Fashion Consulting, LLC.' was scrawled out in a mirrored finish.

"What, you couldn't just order yours online?" I teased as we got out of the car. Edward just flipped me off, before holding the door open.

I followed him through the lobby, wondering what we were doing here. Once inside the elevator I finally asked.

"Alright, I thought we were getting the tuxes?"

He started to rub the back of his neck as he gave me a stupid grin. "Picking up the tuxes?"

I raised my eyebrow skeptically at him. "At Meyer Fashion... what-the-fuck-ever? I thought you were ordering them and having them shipped to you?"

"Uh... no... Um, Ali picked them up." He hesitated slightly, "She's Bella's second in command and the only reason the wedding is coming together on time."

"Ali?" I asked feeling as though the wind had been knocked out of me. I wasn't expecting to see her, not this soon anyway. "Fuck... Jesus couldn't you have warned me! I could have at least shaved!" At least my cap was hiding my over grown hair, I thought as I scrubbed my face roughly with my hands.

I could see Edward studying me. "She has a thing for scruffy guys... not that you'd care about that right?" He shot an eyebrow up, challenging me.

"Right, 'cause I've got Kelly and she's got Gerald."

Edward snickered as the doors opened up on the third floor. "Garrett," he corrected.

I rolled my eyes. "Whatever," I huffed, sounding like a spoiled child.

Edward turned his head slightly to smirk at me. "You seem jealous bro."

_You think?_ I thought as I glared at him slightly. "As long as she's happy what does it matter right?"

"Yeah," Edward agreed, but I could tell he saw right through my bullshit.

The closer we got to where her office was, the more I felt like I was going to be sick. I hadn't been this nervous since our first kiss.

**~*~*~*~*~ February 19****th**** 2000~*~*~*~*~**

"What the hell is he doing?" I asked Emmett, looking over to see him chewing on the inside of his cheek.

"I think Rosie just challenged him," he offered.

I scratched my head trying to figure out how we got from Alice's thirteenth birthday party to this. "I don't get it."

"Okay pick your places people!" My trouble-making sister called out to everyone. Sometimes I wish she didn't know shit about me and Alice. Granted there's nothing going on with us, I mean sure I thought about it but I'm like one of her brothers', so that would make it wrong? _Right?_

"She said that he would traumatize someone by kissing them," Emmett whispered before sitting down. Edward put his drink on the table and smirked at us, shoving me between him and Emmett.

I looked between my two best friends, trying to catch up with the change of events. "But I thought she meant like if Alice kissed her brother it would be traumatizing?"

"Are you boys done gossiping like the bunch of girls you are?" Rose asked impatiently.

I looked at Edward trying to get him to stop this, this wasn't fair to Alice. Instead he gave me a look that clearly told me to shut-the-fuck-up.

"Yes ma'am." I heard Emmett respond to Rose. I shook my head slightly, he is seriously whipped.

_So are you and you're not even getting laid. _A voice said in my head

I felt the guys grab my arms, pulling me down roughly. I made a strange 'oof' sound as my butt collided with the hard wood floor. "Dicks."

"Yes we have them," Edward said humorlessly. "You're supposed to sit."

"That's not what I…" I shook my head at him. I was calling him a dick, not what he thought. And maybe I didn't want to sit or and play, and I didn't think I could take watching Alice kiss someone else.

_God you're pathetic._

I looked up to see Alice watching me as she waited for the game to start. I gave her a half smile that went bigger when she ducked her head and started blushing. Rose had told me that Alice had a crush on me but I don't see how, I was just the smart kid that hung out with her brother.

I heard Rose prattle on about the rules of the game and how she would go first as an example. As much as I loved her, she was so freaking vain sometimes it wasn't funny. I couldn't help but smirk as Edward jumped up, ready to take his opportunity to prove something to Rose.

I watched as Rose tried her best to look uncomfortable. Poor Emmett shifted next to me, averting his eyes. This is exactly why I didn't want to play this stupid game.

When Edward and Rose broke their kiss, you could tell Edward was definitely pleased with what he done. Rose on the other hand was trying to hide the fact that she liked the kiss, but I don't think she was doing a good job of it. For starters, she went to her spot way too fast and wouldn't keep eye contact with anyone. Once she was settled enough she finally spit out a comment about thinking of Emmett the whole time, which seemed to appease him. But I could see in her eyes that she really liked it.

The game continued. Awkwardly, Angela and Ben kissed next. If they weren't so uncomfortable with each other, I would have thought it was cute to see them. I knew Ben had a thing for Angie, and from what I heard Alice say; the feeling was mutual.

"Okay Alice, your turn..." Rose said. _Oh great now she acts like she's concerned_. I mean come on! Does she really think Alice is going to want to chance her first kiss on the possibility she might have to kiss her brother?!

I lifted my knees to my chest and held on to my legs, preparing to hide if she had to kiss Edward or worse, Eric Yorkie. I saw Edward raise an eyebrow at me and I just shook my head at him. There was no way in hell I was going to tell him that I was debating on whether to jump in front of whoever the bottle lands on so she has to kiss me, or vomit at the thought of someone else's tongue in her mouth.

Either declaration would surely get my ass handed to me.

I watched as Alice's dainty hand spun the glass bottle with a simple flick of her wrist. The damned glass bottle taunting me, knowing that it could make or break my sanity as it spun around in two… three… five… six circles.

_How pathetic was I? Letting the centrifugal force of the bottle decide my fate._

"Jasper, stop being a goon and give the girl a birthday kiss!" I heard Rose snap at me, bringing me from my mental ass kicking.

I pulled myself up to my feet and met Alice in the middle. _Well this is interesting_, I thought as I looked down at her.

She looked up at me, slightly chewing on her lip. "Um... height difference?" she pointed out.

_Fuck being six feet tall_.

"I uh, could pick you up?" I suggested, feeling the heat rise to my face as I processed the implications of that. _Of course having her in my arms and her legs wrapped around my waist…_

The sound of someone clearing their throat brought me out of my mini fantasy. "Or you could use a bar stool?" Edward suggested curtly.

"Uh, yeah…" _Jesus Jazz, why couldn't you think of that?_ I scolded myself as I went to get a barstool. _Probably because I was enjoying my little day dream of pining Alice between me and the wall as I kissed her and ran my hands_ – _Whoa… what the fuck?_

_Oh Jesus, please tell me my breath is okay_, I thought as I did a quick check.

When I came back into the living room, Alice was staring down at her shoes while everyone else whispered and chattered. I placed the stool beside her and the room got quiet. And not needle dropping quiet either. No, we're talking quiet enough to hear planes taking off from the airport in Seattle, quiet. Okay maybe I'm exaggerating, but there is no way in hell everyone cannot hear my heart racing right now.

Alice climbed up on to the stool and sat on her knees. She placed her hands on my shoulders, as my hand instinctively went to her hips. I made sure to keep a foot between us because I'd be embarrassed if she knew I was being a typical hormonal teenager right now.

She took a deep breath and looked at me. She was shaking slightly and I didn't know if it was fear, excitement, or just 'cause there were eleven people staring at us, waiting with baited breath.

I gave her a small smile. "You trust me?"

She nodded, "Of course."

"Then close your eyes and follow my lead okay?"

"Okay," she whispered as she closed her eyes. I gently cupped her cheek in my hand and smiled as she relaxed into my touch. I slowly brought my lips to hers before closing my own eyes. Her lips were so soft against mine that I wasn't sure I was actually touching them.

I stepped closer applying a little more pressure, feeling her hands on my neck.

I touched my tongue to her bottom lip and she opened her mouth slightly. When my tongue made contact with hers I was gone. All I could think about was getting closer to her as my hand slid to her lower back and pulled her in closer to me. I wanted to taste more of her, she was sweet like cherries and for once everything made sense to me.

I vaguely heard the rest of the gang cheering and whistling at us, but all there was for me was her. Alice tilted her head, deepening the kiss as she started to play with the hair at the base of my neck. I felt my body shudder and I knew she had an idea of what that did to me but it didn't stop her. If anything it egged her on. I pushed closer, moving the hand that was gripping the fabric at the side of her dress for dear life, and sliding it up into her hair. Her arms wrapped around my shoulders.

I don't know what came over me but just as I slid my tongue in farther, I fisted my hand in her hair and tugged on it slightly. Much to my surprise she moaned into mouth.

_Sweet Jesus, I wanted to hear that again_.

Emmett's shout of approval broke through the lustful fog rapidly taking over my body, causing me to end the kiss. I put my forehead to hers, panting slightly.

"Happy Birthday Ali Cat," I whispered, opening my eyes to see a happy smile on her lips.

"Thanks," she said breathlessly.

_God... I want to kiss her again_.

"Maybe next year we should play Seven Minutes in Heaven," Rose teased.

I went to roll my eyes and realized my glasses were slightly fogged. I chuckled slightly as I pulled back to take them off. I saw Alice give me a confused look. "My glasses are fogged," I explained as I wiped them off with my shirt.

"Sorry for fogging up your glasses," Alice apologized, quickly getting off the stool.

"I uh... sorry," I stuttered out confused. I wasn't upset about it, I just thought it was funny that we fogged them up. I picked the stool up and saw Alice back in her spot hugging her knees. I shook my head and took the stool away.

When I came back, I sat down with my legs crossed and looked at my lap. Why was Alice acting like she didn't like it? _Did I do something wrong?_

I felt Emmett nudge me, "How was your first kiss playboy?"

I bit back a smile as my face heated up. Emmett knew me well enough to know that was a confirmation that I liked it.

"Come on that looked hot from where I was sitting." Emmett said nudging me again.

I nodded my head in Edward's direction, silently telling Emmett to shut it.

"Hey man I kissed your sister, so you're allowed one." Edward said before chewing his lip.

_Okay so he caught that…_

"Yeah, but it's different," I said softly as I looked over at Alice. She had her cheek on her knee looking at Rose who was going on about something or other.

"How so?" Emmett asked as Edward quirked an eyebrow at me.

"Uh... well Rose is older? And uh... not blood relation?" I stammered out.

Edward shrugged, "Like I said, just this once... 'cause that... the tongue and stuff was my fault." He lamented. I just chewed on my cheek and nodded. That was Edward's way of telling me Alice was off limits. "So you can talk to Em and I'll go sit by Ben over there." He pointed over to where Ben was sitting next to Angie before getting up and joining them.

Emmett nudged me again. _Seriously, what the fuck?_

"What?"

"How was it?"

I nodded my head. G_reat, fantastic, better than I thought possible._ "Hot," I said chucking slightly. _Yes, definitely hot_.

Emmett grinned as if he knew some big ass secret. "So you gonna do anything about that?" he asked waggling his eyebrows at me.

"About what?" I asked dumbly.

"The obvious mad chemistry between you and little Ali?"

I shook my head, "Ed would kill me."

Emmett shrugged. "I wouldn't let him _kill you_. Wouldn't a beating be worth it though?"

Sure easy for him to say, he's twice my size. And sure, Edward's a tad shorter than me, but he makes up for it in speed.

I glanced over at Alice who was smiling about something now. "Yeah, but I can't man, she just turned thirteen." _And I'm going to be sixteen_, I added in thought. Besides, I don't want to cause more rumors. It's bad enough the shit they say about me and my parents. What would they say about Alice and me dating?

Emmett shrugged again. "Yeah well… not trying to piss you off or anything... but she's starting to get pretty hot, and you know... other guys are gonna notice."

I nodded in response. I knew that. I've known that for a while. Eric had expressed his fondness for Alice's new curves on more than one occasion.

_Wait, what the hell did Emmett just say?_

I punched Emmett in the arm. "You have Rosie man."

"Dude I do, and I am one lucky motherfucker... but I ain't blind." He laughed. I hated when he laughed after I hit him.

"Neither am I man," I confessed. "I know Alice is growing up. I just can't yet..."

Emmett nodded and I felt oddly relieved that he understood what I meant. "Hey don't let this go anywhere but between us, 'cause Rosie scares the shit out of me," Emmett said leaning closer and lowering his voice, "but I hear Ali is saving herself for you." He informed me as he raised an eyebrow, giving me a pointed look. "If you follow what I am saying." I nodded, I knew what he was talking about, I just didn't understand why me. "And I wanted to say treat her with respect or I'll kill you myself."

I nodded. "Trust me, if I ever do anything to hurt her you and Ed both have my permission to kick the crap out of me."

"We'd do it without your permission," his tone was deadly serious.

I looked him dead in the eye so he could see how serious I was being. "Okay then, I give you permission to kill me."

He nodded. "Thank you," he said grinning before glancing at Alice. "Be gentle too..." He trailed of suggestively.

I groaned and put my head in my hands. "Jesus Em, does everything go back to sex with you?"

"Just saying...you know height difference..." he chuckled slightly as I looked over at him. "Don't break her... I am sure there's a breaking point even when a girl has that much flexibility."

_Oh Jesus, he did not bring up the fact that she can stand on her toes and bring her leg up over her head_.

I blushed as images of her doing various stretches for her ballet classes flashed through my head. "Emmett, okay, I get your point. _If_ it ever comes to that, I'll be careful with her."

He nodded and grinned, "Good."

My memory faded back into my head as the sound of a sultry musical voice hit my ears. I bit my lip as my eyes focused on Alice's backside. She had the phone resting between her ear and shoulder as she talked to someone on the phone.

I stood back as Edward walked further into the office. I took my time, just wanting to look at her longer. She had definitely grown up in the last five years. Her hair was shorter than I remembered it and it now hung in loose curls to her shoulders. Her legs still looked fucking amazing.

_Damn this is going to be a hard week._

"Hey Ali!" Edward's cheerful greeting reminded me that I wasn't alone.

Alice waved at him and held up a finger. "I swear to Christ, Jonathan, I will tell Mike the truth about the Crate and Barrel knock off bed if you don't –" she paused, listening as the person on the line spoke. "That's what I thought." She said victoriously. "Now, you're gonna be at the chapel to do our hair at what time? Ten A.M.? Yes... that is what we agreed on. Thank you Jon, give a kiss to Mike for me." _Jesus, she was no longer walked on, that's for sure_.

I shoved my hands into my pant pockets as I watched her hang up and make her way to Edward, where she hugged him tightly, grinning widely.

Edward turned them so that she was now facing me. "Look at who I brought with me." He said as he smirked. Alice's smile dropped as her eyes got wide.

I felt the left corner of my lips turn up as I tried to smile at her. "Hi Ali Cat..."

She bounced from foot to foot, her hands locked together and hanging in front of her as she turned to look at her brother. "Um... what's _he_ doing here?" She asked.

_Oh good, so this is a shock for her too_, I thought as I looked at Edward with my own eyebrow raised at him.

"Well, I haven't seen him for about five years... I thought I'd hang with him a bit," he said giving Alice a pointed look. "Since he is still my best friend."

She huffed at him before turning her attention back to me. "Hello Jasper, how are you?" She asked formally.

I straightened my shoulders, bringing myself to my full height. A natural reaction when one is treating me with formalities in their voice. "Good, thank you Alice, how about yourself?"

"Fantastic. Now that you're here, can I expect that I'll no longer have to run errands for my big brother?" she asked giving me a polite smile.

"Sorry to have inconvenienced you ma'am." I responded, silently cursing the fact that my accent came out thicker than I wanted. I looked over at Edward quickly. He was watching us with confusion written all over his face.

"I wasn't inconvenienced," Alice said. I looked to see her looking down as her cheeks turned slightly pink, making me curious what was she embarrassed about?

I looked back at Edward. "Tuxes?"

"Yeah, did you want to try yours on real fast to make sure it fits? 'Cause, Ali here," he said as he nudged Alice earning a smile from her, "has a way with these dealers to get shit done quickly if it doesn't fit."

I chewed on my lip and nodded. It made sense seeing as I was the only one who hadn't been fitted properly. "Uh yeah."

Alice walked over to a bar that was hanging off the side off her desk. My eyes stopped where an origami swan sat on top of a stack of papers. I smiled slightly at it and wondered if she still liked them or if it was just a coincidence. "This one is yours," Alice said breaking me out of my musings as she handed me a Tux. "Bathroom is right there," she said pointing to a door across the room.

"Thanks," I said turning to where she indicated. As I walked by Edward, I took my hat off and flung it at him hard. He chuckled slightly so I knew he was aware that I was calling him a dick for this situation.

Once inside her private bathroom, I took one look at myself and groaned. My hair was almost completely past my ears, I was growing a two day beard, and my white button down was wrinkled all to hell.

Now I knew why that jackass told me to dress to impress. He had this planned! _Fucker!_ I thought as I stripped out of my clothes and put the Tux on. Everything seemed okay. I mean the pants were good, the shirt wasn't too tight and the sleeves were the right length.

"Uh, it looks okay to me." I said loud enough for them to hear.

"Come outside," I heard Alice instruct. I rolled my eyes cursing to myself as I quickly tucked the shirt into my pants before opening the door.

Alice looked me over, nodding before clearing her throat. "Spin slowly please?"

Probably the most inopportune time to be thinking about this, but the way she worded her demand in the form of a question reminded me of the one time she tried to dominate me in bed, causing me to smirk at her. "Want my arms up too?" I asked, wondering if she'd get the reference.

She smirked back, and the sparkle in her eyes told me she remembered. "Yes please."

I just laughed slightly shaking my head as Edward snickered. He had no clue what his little sister and I used to do behind closed doors. I slowly spun for Alice so she could inspect the fitting.

When I completed my revolution, I was now facing Alice who was biting her lip and nodding at me. "Looks good," she said.

I nodded and looked down at the hem on the pant legs. "The pants will be okay once I have the shoes on I'm sure." I rocked back on my heels to wiggle my sock covered toes at her. "I didn't think you'd appreciate a test run with the chucks." I teased.

"Yeah..." She said crossing her arms and biting on her thumb nail. "Um... go ahead and take that off... glad that at least one thing is good to go for this wedding." She mumbled, smiling slightly.

I nodded and went back to the bathroom, quickly changing before coming back out. Alice was leaning against her desk as she and Ed spoke in low tones. I took my hat back from him tucking it into my back pocket. When they were done with their conversation I felt I needed to thank her again.

"Thanks for helping out. Like I said, sorry if it's been a problem for you Ali." I said giving her a sad smile.

"I've dealt with worse on my own," she explained giving me a sad smile in return. I noticed Edward scowling at Alice and figured it had to do with prom.

Alice walked over to the bar that was holding the remaining Tuxes and grabbed them. "Make sure you guys don't get them dirty, especially you Ed. Yours is white and I will die if I have to find a dry cleaner to take shit out a suit jacket in under twenty-four hours."

I laughed a little at her instructions. "I guess it's a good thing Em's not in charge of these." I teased.

"No," she said arching her eyebrow in amusement, "you are as a matter of fact." She said as she handed them over. Her hand brushed against mine and that same current that once flowed between us, sparked back again. I bit my lip, watching her to see if she felt it too. I hadn't felt that in so long I wasn't sure if I wasn't imagining it. But I knew she felt it, the way her mouth formed a slight 'O' shape in surprise and her eyes locked onto mine. _Do you feel that with him?_ I asked her silently.

I gave her a small smile. "I'll make sure they're safe and ready for the big show." I broke eye contact with her to look at Edward who was smiling like he knew the answers to some important question. "You ready?"

"Yep," he responded, grinning as he pulled Alice into a hug. "You coming to dinner tonight?"

She pulled away, and her eyes darted from Edward to me and back. "Uh no, date with Rhett remember?"

I saw Edward's smile fall a little at the mention of the Armani prick. "Oh so then, I'll see yah tomorrow?"

She nodded in response before looking at me. "See yah later... Nnn-Jasper," she stuttered.

I nodded in response, "Take care Alice." I turned to head towards the door but was thwarted by Edward's next question.

"What? Y'all aren't gonna hug?"

I closed my eyes, trying to steel my nerves. "Don't want to wrinkle the Tuxes?" I offered as an excuse, wanting to kick my own ass for sounding seventeen again.

Edward came over, grabbing the Tuxes from me. "Asshole," I muttered to him under my breath. I turned to see Alice looking rather unsure herself. I gave her a quick smile as she held her arms out for me. I laughed slightly as I closed the distance between us, pulling her close to me. "It's just a hug amongst old friends, right?"

"Right," she said, hugging me back. I held on tighter, fighting against every impulse I had screaming at me to kiss her and tell her how much I missed her and still, to this day, loved her. But I never did. Instead I let her go. She pulled away, quietly moving to sit behind her desk where she began working again.

"Come on..." I heard Edward whisper. "Still want coffee?"

I looked over at Alice one last time while nodding in response to Edward.

This is definitely going to be a hard week.

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**End note: Reviews are better than playing Spin the B****ottle at your birthday party ;) **


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: All copyrights, trademarked items, or recognizable characters, plots, etc. mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization.**

**Special thanks to AmberStar63, who is awesome, for betaing this for us!

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**APOV:**

I pretended to work, opening a word document and typing needless words and mumbo jumbo into it until they left. Pretending not to notice when Jasper looked back at me over his shoulder before leaving. Then I let it out, I laid my head on the desk and let the tears flow.

_Fuck. Me. Hard._

I thought I could handle this, I thought that if I was formal with him then I could just get through this week and we could move on in our separate lives.

I was wrong, he broke me down quickly, making me laugh with an inside joke and his smile. That smile I always thought was only for me. _Damn him_. Combined with the fact I sensed his presence before I saw him, I knew it was going to be how it used to be.

Except this time I had Garrett. I loved Garrett, I think I might even be _in love_ with him. He's sweet, charming, had good fashion sense and looked hot all the time. And I'm sure once we get to that point, the sex will be great too.

Yeah I know what you're all thinking, _they haven't had sex?_ Well, guess what? Sometimes a relationship isn't all about the sex. Sex isn't everything… besides, we do other things, and Rhett is really good with his tongue.

So why am I thinking about _him _and _his_ tongue and the way sex felt with _him_ and how good _he_ smelled? I hit my forehead against the desk again. Jasper cracked my carefully pieced together exterior, leaving me feeling like vulnerable, young and stupid Alice again. And damnit, I am _not_ that little girl anymore.

***~*~* October 12****th**** 2001*~*~***

I was excited, today was my very first homecoming parade, and it was topped off with a bonfire at the beach. Today had been perfect. I had spent most of the day with Jasper – and my brother and Emmett too – but Jasper was there, and since that fateful day last year it was almost like we were bonded or something. I could tell he wanted me around a lot.

I told my friend Kim about us and at first she didn't believe me; after all what would a senior want with a lowly freshman? But now she's convinced too. You really can't deny the spark that is there between Jasper and I, I mean, we sleep together almost every night.

Not in the sexual way, but in the 'hey I need to sleep because I have terrible nightmares and you keep them away' sort of way.

And now I was going to the bonfire with him – _and_ Edward and Emmett and Rosalie – but I mean, Emmett and Rosie will probably be making out and Edward will probably be trying to hook up with Tanya Flemming, so it will be pretty much just me and Jasper. I smiled at the thought as I pulled on my shorts and tank top. It had been unseasonably warm and while I was sure it was going to be cooler later tonight, it would just give me a legit reason to cuddle with Jasper.

_What?_ Nerdy boy is soft, but hard all at the same time… And he smells really, _really_ good.

I pulled on knee high socks and put on my pumas before checking myself out in the mirror. I think I looked pretty good, years of ballet had sculpted my body into a rather defined, muscular yet lean machine. I think Jasper likes legs though, he's always looking at them, I looked down at mine; they were rather chicken leg-ish and I had knobby knees. I frowned slightly at myself.

_Note to self: Work on getting sexier legs_.

The rumble of Jasper's motorcycle interrupted my self-criticism. I pushed my student ID and some cash into my pocket before running out my bedroom door and taking the stairs two at a time. Mom was at the bottom of the stairs, shaking her head, laughing quietly at my excitement. "Bye mom, see yah later." I told her, kissing her cheek before running out the door and greeting Jasper just as he was climbing off the bike, running his long fingers through his wavy hair.

_I would love for his fingers to_ –

"Hey Jazz!" Edward called from behind me, pushing me out of the way and disturbing my little fantasy as he ran to greet his friend.

"Hey Ed," he hollered back, brushing non-existent dirt off the front of his khakis, making me look at the bulge the girls and I were constantly giggling about in class when we talked about boys. He looked back up at me and smiled warmly, making the butterflies flutter in my stomach. "Hi Ali Cat."

I waved stupidly, "Hey N.B."

"So you're gonna drive your bike to First Beach?" Ed wrinkled his nose, no doubt worried about sand getting in the gears and such. The good thing about Ed is; he's a total car and bike buff. He and Rosalie really know their shit when it comes to all that.

Jasper nodded. "Dude, there's a parking lot you know," he shook his head while he laughed.

"Yeah I know... So how are we working this?" He pointed behind him, "Em and Rose are already busy in the back seat." I looked over and indeed, they were mauling each other. _It's a wonder they could breathe like that_.

I looked back to see Jasper shrug, leaning against his bike a little, "I got a helmet for Ali... So she'll be safe with me if you want to go surprise Tanya," he waggled his eyebrows knowingly at my brother, who chucked and nodded.

"What do you say Ali... you wanna ride with Jasper?" I nodded quickly. _Yes, I want to ride with Jasper, now go the fuck away Edward._

Jasper smiled and held out a very cool looking black and pink helmet. He got a girlie helmet for me, meaning he wanted me to ride with him more… _Oh-my-fucking-god, I am squealing so hard inside right then you have no idea. _I did my best to contain my excitement as I rushed to Jasper's side.

"You got chick's helmet," Ed stated, raising his eyebrow at the two of us.

"It's for Ali. Your mom would kill me if I didn't have to proper safety gear for her," he responded, smirking.

Edward simply chuckled and shook his head at us, "'Kay dude, meet us there?"

Jasper nodded, "Yep, we'll see yah there." He waved, then looked over at me, "Come here, let's get this thing on you." I walked closer, my eyes locked on his.

_Gently he leaned down and captured my lips with his, thrusting his tongue into my mouth as his arms pulled me closer, his hands groping my ass hard as he continued to assault my mouth with kisses. _

"Aren't you gonna get cold Ali Cat?" Jasper asked, breaking me out of my fantasy.

"Um… What?"

He laughed, "Your outfit... aren't you gonna get cold?"

I shrugged, "That's what the knee highs are for…"

Jasper shook his head a little as he pushed the helmet onto my head and strapped it up. "Too tight?" I shook my head no and he nodded in kind, "Alright, so once I'm on, you get on and hold on, okay?"

"You're not gonna help me get on this beast?" I asked, incredulously.

He laughed at me. "Yes, Ali Cat." He got on and then held his hand out for me, "It's not that big of a bike you know," he raised an eyebrow at me as I climbed on behind him.

"Um... should I?" I wrapped my arms loosely around his waist, sighing happily as my hands splayed across his sides.

"Yep, but I want you to hold on tighter... Precious cargo and all," he gave me a rather seductive look as he glanced over his shoulder. _Oh dear God, is he flirting with me?_ I did as he said and held on tighter, pressing my cheek against his back after I left a secret soft kiss.

"Okay... like this?"

He nodded, "Yep. Follow my lead into the turns okay?"

It was my turn to nod, "Okay."

I watched as he began putting his own helmet on and then paused, "Oh and if I'm going too fast, just squeeze tighter."

"Okay…"_ Did he do that often?_ I was suddenly nervous. But after he put his helmet on I felt his broad hand touch both of mine.

"I won't let anything happen to you Ali Cat." He assured me.

I leaned my head against his back, "I trust you." Then he started the bike and took off, it was actually pretty fun, we were laughing. Feeling the wind whipping against me made me realize that the outfit I was wearing was probably a stupid idea, especially when he picked up speed. I hugged him tightly for warmth. I was actually having fun with him like this, it was surprisingly peaceful.

That was until he decided to show me a trick and popped a wheelie just as we got to the parking lot; honestly, it scared the shit out of me. I screamed loud enough I'm sure everyone in America heard it. I'm fairly sure I panicked Jasper because he parked quickly and jumped off the bike, pulling his helmet off in a hurry.

"Stay there, I'll help you down." He told me, I had no intention of moving, I was scared stiff. "Hey... Ali look at me." I turned my head to look at him, he seemed very worried. He slowly took my helmet off and resting it next to his on the bike before cupping my cheeks and rubbing wetness off of them. _Had I been scared enough to cry?_ "You're okay Ali... I promise I won't hurt you," he whispered.

"Don't... ever... do... that... again. Please." I stuttered out.

He grabbed my hands, wrapping them around his neck and then wrapped his arms around my waist. "I promise, never again," he whispered as he pulled me off the bike, letting me slide down his body. I looked up into his eyes and I could almost swear they reflected the desire that I had for him. "Now come on. We've got a bonfire to attend," he smiled and I grinned like an idiot right back.

"You're okay right? You're not cold or anything?" he asked me quickly, looking down at my shirt and blushing a little, my eyes followed suit and then I abruptly covered my chest with my free hand. Apparently adrenaline was still pumping through my body because I was unaware of how the chilly air was affecting my body.

"A little cold yeah…" I gave him a half smile.

"Here," he told me as he unzipped and took off his Beatles hoodie, handing it to me. "It's already warm for yah," he smirked as I bit back a grin that would probably break my face.

"Thanks," I put it on and pulled my hair out of it before zipping it up, taking a moment to enjoy the smell of Jasper that enveloped me. "Aren't you gonna get cold now?" I asked, looking up at him as he watched me.

"Nah," he pulled me close to him, wrapping his arms around me in front of him as we walked. "That's what I got you for." We walked slowly, taking in the various students, half of which already looked drunk. He continued to walk me on the outskirts of the party. Maybe he was considering taking me somewhere and making himself a man, as Edward and Emmett put it. I practically sighed as I thought about it, some of the girls talked about how bad it hurt the first time, but I bet my Nerdy Boy would be gentle with me. _Oh please let Jasper take me somewhere._

He nudged me slightly, "You excited?"

_Fuck did he just read my mind? Did I moan out loud…_ _or worse?_ I looked up at him as he raised an eyebrow at me. "Uh… Oh! The bonfire. Yeah," I grinned at him. "Really excited." I said as I wrapped both of my arms around one of his, making him smile back at me. "What happens at these things?"

"Not a whole heck of a lot. The cheerleaders get you all pumped for the big game. There's a fire to burn our rival's mascot and the pep band plays fight songs." He shrugged, "We usually kick back by the fire and enjoy the night."

I laughed a little half heartedly, "Meaning you guys just go to watch the cheerleaders bounce around, huh?" I turned my head to see my brother talking to Tanya, one of those cheerleaders who were so perfect it literally made you gag a little. He laughed at my comment.

"Actually…" He shook his head a little, "No... No I usually watch the fire and try to guess who falls into it this year."

That was interesting. "You don't like the cheerleaders Nerdy Boy?" He shook his head, "Why not?" I asked, looking over at the group. "They're really pretty and... they have boobs and stuff." I loosened my grip on him, realizing I could never compete with someone like that if they figured out what I already knew about Jasper.

He shrugged, "Not my type."

I tilted my head to look at him, "What's your type?"

He beamed down at me. "Not them…" he laughed, I joined in.

"Me either…" I felt dumb the instant I said it.

"Well I'm sure Ed will be relieved that his baby sister isn't checking out the cheerleaders."

"You guys didn't really think I was a lesbian, did you?" I asked, concerned.

He shook his head, "No, but I think Ed is kind of hoping you are so he doesn't have to worry about kicking a friends ass." He informed me, looking ahead suddenly. I heard a beat and realized the school band was playing a Green Day song, making me squeal and clap my hands.

"They are playing cool music N.B!" I exclaimed, breaking away to dance in front of him, shaking my ass a little more than necessary and making him laugh.

After a few minutes Jasper grabbed my hand and laced his fingers with mine. "Come on the dunes are the best place to watch this…" He told me before leading me up the sand covered hill, stopping once we got to a relatively deserted section. I looked down to see the coach addressing the crowd, but could barely hear what he was saying. Jasper sat and then pulled me back so I was nestled between his legs with his arms wrapped around my waist.

"See this is where the coach gets everyone pumped for the game. It's kinda corny and somewhat like that scene in Grease…" he whispered in my ear, I nodded to let him know I understood and relaxed into his embrace as he pointed at the group of cheerleaders. "They'll go next. You'll know when they're done 'cause they'll start the 'We Got Spirit' cheer. You know the one where we're supposed to out spirit them?"

The 'out spiriting' thing was definitely corny as hell, I turned slightly to look up at him, "Are we gonna out spirit them NB?"

He grinned at me, "Might as well, this is an important year for us isn't it?"

"It is?"

He nodded. "Yes ma'am. You're no longer a little girl but a young woman entering High School." He reached out and tucked my hair behind my ears. _He didn't think I was a little girl in the closet on my birthday. _I thought, quirking an eyebrow up at him. "And Soon I'll be a man, out to face the real world," he shook his head, "or so they say."

"Only according to Ed and Em not a," I used finger quotes, "real man…"

He raised an eyebrow at me, looking rather insulted. "Are you gonna make me tickle you?" I shook my head, but continued to stare at his face as he turned to look back at the coach. "Anyway... Once the cheerleaders are done, the band will play a stereotypical song, which is epic in its own right given it's context while they light the bonfire."

"And then... like people make out and stuff?"

He laughed at that, "Yeah, or drink and chase each other around." He shrugged. "Depends on what you want to do I guess."

I smirked, "which one are we gonna do?" I asked as I laced my fingers with his and pulled his hands into the sleeves of his hoodie to warm up his cold hands.

He rested his head on my shoulder. "I don't know Ali Cat."

"We could make out... I mean… it's no big deal right? It's not like we haven't done it before." I reasoned.

"True."

"And I know you like it when we do…"

"So do you," he defended.

"Never said I didn't," I said as I snuggled closer to him.

He gave me a rather wet kiss on my cheek, "I know."

"Unless you don't want to be seen making out with me…" I brought my knees up.

"What's that supposed to mean Alice?"

I shrugged, "I'm a Freshman...and you're cooler than me." He laughed at that, before I looked towards the ocean. "And I'm not all that pretty," I finished in a whisper.

He hugged me tighter. "You're very beautiful Alice," he told me, making me blush and smile, because _him_ saying that to me meant so much. "And you being a Freshman has nothing to do with anything. I'm not cooler either."

"Then what is it?" I asked.

"What do you mean?"

I shrugged, "Why don't you want to?"

Quickly, he pulled his hand out of my sleeve and turned my face to his, kissing me passionately, thrusting his tongue into my slightly open mouth and massaging my tongue with his. I moaned slightly at the kiss, he tasted like Jasper and peppermint and I couldn't get enough. We broke away and looked at each other for a minute as I moved into a better position. Then he grabbed my face and kissed me hard again, it was exhilarating because he seemed to not care who saw. I was kissing Jasper, who's a Senior and beautiful and a lot of girls wanted him, and he was here kissing me.

I tentatively put one hand on his shoulder and then the other loosely around his neck. He kissed me even harder, moving one of his hands down my back as the other wove itself in my hair. We stayed like that for a bit, occasionally mixing in a few smatterings of peck kisses in with all the frenching we were doing. A cool shiver went through me as his cold hands slid under the waistband of my shorts, then panties and he squeezed my bare butt cheeks rather forcefully.

He used his hands to pull me even closer to him and rubbed my crotch against his bulge making us both gasp a little at the friction. I could hear the roar of the crowd around us, but could care less; it was me, Jasper, our lips and his hands on my ass.

Then he moved his lips from mine, placing soft kisses on my cheek down to my neck, sucking and leaving wet kisses as he moved along my neck. I began moaning, rolling my hips against his. He moved his knees up behind me to support my back as his hands moved around to my front, making hasty work with the zipper of the hoodie before sliding his hands up under my shirt and bra, fondling me. I moaned louder under his touch, his greedy fingers tantalizing my nipples as he sucked and kissed along my jaw.

"Jasper," I finally managed to groan out, making him look up at me through hooded eyes for a minute before trapping my lips with his again. One of his eager hands moved out of my shirt to fist my hair, pushing me even closer to him as his other hand continued to knead and pinch the breast it held. Our hips continued their movement, dry humping in front of everyone and not caring. He moved his mouth from mine again to attack my ear and the territories that surrounded it, making me gasp and wrap my arms around him.

"Fuck, I love you so much N.B.," I purred huskily in his ear.

He pulled back, "Wait? What?"

I panted for a minute, trying to collect my thoughts, "Um... I love you?" He shook his head at me, which made me raise an eyebrow at him. "Why are you shaking your head at me?"

"Ali... you can't love me." _Oh my God, he did not just say that and pinch my nipple at the same time._ I scowled at him and pushed his hand roughly out of my shirt.

"Why can't I?"

"Alice, come on... we're just kids!" He tossed his hands in the air in frustration.

"What is that supposed to mean, Jasper?" I asked, my mouth hanging open slightly in shock.

"What? You know what I mean Alice. You have your whole life ahead of you and I'm leaving…" He shook his head stubbornly, putting his hands on my sides, "It's impossible."

I damned the fact that my tear ducts seemed so ready all the time, feeling the tears forming already. "Jasper... Why can't you just stay here with me? Please?"

"Alice…" He reached up, cupped my cheek in one of his hands and despite myself I gave in to the comfort a little, looking into his eyes, the sadness that was ever present beneath the veil now bubbling up to the surface. "I don't want to hurt you... I have to go to college Ali. I worked too hard to give it up."

"So... what? This is all I'm ever gonna be to you? The chick you sleep with in a non-sexual way every night and make out with when she pesters you enough about it?"

"No. Alice, I really do care about you," he rested his hand on my chest right above where my breaking heart lay.

"Then why can't you love me back?" I asked, my voice sounding tortured even to my own ears.

"Please don't do this Ali Cat," he whispered.

"Do what, Jasper Alexander?" I demanded, crossing my arms to gave him the hint the was not welcome to touch me.

"Trust me, it's safer for you not to love me. Now drop it." He said in a firm tone.

"Now drop it and let you feel me up some more?" I asked bitterly.

"NO!" He shouted, "Jesus, Alice, that's not what I mean!"

"Then fucking tell me what you mean!" I yelled back.

He groaned and fell back into the sand, "I can't love you Alice, I just can't," he said to the sky.

I glared at him for being such a coward that he couldn't even look at me when he said it, tears stinging my eyes. "Fine then." I stood up and moved to his side, where he raised himself up on his elbows. "Stay away from me, don't come in my window again, don't call me, don't email me, just…" I took a deep steadying breath, "forget I ever existed."

"Alice," he reached out for me, trying to get up as his eyes pleaded with me. "Please don't do this."

"I can't be friends with you like this, I'm in love with you Jasper... and I can't wait forever... Maybe…" I shook my head, "No. Just stay away Jasper." I turned away, determined to at least make it out of the parking lot before I broke down crying. It didn't work, I began running as fast as I could home, tears running down my cheeks.

I shook my head to rid myself of the memory before I looked at the clock. _Shit, I need to go to dinner with Garrett!_

I ran into the restaurant twenty minutes later, briefly pecking Garrett on the lips before sitting in my seat across from him. He chuckled lightly at me.

"All this wedding planning is getting you in a tizzy, eh?" He asked, smiling at me as the waiter brought me out a glass of water and a glass of Chardonnay.

"Oh," I breathed, smiling at my boyfriend of two years' beaming face. "Yeah, well, the best man flew in today, so that should make things a bit easier." I explained before taking a sip of water.

"I hope you don't mind, I took the liberty of ordering for you."

I smiled a little, _was I really that late?_ "It's fine," I assured him. We continued the polite conversation, with me hoping that he couldn't tell I was very distracted, barely touching the salmon and steamed vegetables he ordered me.

When dinner was over he ordered Blanc de Noir and then dropped to his knee at my side out of nowhere. "Alice?" I looked at him and made sure to swallow the last gulp of champagne as he pulled a silver box out from his pock and popped it open. I gasped when I saw what was inside. _Holy –_ "Will you marry me?" He finished.

I gaped at him for a minute, then realizing everyone was staring at us I quickly said yes and jumped into his arms. The entire restaurant seemed to burst into applause and congratulations for us. So why is it that even in this moment I couldn't stop thinking about Jasper?

We left the restaurant shortly after that, him explaining that he needed to get some work done so I couldn't really go to his place to celebrate, but I would be damned if I couldn't go out and celebrate my happiness, so I did the next best thing.

I pulled out my phone and scrolled quickly to my best friends name and listened to her pick up on the other end, "Bella?"

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**K: Oh yeah bitches! Guess who's got an A average before her final exam AND has two thumbs. Yep that would be me! *happy dance* So, to celebrate with me, we're giving you this EARLY. Don't you just love it when we're in a good mood? ;) And I bet y'all thought we weren't doing an A/N *Nelson laugh***

**Robs: Oh gosh! I can't believe the support and love we've gotten for this fic! Almost 100 reviews already! *hugs* We love you all so, SO much for this! Another Alice chapter... we do hope you enjo****yed it. **

**Questions? Concerns? Love it? Let us know in a review!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: All copyrights, trademarked items, or recognizable characters, plots, etc. mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization.**

**K**: Thank you for the congrats regarding my class. Glad to know y'all are cheering for me lol. Not much to say, so I hope you like Jasper's Chapter!

**Robs**: Well, y'all were certainly surprised and upset that Alice said yes, but don't worry all things get explained in due time and I would just like to point out that public proposals kinds back you into a corner... of course you're gonna say yes! LOL. Thanks to the usual suspects of readers, reviewers and rav girls!

**Happy Birthday Bev! You can thank her for getting this chapter early. ;)**

**Special thanks to Amber for betaing and loving this mess. ;)

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**JPOV:**

Edward dropped me off at the familiar beige, two story house in Forks. He offered to help with my things, but I just waved him off, telling him to give Bella and his folks my love. Which left me standing here, staring at the house.

Truth be told, it wasn't the house that made me leave, hell it wasn't even Alice or the town and it definitely wasn't my friends fault either. It was the lies, secrets and deception that lurked within the walls of the dwelling in front of me now.

Taking a deep breath, I started making my way to the porch. It was time to face my past, whether I was ready to or not. The department shrink said it would be good for me, but to not expect immediate results.

_But isn't it human nature to expect instant gratification? After all, the human race tends to act quite selfishly. We choose to surround ourselves with people who makes us happy; while we ridicule other's to make ourselves feel better, yet we don't see the wrong in doing so._

I shook my head at my thoughts, sometimes I surprise myself with the way my mind wanders.

"Well it's about time Jasper Alexander made his way back home." I heard a female voice say tartly from ahead of me. I looked up to see my very pregnant sister smiling at me.

"You cut your hair!" I laughed, ignoring her statement. She ran her hand through her shoulder length hair.

"Yeah I did," she said with a grimace. "Do me a favor, would you? If you ever get married, don't let your pregnant wife cut her hair. No matter how much she threatens to castrate you." I laughed as she waddled, _yes waddled_, closer to me. I set my bags down and carefully put the Tuxes over the banister.

"Now give your fat sister a hug!" Rose cried, flinging herself at me. I laughed and hugged her back.

"Seriously Rose, it's not like I haven't seen you in five years. And by the looks of things, since I last saw you, all the work you've been doing in the past two years has at least been productive." I teased. She just rolled her eyes and picked up the Tuxes.

"How'd it go?" She asked as she looked me over. "Jesus, did you have to look like a starving artist to see your true love for the first time in five years?"

It was my turn to roll my eyes as I picked up my bags. "Where are Greg and Brianna?" I asked as we stepped inside.

"Dad's at work and Mom said she forgot something at the store but she should be back shortly. And Em called, said he was coming straight from his shift." She explained as we headed up the stairs to my old room.

"Is he planning on intimidating me with his uniform?" I joked, tossing my bags on the bed. I looked around the room, it didn't seem like it had changed much.

"Probably not Jasper, he's just excited that you're here." She said as she laid the Tuxes flat on the bed. "We all missed you, you know." She gave me a sad smile.

"And you all moved on," I gave her a pointed look.

"Don't fault her for that. You had Kayla, Conty and Ms. Trailer Trash to keep you company at night. At least she's happy. Leave it at that."

I snorted, "Yeah happy with Gene."

"Garrett," Rose corrected.

"Can't I just call him Fuck Head?" I teased as I hung the Tuxes in the closet, not wanting to risk the wrath of Alice.

"No. As long as you're still with your skank, I don't want you making any moves on my girl. You got me?"

"I'm only here a week. I'm sure by the time I leave; I'll once again be a fading memory to Alice." Rose just shook her head and headed for the door.

"Keep telling yourself that Jazz. Maybe someday you'll believe it."

After a much needed shower and shave, I collapsed onto my old bed intending to take a nap. I knew my efforts would be futile seeing as I didn't take my Trazodone beforehand. I just laid there listening to the voices downstairs. They all sounded happy and seemed to be enjoying each other's company. At least until Brianna asked if I had made it back yet.

Deciding now would be a great time to make my appearance; I grabbed my glasses off the nightstand and headed towards the rest of the family.

I'm not sure what kind of reception I was expecting, but what I got was a bit unsettling. Greg was calling me 'son' and being joyful; while Brianna was… cordial, polite at least.

While I wasn't surprised to see Brianna with her best friend, a glass of Southern Comfort in her hand, I was surprised that she seemed interested in the life I had created for myself in Tennessee. It may be a little odd, but for the first time I can remember, I didn't feel like I was a burden in her eyes. Then again, it could just be my second beer making me feel like that.

Rose's random giggles at her phone was distracting and Emmett's side comments to her piqued my interest.

"What's got you giggling Rose?" I asked.

"Oh apparently there's a new hippie in town." She said with a smirk and a mischievous glimmer in her blue eyes.

"I thought I was supposed to be taking care of getting the Riff-Raff off the streets, how do I not know him?" Emmett interjected.

Rose snorted in laughter just as Brianna left to get dessert. "Oh but Honey, you know him well. I would say he's like a brother to you." She teased. Emmett just looked at her puzzled waiting for an explanation._ I was right there with him_.

She turned her attention to me. "So tell me Jazz, you still smoking the skunk weed?" She asked sweetly, causing me to choke on my beer. Greg laughed, claiming he knew I had some rebellion left in me.

Emmett, on the other hand, didn't look amused. He raised an eyebrow at his wife. "He's the hippie?" he asked. Rose smirked as she handed her phone over to him. I watched as he looked from her to the phone, then proceeded to laugh. Not just a giggle or a chuckle, but a snort followed by his booming laughter.

"Fuck you guys," I muttered as I finished off my drink. The one and only time I get stoned with that Jackass and it still haunts me to this day.

**~*~*~*~December 29****th**** 2001~*~*~*~**

"Alright, this moping over my sister shit has got to stop." Edward said, throwing the controller to his new Play Station 2 down. Emmett groaned as he turned off the game.

"Well, unless you have some magic potion I can use to stop being upset then you'll just have to deal with it." I rolled my eyes at him as I looked up at the ceiling.

"I don't have a potion, but I do have smoke," Emmett informed us. He and Ed were up and out the back door before I had a chance to say anything. I followed them and watched as Emmett sparked it up. He took two hits before passing it to Ed.

"So," Emmett stated as he held the smoke in his lungs. "You gonna try my magic bro?" He asked as he exhaled.

I normally didn't indulge in this type of activity like my two best friends seemed to enjoy. My type of drug was the kind you can buy out of the vending machines at school. Caffeine, simply the best there was, and legal at that.

"You don't have to worry about Mom and Dad. They're at a party, we'll be fine." Edward said, handing me the joint.

My eyes danced between Ed's face and his hand. I don't do this, this is kind of thing isn't the smartest choice available. Sure I was upset that Alice was still doing everything in her power to not talk to me, but did I really want to get stoned? Emmett smiled widely at me as my hand reached out for the joint. What's the worst that will happen?

_Alice will be pissed!_ I heard my subconscious yell at me. Well if it makes her talk to me, even if it's to call me an idiot, it's worth it.

Two hours and two joints later, it was safe to say I was completely stoned. The three of us managed to finish off a container of Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream in less than ten minutes and spent thirty minutes after the fact, laughing at Emmett as he rolled in the snow complaining of brain freeze.

"That would imply that you have one Em," Ed managed to say through his laughter. This of course set off another round of giggles.

"Wait! Dudes! I smell a dare!" Emmett shouted suddenly, as he sprang to his feet.

"Yes!" Edward cheered.

I sat on the edge of the trampoline and watched as Emmett's hazel eyes danced with excitement.

"Ed, we need three vases," he gave Edward a slap on the back and Ed nodded and hurried inside. "But not Esme's good shit because she'll kill Jazz if he breaks them!" He called after him.

"Wait, what?" I took my glasses off to clean them on my shirt.

"I'll explain when Eddie-boy returns."

"Why would Esme kill me?" I asked, trying to get more information out of him. He sighed dramatically.

"Fine, Pussy." I rolled my eyes at him, placing my glasses back on. "The dare, which you're gonna take, is for you to juggle three vases while using the trampoline."

"You do realize that I know how to juggle right?" I gave him a skeptical look.

"Duhhhh," he drawled out, "The challenge is whether or not you can do it on the trampoline."

"Alice, just go in and play with your dolls or something." Edward said as he was coming out with three vases. My head snapped in his direction, waiting eagerly to catch a glimpse of Alice.

Quickly Emmett filled Edward in on the objective. And, just like me, Edward questioned the odds since I was a juggler. I smirked at Emmett as he rolled his eyes. And to think they gave me crap for being the court jester at the Renaissance Fairs.

I saw Alice give me a look I wasn't familiar with from where she was standing by the sliding glass door. I smiled and looked back at the trampoline, from this angle I could see the spots that where iced over and figured it was best to stay in the middle where there was less chance of losing my footing.

"I'll do it." I told them as I rolled myself to the middle of the trampoline. Emmett clapped happily.

"This is gonna be sweet! Okay five dollars each for every minute you can do it – from the minute you get all three vases flying though." Emmett clarified as I started to get momentum in my jumps.

"Wanna toss them to me Ali Cat?" I asked Alice. Her eyes snapped to mine and I could see she wanted to say something but she merely rolled her eyes.

"No, Alice is going back inside." Edward said in his best protective voice.

She rolled her eyes again and sat on the patio chair. "I am staying Edward. It's best to have someone responsible to supervise."

Emmett snorted a laugh, "You got told off by a Freshman." He teased, earning Ed's true feeling about him with the flick of his finger.

"Fine, but you don't say shit to mom." Ed pointed at Alice to emphasize his point.

Again this was greeted by the roll of Alice's eyes. "As if," she said in a bored tone.

"Emmett, let's go!" I called out to get the attention off Alice.

Slowly Emmett started tossing the vases one by one. As soon as I got in a good enough rhythm with the two, the final one was tossed and flawlessly added to my show. I heard Emmett call out to Ed to keep track of the time as I tried to focus on what I was doing. Alice stood up, stretching her arms over her and I got a look at her shirt.

Written in bright yellow letters were the words 'I like to flash people' against her purple shirt. I started to laugh at the implications of her shirt and in turn, lost my focus.

I heard Alice scream and Emmett cuss before I realized what had happened. I looked down at my hands laughing. Somehow two of the vases had broken against each other and sliced the hell out of my hand.

"Dude, are you okay?" Edward asked as he and Emmett came closer to the trampoline. I kicked my legs out from under me to land on my ass. Luckily all the bouncing I was doing kicked off the extra broken glass that wasn't in my right hand.

"Yeah, it's only a flesh wound," I grinned at them.

"Fucker slices his hand and he quotes Monty Python," Emmett grumbled. I felt the trampoline shift on the left side. I looked to see Alice walking her way to me.

"Ali Cat don't… I don't want you to get cut." She reached across me and wrapped my hand in the bottom of her shirt. "Ali blood stains," I whined at her.

She looked at me but glanced away quickly. "Em, get me a towel," She called over her shoulder. I watched as he ran over to the storage cabinet where the Cullen's kept the towels for the hot tub.

"It's my shirt... why do you care?" Alice asked me softly. Like she had room to talk, she was the one that said she didn't want to be friends.

"Because, I know how you like your clothes," I said lamely. Her and Rose where the same when it came to fashion. They lived and breathed it, and honestly I didn't want her to blame me for ruining something else in her life.

Alice shrugged, "Whatever." I was going to say something to her but Emmett was taking her attention from me.

"Here Ali," Emmett said while handing her the towel. It was obvious that his high was gone as well.

"Thanks Em," she said while taking the towel from him. I watched her remove my hand from her shirt and wrap it in the towel, applying pressure to the gash. I bit my lip and hoped that no one heard the pathetic whimper I made.

"Shit! Edward we gotta call Dad." Alice called out to her brother.

"Is it that bad? I mean can't we just take him into the ER and not get Dad?" That my friends, is my normally cool and collected best friend in a panic over his dad finding out that we were smoking pot.

Alice rolled her eyes, "I guess we could. He's bleeding really badly. You guys are total idiots you know that?" Emmett shoved his hands in his pockets and looked down while Ed rubbed the back of his neck and shrugged.

I laughed, yes I laughed. After all, I wasn't big on doing the irresponsible thing and I did it, and now not only was Alice talking to me but she was caring about me too.

"Yes, but I'm forty dollars richer," I admitted, smirking at my friends who groaned.

Alice turned her attention to glare at me. "You are so stupid. Why the fuck – you know what, never mind."

I raised an eyebrow at her, "What Ali? Say it"

"Why did you do this? You are smart enough to know how stupid this is. Why?"

_Well let's see, there's the fact that it got you to talk to me. Uh, yeah, and I have enough money now to get you the tickets you wanted for your birthday. Oh and I'm fucked in the head because even though I see you as a friend, I really want to kiss you again like before._

_Wait where the hell did that come from?_

"Even smart people take risks Alice, it's quite enjoyable. You should try it you know."

She snarled at me some. "I took a risk. It got me nowhere."

"Well take another risk and talk to me, and not because you feel obligated too." I challenged while giving her a pointed look.

"It's pointless," she said while wrapping the towel around my hand tighter.

"Ow Damnit! Why is it pointless? I don't see why we can't be friends. It's not like I'm seeing anyone anyhow, I think you're just afraid to be seen hanging out with the psychotic nerd of Forks High, so you decide to use the 'I'm in love with you' card to scare me off." The moment the words came out of my mouth, I wanted to slap myself.

Her eyes began to fill with tears as she said in a deathly whisper, "Jasper Alexander Whitlock. I hate you". She dropped my hand and pulled herself off the trampoline. "Emmett he's yours, I need to get away from all the idiots before my IQ drops." She spat out as she headed back into the house.

"Just wait Ali Cat, one day we'll look back at this and laugh," I called out to her.

She stopped to turn back and look at me, "You keep thinking that." She spun around and headed back into the house.

_I will_.

"Wait, you dared him and he did it?" Rose asked incredulously. I blinked back into the present. I looked up from the scar on my right hand to see Rose staring at me in shock. Emmett nodded in response to her question.

"Why would you do that Jazz? You were the one that always gave us lectures on the dangers of drugs, unprotected sex, and hell, even kissing!"

"You do desperate things when the one you love isn't speaking to you." I stated. _Even if I was too scared to admit it then, I was in love with Alice._

Emmett snickered and jabbed his thumb at me. "_He_ gave you a talk about the dangers of unprotected sex?"

"Yes!" Rose laughed then looked at him. "Why?"

_Yeah, why was that so funny?_

He took a drink of his tea. "I just find that fairly ironic," he said, shrugging. I watched as he and Rose had a silent conversation with each other before her face showed recognition.

"Oh yeah…" she said softly then looked at me. "You're a walking contradiction you know that?"

I rolled my eyes. "Give it a rest Rosalie. I was a kid living on statistics at the time okay?"

"Says the boy who didn't put the love glove on," Emmett said into his drink. I just looked at him unsure of why he would say that to me.

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**End note: Heh, the boy who didn't put the love glove on says you need to review ;)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: All copyrights, trademarked items, or recognizable characters, plots, etc. mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization.**

**K**: Well hello there. So I'm a little perplexed. How does having only two friends make Jasper more popular than Alice? Trust me, there's a reason why he is Alice's 'Nerdy Boy'. ;-) Also, keep an eye out on both the Alsper blog and More Than Friends blog; we'll be posting a time line that will be filled in so y'all aren't too confused!

**Robs**: so here it is another Alice chapter, I hope it gives you some insight on her ;) and well you get to see the other girls too. Thank you to all our readers y'all really inspire us!

**Special thanks, as always, to our beautiful and wonderful friend and beta, Amber!**

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**APOV:**

"Hey Char?" Charlotte's big brown eyes looked up at me from where she was pinning the calf length hem of my Maid of Honor dress.

"Yeah Ali?" She was the only one of Jasper's friends that truly became mine after he left. She was awesome and probably one of my biggest supporters.

"Do you think…" I paused for a second as she continued fixing the hem. We were cutting it close and I knew it, _thank God for Charlotte,_ "marrying Garrett is the right thing?"

"Does he make you happy?" she asked from somewhere behind me.

"Yeah," I responded rather lamely.

"Then I say, do what makes you happy." She smiled up at me as she made her way back around me. I love how quick this lady does things. I was going to add something, but Rosalie interrupted us.

"Hey Ali do you think Bella would be pissed if I rolled down the aisle?" She wrinkled her nose at her reflection and the simple dress that had yet to be hemmed.

I rolled my eyes at her in the mirror, "Shut up… you are a beautiful, glowing pregnant woman."

"And only you get to tell me that," she informed me, smiling.

I grinned like a fool back, "Yeah."

"So... You really think my brother looks like a hippie?" She asked me, turning this way and that looking at herself in the mirror.

"Your brother?" Charlotte asked, clearly shocked.

I shifted uncomfortably in my spot, "Yeah, Jasper's back Char." Rose made some comment under her breath about him coming back for Ed, but not her, his own family.

"Holy fuck... call Peter and tell him to make sure Porky hasn't suddenly sprouted wings?" Porky was their pet Pot Belly Pig. I couldn't help but laugh at the comment; she was just as shocked by Jasper's arrival as we all were.

Rosalie joined in on our laughter, "Or call Satan to make sure Hell hasn't frozen over." That made me laugh even harder, trying desperately not to poke myself with one of the hundreds of pins that Charlotte placed to hold the hem the right way.

After we all calmed down Charlotte finally asked, "Are you okay with the fact he's back?"

"Why shouldn't I be?" I shrugged as Rosalie moved to sit in a chair.

"Gee I don't know... he has a way of making you get so wrapped up in him that it crushes your heart when he freaks out?" She gave me a rather pointed look making me look down at my feet. _She had a point there._

"Is that why you're questioning Garrett, Ali?" Charlotte asked, knowing my past with Jasper, and the way I dealt with things whenever a Jasper related kink got thrown into the mix.

"What about Garrett?" Bella asked, poking her head out of the dressing room door and looking at us. "By the way Alice, you were right; this dress makes the girls look bigger."

"I'm always right," I told her, grinning.

"Ali wants to know if marrying Garrett is the right thing." Charlotte answered for me.

"Traitor," I scowled at her.

"Wait, what? When did this happen?" Rosalie asked, obviously confused about me and Garrett getting married.

Bella came out of the dressing room in her beautiful gown. _Oh my Lord, Charlotte really can work wonders_, I thought as I looked at it. "She can't wait forever you know?" Bella shrugged at her sister-in-law.

"Garrett asked me two night ago Rosie, don't tell the guys though... don't want it getting back to everyone till we announce it," I explained to Rosalie.

"The night Jazz got to town, Garrett suddenly wants more of a commitment?" Rose asked, and Bella shot her a warning look. _What the fuck is that about?_

I shrugged, "Yeah."

"Oh don't give me that look Bella, ya'll are thinkin' it too." Rosalie chastised Bella and Bella smacked her lightly on the arm.

"I, for one, am happy for Alice. Garrett loves her and she loves him." She smiled warmly at me, I smiled back.

"Rosie?" I asked after a few minutes of silence.

"If you want to clean up after a man for the rest of your natural life, go for it," she smiled knowingly. I knew she still held some kind of hope in her heart that Jasper and I would end up together, so tossing things like that at me was only a reflex response. "You know I want you happy Alice."

"Well maybe Alice will get lucky and Garrett will be anal about cleanliness..." Bella laughed, trying to be Miss Optimism.

"Nope, that's only Edward dear. He's the only anal man," Rose snickered as Bella blushed. _What the hell was she talking about? Edward could barely figure out how to open the dishwasher back in the day, when had he turned into a neat freak?_

"What are you two hookers not tellin' me?" I asked, but Charlotte interrupted me by having me take off the dress and asking Rose to come up on the podium next as she laid the dress carefully next to one of her many sewing machines.

Rosalie laughed at my question as she pushed herself out of the chair and climbed up on to the podium. "Well it seems that the fair Swan is no longer a virgin in any form," she smirked at her sister-in-law, making Bella turn even redder. Wait, Bella hadn't been a virgin for awhile…

After pulling my sweats on I gave her an eyebrow, "Bella?" she chewed her lip and shrugged in response. _Oh my God they hadn't!_ "That is rather disturbing…" I informed her as I sat down in the chair Rosalie had recently vacated.

Bella laughed, "That's why I didn't tell you... 'cause, I mean it is Edward and all. Fucking hell Hale you have a big mouth."

Rosalie smirked, "It's Hale-Swan get it right sis." She stuck her tongue out at Bella playfully.

I laughed at them, "Aw, I wish we could all be related too!"

My comment seemed to bother Bella and Rosalie a little bit and they exchanged a look. Bella hugged me around the shoulders. "We are silly 'cause I'm going to be your sister, which makes Em your brother, so you get Rose by default." She grinned at me.

"Screw you cow. If anything, she's getting Emmett by default." Rosalie responded making me laugh once again.

"Can I just ask something Rosie?"

"Of course Ali"

"When did Jasper become such a man-whore?" I asked her timidly, it was something I had been wondering for awhile now.

She began fidgeting with her wedding band which she had hanging from a chain around her neck, "Um, I don't know that he is Ali. I think he's just trying to find himself?"

I raised a speculative eyebrow at that, "Between some chicks thighs?" I asked sardonically.

"Did you expect him to _not_ be with someone?" She asked me, raising her own well groomed eyebrow.

I sighed as I pulled my feet up in front of me on the chair, "I don't even know what I did wrong…"

"Who said you did something wrong? We all know Jazz was a little off." Bella shrugged.

"I'm sure it wasn't you Alice. Just trust me 'kay?" Rosalie tried to reassure me.

I sighed again, laying my cheek on my knees, "I mean, he seemed so happy at prom…"

***~*~*~*April 22****nd**** 2005*~*~*~***

I sized myself up in the mirrors on my closet door. I have to admit, I looked pretty damn good.

_Prom dress that shows off my legs, shoulders and cleavage I know Jasper loves so much, two hundred fifty nine dollars._ _Six inch platform heels to make me tall enough to dance with my beloved properly, one hundred twenty five dollars. Hotel room at the plush hotel_ _where prom is being held, four hundred seventy five dollars. The look on Jasper's face when he_ _sees me in nothing but the new lace panties I bought, priceless. _

I heard a knock and looked up to see Edward standing there, looking all spiffy in his suit. I smiled at him. "You look nice."

"You look beautiful," he kissed the top of my head as I smiled back at him in the mirror. "So, how long are you and Jazz gonna pretend that you aren't together around me?"

I gaped at him, "Um… I dunno, please don't kick Jasper's ass..." I pleaded with my big brother who laughed at me.

"Don't worry, I see how happy you both are together, and who am I to get in the way of that?" He smirked at me in the mirror, Bella had definitely softened him. I turned to hug him.

"Thanks Ed."

"No problem," he said, patting my back. "Anyway, he's downstairs waiting for you." I squeaked a little in spite of myself and ran down the stairs, noticing him leaning against the banister.

I slowed, trying to play it cool as I walked down the rest of the stairs, he looked up at me and smiled. "Wow... you look beautiful Ali Cat."

I felt the heat rise to my face, "Really?"

"Of course, I'm honored to be your date." He took my hand and kissed the back of it. I smiled stupidly and sighed, staring at him like a love-sick puppy.

"I wanna take a few pictures… is that okay with you Jazz honey?" Mom asked from beside us.

"Yes ma'am. Oh wait, I got you a corsage," he leaned down, picking up the plastic box holding the small flower. "Rose told me blue and this was the best I could do," he explained giving me a shy smile.

"It's beautiful NB." I held out my wrist and he slid it on, my mother snapped pictures as he did.

"I still say you're prettier," he told me, kissing my cheek.

My mom beamed at us, "Okay, just a few of you together and then a few of Alice alone alright?" she asked, we nodded and she began telling us where and how to stand. "Alright, thanks kids... have fun." I waved back and led Jasper out the door.

"Night Mrs. Cullen," Jasper waved as I pulled him out the door.

Once outside I pulled a condom and a handkerchief out of my purse and watched as a smirk crossed his face. "Much cooler than a boutonnière don't yah think?"

"Or do you just want to make the other guys jealous 'cause you're mine," he wrapped his arms around me loosely as I tucked the handkerchief on top of the condom in the breast pocket of his suit.

"I got us a room."

"Good girl... I lied by the way... you're fucking hot in that dress." He grinned down at me, biting his lip.

"If you think that's hot, you should see my panties," I said with a wink.

"Can I have a sneak peek in the limo?" He waggled eyebrows as he walked me towards the waiting limo.

"I dunno…" I giggled, "shouldn't we wait a bit?"

He groaned, pulled me up at his side. "You're killing me Ali Cat... killing me," he kissed me firmly.

"Fine just a few peeks... keep your hands to yourself though," I smirked, knowing there was no way in hell he would keep his hands to himself.

"I make no promises," he winked again.

"You are so bad…" I giggled, kissing him again.

"You like it," he teased as he held the door open for me. I bit my lip and climbed in, being none too lady like while I made sure he could get his first sneak peek under my skirt. He gave me a rather lusty look as he followed me in.

I sat across from Jasper and watched as he closed the door. "Where to first?"

He raised an eyebrow at me, "I believe we're supposed to get Ed and Bella," he shrugged. "I honestly don't remember 'cause now I can't get someone's panties out of my mind," he smirked.

"Well, considering Ed hasn't even left the house yet… we might be waiting a while at Chief Swans…" I spread my legs a little, knowing he was looking down there.

He gave me a seductive smile, "Get over here." I grinned and moved to sit next to him, "That's better."

He cupped my face and kissed me gently at first, then roughly, pushing me firmly against the leather of the seat as his tongue probed my mouth. He pulled me down, laying us on the seat as we continued to kiss, one arm wrapped around me and his other hand exploring my body greedily. It slipped down the top of my strapless gown, groping me and pinching my nipple between his forefinger and thumb.

I gasped as he continued playing with my nipple and moving his mouth along my neck, his warm wet breath making my insides quiver in delight. I felt the limo begin moving making his body shift and letting his engorged member rub up against my upper thigh as he continued teasing my boob.

He moved his hand out of the top of my dress and moved down my body. "Are you excited Ali Cat?" I moaned lightly as his fingertips brushed up my thigh and nodded when I realized what he was about to do. He plunged a finger inside of me and I gripped his arm tightly, moaning as my hips bucked into his hand. I heard him mumble something into my neck, but I was too far gone to care what he said.

My mind went blissfully blank as my orgasm swept through my body and I relaxed onto the seat, removing myself from his arm so he could wipe his hand off on the handkerchief I gave him.

_I knew it would come in handy._

After we picked up Edward and Bella, we were on our way to the diner to have dinner. Jasper graciously paid for my meal and then we went to the dance.

Once at the dance, we went and had the professional portraits done before making our way to the dance floor, dancing to slow songs whenever they came on and hanging out and talk to my friends. For some odd reason it seemed as if Jasper was getting sadder as the night carried on, and it concerned me. During our next slow dance I ran my fingers through his hair, trying to comfort him. "Nerdy boy…?"

"Hmm?" He looked down into my eyes.

"Are you having fun?"

He loosened his tie a little with one hand and nodded, "Are you?"

"Only because you're here, thank you for giving me my fairytale Jasper…"

He smiled affectionately. "Of course Alice," he said before leaning down and kissing my lips softly.

"You look so hot tonight," I complimented him, making him smirk.

"That's just cause I have the hottest chick at Forks High in my arms," he pulled me a little closer.

"I love you NB." I told him, but he, in response kissed my temple. _What the fuck?_ I looked into his eyes, to see that his feelings for me hadn't changed, so I decided to try a different tactic to cheer him up. I stood up on my toes, leaned in close to his ear and whispered, "Make love to me tonight?"

When I looked back at him, he was chewing his lip and nodding, but not making eye contact. _Seriously, what the fuck?_ I forced Jasper's head to look in my direction, the sadness he usually kept locked up was so close to the surface. "What's wrong Jasper?"

He smiled at me, putting his mask on again. "Nothing… just thinking."

"About what?" I pressed.

"Nothing." He shook his head before looking over my shoulder. "Hey why don't you go dance with Angela. She looks lonely." He nodded his head slightly in Angela's direction.

"You don't want to dance with me NB?" I asked, using the full power of the pout on him.

He pulled me closer still, so that our legs were intertwined as we moved in a slow and graceful circle. "I do Ali Cat."

"You've been pulling away from me tonight." I told him, expressing my concern.

His beautiful eyes met mine again, "I'm sorry... I didn't know I was." I moved my hands from his hair to run my fingertips along his cheeks, making him smile at me.

"You make me happy NB."

"Good, I'm glad I'm doing something right." I didn't really understand what he meant by that comment, all I knew was for the first time in six months he hadn't done two things in a row. He hadn't told me I love you back and he also hadn't expressed his happiness with me either. I looked at the ground, trying to will the tears back.

"Hey," I felt his finger lifting my chin. "You should hold you head up high you know why?"

"Why?"

"Because you're beautiful, in love and loved in return." He gave me a shy little smile and I breathed a small sigh of relief, he does love me.

"Yeah, but shush... you don't want my boyfriend to find out," I teased, winking at him.

He laughed, "I'll break his nose if he gets in the way," he informed me, kissing me passionately.

If I had known that was going to be our last kiss, I would've kissed him a little longer.

* * *

_**Have any prom/wedding/shopping moments with your friends that were fun or memorable? Share 'em with us, and of course, let us know what you think! ;)**_


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: All copyrights, trademarked items, or recognizable characters, plots, etc. mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization.**

**K: Quick note from me. I know I said to keep an eye out for the time line, and I promise it'll be up soon. Fricken finals this week again… *dies***

**Robs: I'm amazed about all y'allz feelings about this fic! We promise all will be revealed in due time... and Jasper will redeem himself... soon ;) **

**As always thanks to Amber the Amazing for her betawork. **

**~*~*~*~*~

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**JPOV:**

I pulled my bike into the driveway at Rose and Emmett's place. They had a nice house on the outskirts of Seattle. Not too big, but not too small for their growing family. One look at the driveway told me I was in for more than just the three of us hanging out.

I took my helmet off and ran my hand through my hair. It was nice to take my bike out for a spin again. I missed the feeling of freedom and speed on the open road I get when I ride. I was also very thankful Rose kept it hidden in the garage at Greg and Brianna's for me.

I knocked once on the door and when it opened, I was greeted by Edward's smiling face; he already looked a little wasted.

"You better slow down buddy, I think Bella would kill me if you were completely trashed tomorrow." I teased.

"I ain't drunk man!" he said joyfully as he clapped me on the shoulder. "Come on in!"

"Alright," I laughed, following him inside. I could hear the evidence that the party was already in full swing. Granted it was a small gathering of Edward's friends, but the majority of us were a loud bunch.

"Jazz!" Shouted a stumbling body. I got a better look and realized it was our friend Peter Reynolds.

"Holy shit! Peter!" I laughed as he stumbled over to me trying to give me a hug. Peter was a member of the high school news production crew with me. One of the few outside friends we adopted into the circle. "What the hell are you drinking man?"

Peter looked into his glass. "I dunno," he slurred before taking another sip, "but it tastes good," He smiled then looked up at me. "Want some?"

I laughed. "No, I'm good thanks."

"Hey Sam, how about you take Peter to the basement..." Emmett called from somewhere within the house.

A tan skinned man walked up and put his hand on Peter's shoulder, prompting Peter to offer him his drink. "Okay," he said over his shoulder in Emmett's direction. Sam nodded a smiling hello to me as he passed by.

"Jazz this is Sam; he's one of Bella and Em's family friends." Edward said, introducing us.

"Oh, hey nice to meet you," I said as we shook hands before Sam lead Peter downstairs.

Emmett wrapped his arm around my shoulder. "So what will you be havin' my friend?" he asked. He lived for playing the host at any party. Hence the reason why we were having Edward's last night of freedom at Emmett's house rather than in some hotel room; although, knowing my sister, she was probably restricting the party to the lower two floors.

"Beer is fine, Em." I said as I set my helmet down on the couch.

"Beer it is!"

We walked into the kitchen where I recognized the faces of Seth and Jake. _Jesus, Seth grew up_. There was one face I didn't recognize, he was about Edward's height, with blond hair about the same length as mine, only straighter and he was dressed as if he had just stepped out of a corporate meeting.

"You know Alice?" The stranger asked Seth and Jake, piquing my curiosity.

Both Seth and Jake nodded. "Since birth, we used to all play in the mud together and what not." Seth clarified.

"You the guy then?" Jake asked the stranger.

"Yep," he said popping the p like some goddamned girl. I gave Emmett a nod as he handed me a beer and I leaned against the counter next to Ed. _So this the Armani Prick_. "She's quite the little hottie eh?" he continued, waggling his eyebrows as he drank out of his bottle.

I growled slightly at the fucker and Edward scowled at him. "That's my sister..."

"And she's my... girlfriend," the prick-face answered with a smirk.

"Hey Seth, Jake," I said with a nod a slight smile, trying to ease tension in the room. _Or was it just like that because I want to break this dude's nose?_

"Hey Jazz!" Seth said as he gave me a one armed hug.

Jake nodded his head. "Jazz," he said with a smile. It didn't escape my notice that the Garrett guy was sizing me up as he drank his beer.

"Sorry," I said, being polite as I held my hand out to him. "I'm Jasper, and you are…?"

_The dick-face who will never make Alice moan like I can._

_Wow, where did that come from?_

He took my hand in his, shaking it firmly. "Garrett Nash."

"Pleasure," I lied as I resumed my position, holding the counter up with Edward before looking over at Jake. "Dude! Where's your girl? I half expected her to be here since last I heard you two were attached at the hip or some shit."

"Leah is hangin' with the ladies tonight." Jake explained.

I snorted before taking a drink. "Her and Rose get along now?" _That's a first_.

Jake chuckled and shook his head. "No, they still got the 'who's the top bitch' thing going... though Leah is trying to be nice because Rose is pregnant."

"Which I appreciate," Emmett added.

I laughed, "Oh come on Em, you know you like a feisty Rose."

"Yeah in bed," Seth teased, shooting the bird at Em. I just shook my head and laughed at them as Ed and Emmett joined in the laughter. I caught what's his face glaring at me, but I chose to ignore him.

"So what are we doing for the Bachelor Party?" Seth asked as he took a drink. I smirked slightly, you could tell he was eager to get the party started.

I raised an eyebrow at Emmett as Garrett rolled eyes. _Who the fuck does this guy think he is?_ I asked Emmett silently.

Emmett shrugged his shoulders before clearing his throat. "Bella made the strictest request..."

"Damn! Does that mean I've got to call the strippers and cancel?" I teased in a whiny voice. The guys laughed knowing that I never did call them. Bella and Rose both bitched me out, making sure I knew there would be no strippers.

"What she don't know won't hurt her, " Edward joked. Emmett just raised an eyebrow at Edward.

"Y'all aren't gonna have strippers? That's lame." Garrett said in a condescending voice. I just rolled my eyes at the douche-bag as I took another drink. _He clearly missed the memo that we weren't sexual deviants_.

"Why do you care? You have my sister," Edward snapped at him. _Yeah fucker._

"Same to you Eddiekins," Emmett teased.

"I'm going to have strippers at my bachelor party," Garrett said with a confident nod.

Jake and Seth looked at each other and shrugged.

"Bella thinks that sometimes the strippers give the bachelors sexual favors." Emmett clarified.

Garrett smirked, "That's the best part." Edward growled at that, shoving himself off the counter slightly, but Jake and I grabbed his shoulders pulling him back. Truth be told, if he wasn't expected at the church tomorrow, I would have let him at it.

"Dude, chill. Fuck, I was joking." Garrett snickered.

Emmett shook his head and I smirked. Rule number one when dealing with Edward Cullen; do _not_ talk shit, i.e.: implying you were using his sister. Even being considered his brother won't save your ass.

"Anyway," I interjected. "Knowing our Bella, strippers were first on her long list of no's." Emmett nodded in agreement.

"What else," Edward said, smirking at me. "Knowing Bella, what was on her list of no's, Jay-action?" I smiled a little at the nickname that I had earned no thanks to Emmett not knowing how to knock.

Garrett rolled his eyes again and I flipped him off mentally, remembering the little surprise we had planned for Edward. "Oh shit! Em, did Rose put the surprise in the closet for Ed?" Emmett grinned wickedly as he went to the closet.

"Ha, knowing your girl man, anything that involved females, getting too trashed and allowing you to leave the state. Although I think she said something about penguins being okay." I teased him. Edward's face went pale at the mention of penguins as the rest of the guys looked at us in question.

Emmett returned with a blow-up penguin, complete with a bikini similar to what Bella wore on their first trip to the beach together and a wig matching Bella's hair color."We warned you that your 'Think of the Penguins speech' would come back to bite you in the ass someday didn't we?" I chuckled.

"What about penguins?" Seth asked as Emmett handed Edward his bedmate for the night.

"You want to tell the story there pretty boy?" I pointed at Edward before finishing off my beer.

Edward was wide eyed and shook his head at me. Finally, I was able to embarrass him.

"Well, Seth... this man here," I said, putting an arm on Edwards shoulder, "was trying to convince Bella that they needed to run away for a year. She suggested Antarctica..." I laughed and shook my head, clearly seeing the conversation play out in front of my eyes as if it had just happened. "Em, cover your ears." I teased.

Emmett shook his head laughing, no doubt he'd already heard this story before, but he covered his ears anyway.

"He says, 'Nooo think of the penguins!', and when Ali Cat asked him to elaborate." I explained, laughing at Edward rolling his eyes at me. "He went off on this rant about how he and Bella would corrupt the penguins nightly." I turned my attention to Edward. "Just how much did you smoke that night?"

He laughed and held his fingers as close as possible without touching, indicating a tiny amount.

At this point most of the guys were laughing. Edward punched me playfully and flipped me off.

"And to think...you bust kids for that shit now." Jake said, cracking up. I laughed and nodded in agreement with Jake. It was funny that the two biggest pot head in Forks were now cops.

"Who's Ali Cat?" Garrett asked, making my smile falter some. No one but me called her that.

"Alice," I said, looking at him.

"My Alice?" He asked.

_Mine!_ Something inside of me snarled, but I merely nodded once.

Edward rolled his eyes at him. "Yeah, Alice and Jasper here go back pretty far, didn't you know?"

Garrett rolled his eyes back at him. "Like I could forget." He spat as he went to leave the kitchen. _Well that was good to know, the only question is who told him?_ "Where the fuck are we having this stag party?"

"In the basement." Emmett said, just as Seth and Jake followed Garrett.

Emmett, Edward and I stayed behind. "Since when did Armani include sticks to shove up your ass?" I whispered to Edward.

"Fucking trust fund baby," Edward snickered.

"God love him, 'cause we know I don't." I said, rolling my eyes. _Seriously what the hell did Ali Cat see in that prick?_

Edward shrugged, "I don't see what Alice sees in him." _From your mouth to God's ears dude._

"Really good looks?" Emmett offered, causing Edward to give him a 'what the fuck' look. "What? Rosie even said he was hot."

I patted Emmett's shoulder trying my best to keep a straight face. "And she married you, just saying."

"Fuck you... at least I've never had to handcuff a chick to have my way with her." Emmett shot back, making Edward stop in his tracks and look at me.

I glared at Emmett. "Dude!"

"Who needs porn with you around?" Emmett asked, taking a drink. "Just sayin'."

"I'm gonna pretend I ain't hearing shit." Edward said, shaking his head as we started to descend the stairs to the basement.

"Fuck you man," I shot back. "It was consensual. I didn't force shit on her. And to be honest if I was a chick, I'd rather see your mug every morning then his." I glared at Emmett, "Feel better?"

Edward looked at me wide eyed. _Shit._ "Dude... what type of kinky shit did you do with my sister?" he asked.

Emmett snickered. "Much." I reached around Edward to smack Emmett upside the back of his head. "Ow bitch!" he said, smacking me back.

"You like it pussy," I teased.

"That is so not the way you treat someone who..." His eyes went wide as if he realized he was saying too much. "Um never mind." he finished, taking a chug of his drink.

"Who what Em?" I asked.

"Now I know how you managed to knock her up." Garrett said suddenly, shaking his head.

_Where the fuck did he come…WHAT?_

"Alright that is enough out of you asshole." Emmett boomed at him.

"Sit in the comfy armchair before I call Alice to escort your ass out of here." Edward said, pointing at an arm chair.

"What? I was just saying it was no wonder. Fuck, I wasn't saying anything untrue." Garrett said as he sat in the chair.

_Wasn't true? Fuck you dude!_

"Jazz, you okay man?" Emmett asked.

"What the fuck is he rambling about?"

Ed raised an eyebrow. "This so wasn't the way she wanted you to find out."

"Find. Out. What?" I was done with them beating around the bush on this.

"About-six-months-after-you-left-Alice-had-a-baby." Emmett said in a rush.

I laughed slightly. "Okay. It just sounded like you're trying to tell me that Alice had a baby. Which can't be true 'cause that would mean I'm dad, which isn't possible 'cause we were careful every goddamn..." _Oh fuck…_ I felt my eyes widen as I realized we weren't so safe when we were runaways.

"You sure there slick?" Emmett asked. I punched him hard in the arm on reflex. Of course the big mother fucker didn't even flinch, and my hand fucking hurt now.

"Why the fuck did you punch me?" _Oh like you felt it!_

"Well it was the wall or Ed, and seeing as how I'm sure the future Mrs. Cullen would notice a mark on her husband's arm... you were in the way. Sorry. FUCK! That asshole knew before me?" I snarled in Garrett's direction.

I'll admit, not the best reaction to finding out that you have a child that you didn't know about. But come-the-fuck-on, how is it fair that Mister Trust Fund-Stick up his ass-Douche-bag knew before me?

"Asshole has a name," Garrett said in a sing song voice as he held his beer, smiling at me.

I felt Emmett's hand on my shoulder as a low growl erupted from my chest. "Dude... she had no idea how to tell you." He tried to explain.

"It's obvious if you've seen her naked." Garrett said in a bored tone.

_Pain, I want to cause him lots of fucking pain. Right. The. Fuck. Now!_

"Shut the fuck up. You. Are. Not. Helping." Edward snapped at Garrett.

"I need to get the fuck away from him 'cause I swear to Christ if he insults my Ali- Ali Cat one more fucking time..." I whispered harshly to Edward and Emmett.

Emmett grabbed my arms and started dragging me back up the stairs. "Ed, get the movies started... I'll talk to Jazz since..." he said over his shoulder, shrugging.

I shook my arm out of Emmett's iron grip as I took the steps two at a time. "What the fuck man? You were at my fucking house and you knew! Yet you and fucking Rose said nothing?" My voice exposing every ounce of betrayal I felt at the moment.

"I was fucking sworn to secrecy. She knew you wanted your freedom and didn't want to trap you!" He shouted as we got back in the kitchen.

I hit my head against the counter. "Fuck. She shouldn't have done it alone Em. I should have been there!"

"I think that was her whole point bro," he said, leaning on the counter and looking at me sadly.

"What, to prove that I was an asshole? I already knew that Emmett."

"No, she didn't really want anyone to know..." he sighed. "She and Rosie went to UCLA and tried to hide the whole thing, but then she went into labor early..."

I hit my head on the counter again. "Thank God she had Rosie... God, I fucked up royally."

"You're not the only one, be pissed at me okay dude?" _What the fuck did that mean?_ "It's not Rosie's fault... but Ali was crying for us to tell you, but we figured there was no way you'd get there in time so we called Esme."

_She wanted me there?_ I felt my heart crumble, thinking of Alice alone, scared and in pain.

"Why didn't you call me then?" I asked him. "I would have gotten on the first flight out here."

Emmett diverted his gaze to the floor. "I was passed out..."

I snorted despite myself. "What?"

"You know, I looked down and ... well yeah, I saw something no man should ever have to see. When I woke up, I asked Alice if she wanted me to call you, but she told me no because it was pointless."

"Oh," I said lamely as I stood up straight. I ran a hand through my hair tugging on it slightly. "Is that prick at least good to my kid?"

Emmett shrugged. _How the fuck did he not know?_ "He hasn't met him," he explained before sighing. "Alice gave him up for adoption... but she still gets pictures."

"Oh..."

He shrugged and I could see the conflict he felt inside surfacing. "Hence why she said it was pointless... I'm sorry for not calling you dude, it's been hard not telling you, but you have to understand..."

I nodded. "I understand..." And I did. Emmett was torn between two people that he saw as family. How the hell is he supposed to choose sides? "I just... fuck. I just wish I could go back and do all this over you know?"

He nodded, tossing his empty bottle in a bin. "Me too..." he said, grabbing two cold beers out of the fridge. "He's adorable though... Rosie has a picture... want to see?"

I just chewed my lip and shrugged, unsure whether I should take the chance and see my son now or wait for Alice to tell me about him. But, who's to say she will ever tell me? I'm the one that left her, evidently when she needed me the most.

_No wonder she wanted to be with Garrett_.

Emmett held his finger up and left the kitchen. I popped open my beer and flung my cap into the trash. I needed to fix things with Alice, but how the fuck do I do that in a week?

"Ali doesn't give out newer ones," Emmett said as he came back into the kitchen handing me a picture. "Those are hers, you know?"

I nodded as I looked at the picture. God, it was a beautiful baby. His cheeks were rosey, he had bright blue eyes and blond hair. Something was so familiar about the picture. "Ryan?" I asked, looking up at Emmett. He raised an eyebrow in response. "Holy fuck."

"What?"

"Alice sent me this picture." I remembered now. It came with a pocket watch she sent me for my birthday. No note or anything. Just a simple package with the watch and the picture. "It had his name and time and date of birth on the back." I explained to Emmett. "How big he was but I thought it was Rose's cousin or something..." I looked back at the photo, it all made sense now. That was her way of telling me. "He has Ali's nose..." I said sadly, wishing I'd never left.

Emmett nodded in agreement. "He looks a lot like you too..." he trailed off and looked off as if lost in thought before he grimaced. "You didn't knock her up during handcuff playtime, right?"

I shook my head as I gave a little snort. "No..." I handed him the picture back. "I think it was when we ran away."

Emmett nodded, understanding what I meant. "That was a good thing for the two of you... whether you want to admit it or not..."

"Things were simpler then weren't they?" I asked before taking a long pull of my bottle.

"Yeah they were..." He nodded taking a drink. "But you both came back so... different," he said scoffing slightly.

"How do you mean?"

"Well, think back to when you two first started hooking up..." he said with a smirk. "Then when you guys came back it was crazy, all you had to do was look at each other to communicate."

I nodded and smiled slightly. He was right. Before we ran away we had so many misunderstandings, like we couldn't communicate with each other. Basically, we and had no idea what the fuck we were doing, but while we were on our big adventure something just clicked for us and we became… bonded in a sense.

"Shit... you came a long way from seven minutes in heaven," he said, shrugging.

**~*~*~*~*~February 18th 2001~*~*~*~*~**

I don't know why I was surprised that Rosalie had rigged this up in our favor. The minute she started talking about playing Seven Minutes in Heaven, I saw the scheming look in her eyes. I'll never understand how she talked Alice into waiting until last to go but she did.

_That's why Alice is currently blindfolded and standing in the walk-in closet in the basement._

Rose walked me to the closet as the others separated to do their own thing. "Now, I had it rigged. Your name was never an option for the other girls and when Alice picked, she was only going to get you, thanks to a little switch. I'll try to distract Ed but you got seven minutes," she explained as she opened the door to the closet.

Alice was standing there, her back pressed against the back wall as she chewed on her lip nervously. I felt bad for her that she felt that way at her own party. Leave it to my sister to find the most uncomfortable situation to put her friend into.

"Remember… No telling her who you are, the blindfold stays on and no means no." Rose stated, for appearances I assumed and held her hand out to me expectantly. When I didn't respond to her she muttered glasses and I removed them and handed them to her. "Have fun!" she added in a sing song voice and waited until I was close enough to Alice to smell the citrus of her shampoo. Once the door closed I waited a few moments before speaking.

"It's me Ali Cat," I said softly as my eyes adjusted to the darkness. I gently brushed the back of my fingers along her cheek. She smiled at my touch and I could tell she had relaxed. "I'm gonna take the blindfold off okay?" I asked her.

"Yeah," she said softly. I reached behind her head and carefully undid the knot tied into the scarf. Her big blue eyes looked up at me.

I smiled down at her. "I'm gonna pick you up okay?" She bit her lips and nodded, wrapping her arms around my neck and jumping into my arms. I pinned her against the wall with my body as her legs locked behind me. "Relax," I told her as I moved closer to her. I watched as her eyes fluttered closed, anticipating my next move.

I brought my lips to hers, gently sucking her upper lip into my mouth as she did the same to my bottom one. My tongue brushed against her lips, tasting the caramel apple flavor lip gloss on her lips as they parted for me.

My hand grazed the skin of her side as I slid it up from her hip. Her hands grabbed at my hair, pulling me closer to her as our kiss deepened. I slowly slid us down along the wall, coming to a stop when my knees hit the floor. I started to trail kisses from her lips down her throat. She moaned and wiggled against me, her center creating friction on my aroused cock. I moaned against her neck making her freeze.

"Sorry," she squeaked. I looked up at her, grateful that it was dark and she couldn't see me blushing.

"It's okay Ali Cat," I responded, surprised at the sound of my own voice, deeper than normal.

She pressed her lips to mine again, the force of it knocking me back. I grabbed her hips, at first with the intention of holding her in place, but I liked the feel of her moving on me way too much to stop it.

This time she took control, her hands finding their way up my shirt as she kissed from my stomach up. I closed my eyes enjoying the feel of her lips on my skin combined with the friction created as her hips rocked against mine.

_Holy fuck, I think we're dry humping_!

I cupped her face in my hands, bringing her back to my face where I kissed her hard. I kissed her with more passion then I had ever done before, capturing her moan into my mouth. _Now I understood what the guys were talking about. Once you hear how much the girl likes what you're doing to her, the more determined you become._

And with that thought, I rolled us, pinning her beneath me. Again I trailed kisses along her jaw and throat, working my way up to her earlobe as my hand slid under her top. Slowly I inched my hand up, anticipating her stopping me, but she never did. I felt the fabric of her bra, definitely not the cotton I knew she typically wore. I cupped her breast in my hand as sucked her earlobe into my mouth, nibbling on it slightly. She made mewling noise and pushed her chest into me. I felt her hands drag along my back, her nails making me shiver in pleasure.

I pulled away and smirked at her slightly. She watched me as I pulled the hem of her shirt up exposing her stomach to me. I leaned down kissing her stomach and dragging my tongue along her skin. She giggled at first, but relaxed the more I went up. Her giggles turned into little noises of pleasure by the time I reached her bra.

Definitely not the Hello Kitty bra I was expecting. Instead I was now, face to… bra, the turquoise lace staring back at me. I pulled her shirt over my head, making her laugh before I pulled the top of the cup down and licked her nipple.

"Jasper!" she squeaked out. I waited, expecting her to stop me but she didn't, so I did it again, this time slowly dragging my tongue around it in a circle. She made a strange grunting sound at that.

The thing is; I never heard the door open... So when the sound of Edward saying our seven minutes was up ten minutes ago registered in my brain, I froze.

"Get your head out of my sister's shirt and join the rest of the party please," he said calmly, but I knew I was in for it.

I shook my head, trying to clear the memory and looked in the direction of Edward, who was laughing at the movie we were watching. He looked up at me and gave me a slight nod before returning his attention to the screen.

It was then that I realized he would only kick my ass for hurting Alice, not for loving her.

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End note: Have y'all figured it all out yet? Theories? Guesses? Straws? Bueller? Review please :-*


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: All copyrights, trademarked items, or recognizable characters, plots, etc. mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization.**

**K: **Stag parties, guys love them… most women fear them. So looks as if everyone survived Edward's last night as freedom (unfortunately lol)… Also Linkin Park witfit… was not these two. js

**Robs: **What K said, also thanks to the normal peeps and everyone who has been pimping us out! WE LOVE YOU!

Special thanks to Amber who is the best beta in the whole world!

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**APOV:**

Charlotte was a Godsend. Truly, she was. She got Rosalie's and my gown, plus the alterations to Bella's dress done on time. Jonathan, despite my doubts, showed up early to do our hair and made each of us look beautiful. Bella, however, looked radiant. I could tell she was nervous about the wedding, about how she looked, about… well, everything. So I did my best to calm her down while the guys took care of getting everyone seated and doing all the menial tasks.

I still hadn't really seen Jasper since the first day, and really… I don't think I wanted to. Especially not after accepting my proposal from Garrett, getting rip-roaring drunk with Bella and spilling the beans about Jasper's and my sordid history. She couldn't believe all the little kinks Jasper had, agreeing with me that it was always the quiet ones. I felt a little guilty about telling her, but I knew she'd never tell a soul and honestly, it felt great to finally tell someone.

Now, disturbed by this knowledge, I would say something and Bella would instantly look at me and giggle like mad. That was until we played one of Rosalie's games of truth or dare at the bachelorette party last night. Now it was me and Rosalie who got to look at Bella and snicker. _Girl is way too truthful when she's drunk._

We got ourselves situated and the wedding began- big shocker here- on time. Rosalie walked out first, gliding sweetly towards the pastor and her place. Then it was my turn; _step, together, step_, I thought as I walked with my eyes directed ahead.

_Don't look at him_, I chanted repeatedly in my mind. Which worked great until Garrett caught my attention and I smiled at his beaming face. I knew he would think I was really beautiful all done up like this. Then when I turned my eyes back ahead of me, I saw him.

_Oh my, Jasper, he looks really good_.

_Haircut, not too short, but short enough to deal with the crazy ass hippie hair he had going on, check, the slightest hint of scruff, check, a fucking pressed three-piece-suit, fucking check_. I lifted my eyes back up his hard lean body dressed to the nines in black back to his beautiful steel colored eyes, only to see the expression on his face. He was looking at me, the left corner of his mouth turned up slightly and his eyes filled with adoration. I swallowed hard. _Jesus Alice, get a hold of yourself. You're engaged and Jasper didn't want you, remember?_

I steadied my nerves and turned my eyes back to my brother, who was smirking at me. I smirked a little back at him as I made my way up the two stairs to stand in front of Rosalie, turning to look back at Bella just as she entered.

I smiled at my best friend as Charlie walked her down the aisle, she looked anxious to get to my brother, a wide grin crossing her face. I glanced over at Garrett. He looked so handsome, and he was smiling just like everyone else had been. I saw him shift his eyes to me and grin, I, of course, grinned back.

Charlie gave his blessings on the union and then took his seat with Renee and Phil, Bella and Emmett's step dad. They looked overjoyed, Renee hiding her grin behind a tissue. Those of us in the wedding party turned so that we were looking at the bride and groom and I locked eyes with Jasper, he looked stunned before I dropped my head slightly so I wouldn't meet his eyes again.

The ceremony continued on, I listened distractedly as my brother and my best friend said their vows. I was so happy for them I felt like I might burst, but then again, some little part of me ached too. I tried desperately not to let that part of me come out. It had to stay hidden. It was better for everyone if that part of me stayed hidden.

However, it was hard to hide as long as he continued to stare at me. I could feel his eyes, watching my every move. It was both flattering and uncomfortable. One side was elated Jaspers giving me his attention again, while the other side was worried about what Garrett would think.

I took deep breaths as I willed this torture to end, listening as they exchanged rings and after a long passage was read, kissed. I clapped happily for my brother and new sister-in-law, whistling as they kissed each other passionately.

They began the procession and I walked with my eyes downcast towards Jasper. He held out his arm for me and we walked together behind Edward and Bella towards the double doors as everyone around us stood and waited for us. I didn't even look at Garrett as we passed him, afraid of the look that would be on his face.

I continued to walk with Jasper, feeling like it was the most natural thing in the world. As we exited the chapel, Jasper shifted himself to place his hand gently on my lower back with one hand and grab the swinging door with the other. "You look b-b-beautiful," he stuttered out quietly as he did so.

I looked up at him finally, his grey eyes shining with… hope? I cocked my head to the side and studied him for a minute. "Thank you," I whispered.

"No need to thank me Ali Cat, I'm just stating the facts." He gave me a small smile.

I gave him a nod, "Well, thank you for stating them. Even if…" I stopped myself and shook my head of any questions I had for him, "never mind"

He leaned closer to me, a spicy citrus scent wafted gently in my direction. "Never let anyone tell you otherwise Alice."

I looked deep into those grey eyes of his, "I've changed a lot Jasper." He raised an eyebrow, but gave me no indication that he intended to speak further. I looked away from him, if he really thought I was so beautiful, he wouldn't have left me.

"We all change, Alice. Some of us even change for the better. Just believe me when I say you're beautiful, okay?" he told me. I looked back up at him, to see him glaring at me, frozen in spot. You don't want to start a fight here Alice.

"Sissy!" A whirl of brown, cream and white hugged me so hard; the force nearly knocked me on my ass.

She pulled back and I grinned at her enthusiasm. "You are a dork. Just so you know."

She grinned right back, "Yes I am. Oh my God, I'm married!" She gave a small squeal of excitement.

"Congrats Bella," Jasper nodded politely in my new sister-in-laws direction before heading over to where his friends were, a few feet away.

"Congrats Honey Bee!"

"Thanks Ali!" I smiled uneasily at Jasper's back.

Bella tilted her head, "What did he do Alz?"

"He said I look beautiful and should never let anyone tell me differently." I whispered.

She gave me a big hug before whispering in my ear, "Well he's right. You are."

"If I'm so beautiful then why the fuck did he leave me?" I hissed, unable to hold it in any longer.

"I don't think it was your beauty that made him leave Alz! He was a messed up kid from what Ed and Em told me. And if you want answers you'll have to take it up with him. He's really the only one who can tell you what he was thinking that day."

I shook my head, embarrassed at my actions on my best friend's wedding day. "No, I'm sorry Bells," I sighed. "It's too late; we've both moved on, it won't do anything if I ask. It won't change anything."

She raised an eyebrow at me, "Who are you and what have you done with my sister?"

"I'm a grown woman," I smirked, "Sister."

"Then act like, and in the words of Rose, 'Man up and grow a pair.'" Bella told me firmly.

"Not. Talking. To. Him. About. It."

Bella smirked. "We'll see," she raised an eyebrow at me and I rolled my eyes in response.

My brother cleared his throat from a few feet away, "We need to take pictures?"

"It's called closure. I saw the way you to looked at each other. It's. Not. Over." Bella whispered before turning her pearly whites on to me. "Yes, we do."

"Oh trust me it is!" I hissed. Bella didn't respond, instead she merely flipped me off. I scowled knowing that was Bella's way of saying 'shut the fuck up I'm right you're wrong', I stood to her left and tried my hardest to smile.

"Geez Alice, can you fake it any harder?" Emmett teased, Rosalie snorting at her husband's comment.

"I never fake it Em, I leave that to my two best girls here," I patted Bella and Rosalie's arms, making Bella look at me in shock and Rosalie laugh.

"Whore don't you give away my secrets." Rosalie quipped, still laughing. I glanced over at Jasper who was looking at the ground smiling. _Damn I did not mean to boost that man-whore's ego._

"Okay I lied, we've all faked it." I lied while laughing.

Rosalie quickly turned her eyes to Jasper, "Burn!"

"I never," Bella stuttered towards Edward, blushing.

"Please...Bella, just because he's standing here doesn't make it true. I know you faked it with Edward at least once just like I did with Jasper." Bella shook her head vigorously at Edward. _Fucking liar,_ _she totally spilled last night._

Jasper leaned towards me behind my brothers back. "Well I know it wasn't fake on your seventeenth birthday," he said quietly.

"How do you know that?" I asked, he smirked at me before he lifted his hand and wiggled his fingers at me.

"Oh. My. God." I heard Rosalie say behind me.

I felt my jaw slacken as I realized what he was talking about. "Jasper!" I hissed.

"Alice!" he hissed back playfully, in a rather girly sounding voice. I noticed that everyone around us seemed to be smirking at each other. _What the fuck is going on?_

"Man oh man... We haven't all been together since... When?" Emmett asked, his laugh booming off the surrounding mountains.

"Men in Tights!" Bella and Rosalie squealed, laughing quickly afterwards.

***~*~*~*February 14****th**** 2004*~*~*~***

"Get your ass down here Alice!" I heard Rosalie's voice call from downstairs. Today was my seventeenth birthday, and frankly, I didn't really feel like celebrating.

Not that I was sick, or that I was unpopular, or anything along those lines. Just, four years ago I had my first kiss with Jasper, three years ago my first make-out with him, two years ago he took me to a concert and gave me my second hickey. Then last year, we didn't kiss at all until we became friends with benefits about four months ago.

Yes, I was having sex with my best friend, who I was completely in love with, and all I ever felt like I would be to him is a nice pair of legs and tits. So today, instead of trying to hang out with him - which would most likely end up with me either on top of, under, or in some other position with him buried inside of me - I decided I was going to stay in bed.

"Don't make us come up there!" Rosalie yelled once again. I sighed, giving up as I threw the blanket off my head and began trudging down the stairs, my blanket still in hand, til I reached the bottom of the stairs to glare at one of my best friends. "Ew, Alice, did you at least brush your teeth?"

I scowled at her, "Yes, I brushed my teeth."

She grinned at me. "Good!" she exclaimed, grabbing my hand and dragging me down to the basement TV room. Once we were halfway down the stairs Rosalie let go of my hand and ran over to Emmett's lap, sitting quickly and peppering his face with kisses.

_Gag me._

I continued down the stairs noticing that everyone, save for one person, was sitting in couples. Angela and Ben were sitting together, leaning against the sectional sofa; Emmett and Rosalie were in one corner, making out, while my brother was leaning against Bella's legs gently massaging her foot.

There were a few more couples around, but I didn't really care, because the minute my eyes left Bella I saw _him_. Jasper, and he was looking at me, but he didn't make any effort to move. I looked him over to see if there was anything evident that I could tease him about, but his Ghostbusters tee-shirt and jeans combo left nothing open. So instead I made my way over to him, stepping over people as I went and then plopped down on top of him, making him release an 'oof,' on impact.

"Oh yay, you brought a blanket." He teased as he grabbed me and the blanket all in one arm.

"It's so I can sleep if I choose to."

"Are you feeling okay?" he asked, looking worried and putting his wrist against my forehead.

"I'm fine N.B.," I told him quietly.

He wrapped both his arms around me, under the blanket. "You're sure?"

I sighed happily; saddest thing in the world is that being in his arms feels so right, no matter what kind of mood I am in it always cheers me up. "Yeah, just thinking a lot." I told him.

"Care to share?" he asked, raising an eyebrow at me.

I shrugged, "It doesn't seem like my birthday should be a big deal…"

"Of course it is. We all celebrate the day you were brought into the world." He placed a kiss on the top of my head, "I for one, am very grateful that you're here."

"Only 'cause of my tits and legs," I mumbled.

"No Alice, not just for that. I care about you and you're my best friend. Those things are just perks?" he said in the form of a question, I didn't nod or shake my head. Instead I studied his face, trying to see if he had any feelings he was hiding from me. No such luck. I decided to get a little more comfortable, moving myself around Jasper's side and curling a leg and an arm around him while resting my head on his shoulder. "Happy birthday Ali Cat," he pulled me closer.

"Thanks N.B.," I whispered. "At least Rose hasn't thought of a way to get us locked up in a closet to make out or something." I mused.

"No, but if you're feeling up to it I have a plan for us later." I could hear the smile in his voice as I felt him adjust just as I looked up to see him prop his head up on his arm.

"What kinds of plans?"

"Just something special for my someone special," he told me in a sing-song voice. _AH! He thinks I'm his someone special._ I buried my face in his chest to hide the grin that there was no way in hell I could hide. "Like I said if you want," I felt his fingers slid up under the side of my shirt, grazing the skin of my ribcage with his fingertips.

"Yes. I mean... yeah, it's cool with me." _World's biggest idiot, table of one_.

The corner of his mouth turned up into a smile as he told me, "It's a date then." _A date. A real fucking date with Jasper Whitlock._ I did everything in my power not to squeal out-loud, but my entire body was shaking with excitement. _Fuck yes, motherfucking fuck yes._ I heard Jasper chuckle at my reaction bringing me back down a little. _Jesus Alice, why can't you act more mature?_

Jasper and I continued to cuddle under my blanket, mainly because I was wearing a short and tank combo and was freezing my ass off and also because it gave Jasper some coverage as he touched me. His fingers running lightly across my thigh, my arm, my side. It seemed as though he couldn't help but touch me, like stopping would be next to impossible.

The first movie Rosalie put in was Princess Bride, knowing it was among my favorites - mainly because Jasper likes to whisper all of Westley's lines into my ear while the movie is playing. He continued his little tradition, whispering so lovingly into my ear, and even though I knew it wasn't true, the things he was saying, it was nice to imagine him loving me.

After that Rosalie put in How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, which in the end we were all laughing at. Then came the horror flicks, not my personal fave, but I didn't complain. Well, at least until they tried to play Gothica. Jasper hates that movie and I could feel him tense up next to me, so I used my veto power to override everyone wanting to watch it.

After that we watched Men in Tights; a classic amongst our group of friends, we all sat together, repeating the lines. Everyone except Jasper that is. I wondered for a minute what exactly he was doing until I felt his fingers slide between the elastic of my shorts and the skin of my ass. His hand continued its journey south and I thought he was just going to knead my ass until, "Oh." I gasped, everyone looked over at me and I felt my face get extremely hot.

"Sorry I just told her about something I discovered in my bio lab," he lied, very obviously trying not to laugh at my embarrassment. The explanation worked though because they went back to watching the movie. I reached over and pinched his nipple through his shirt, making him laugh and say, "Ow," all at the same time.

"Warn me before you stick your finger in my twat." I hissed quietly at him.

He began pulling his finger out, "Do you want me to stop?" he asked, thrusting it back deep inside of me. I buried my face into his neck to hide the moan.

"No."

I felt a kiss on my ear. "Didn't think so." he said pumping his finger in and out of me furiously as I pinched his nipple again, this time twisting and making him growl.

"Shut up N.B., you know you like it." I told him; before I moved my mouth to his neck, sucking and biting down to help keep my own sounds quiet and virtually non-existent as he slowly teased my core, bringing me closer to the edge.

He continued pumping his fingers into me as he grabbed my hand and put it on his bulging crotch to make me rub up and down his length a few times then leaving my hand to make its own pace. I looked up at his face, he was biting his lip hard and his half-lidded eyes glazed over. He began matching my pace and inserted a second finger, making it really hard for me not to groan.

We continued our slow steady movements, trying not to catch the attention of the rest of the group, but to be honest doing this, and the fact we could get caught only made it that much hotter. I picked up speed which made him pump into me faster, I was biting my lip and pushing my hips back onto him, feeling the pleasure begin to cloud my judgment, my thoughts, and my mind. Until it exploded, making my body tense and stop, his fingers deep inside me as I flat-lined for a minute.

_Holy fucking Christ I love orgasms._ I opened my eyes and looked up to see Jasper smirking oh so seductively at me before pulling his hand away from my crotch and sucking on the fingers that were in me a few moments before.

He smirked at me as he said, "Surprise."

I giggled, "Was that supposed to be my birthday present?" I asked in a hushed tone.

"One of several," he informed me before kissing me quickly and quietly.

"N.B.…" I purred, curling up closer to his side. Half of me held out the misguided hope that Jasper would want me to be his girlfriend as he cuddled me back. After all we did act like a couple, so maybe this was a step in the right direction, maybe he would want more with me.

After the movie was finished Rosalie informed both my parents and I that I was spending the night with her and Bella since Charlie was going to be out of town and then they left. I looked at them oddly and then just shrugged. I loved spending time with them so it really didn't make a difference to me. Once they were gone Jasper began talking to my parents, he was standing very straight and his arms were locked at the hands behind his back so I knew it was best not to interrupt what looked like an important conversation. Then he came back to me, "Esme and Carlisle say it's okay for me to take you on a date."

We went to his house first where he ran in to get a picnic basket, sleeping bags, cooler, and long rectangular, silver and pink wrapped box. He began driving once again, the direction we were going I knew we were headed towards the Kalaloch beach. A beach we didn't go to often, but they had campgrounds and it was close enough to Forks that it wasn't a big deal to go there but far enough away that we didn't have to worry about people showing up.

Once we got to a campground he began setting things up, while I sat on the hitch of the SUV, curled up in one of the thermal blankets he kept in the back watching him. He set up a fire, and poured soup into a pot to heat over it, then he used the lid of the cast iron pot as a griddle and made grilled cheese sandwiches.

I don't know what I am so amazed about, he was a boy scout after all.

Once he was finished he grabbed the cooler, the picnic basket, and my hand and led me over by the fire, serving me dinner first then serving himself. We spent the whole time smiling occasionally at each other as we ate. I was bouncing a little in happiness; any guy can take you out to a dinner and a movie as a first date. Jasper made me dinner and took me to the beach.

Once we were finished eating, Jasper cleaned up the plates and everything and returned them to their place in a hidden compartment in his SUV. Then he cleared his throat and opened the cooler, handing me a glass bottle with red liquid inside. "Strawberry daiquiri… trying to get me drunk N.B.?" I asked as I took a sip off of my drink.

He gave me a wry smile, "Maybe."

"You don't have to get me drunk to get laid you know," I teased, nudging him and smiling.

"I know, but seeing as it's your seventeenth birthday," he shrugged. "I figured you'd like a daiquiri."

I snickered, "Thanks N.B."

"You're welcome," he stated. I didn't know what else to say so I just chewed my lip and took another pull off my drink. Focusing on the ocean as the sun went down beyond the horizon until I heard him clear his throat. "So I've been thinking... you know about us, and I was wondering if you wanted to be my girlfriend?" I looked over at him shocked to see he was chewing his lip rather nervously.

"Say that again?" I whispered, afraid I'd imagined what he had said.

He looked over at me rather nervously. "Do you want to be my girlfriend?"

"Is that why you were trying to get me drunk?"

He laughed nervously. "Yeah, 'cause I mean I know I'm not the best looking guy or whatever but... Yeah."

_Did he actually think that?_ Looking back on it and all his actions the past few months while we were messing around it certainly seemed that way. I scooted closer to him, "I think you're the best looking guy I've ever seen." I placed a gentle kiss on the corner of his mouth. "Are you sure you want little ol' me to be your girlfriend?" I asked, biting my lip in anticipation.

"The best things come in little packages Ali Cat," he informed me giving me a shy smile.

"I've always wanted to be your girl, Jasper." I whispered, afraid that my voice would give me away.

"Really? You always wanted the nerd huh?"

I shook my head; I couldn't believe how low he thought of himself. Jasper was sexier than fuck and smart as hell. "I've always wanted you." I told him. He must've liked my logic because he quickly moved closer to me and pressed his lips urgently to mine, a quick and desperate peck that left me wanting more. "So... I'm your girlfriend... as in…"

"As in... date nights... flowers, cheesy love notes…" he smirked as I grinned so hard I could swear my face was going to break. "And other things."_ Fuck yes_. I grinned even harder and kissed him hard. "So is that a yes?" he asked, raising an eyebrow at me.

"Yes," I nodded.

"Okay then…" He grabbed my hand and laced his fingers with mine before gently tugging me closer to him and kissing me, letting his tongue slip between my parted lips and playing with mine.

We continued to kiss like that for a few minutes, neither of us really moving to make the kiss hotter or pulling away to make it tamer. "Jasper?" I mumbled against his lips, making him pull away slightly.

"Yes, Alice?"

"Can I say something without you freaking out... 'cause it's a really cold night to be left here all alone." He raised an eyebrow but didn't open his mouth to say anything, instead he just nodded. "I love you." I mumbled.

"We'll see if you still feel that way in a week," he teased, smiling gently down at me.

I raised an eyebrow at him, "What?"

He shrugged, "I might be bad at this whole boyfriend thing…" he pulled me into his lap.

"N.B... you sure you wanna be my boyfriend?" I asked, wrapping my arms around his neck.

He tilted his head to look up at me, "Why do you doubt that I do?"

"'Cause... I mean…" I let out a heavy sigh, "You have college girls and they're prettier, more mature, more... everything." I shrugged. "And I'm just Alice."

"I think you're more than they will ever be Ali Cat." I looked down at the small space between us and shrugged, _I wish_. He lifted my chin to look into my eyes before I could wallow too much. "I want you Alice. Please don't doubt that."

"I want you too…" I whispered.

"You sure?" He looked at me speculatively.

"How can you doubt it?"

"You seem hesitant, almost… scared?" His eyebrows furrowed.

"You never wanted me before Jasper... I just don't want to get hurt," I explained, putting my heart out there a little more.

"I have... I just…" He shrugged, like it was supposed to answer all the questions of the universe.

I chewed my lip, _should I demand that he explain?_ "Can I have my presents now?" I asked instead.

He nodded, "You may have one now."

"Which one?"

"The box I know you were eyeballin' the whole way here," he said in a steady voice. _Yes!_ I squealed a little and clapped my hands excitedly; Jasper always gets me what I want. He smiled at me. "Are you gonna let me up to get it?" he asked, making me wiggled quickly off his lap so he could. He laughed as he got up and ran to the SUV, getting the present from the back seat, then coming back and handing it to me, settling down in the sand so he was next to me again. "I hope you like it," he said. I carefully unwrapped it and pulled up the lid of the box, revealing a pretty pale blue sweater with butterflies embroidered on it, it was the sweater I wanted last week at the mall. I hugged it and kissed his cheek, making him smile. "I know you said you wanted it," he said.

"Thank you N.B.. You're so good to me."

"Flattery will get you everywhere Ali Cat," he mused, smirking at me and making me giggle.

"When do I get my next gift?" I asked, knowing already what that gift was going to be, and as slutty as it sounds I was excited for it.

"Depends... You ready for bed?" he asked, waggling his eyebrows suggestively.

I shook my head to say no then said, "Yes." Just to tease him a little.

He grabbed my hoodie and pulled me back onto his lap. "Or we can wait a little and watch the stars…"

"We can't do both?" I asked, wrapping my arms around his neck once again.

"Yes we can," he smirked.

I grinned back at him, "I want that then."

He peppered my lips with kisses, saying, 'as you wish', in between each one. Then he did something he had never done with me before, he gently ran his lips against mine, a caress with his lips. I felt the love, urgent and unbridled, but still calm and patient, like he could kiss me like that forever.

I heard the sound of the zipper, then felt the cool air nip at my arms as he took my hoodie off before pulling me flush with his body and probed deeper into my mouth. I used my hands to unzip and push off his hoodie.

He pulled away, "Hold that thought," he told me before he pushed me off his lap and ran over and fixed up the sleeping bag, which looked like two that were zipped together, and unzipped one side. He came back over to me and after taking my hand walked me back. We sat in the center of the folded back sleeping bag and continued kissing and stripping each other of our clothing.

That was the first time we made love.

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_End note: Send us some love! Review please!_


	9. Chapter 9

_**Disclaimer: All copyrights, trademarked items, or recognizable characters, plots, etc. mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization.**_

Robs-Isn't here right now, but if you leave a message she'll get back to you after the beep. *beeeeep*

K: O_O oh shit look who's holding down the fort…. CRAP! Anyway enjoy this early treat. ;)

_**Special thanks to Amber as always for being our fantastic friend and beta. We love yah girlie. **_

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**JPOV:**

After all the pictures, the receiving line and other formalities, everyone wandered off in various directions. I watched as Alice went to him. She looked so happy and downright beautiful, it made me feel sick.

Jealously makes you do silly things. That's why I wandered over to the bar and ordered a black barrel on the rocks. I don't typically do scotch but I needed to suppress the urge to inflict pain on Alice's date.

I sat at the bar and watched as Bella and Edward made their rounds to their guests, laughing with and hugging people. I was genuinely happy for them, don't get me wrong. In fact, the love and happiness that they had for one another just seemed to permeate the air, infecting everyone around them. Me included, at least until I looked in Alice's direction.

I knew they would be starting the traditional dances as well as a surprise dance for the females of the bridal party shortly, but I was content to sit here and nurse my drink. I wasn't afraid to dance with Alice, not in the slightest. In fact I was anxious to show her that I was more confident in my waltz skills then I was the last time we danced.

The thing that was scaring the shit out of me about dancing was Emmett's hair brain schemed to make Bella laugh, shut his wife up and impress Alice. I still couldn't believe Edward agreed to Emmett's dumb idea but he did. Now, I just had to do my best not to screw up the moves.

I saw Emmett wave me over, signaling that Bella and Edward were getting ready for their first dance as the new Mr. and Mrs. Cullen. I walked over to him and Rose and was immediately pulled into a hug.

"Scotch huh?" Rose said, taking a whiff of my drink. "Alice scare you that much?" she teased.

"No just the crap Emmett is going to make me do, now that scares me." I lamented. Rose raised an eyebrow and I just shook my head at her as I took a sip from the glass. The DJ did his speech and I watched as Edward escorted Bella to the dance floor that was put out for the reception. I had to give Alice credit for turning the meadow where Edward proposed into something out of a fairytale. The twinkling lights and candles gave the intimate party of thirty a romantic feel.

The mini orchestra started playing a song I recognized as Bella's song. Edward, in one of his more head-over-heels-in-love moods, spent all day at his piano writing a song just for his love. Each of us guys had our own hobbies that we used to impress our girls. Edward's was music and the song they were dancing to was proof of that. Emmett was excellent at working with wood and made Rose a very ornate jewelry box, which from what I'm told held her engagement ring. While I did photography, not as exciting as composing musical pieces or creating precious keepsakes, but at the time, documenting every second Alice and I were together seemed to be enough for her.

The final chords of the song came to an end, Edward taking advantage of it and dipping his bride before giving her a kiss. Rose and I both did a loud whistle as Emmett groaned. I had to laugh that even now, he still didn't appreciate seeing his baby sister being physical with Edward.

The DJ called us out to the floor and instructed the girls to have a seat. Emmett and I joined Edward and stood waiting for the music to start.

"Don't forget the hat trick!" Emmett hissed as he handed us our fedoras. I glared at him. I can't believe he was worried about some dance hat trick when I was feeling like I was going to puke.

I looked back at the girls, who were now sitting two feet in front of us. Bella tilted her head at Edward, not sure what he was about to do while Rose laughed.

"Dude! You told Rose?" I hissed at Emmett around Edward's back. Emmett just shrugged.

"Focus Jazz!" Edward hissed. _Ha! He was nervous too_. I looked over at Alice who crossed her leg over her knee and raised an eyebrow. _I can do this, _I repeated in my head as I put the fedora on. I couldn't help but smirk and wink at Alice when she bit into her bottom lip, blushing at my action.

The DJ made the announcement that the groom and his boys had a surprise for their special ladies, and it was the first time in five years I found myself blushing like I was in high school again. He started the song track and I tried my best to focus on what the choreographer Robyn had showed us, all the while keeping my eyes locked on Alice and praying I didn't fuck up or look as nervous as I felt.

I could see that Rose was getting a kick out of watching Emmett move gracefully, something he apparently didn't do at his own wedding, and saw Bella and Alice clapping along to the beat. But I knew Alice's eyes were trained on my face.

Halfway through the song, with a flick of our wrists, our hats rolled down our arm to our hand then we fluidly placed them back onto our heads. By this time, everyone was clapping along and cheering as my confidence boosted.

But then it came to the part that freaked me out the most. The slide. Robyn had worked so hard to get us to slide with enough momentum that we would make our marks and not run into the girls, and when the time hit, the three of us slid onto our knees, coming to a complete stop mere inches from the girls.

People applauded as we pulled ourselves up. Edward gave us both a hug and laughed that we were able to pull it off before he walked off the dance floor with Bella. Emmett gave me a slap on the back, teasing me about how much of a girl I had been about having to do it.

"Well, I unlike you and Ed, only had five days to get that down." I shot back laughing. Alice eyed me skeptically but didn't say anything. When Rose asked her what she thought she smirked at me before laughing with Rose.

_I guess that's a good thing._

I started to head back to where the bridal party was supposed to sit, leaving the tux coat at my chair when the DJ announced that the wedding party was going to do their dance with the bride and groom. Sure I knew this was coming, but it didn't make it any easier.

I met Alice in the center of the dance floor, where the rest were waiting, ready to start dancing. She gave me a tight smile before slipping her hand into mine and placing her other one on my shoulder. The band started playing a song that was very familiar to both Alice and I. It was played slower then I remembered but the memories linked to the song were still just as strong as I remembered.

This was awkward. She was looking down, while I tried to look anywhere but at her. Yet the electricity that always flowed between us was stronger than ever.

I wanted to talk to her, ask her how she's been. Ask her about Ryan, so many different things but it was like my jaw was frozen shut. So instead I held her and danced, wishing that I could take back the last five years. Maybe if I did, this would be our wedding that we were dancing at.

Just before the song ended I spun her around like I used to do when we were younger, and was rewarded with a beautiful smile and her musical laugh. It pulled at my heart but made me feel that much better.

But as with all good things, that moment came to an end with the final notes of the song. Alice said a quick 'thank you', before going back to her date. I, in turn, went to my seat and quickly finished off the remainder of my drink.

I took my empty glass to the bar to get a refill and decided to stay there. My presence wasn't required any longer. I watched as everyone took pictures together, laughed and danced. Never before had I felt more like the outcast as I did at this moment. Maybe it was the scotch that was making me feel this way, but either way, I was glad that I would be going back to Tennessee soon.

The scotch wasn't working fast enough, unfortunately, and rather than being the bigger man about things and walk away, I forced myself to watch as Alice danced with him. I watched as she laughed and smiled, holding him tight and looked happy.

I wanted her to be happy, but I wanted it to be with me.

***~*~*~*~January 20th, 2002*~*~*~*~***

The door closed with a soft click, but I didn't let go of the knob. I pressed my forehead to the door as the warm tears that I was trying to fight back fell.

"Fucking moron," I muttered silently, trying my hardest not to go back in there and tell her she's wrong. Felix isn't the one she should be with, it's me.

I heard her painful sob and I gripped the knob harder, my heart willing my body to move but my brain screaming at me not to.

_You're distancing yourself to save her,_ I tried to reason with myself. _But you're hurting her more Jasper,_ a voice that sounded like my mom, retorted.

Either way Alice is going to get hurt. At least this way I can protect her still.

"I'm sorry Alice," I whispered as I wiped the tears from my face.

"Oh Jasper, there you are." I heard Edward say from the stairs. I turned my head slightly to look at him. He stopped about a foot from me.

"The movie's ready, Em's down in the basement…" He pinched the bridge of his nose. "You two still fighting?"

I pushed myself from the door and shrugged. "It's not really a fight," I gave him a tight lipped smile. "It doesn't matter any how, it's over."

Edward raised his eyebrow at me in question and I shook my head.

"I can't give her what she wants, so I have to give up right? Listen I know I was going to stay here, but I think it would be best if I went home."

Edward nodded. I knew he knew what I was thinking. It was just to hard to be here when Alice is so mad at me. All I want to do is hold her and tell her that I loved her, but I couldn't.

"Well, no problem. We'll get ya on the way. Take it easy." Edward said, slapping me on the back as we headed down stairs.

Before I left I asked him to tell his mom bye for me and he smiled and assured me he would.

At least Emmett was able to make me laugh some as he went on about how I was going to miss the movie made about us.

_Where he got the idea that we were ever gonna rob a casino in Vegas is beyond me. _

When I got home, Rose was sitting on the couch painting her toenails some bright pink color. I tried to sneak past her but I should have known better.

"Aw, did you and Eddie-pie have a fight?" she teased.

I rolled my eyes. "For the last time Rose, I'm not gay. Neither is Edward."

"Right and Em and I are _still_ virgins." She smirked up at me.

"Rose, even if, and that is a very big fucking _if_; Edward and I were gay, you are still in fact _not _a virgin." I spat as I turned to head to my room. I could hear her laugh and yell out 'touché' as I slammed my door closed.

I flopped into my bed face first and screamed. It was bad enough that I was hurting Alice, but fuck did she really have to choose Felix? Last I heard, Alec and Demitri wanted to date her too.

I'm not going to lie, I was jealous of the prick. He gets to be with her and not worry about fucking up any of his friendships. Unlike him, if _I_ were to hurt Alice in any way; I would not only lose her, but Edward, Emmett and Rose too.

Honestly if it was just me and her, I'd be happy. Happy to just run away and be with her, love her the way she wants me to, love her the way she deserves. But I couldn't even promise that I could do that.

So much had changed since October it was almost frightening. I went from seeing Alice as a friend, the little sister of Edward, who was way too beautiful for her own good; to the Alice that I had a crush on and was on my way to falling in love with her.

That is never a good thing. I've only loved my mom and dad, and; let's face it, I couldn't even protect them. So how would I be able to protect Alice from what ever is trying to harm her?

**~*~*~January 26****th**** 2002~*~*~**

Alice and Felix have been seeing each other for five days, two hours and twelve minutes. Not like I was counting or anything.

_Right and Edwin Herbert Land didn't invent polarized filters for the camera_, I spat at myself in my head.

I thought giving her the space she wanted was enough that maybe she would decide to talk to me. But as it stood, now she didn't even look at me half the time.

I remember standing on the other side of the hall as I watched her at her locker last Friday. Normally I leave paper cranes and that's it, but that day I left nine Hershey's Kisses and a note telling her that I loved her too. I waited with baited breath as she opened the locker. I saw the small smile on her face but then _he_ came over, kissing her and taking her attention way from the hidden meaning of the lockers contents.

I watched as she explained something to him, and felt oddly smug when the look of annoyance flashed over her face before he laughed and proceeded to eat her candy.

I wondered if she realized that the nine kisses were for the nine years she'd been in my life.

I thought for sure that the note would make her come up to me. At the very least tell me to go fuck off because I had my chance and blew it, but she never did.

And like I said they've been together for five days, two hours and twenty five minutes.

I could hear her laugh as I stared down at the light table in our photography class. It was the only class that I had with her. I looked up to see Felix smirk at me before he started to kiss her, and that kiss was enough that even Rose and Emmett would find it disgusting. I clenched my fists on the table as I watched his hands grab her ass as she pushed him away.

She started walking to our table, wearing the white jeans I bought her for Christmas; making me wish I bought her the _Linkin_ _Park_ shirt instead. She gave me a nod before sitting down at the farthest end of the table.

When the bell rang for the end of class, I used the opportunity to give her the photo album I had put together for her. It took me a while to complete, but I wasn't sleeping anyway so I might as well do something productive.

She bent over to put her book in her bag, so I slid the booklet in front of her. I looked over at her briefly and had to fight to keep the smile from creeping across my face as the remnants of our night together still lingered on her neck. I licked my lip then bit it before rising to my feet, I would normally wait and see her reaction, but after her not saying anything for the last week and the overwhelming need to make the mark on her neck more pronounced, I decided it was best to leave.

I looked back behind me to see her staring at the book. I couldn't read her face and I think that was the most agonizing part.

_Five days, three hours and five minutes... _

**~*~*~January 28th, 2002~*~*~**

He'd gone too far this time. It was one thing to brag about your girl in the locker room, but to do it in front of her older bother and his two best friends, that was just suicide. He didn't think Edward would do anything about it. Figured Alice would have Edward wrapped around her finger.

She does, I won't deny that. When it came to us, she could commit murder and we'd still do anything to save her ass. But this was different, Edward had to protect his baby sister from Felix.

I remember we were just gonna scare him. Emmett would use his size to intimidate him, Edward would give him a few death glares and spit warnings at him and that was all really.

Neither of us had counted on what he was going to say to me.

I don't remember much, I only remember him pushing past Edward and Emmett to get to me. "What's the matter, Whitlock? You too much of a pussy to get what you want?" he taunted me. "Too bad the tightest one in school is mine now and she's feels _fantastic_."

That's when I swung at him and things went black. When I came to my senses Alice was standing near Rose, a look of terror on her face. Emmett had me pinned to the wall by my throat and his other hand was on Edward's arm. I had almost forgotten that Felix was the person we were supposed to scare.

_What the fuck happened?_ I wondered as my eyes locked onto Alice's.

_I'm sorry Ali..._

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_**End note: Reviews are better than hickies... or really hot sweaty boy fights ;)**_


	10. Chapter 10

******_Disclaimer: All copyrights, trademarked items, or recognizable characters, plots, etc. mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. No copfying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization._**

**_A/N: Robs- OMG YAY! Another Alice chapter... maybe some UST this time? Hehe, Hope you enjoy!_**

**_Special thanks to AmberStar63 for being the awesome beta that she is! We love you hard girl!_**

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**APOV:**

I tossed yet another clear plastic cup into the trash bag I was holding. _Fuck, apparently being Bella's best friend meant I was also her bitch during her wedding. I am so going to pay her back. Bitch is going to be my slave during my wedding,_ I thought as I dumped a few more glasses into the black plastic bag.

I looked over and was torn between being thankful that I wasn't doing this on my own and hating the fact that I wasn't. He was still here. His suit jacket and vest was sitting casually across a chair while his tie hung loosely around his neck, his hair was disheveled and fuck, he looked hotter than hell. I shook my head at myself, _fuck Alice, you're engaged, stop looking at your ex like you haven't been laid in five years._

_But I haven't been laid in five years_, I thought miserably.

_That'll change when you and Garrett get married_.

_Wow, I'm certifiable, fucking thoughts are trying to comfort me now._ And it's not like we haven't done anything, it was just the one time we did, he accidentally palmed what used to be the small pudge I had leftover from being pregnant and it made me feel really self conscious, and completely killed the mood.

Since then, Garrett has actively tried to show me how beautiful I was and we've done intimate things together, but never quite went all the way …yet. I sighed heavily and looked back up to see Jasper was closer to me now, his own trash bag in hand as he cleaned things up. He looked like he was concentrating, his lips pursed and his body flexing with each of his careful movements.

I had been intimate with Jasper in ways I knew I would never be with Garrett. Jasper was my first love, my first… well, my first everything, so of course I did _those_ kinds of things with him. In truth he probably knows my body better than I do, even now.

I chuckled out-loud as I thought about him doing things under the guise of scientific research. Only then did Jasper look over at me, puzzled and definitely curious. I smiled at him, but continued to clean, dancing a little to the music and kicking my shoes off. _Fuck it; if I have to clean this place up I might as well be comfortable_.

I felt the cool cement under my feet and nearly moaned at the feeling, apparently almost twelve hours in heels was not doing my feet any justice. I pulled the pins out of my hair and stashed them in my purse, finger combing my hair before I began cleaning again, my body swaying to the beat to make time pass quicker.

I bent down and started to pick up stray pieces of trash around the tables, but abruptly stood and turned when I heard a rather husky groan from behind me. I raised an eyebrow as I looked at Jasper's face; he looked as if he was battling something inside of him. "Um… sorry." I said quickly.

"It's okay... I'm sorry," he told me quietly.

I nodded, might as well be cordial right? _God, this is harder than I ever imagined_, "How's your girlfriend?"

He gave me a rather tight lipped smile. "Pissed at me but," He shook his head. "You did a really good job with putting all this together for Bells and Ed. You sure you're not a party planner in your spare time?" he teased; I felt the color rise to my cheek again. _Definitely not a party planner_.

"It was nothing... this was actually the wedding I had planned for…" _Us_. I stopped myself for a second when I realized that, I couldn't believe I actually almost admitted it to him, "Never mind."

I think he knew anyway because he gave me a rather sad looking smile. "Yeah…"

_Time to change the subject,_ "So why is your girlfriend pissed at you?"

"There's a long list... you sure you got the time?" He smirked at me.

"I always have time for you N.B.," I admitted, he was after all still my first love and childhood best friend.

"Thanks Ali Cat," he said rather shyly.

"I've known you practically my whole life; I can't let a few years stop me from being your friend."

He nodded his head crisply, "I see your point."

"I mean, if you still want to be friends that is." I added.

"Of course I do."

I smiled at him, "Okay then."

He smiled back, "I guess the next question is, how do we do that?"

I laughed a little, "Yeah. I mean, you're planning on leaving and from what I hear from Rosie, trail- I mean your girlfriend really doesn't like me." He shrugged in response as he bit back a laugh.

"Well Charlie was saying he wanted to talk to me before I left... And even still, my family is here so it's not like I'm gonna stay away again."

_So I was the reason he stayed away all these years_. I tried my hardest not to cry, "I'm sorry you had to stay away," My voice broke, giving me away.

"That had nothing to do with you, Alice," he shook his head. "That's all on me, okay?"

I cupped my elbow and rubbed, "Yeah." _You know how someone says 'it's not you, it's me' and it's utter bullshit? Yeah_. I chewed my lip as I thought of something to say back.

"So... you and Garrett... you two look happy." It seemed like more of a question than a statement.

I smiled at him, "We are... I mean we have our problems," I shrugged, what couple doesn't? "But we are."

He nodded, "Good. If anyone deserves to be happy it's you."

I tilted my head, "How do you figure?"

"What do you mean? You're a great person Ali Cat. You deserve to be happy, to be loved. Hell, you deserve the fairy tale wedding more than Bella does, if you ask me."

_Yeah, whatever Jasper_. I turned away and began cleaning again, "Fairy tales don't exist N.B., happily ever after stops at that point so that you don't find about how the prince actually leaves on his horse and finds a better, prettier princess... ever wonder how come the prince always has the same name in the stories? It's because it's the same damn prince. Fucking bastard."

"Not true. I seem to remember you bitching me out because I called Prince Eric from _The Little Mermaid _the stereotypical Disney Prince. Besides, what the hell makes you think she's prettier than yo-, than the Princess? He may have not ridden off to find something better; he could have been doing it to protect his loved ones," he argued.

"The prince is perfect, and has nothing to protect anyone from. He left because he gets scared, and he wants something new. And if he wasn't, then how come he keeps finding princesses?"

Jasper scoffed, "The prince is far from perfect Alice. If he was as perfect as his friends and family seemed to have believed, he wouldn't have hurt the one person he cared most about. And why does it have to be princesses he's found? What if they were merely someone to take away the emptiness the prince is feeling?"

I looked at him exasperated, "The prince is an idiot then. I am sure the first princess would take him back."

"Ah see now… there's a flaw in that logic. The princess has moved on to _better_ things."

"If he really loved her as much as he said he did wouldn't he at least try?" I argued.

"Until his dying breath…" he whispered, then turned back to clean some more.

"Then why hasn't he?" I asked, sighing before I did the same.

"Maybe because he doesn't want to hurt her again or see that look of disappointment in her eyes when he fucks up like he's destined to do?"

"We're not talking about fairy tales anymore, are we N.B?" I asked, turning to him.

He laughed ruefully, "I don't think we ever were Ali Cat."

I was suddenly embarrassed for having expressed my rather cynical views on men to him. "Sorry for putting you on the spot."

He shook his head, "No, you deserve to have answers Alice. I understand."

"Do you love your girlfriend N.B?" I asked timidly.

"No, definitely not," he answered. I was almost relieved that it wasn't just me he couldn't love.

"But... from what Rosie says, she treats you like crap. Why do you let her treat you like that?" I wondered aloud.

He shrugged, "Because I deserve it maybe. But in all fairness, I'm not very nice to her either."

That didn't sound like the nerdy boy I knew, "How are you not very nice to her?"

He shook his head, "I'm just not good at the relationship stuff."

"Yes you are," I assured him, smiling. He returned the smile.

"I bet you know her birthday, what her favorite color is and what her favorite flower is." I gave him a wry smile. "It's just who you are."

He shook his head disagreeing with me. "I only knew that stuff 'cause I was, what did Rose and Em call me? Oh yeah, 'Stalker boy' when it came to you." He made quotation marks with his fingers.

I scoffed, shaking my head. "That's funny. I never listened to them, they were crazy." I chuckled.

He snorted, "They still are."

"What did they do this time?"

"Just the things they brought up at dinner the other night," he shook his head while laughing.

"What did they bring up?" I pressed.

"The trampoline…"

I shook my head in disbelief, "You were all out of your mind."

"Hence the reason I didn't touch drugs again," he smirked at me. I was going to argue with him, because Viagra is a drug and he took that at one of the themed parties we attended, but decided not to.

"Did you really just do that to get me to talk to you?" I asked.

He nodded vigorously, "Yeah, and it worked, even if you did yell at me for it," He gave me a little smile. "I still say it was worth it."

I shook my head. "No, it wasn't." _Twenty four stitches and hand cast is never worth it._

He leaned against a table near me and crossed him arms. "Ah, but you see, it was. The goal was to get you to talk to me, as was the goal with the other times you found me in your room. Even though you hissed at me, called me an idiot and were far more pissed at me then before. I got you to not only talk to me, but touch me." He smirked as if he had just won some sort of dispute with me. "So worth it, to a seventeen year old boy," he explained.

I sighed a little, cleaning up once again and glancing at him over my shoulder. "Oh yeah, I forgot you had a thing for my body." He mumbled something just as a familiar beat of a song came on, the treble and electronic beat making my body move of its own accord. "N.B., you wanna dance with me?" I asked, looking at him.

He smiled at me, "You know I'm a horrible dancer, you sure you want to risk it?" he raised an eyebrow at me.

"Or… I could just dance around you." I offered, smirking at him as I moved closer, swaying my hips to the beat.

He laughed, "Hey I did a good job of not steppin' on your toe earlier didn't I?"

"Yeah. You did."

"Come on," he held out his hand, "let's dance." I took his hand and took my position, my hand on his shoulder and his hand on my waist, I was really nervous.

"Just two friends dancing right?" he assured.

I took a deep, steadying breath in. "Yeah."

"Since when are you nervous to dance?" he teased as he sashayed around.

I shrugged, "It's just you Jasper, I'm always nervous around you." I gave a rather pathetic laugh.

"Well relax. You don't have to impress me, you know?"

"I know. It's just… I don't think most friends have the history we do."

"Probably not. But since when are you gonna let that stop you?" he goaded. I simply shook my head and turned around in his arms, wrapping my arms up around his neck, staring out at the river and letting the music guide my hips as they wiggled to the pulse. Almost as if he was shy, he wrapped his arms around me and moved with me, alerting me to the protrusion of his pants.

"Gee Jasper…" I smirked as I looked up at him, "I see you still have a hard time keeping junior in check."

"He knows what he likes," he growled in a low voice.

"Does he now?" I asked in a teasing tone.

"Yes ma'am," his voice sounded terribly strained.

"You want in my very expensive panties Jasper?" I purred.

"That's a loaded question Alice."

"How so?" I asked, still swirling my hips.

"Because the honest answer will make me seem like a two timing ass, while the appropriate answer would be a very, very big lie."

_He wants me. He still fucking wants me, incredible_. I laced my fingers in his hair and yanked him down so I could whisper in his ear, "You want to bend me over and handcuff me then fuck me like you used to, Jasper?"

He groaned audibly and pulled me closer to him, lightly grinding his erection into my ass. "That's just one of the many things I want to do Alice," he whispered huskily.

"Tell me what you want to do to me…" I purred.

He panted heavily in my ear for a moment before he responded, "I want to kiss every inch of your skin... Taste you, make love to you and then fuck you senseless." He growled the last part.

I nibbled his ear, making him moan and pull me even closer. "That sounds so good," I purred. "Too bad we're both in relationships, huh?" I said as I pushed away from him.

He gaped for a moment as my words sank in before righting himself, "Right."

I turned around and busied myself with cleaning again, trying to drive out the thoughts of Jasper bending me over one of the reception tables and fucking the hell out of me. "If it makes you feel better I wish you could."

"Maybe this gets easier over time?" he offered after a few minutes.

"I hope so," I responded, smiling.

"Me too."

I couldn't help myself, I had to ask. "Did your girlfriend really…" _Uh fuck, maybe I can't ask this_. I felt the heat rise to my face, shit I was blushing again. "Never mind."

"Did she really what?" he asked back in a rather demanding voice.

"Um... does she really try to be like me?" I whispered.

He laughed heartily. "Yeah... She got her hair cut and colored like you used to have it and everything."

Whoa, creepiness. "Um… should I be expecting her to come kill me sometime soon?"

"No Alice…" He sounded frustrated. "That was her sick and twisted idea, hoping that I might fall in love with her or something." He explained.

I scoffed at that, "Yeah, seriously twisted, because she really doesn't want to be me."

"She could never be you Alice…" his voice was gentle, almost loving.

"No, I mean, I don't even want to be me half the time." I could hear my voice begin to rise.

"What? Why? From what I heard despite the shit I put you through, you still managed to graduate early from UCLA Magna Cum Laude, and you're the highest in demand in your field... or is that just Edward playing proud big brother and lying to me the last five years?"

I turned to look at him. "No that is all true, I just... went through a lot while you were gone Jasper," he turned away from me and began cleaning again. I rolled my eyes, _of course he doesn't want to hear it._ Then turned and began cleaning again. More dirty paper plates, used napkins and spent plastic cups.

"I'm sorry I put you through hell... had I know that would be the outcome of everything…" he said after a few minutes.

"What would you have done Jasper?"

"Gone about things differently." I rolled my eyes and sighed. Yeah, I am sure he would have. "What Alice?" he asked, haughtily.

"Like that would've helped Jasper." I could hear the venom in my voice.

"Well it depends on what you mean Alice."

I could feel the tears start to well. I was angry and becoming furious that I was crying because I was angry. "I didn't want to trap you Jasper; I knew exactly what you would do, but I wanted you to want me, I wanted you to want to come back. I didn't want you to come back out of guilt or because it was something you felt like you owed me."

"See that's what I mean Alice! I wouldn't have left period. I left 'cause I was scared out my mind that I was going to hurt you. Make things harder for you. But look at that, I made things worse by leaving. I wanted you. I always wanted you!" He yelled. I didn't want to respond, everything in me told me to hit him, oh dear lord did I want to hit him, but I wouldn't let him do that to me. He would not drop me to that level he would not… _why the fuck am I cleaning? I did everything for this wedding. He can fucking clean it._

"You know what? Ugh!" I screamed as I stormed away, slamming the door of the church as I went through the building.

I don't know why I am so upset, I should have expected it. The thing about us, and I'll never understand why, but we fight as much as we used to fuck. Hell, we even fought while we fucked.

***~*~*~*February 14****th**** 2005*~*~*~***

_Oh God, I love kissing Jasper. _

I tried as hard as I could to push to the back of my mind the fact that he was recording an intimate act between us.

_Come on Alice, this is fun, everyone has a sex tape, and you wanted a permanent reminder of how you looked when your boobs still defied gravity, remember? _

I felt his hips jerk against mine a little harder as a grunt escaped his lips and was captured by my mouth. My eyes rolled with pleasure as he began moving at a different angle and I broke our kiss to moan out a quiet, "Oh fuck yeah, that feels good."

He moved us so that my ass was on the bottom of the bed and he was standing on the floor, holding one of my hips with one hand as he continued gentle thrusts into me while filming us. "Gah, Ali cat, you feel so good," he groaned, he sped up his thrusts, the camera aimed down at where we were connected.

I watched as he let go of my hip and opened up the little screen to watch himself fuck me. "You're so beautiful A.C."

_I hate it when he compliments my genitalia_; I rolled my eyes, "I'm glad my pussy is so pretty in your opinion."

"I wasn't talking about your pussy just then Alice," He raised his head to look at my eyes, his freshly washed hair falling in his face a little.

"Well that's all you were looking at," I argued as he continued thrusting and he rolled his eyes at me. "Why are you rolling your eyes Jasper?"

"Can't you just enjoy this?" he snapped, moving his hands and the camera so that he could raise my hips and push hard into me.

I moaned in spite of myself, _that shit felt good_. "I am enjoying this; I wish you liked me for more than just a nice place to stick it in." I snapped back when I regained my thoughts, he stopped moving and gaped at me. _Fuck, okay that was a little harsh_. "Maybe we should stop."

That seemed to bring him out of his thoughts. "You're more than that to me Ali Cat." He leaned back down and kissed me passionately, his tongue stroking mine and his lips hard and determined, making me forget about anything I was mad about, I pushed my hips against him and he pulled away, pulling out of me and leaving me naked and wanting on the bed. "I love you."

"I love you too…" I tilted my head at his rather glum expression as he looked down and messed with the camera a little. _Damn it, I am such a bitch_. I rolled over onto my stomach; I knew nerdy boy liked it this way and shook my ass at him, "Come on nerdy boy." I purred.

"That's my girl," he said, his voice thick with lust as he smacked my right cheek softly. I bit my lip and moaned as he continued to playfully spank me while reentering me.

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K: Ha, look at that you thought there wasn't going to be an Author's note! HAHAHA. No seriously though, mine's at the end cause I got some serious business to talk to y'all about. *puts on serious face* It's that time again. The wonderful ladies behind **The Fandom Gives Back Auction is holding the Eclipse edition June 26th 11:59 PM EST to July 2nd 11:59PM EST**. Why should you care, you ask? Elementary our dears readers. The FGB Auctions allows the fandom to bond together for a good cause (and no not the cause of getting into Robert/Peter/Kellan/Jackson's Pants... pervs :P). **We raise money For Alex's Lemonade Stand** (Google it if you don't know!). What does this have to do with Alsper? Good question! See Robs *points to Robs* and I are in it this time. Yep. _We're in **Two** of the auctions. So this is your chance to either get a Jasper/Alice missing moments/AU one-shot from either OMS, TR, or DaS or/and a whole new one-shot featuring **your **plot and Cannon Pairing of **your** choice_. Want more deets? Go to http:/ /alsper(dot)blogspot(dot)com to learn more information about our auctions!

Phew okay... long A/N from me. But I had to get that out since um... it's this weekend... Also enjoy your _Eclipse_ viewings. And please, no spoilers (I won't be able to see it until it comes on DVD *pouts*)


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: All copyrights, trademarked items, or recognizable characters, plots, etc. mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization.**

**K- oh hai. How you doin'? Me I'm good. Got ya another Nerdy Boy update… These two are gonna be on the Alsper blog soon for a round of the hot seat should be interesting. So think about some questions you want to ask NB and/or AC and leave them in yer review ;)**

**Robs- Yay! Another Jasper chapter! Ain't y'all excited? See what the heck he thought of Alice's little tease ;) Thanks as always to our usual suspects and the peeps who came out of lurkdom to review! We love it!**

**As always, a big thank you and naked pictures of men for our Beta Ms. AmberStar63.**

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**JPOV**

So the last meeting with Alice wasn't what I hoped for. Honestly, I expected her to be angry with me. I just didn't expect for her to go storming out like she did.

"Jasper! Are you listening me?"

I rolled my eyes as I parked Emmett's jeep in front of the small station for the Forks Police department. "Yeah, Kel, I heard you. Fuck I think the whole town heard you."

"Well, if you would stop ignoring me and I wouldn't have to yell."

"What do you want Kelly Anne?"

"I want my boyfriend to stop chasing his ex's tail and come home," she said in a voice that I'm pretty sure she wanted to sound cute, but if anything it was more like nails on a chalk board.

"I'm not chasing anything," I sighed exasperated. _It's not like Alice would give me a chance anyhow_. "I told you before the wedding, I'll be home in a week. I haven't seen my friends and family-"

"Yeah, yeah. Bullshit Jasper, you saw your sister here remember? You're just using this as an excuse to see _her_ again and I know it."

"Damn it Kelly, I don't want to fight right now. I have to go meet with Chief Swan now. You think you can stop being a bitch long enough to say goodbye or do I need to hang up on you?"

"Mmm... Jasper, you know how hot I think you are when you're angry..." She purred and I resisted the urge to gag.

"Bye Kel."

"Love you _Nerdy B-_." I snapped the phone shut to end the call before tossing it to the floor board of the car. I fucking hated that she called me by that name.

~oOo~

Even though I had seen Charlie less than twenty four hours before, I still felt nervous about seeing him. He said he wanted to meet with me regarding a professional matter, which doesn't calm my nerves any. Growing up, Charlie and Carlisle were two important father figures for me and both are the reason why I decided to go through the academy.

"Jasper, hey son. Glad you could make it!" Charlie greeted me warmly with a firm handshake.

"Of course, sir." He laughed and pointed to the chair in front of his desk.

"Don't give me that sir crap," he chided. "Just cause my baby girl got married don't mean I'm old."

"Would think of it... sir," I joked.

He smiled at me as he sat down, pushing a file over at me. "Let's talk shop."

~oOo~

"Wait, so dad offered you a spot in the lab?" Bella asked as she chopped vegetables.

"Yup," I offered, popping a piece of cucumber in my mouth.

"In Seattle though? For how long? Where are you going to stay? Have you told..."

"Whoa, love, calm down. Let Jasper answer your first question before asking him more." Edward inturrupted as he hung his coat up in the mud room. "Hey Jazz."

"Hey," I greeted back with a slight laugh. "Sorry about the honeymoon by the way." Edward just shook his head at me before giving Bella a kiss. I looked down at the marble tile. Ed and Bells were never as open about their relationship as Rose and Em are, but they still had their moments that made me feel like I was intruding.

"Alright Jasper, answer my questions." Bella said shooing Edward away.

"Well, he needs help with forensics... I'm just here until my part is done. Based on what I saw, I'd say three weeks tops."

"You staying with the Hale's?" Edward asked as he handed me a beer from the fridge.

"That or with Rosie and Em." I shrugged.

Bella shook her head. "That's stupid Jazz. The Hale's are in Forks. That's like an eight hour commute back and forth."

"I have my bike," I winked at her. "That can cut three maybe four hours off." I knew she hated when we joked about going above the speed limit.

"No. Bike or no bike, that commute is ridiculous."

"She's got a point Jazz." Ed agreed. "And Emmett wouldn't hesitate to pull your ass over."

I shook my head and laughed. "What do ya'll suggest? It's too expensive to get a hotel that whole time. And I need somewhere that I can work at night..."

I watched as Edward and Bella seemed to have some silent conversation before she set the knife down and went to her purse. "Alright, so you need a place to stay, that's quiet and you can use to work from home with for at least a month, yes?" She asked.

"Uh... yeah?" I looked over at Edward who seemed to be thinking something over.

She turned and held a set of keys in front of her. "My lease is up at the end of the month. But it's yours for the time being. I'm still in the process of moving out, but I'll use Ed's key." She put the keys in my pocket before patting my face. "Who knows, maybe this will give you incentive to stay."

"Isabella..." Edward said in a warning tone.

"Oh don't give me that shit Edward. You want him to stay too."

"I do but I'm not going to throw it in his face, Love," Edward smirked at her before taking a long pull off his beer.

"You do realize the _he_ you speak of is right here?" I clarified, making them laugh.

"Welcome home Jazz," Edward said with a smirk as he raised his bottle.

***~*~*~*March 4th, 2004*~*~*~***

"Welcome to our home away from home Ali Cat," I said softly as I carried our bags into the room behind her.

"This place is amazing!" She spun around to look at me, her face glowing with happiness.

I smiled at her as I set the bag down. "So you like it?" I had saved up from the jobs I did over the summer just to get a nice room of our anniversary. The guys didn't understand why I wanted to celebrate the anniversary of Ali Cat and I being best friends, but I knew she would understand.

"Oh my gosh, it's fantastic!" she spun around, taking it all in again before going to the wall of windows with a view of the Pacific Ocean. "It's so beautiful N.B."

I walked up behind her and wrapped my arms around her. "I'm glad you like it Ali Cat," I said softly before kissing her temple. "I wanted to do something nice for us."

She leaned into me, "Why today?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, it's March... we first had sex in November..." she shrugged a little.

I chuckled softly. "True, but we've been friends longer than that."

She turned to face me, "we met in the summer."

"Well... unofficially you became my best friend in March..." _Emmett was right, I sound like a girl._

"Oh... the time you uh... well the first time you held me while we slept?" she gave me a small smile.

I nodded. "Yeah..."

"I guess that is something to celebrate huh?" she winked at me.

I laughed and nodded. "Yes. Plus it gives me a reason to have you all to myself without any interruptions," I waggled my eyebrows at her.

She laughed, "Oh you mean you don't like Emmett barging in like he owns the place?"

"Exactly." I swear one of these days we're gonna get caught.

"We almost got caugh last weekend..." she smiled wickedly.

"Yes, but luckily we didn't. Your brother would have killed me."

"I'll protect you," she reached up and kissed me gently. I cupped the back of her neck as I deepened the kiss, allowing for us to get lost in the moment as our tongues danced together.

I pulled away slightly to see her smile a little before biting her bottom lip. "Isn't it my job to protect you?" I asked.

"You do anyway," she smiled and leaned in to kiss me again.

**~oOo~**

Yeah, protecting her. At least that's what I thought I would be doing all those years ago when I left. I should have known better. I think the truth is I got scared.

Why else would I throw everything away like I did? Because I'm a fucking moron, that's why.

"It's just two weeks tops Whitlock. You can do this," I said to myself as I carried in the last of my things to Bella's old apartment. I was grateful Bella was letting me stay here for the time being. I honestly don't think I could have stayed sane at Greg and Brianna's place, and as much as I love my sister, I know we would have ended up in fist fight before too long.

I'm not sure why I jumped at the opportunity to stay like I did when Charlie offered it to me. Sure the new Mr. and Mrs. Edward Cullen were happy I was staying here. Hell, I knew Em and Rose were too, but none of that matter to me. The only person's opinion that I cared about probably could care less.

What else should I expect? I left her at prom after promising to always be there. I barely even contacted her in the past five years. She moved on, just like I wanted her to.

I shook my head, trying to get her off my mind. _I need a drink._

I looked around the kitchen for something, anything really that might dull the pain a bit and lucked out. Bella had an unopened bottle of Southern Comfort stashed in the back of the fridge. The only time she would drink soda was if it was spiked with this shit when we were younger. _Some things never change_, I thought as I noticed the Dr. Pepper next to it.

I carried the bottle to the living room where my laptop bag and a box sat. I stared at the box as if it had all the answers to my problems before sitting down and picking it up.

It was just an old shoe box that Alice had decorated with various picture from magazines she liked or thought reminded her of us. "It's our box" she had said when she showed it to me.

And that's just what this box was, ours. Everything in it was related to the relationship we had. Whether it be concert tickets, movie stubs, pictures, hell, even random notes were thrown in here. I brought it back with me, deciding it was hers to keep, if she wanted to destroy the memories in it, then so be it. They were hers to decide what to do with.

I thumbed through the contents in the box, stopping to look at the various pictures, before I came across a dvd. I felt my eyebrow quirk up at it, since it had Alice's neat penmanship on it. _He lied_, was printed across the front with a smiley face.

I turned my computer on and placed the dvd in the drive, waiting as it loaded up.

There laid Alice, her black hair fanned across my pillow as she stuck her tongue out at the camera. I could hear myself laughing.

"Seriously N.B., turn it off." Ali laughed trying to cover her face with her hands.

"Come on babe, just a kiss on camera… please," I whined. She brought her hands down and rolled her eyes. I could see the smile she was fighting to hide.

"Why did you even buy that? I thought you wanted to get a new camera?"

"I did get a new camera. This is better cause I can film our little trips." She rolled her eyes again in response and licked her lips.

"I don't know…" she started.

"Just one kiss Ali Cat, and I promise… I'll turn it off."

"Fine," she conceded.

The camera moved a bit before her profile came into view. "N.B.… it's still on."

"No it's not."

"Yeah, it is." She looked into the lens. "The red light is on."

"No, it's just the stand-by," I said as my head came into view.

I remembered what I was doing as I watched us on the screen, the memory of how her soft skin felt against my lips, and the way she tasted when I ran my tongue over her skin. I could tell by the way she sucked in her bottom lip that I had just bitten her ear. I could hear her moan softly, her head moving to give me better access to her neck.

"N.B.," she whined, her eyes locked onto the camera lens.

My head moved back up, mere inches from hers. I looked at the lens for a moment and smiled before kissing the corner of her mouth, making her look up at me. "Just relax Ali Cat," I told her softly. "If it _is_ recording I promise I'll erase it."

She glanced at the camera again. Now after all these years I could still see the fear and excitement in her green eyes. She turned back to look at me. "No one sees this." She warned.

I held three fingers my left hand up. "Scouts honor."

I pushed fast forward on the computer as I took a long pull from the whiskey. I fucked up royally. We went from the happiness on this damned disk to her wanting to castrate me on sight.

_I deserve it though._

She was looking at the camera again, smiling as she bit her lip. I pushed play and the room was filled with the sound of her soft moans. I watched, entranced with her face. Periodically her eyes would flutter shut as she told me that she liked what I was doing. Just watching this video, listening to her sounds and seeing the way I used to make her happy, both turned me on and made it painful to watch.

"Oh God... Jazz!" she cried out in the video. I quickly shut it off as I took another pull from the whiskey. I knew what happens next, but didn't have the strength to watch it.

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**End note: Seriously, the present time Jasper and Alice have to have sex some time right? Reviews inspire them to ;)**


	12. Chapter 12

_**Disclaimer: Don't own. But we own the plot. Kthanx.**_

_**K: So a big thank you to everyone that donated what they could to The Fandom Gives Back auction! Robs and I made **__**$57.00 which aint bad for our first time :) So congrats to the four winners that will be getting goodies!**_

_**Robs- well... well... well... Ali Cat is back yet again to tell us her thoughts... I wonder if she's ever gonna talk to N.B. about Ryan... hmmm we shall see...**_

_**Special thanks to Amber who is driving around atm like a crazy woman :P Love yah girlie!

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**_

**APOV:**

I couldn't get him and his damn piercing grey eyes out of my head. It was like he was haunting me, only I knew it was self possessed.

I am still in love with Jasper Whitlock._ I so do not need this._ I still am in love with Garrett._ I am engaged to him for God's sake._ I promised,_ well not officially,_ but nonetheless I told him I loved him, only him, and that I would marry him.

That was before Jasper held me in his arms as we danced, before the dirty talk and the fight we had. I heard my phone ring and let the voicemail get it; _maybe Mr. Volturi would let me have a few personal days to figure things out._ I leaned my head onto my folded hands and let a single tear escape.

_I am so fucked._

I heard a tap at my door and without raising my head I told whoever it was to come in.

"Alice, is everything okay?" My head snapped up at the voice.

"I'm sorry Mr. Volturi! I just have a bad headache." I lied smoothly.

"Alice, I've told you before, please call me Aro and if you have a headache why don't you call it a day, we're not really too busy today and I need you in top form for the meeting on Friday." He told me, giving me a fatherly like smile. I nodded a little in response and packed my bag, ready to go home.

~*oOo*~

I don't really know how I ended up here, but I sat in front of the Seattle police station, making sure my hair was perfect, my makeup wasn't smudged, and that my teeth didn't have anything in them. I had to know why he left, why he no longer wanted me when it was very apparent on that dance floor that his body still craved me as much as mine did him.

After opening the door of my Porsche and fixing the ribbon on my shoes where they wound up my legs, I marched into the station like a lady on a mission. I was greeted by a burly man at the front desk.

"Can I help you?" he asked in a charmingly deep voice, perfectly suited to his body stature. I gave him a flirty smile, he smiled a little back.

"I need to speak to Jasper Whitlock, fairly sure he'll be in the lab?" I said as a question, hoping he would know who I was talking about and that I was flirty enough to have him do what I wanted.

He nodded a little sadly. "Yes, hold on ma'am I'll call him up. Can I have your name Miss?"

I nodded and gave him another flirty smile, "Alice Cullen."

After a few minutes on the phone the man looked back at me, "He'll be right up."

"Thank you ever so much." I batted my eyes a little, making him blush. _Score one for Alice._ He pointed to a row of uncomfortable looking plastic chairs, I gave him a little wink before I perched myself on one and crossed my legs, letting my skirt push up a little on my thigh.

I knew nerdy boy liked that shit. Why I was still doing it was beyond me.

As always, I felt him before I actually saw him, it was as if something about him was directly tied to my body's natural reactions. I closed my eyes momentarily, cursing the fact that his mere presence made me wet as I shifted in my seat a little. When I opened my eyes I saw him, hair a mess, like he'd been tugging at it, dark rimmed glasses on his face, dark jeans, a button up and Converse sneakers. _Well, at least some things never change_. I smirked a little at him as he walked over to me, his grey eyes locked onto mine.

He shoved his hands in his pockets when he reached me, "Hey Ali Cat…" He gave me a rather tight smile, he wasn't all that happy to see me. _Good._ "What can I do for you?"

I stood up, even in the four inch heels I only came up to his shoulder. I tried to make myself as tall as possible. I licked my lips to moisten them a little. "I need to talk to you."

He nodded his understanding, "Okay, uh… give me a minute?"

With a nod of my head I said, "Sure."

I watched him turn and jog over to a desk in the back, talking to an older officer before he ran back, I couldn't help but notice how his shirt moved exposing little bits of skin here and there. Fuck I need to get laid and stop thinking about him. "Sorry, have to tell them when I leave... Uh do you want some coffee or something?" he asked me, not even a little breathless from his run.

I shook my head, "No... just somewhere private."

"Uh okay..." He sounded a bit nervous as he nodded. "Well, I'm staying at Bella's old place if you want to follow?"

I gave him what I hoped was a winning smile. "That sounds great." After all, Bella's old apartment was very private.

"Okay," he affirmed, holding the door open for me.

I waved and gave another quick wink to the officer behind the desk before turning to walk out the door. "Thank you." I said quietly, as I passed by Jasper walking out the door.

"No problem." I heard him behind me; I smirked and swayed my hips a little as I walked to my car, hoping he was paying attention to what he missed out on. I turned to see him straddle his old bike and put the helmet on. _Fuck me, that still turns me on._

_Stop it Alice!_ I chided myself resting my forehead on the steering wheel so I could regain my composure before I drove to the familiar apartment.

The sound of the bike's engine broke me out of my reverie, _damn thing was loud_, and I put the key in the ignition and turned, listening to the purr of the engine as I reversed and followed Jasper about five minutes down the street to the Avalon Belltown Apartments and turned into the parking lot.

I followed him up the stairs and watched as he opened Bella's old apartment door. I wonder if he plans to keep it, I thought as I walked in. _Stupid Alice, he's leaving, he has a girlfriend, stop entertaining the thought, besides you are with Garrett, remember? _I sighed, _I so didn't deserve him._

Jasper led the way into the main living area of the apartment; it used to be fully decorated, much like my own apartment, except in blues and purples. Now everything was taken down and there were a few boxes with Bella's handwriting left in the dining room near the table, and sitting on the coffee table in front of Bella's sofa was the box of keepsakes Jasper and I collected together. I swallowed hard when I saw it. He still had it; he didn't toss it or burn it. He kept it. I could feel the tears form at the corner of my eyes. Then I saw sitting next to it a half-full bottle of Sothern Comfort. _Well then..._

I raised an eyebrow slightly at Jasper as I sat in the blue gingham armchair, crossing my legs and giving him a little show of my thighs. He obviously noticed. I watched his tongue dart out to lick his bottom lip as he eyed my legs appreciatively and sat on the sofa. I cleared my throat and gave him a satisfied smirk as he blushed a little.

He rubbed his hand along the back of his neck for a moment before leaning his forearms on his thighs and looking at me, "So to what do I owe the unexpected surprise?"

I could no longer remember the well rehearsed words I had planned to say, I chewed my lip for a moment trying to figure out what it was. I started and stopped a few times realizing that no matter what I said the words were gonna come out wrong. "I can't stop thinking about you." I finally told him.

He looked down at his clasped hands, "I'm... sorry?"

I swallowed hard, "I just... I mean I thought about you every day while you were gone, but the pain was starting to go away." I looked down at my legs, _even though it was starting to go away, I was never truly happy without him here_. "Okay so this isn't going how I wanted it to." I admitted, sighing.

"Well I'm sorry that my coming back here caused you pain... I'm just finishing this case and I'll be out of your hair." My head snapped up when he said that, noticing the tight smile on his face but he still wasn't looking at me. _It might be so easy for him, but not for me_.

I scoffed at his words, "Yeah okay." I said sarcastically, my tone harsh.

He looked at me then, his expression unreadable, "Excuse me?"

"Don't you get it? You are never out of my head therefore never out of my hair!"

"Obviously I was 'cause you're with that Gary guy or what ever the fuck his name is!" He had no right to be angry about that, and it enraged me even more.

"Well I was done fucking pining over you, wishing you'd come back, hurting every time I sa-heard about you with another girl. You left me Jasper, when I needed you the most you weren't here! I needed someone and Garrett is a good man who loves me and won't hop on a plane one day and run off like a coward!" I spat angrily.

He stood up and faced me, his stormy eyes narrowed and fists clenched, "Well if that's the case, then why are you here with me instead of with him?" I jumped up at that, tilting my head so I could glare at him, wishing I wasn't so short.

"Because I wanna know why? Why N.B.?" My voice broke with the punctuation of my special nickname for him as the tears that had threatened to fall earlier now trickled down my face.

"Because I loved you too much to stay here and hurt you!" His voice sounded exasperated.

"Bullshit! You hurt me anyway!"

"Trust me Alice, I could have done worse." His voice was stern, with a note of finality to it.

I shook my head, "Fine. I give up arguing with you. Obviously trying to find out anything from you is like trying to figure out what a fortune cookie means." He stared at me, eyes narrowed. "I am sorry I came to bother you." I spat, glaring at him through the tears, "I'll leave you be now so you can laugh about me with your stupid precious girlfriend." I hissed before walking around the coffee table and grabbing my purse off the chair. "I was stupid to think you cared."

Before I could walk away, he grabbed my arm and tugged me to face him. "I do care Alice."

"You don't get to touch me like that anymore Jasper!" I yanked my arm out of his grasp. "I don't believe you."

"How the hell am I supposed to prove that to you Alice? Enlighten me because I have no fucking clue what you want me to do here," he growled out irritably.

I shook my head. "I am pretty fucking sure that if you actually cared, you would think of a way." He stared at me again, not saying anything. I actually hoped he would make some grand gesture... something... and I received nothing. I took a deep breath to calm myself. "You can't can you?" I whispered, looking at his hard expression, greeted once again with silence. _I can't do this anymore, I am engaged to Garrett, I am a stupid woman._ I shook my head. "Go bury yourself between your girlfriend's thighs. Tell her I feel sorry for her, you're just using her like you use everyone else."

"You think I used you?" he whispered, irate as he glared at me, "I never used you, Alice. I don't fucking want her. I want you and you're making it very difficult for me right now."

_He didn't even know what he did_; I felt a bit of pity for him and gave him a sad smile. "I _let_ you use me, I hoped..." _That you could find a way to love me._ I thought as a tear rolled down my cheek. "But it never came true, I know you don't want her, but you don't want me either." I was going to continue on my path out the door, but he leapt over the small coffee table and pulled me to him, kissing me desperately, our tongues struggling against one another. I broke our kiss so I could pull away, my core already throbbing and aching to be filled by him, there was no turning back now, I hoped he understood that. "Jasper don't start what you can't finish." I whispered, and he smirked at me.

"And who said I can't."

I gave him an eyebrow, my hands resting on his strong chest. "Your girlfriend Kathy or what ever the fuck her name is."

He locked eyes with me and started to walk me back, I couldn't break his gaze if I tried. "Sorry to disappoint you darlin' but this isn't about her. This is about you and me."

I hit the wall and my hands fell back, clutching for something to hold onto. _You and me_. The words rang over and over in my head. "What about us?" I asked him breathless.

"You seemed to be sadly mistaken thinking that I don't want you. But see here's the thing Alice. You have been on my mind every goddamned second of every goddamned day since you were twelve fucking years old. I wanted you then, and goddamn it I want you now."

_Since I was twelve_, I felt my heart almost stop with his admission, "Well then, I guess you really have something to prove don't you?" I gave him a speculative eyebrow, "Because words are pointless." He growled before his lips collided with mine, kissing me with so much passion my knees almost gave out.

I gave into his kiss, kissing him back with just as much enthusiasm. My hands finding the fabric of his shirt and tugging, hard, I heard the snapping sound and light pings from the buttons scattering and hitting the walls. I felt him grin against my lips,_ fucker_, I pinched his nipple through his undershirt and he hissed, breaking our kiss to look into my eyes.

His hands found their way to my back and pulled apart my dress near the zipper, I heard the sound of the fabric ripping and then felt the cool air of the apartment against my bare skin as my dress fell away. I took a deep breath as his eyes wandered my body; I tensed up as he saw my scarred belly and waited for him to ask about the faded stretch marks.

But he didn't say anything; instead he shrugged the button up off and pulled the undershirt off, revealing to me the beauty of his torso. If I thought he was hot before, he was even more so now. I licked my lips as I stared openly at the well defined muscles on his sides, the developed pecs, the sculpted six pack and the deep V leading to his cock that I could see was straining against his jeans. I ran my hand down his body, leaving gooseflesh in my wake and rubbed against the rather large bulge.

Licking my lips as I looked up at him, I dropped to my knees and he leaned on his hands against the wall. Not breaking eye contact I popped the button and lowered the zipper, slowly, letting my fingers graze his cotton covered member before I pulled the jeans down to his ankles and finally looked at the perfectly held bulge in the boxer briefs my nerdy boy now sported. _Well, that was an interesting change._

I met his hooded eyes once again as I ran my lips along the bulge, sucking roughly through the fabric once I got to the head. "Jesus," I heard him moan out, making me extremely smug.

"Does your girlfriend like these?" I growled at him, he glared at me and growled back as I pulled them down, his swollen cock springing out. I wrapped my hand around as much of it as I could and stroked him gently. He groaned and leaned closer to the wall as I took him into my mouth, sucking and swirling my tongue around the head. I continued my movements, bobbing as his hips bucked forward into my expectant mouth.

"Fuck..." he groaned as I relaxed my throat and pushed myself down till my nose was pressed against his flesh, then came back up slowly, releasing him with a pop and then standing up.

"Can your little girlfriend do that?" I asked him, smug and defiant.

He took my hands in his, our fingers lacing automatically and pulled them together up over my head, pulling me up against the wall. "Depends, does your boyfriend know this?" he asked in a husky voice, rich with his southern accent. With that, wetness flooded my core as he kissed and nipped at my neck just below my ear.

"I don't wanna think about him right now, fuck me N.B." I partially moaned out. I felt him smirk against my skin.

"With pleasure."

Pulling both of my wrists into his right hand, he let his left glide gently down my arm to my breast, squeezing as he continued to kiss and nibble on my neck, traveling down to the swell before pulling the fabric down and taking the hardened nub into his mouth, my back arching as a response to his attention.

"Jasper…" I moaned out, wrapping my legs around his waist and pressing my center against his stomach.

"Are you in need of some special attention Ali Cat?" He drawled as his hand traveled further south to my lace thong before he ran a finger along the edge, driving me absolutely insane.

"Yes." I groaned out, biting my lip in earnest. He gave me a devilish smile as his fingers went even farther south, brushing against my pearl before quickly moving the fabric to the side and thrusting himself into me, my jaw dropping open and a indescribable sound coming out all at once.

He stilled his hips for a moment and smirked at me with half lidded eyes, letting go of my hands to grab the underside of my thigh. My hands weaved themselves into his hair and pulled him to my lips, kissing him hungrily as we thrust together, the feeling of him inside me was remarkable, memory had definitely not served it justice.

He pushed me harder and pressed his knee up against the wall using it as a prop for my thigh so both of his hands could explore my body. His lips moved back down to my bosom as he flicked down the fabric that covered the other breast and bit down on my nipple, hard. I dug my nails into his back and yanked, scratching him rather than screaming out. He cupped my breasts in both his hands and flicked his thumb across the sensitive peaks as he whispered huskily into my cleavage. "God, I've missed you."

I smirked and rolled my hips faster to meet his, desperate to reach the cliff I had only dreamed about for five years. He met my thrusts with as much enthusiasm, almost pulling out all the way before slamming into me hard and making me cry out with pleasure every time. I could feel the ball tightening in my stomach and knew I was close, I think he knew it too because he suddenly moved his hands to my ass and squeezed as he moved us away from the wall and backed up till he hit the couch and landed with a soft thud, still inside of me.

I grabbed the back of the sofa for leverage as he held onto my hips and bucked on him quickly, his hips thrusting up hard as he bit into his lip and locked eyes with me. I pulled my hips all the way up releasing him and slammed myself back down, burying him to the hilt and felt the orgasm wash over me, my head lolling back as I felt him throb and spill inside of me, groaning into my chest.

I recovered for a minute before moving slightly so I could look at him. "Fuck, you'd think I'd fucking learn." Then leaned my head onto the top of the couch.

"Learn what?"

I groaned into the couch, "To use a condom."

"Well unlike last time, we weren't expecting that…" he mused, his fingertips brushing lightly against my sides and making me turn my head so I could look into those penetrating grey eyes.

"Last time was," _extremely romantic_. I smiled a little as I remembered. He seemed to agree because he smiled and nodded. I wondered when he was going to ask about the stretch marks, I could still see them and they were very obvious. "I know you're dying to know so just ask."

"You're referring to Ryan right? Because I already know…" I gaped and he covered my mouth with his hand. "And before you threaten harm to anyone. Emmett filled me in, but only after Garrett so rudely clued me in." He removed his hand to let me speak.

"Garrett told you? What did he say?"

Jasper shook his head. "Just something really uncalled for and Edward made Emmett remove me from the party for a minute."

"Oh." I chewed my lip, I wonder what Rhett would've said to make NB mad like that. "Yeah, um… you're a Daddy... only not really."

"Yeah."

_Well, time to get cleaned up_, I moved off of him. "I'll be right back," I went to the bathroom to clean myself off, ashamed of myself for what had just happened. Jasper, while my childhood best friend, was not my fiancé, he was not the man in love with me, and not someone I could count on to stick around. I shook my head as I looked around for something to wear since he so carelessly ripped my six hundred dollar, Yves Saint Laurent dress, something I was trying not to be pissed about, and found an undershirt of his. _Fuck it_. I smelled it to make sure it wasn't too dirty before pulling it over my head and walking back out to the living room, seeing that he was finally pulling his pants up and he laughed when he took in my look. _Yes, I was styling his undershirt with fuck hot heels… all I need is a belt and I would be fashionable._

"I can give you a clean one you know," he chuckled.

"Well, it was on the floor and you ripped my dress." I said, crossing my arms. "I figured since I have to go home I might as well not steal something that you need for work."

"Ah, so you're a fuck and run kind of girl now, huh?" He nodded his head a little at me as my eyebrows jumped to my hairline.

"Yeah well... I figured it's how you like them best right?"

He rolled his eyes at me as he buttoned his khakis. "Actually I was thinking you'd like to work on that whole friendship thing we talked about earlier." He lips turned up in such a cruel manner I hardly recognized my Nerdy Boy. "Unless Garrett has such a tight leash on you that you can't have male friends."

"Friends don't fuck against walls, N.B." I snapped, shaking my head, "And I ain't the one that has a significant other with issues." _As it stands, I think I'll need to get a restraining order against the crazy bitch after what just happened._

"I suppose the only thing to do now is replace that dress, right?"

I rolled my eyes and put a hand up in front of me. "Whatever N.B., you're still an ass who just uses people for sex. Forget about the dress."

"No Ali Cat, I'm not. I want to actually try to get my best fucking friend back."

"Why? You're leaving again!" I shouted.

"Because Alice, I want to be able to call you on your birthday without having to worry if you'll even pick up the call. I want to plan to come back on holidays and be able to see you instead of being concerned with ruining everyone else's fucking holiday cheer because I will undoubtedly piss you off somehow!" he yelled back.

"What do you want from me?"

"I want my best friend back. The one that knew me better then I knew myself." His face looked so broken. _Fuck it, I give up._ I sat on the couch and untied the laces of my heels.

"Garrett is out of town anyway," I muttered.

"And that means what Alice?" he demanded.

"You have me for the night…" I told him as I popped the shoes off my feet.

"Only if you want to be here."

I looked at him. "I still love you Jasper…" His face didn't show any sign of anything, it was practically void of emotion, I sighed and looked back down. "Of course I want to be here."

"Are you hungry?" he asked, his voice disturbingly calm.

"Yeah," I chuckled, "I really haven't eaten much in the last few days."

I looked up just as he gave me a rather curt little nod. "You still like Chinese?"

"Of course…" I responded, wondering why he was so… unemotional. He walked away and I could hear him murmuring so I assumed he was on the phone when he came around the corner it confirmed my suspicions.

"Hey Ali Cat, did you want Spring Rolls or Dumplings?" he asked it as if nothing had happened; okay seriously this guy is throwing me for a loop.

"Spring Rolls…" I responded, looking at him curiously as I tucked my feet up under me.

"Kay," he went back around the corner, his murmurs a gentle reminder he was still in the apartment. I couldn't believe he was here, honestly, I couldn't believe I was here. "One order of Mandarin Chicken, Sweet and Sour Pork, Lo Mien and Spring Rolls will be here in forty five minutes." He handed me a water bottle, "Sorry it's all I got besides," he nodded his head a little in the direction of the whiskey bottle.

"Yeah... why do you have that here anyway?" Jasper was never much of a hard liquor type guy. He picked up the bottle and looked at it for a minute, then cleared his throat.

"Helps me sleep?"

"Oh," I pursed my lips, I knew he was lying, but he was hiding it for his own reasons. I no longer had the right to push. "Why…" I took a deep breath, prepared for angry Jasper once more. "Why did that just happen?"

He looked over at the wall; he knew what I was talking about. "Frustration maybe?" he shrugged.

I moved my legs out from under me and stretched them out on the coffee table before I reached over Jasper for the bottle of whiskey. "So… what's on the game plan N.B.?" I looked over at him to see him looking at my legs out of the corner of his eyes. That made me smirk.

"I don't know Ali Cat."

I pulled my knee up, resting my heel on the edge of the couch as I took a swig of whiskey, "How long you staying for?"

He relaxed into the couch before answering. "Uh about a week, I think."

I shifted around so that my legs were resting in his lap before answering. "So you planning on marrying the sk- I mean, your girlfriend?"

He shook his head and gave me a rueful smile, "No, to marry someone that means you love them right?" he picked up my foot and began massaging it.

I scoffed a little, it didn't stop a lot of people from getting married, "Yeah." I could tell he was really appreciating my legs, and maybe it was the alcohol, but I really wanted to fuck with him a little bit. So I moved my leg that wasn't being massaged and lightly rubbed against the bulge in his pants, feeling it harden slightly as my foot moved. "Thank you by the way," I took another pull off the bottle.

He raised an eyebrow at me, "For the liquor, dinner or foot rub?"

"All of the above and…" I took a longer drink, "that was the first sex I have had since you left." _And holy fucking hell that was good_.

"Wow," he shook his head, "how is that even possible?"

I shrugged, "I mean... I've done other things… just... I dunno why I am telling you this."

He laughed. "Well for one, I know that you always seemed to talk when there's alcohol involved... and two I have super skills that make you talk."

I laughed at that and took another drink, "I have skills that make you talk too you know," I began lifting my leg, but he grabbed it before I could get too high.

"I don't recommend you do that unless you want a replay of twenty minutes ago."

I smirked at him, slightly drunk, "I did say I was yours for the night." I bit into my lip a little more, "However whatever happens tonight... it can't... you know." I shrugged.

He nodded, "Yeah I know. Perhaps we'll just see where the night leads us?"

I held the bottle out for him to take a drink, "Agreed." He smiled at me and then shook his head at the bottle. "Why not?"

He shrugged, "Would prefer to have a clear head tonight."

I raised an eyebrow and shook the bottle a little again, "Just one drink to loosen you up?"

He laughed, "Peer pressure," he shook his head as he took it from me and took a long drink.

***~*~*~*May 5****th**** 2005*~*~*~***

Tick, tock, tick, tock.

_Fuck how long can two minutes take?_

I looked at my watch; barely a minute had passed since I peed on the fucking stick.

I don't know what Rosie is going on about, seriously I am not pregnant, I am just stressed out and upset Nerdy Boy broke up with me and left.

I looked at my watch again.

_Longest two minutes in history I tell you._

I mean I can't be pregnant, I've only slept with one guy and we've always been careful.

_Okay, maybe not that one time, but seriously, I would've known by now…right?_

I looked at my watch again.

_Thank fuck_! I moved over to the counter where the test laid and picked it up, one dark pink line and a regular pink line, then looked at the box. It said two lines mean you're pregnant; I looked at my test…

_No.

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_**End note: BWAHAHA they finally did it! Review please!**_


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: All copyrights, trademarked items, or recognizable characters, plots, etc. mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization.**

**K: as I said on twitter, sorry this is late. *fail* Here's NB for you. Also the hotseat questions will be up sometime tomorrow. You still have time to get those questions in!**

**Robs: Woot JPOV... coz y'all know you wanted it :) Thanks for all the love on the last chapter ;) **

**Special thanks to our amazing beta, we love you AMBER!

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**JPOV**

I was just waiting for the moment where I wake up and realize everything was a dream. At least if what had happened less then four hours ago turned out to be a dream, I'd still have some chance of not being a complete dick and fucking Alice against the wall like I had.

_Oh fuck who am I kidding, I would so do that again._

I just couldn't believe things went that far, but I needed to prove to her that I still wanted her.

Who would have though that after all these years, the passion we both had when we were together, was still there. Not only was it still there, but it seemed as if time had made it stronger. Or I could be over thinking things and that was just a standard reaction to her not being with anyone since me.

That was another thing that blew me away. She hadn't been with anyone since me. Was that even possible? I mean, fuck, she's a straight man's dream. Despite her height, she had long, toned legs, sexy curves, and her face... when she smiled, a true Ali Cat smile mind you, it shone brighter then the lighthouses on the bay. Not just her looks though, she was funny, caring, willing to try _anything_.

Hell most guys would kill for a chance just to be near her. Me included.

I got my chance tonight, that's for sure. I was telling her the truth when I told her I wanted her, but I also wanted to try and be friends. That's why I had gotten the Chinese. I hadn't had that since I left Forks, knowing it was her favorite.

I figured we could talk over dinner and maybe find a balance between old flames and old friends.

After convincing her to lay off the whiskey, we started talking about our lives. She told me about college, about living with Rose and Emmett, and about her job. I in turn, told her about the academy and working in the crime lab.

We both side-stepped the past and our present relationships, but it sat in the room like the giant proverbial elephant, looming over us.

I noticed once our food had time to settle that she was starting to get tired, she was curling up closer to me like she used to. I suggested that she take the bed, and I would just sleep on the couch. I should have known she would fight me on that, claiming the couch was too short for me. Even if it was true, I didn't see why she should have to use the couch. She even went as far as threatening to sleep on the couch with me if I continued to deny her request.

So I relented, telling her to go make herself comfortable in the bed while I cleaned up.

I would have laughed at the sight of her going through her bed time routine had things been different between us.

I leaned against the door frame and watched her. She took her time removing her jewelery and carefully set it on the bed side table. Then she finger combed her hair before messing it up again. I chuckled softly watching her, that was a part of the routine I never fully understood.

I thought that after all these years, maybe she'd change something in her habits, more specifically the pillow toss, as I dubbed it. She used to stack her pillows and one by one toss them to the side until she was comfortable, often times stealing mine because she threw one too many. Apparently she hadn't because I stood there and watched as one by one the pillows were tossed to the foot of the bed.

Finally, she settled into the bed and I made my way towards the other side. I removed my khakis before laying down next to her.

There's something strange about laying in bed with your ex. Your first instinct is to wrap your arms around them and pull them close. Then, if you're a nuzzler, you find yourself wanting to kiss her neck before burying your face in her hair. You know exactly how she would react to it. You anticipate the moment she tangles her legs with yours, laces her fingers with your fingers and wait for the soft good night or love you that follows.

But things have changed. You're not that couple anymore. So you lay there awkwardly on your back, willing yourself to think about anything other than holding her, kissing her... touching her... She lies straight as a board on her side, no doubt wondering what your next move will be.

And that's where we were, stuck somewhere between wanting to do something and afraid to cross some imaginary line. She rolled onto her back and exhaled deeply, before holding out her hand as if asking me for something.

"What?" I asked quietly, looking at her hand.

"Your glasses."

"Oh..." I took them off and handed them to her. "I guess I forgot," I said sheepishly.

"It's okay," she said with a small smile. "I guess your girlfriend must not mind huh?"

I turned my head towards her and I could see her looking at me. "I typically wear contacts... I was just being lazy this morning."

"Oh." She shifted a little to place my glasses on the nightstand, "I still think you look hot with them on."

"Thanks. I still think I look like a nerd," I joked.

"Yeah, a nerd with a monster in his pants," she laughed and then froze, looking at me in horror when she realized what she'd said.

I laughed and gently touched her hand. "Don't be embarrassed. It's just me."

She laughed a little unsure, "I know, that's what makes it...hard."

I rolled over to look at her better. "Because of our past?"

She nodded, "And 'cause... I still think about... it... us... stuff."

"I still think about it too," I admitted. "Like just now, before you mentioned my glasses, I was remembering the way I used to hold you before bed and the way you'd giggle and make yourself comfortable..."

"I meant what I said before Nerdy Boy..." She turned her head, her pale green eyes searching my face for something.

I studied her for a moment. She had said she was mine for the night, but just tonight. "Like I never left?" I asked softly.

"Yes," She nodded her head once, before her hands moved lower along her body, her fingers hooking under the hem of the shirt she was wearing.

I moved closer, leaning over her as I cupped her cheek. Slowly I brought my lips to hers, smiling as I saw her eyes flutter shut. I kissed her softly, nibbling on her bottom lip before tracing my tongue along it. She sighed allowing me entrance to her mouth.

As we kissed in a slow and passionate manner, I positioned myself over her better. My hand slid under her shirt, massaging its way to her breast. Once there I cupped and squeezed her, rubbing my thumb along her nipple as I kissed down her throat. She moaned and arched her back, pushing herself closer to me.

"I want to taste you," I whispered in her ear as my other hand reached between us and I slipped a finger into her wetness.

She nodded in response as her hips bucked into my hand, pushing my finger deeper into her.

I took my time, slowly thrusting and curling my finger into her, adding my middle finger while my thumb rubbed gentle circles over her clit. The hand that was groping her, pulled her shirt up, exposing her chest to me and I teased her nipple with my tongue.

Her hands tugged at my hair, fighting on whether to bring me up to her mouth or to keep me where I was.

"Relax," I said softly, before sucking her nipple into my mouth and nibbling on it as my fingers thrust deeper inside of her.

I could hear her whimper and I resisted the urge to smirk. She knew I was just working her up to the good stuff and she wanted it now.

I kissed my way down, her eyes locked on mine as I reached her stomach. I could see the slight panic on her face but as I kissed the marks left by our son, her eyes softened. With each kiss I left a silent apology for being an ass and leaving her when she needed me the most.

I removed my hand from her, making her mutter under her breath but gasp quickly as my tongue replaced the movements of my thumb, licking her clit in slow circles.

Even I'll admit that I can be a bastard and tease the fuck out of her, which is what I did as I flicked my tongue over it and pulling away as she bucked into my face.

I repositioned her legs, sliding them over my shoulders as I pulled her closer to me, moving my tongue deep into her, tasting her and savoring the sweet moans of pleasure she emitted with each twist and curl of my tongue.

Soon I began working faster; feeling her clench as she held my head between her thighs, grinding herself into my face, desperate to get to her peak.

When she did cum, I savored her taste as she relished in my ministrations.

I slowly pulled away, kissing along her inner thigh before getting off the bed and pulling my boxer-briefs off. Reaching for my wallet, I pulled out a condom and watched as she bit her lip in anticipation.

After making sure we were safe, I returned to my position over her. I gently kissed her as my dick pressed against her entrance. Her hands worked their way between us and I had to pull away slightly.

I clicked my tongue at her as I grabbed her wrists in one hand. "Ali Cat… this is about you," I chided her as I held her hands above her head.

"But..." she whined, pouting a little and wiggling her hips eagerly.

I chuckled as I nipped at her lips. "I promise you'll like it," I said in more of a sing song voice than anything.

"I want you to like it too!" she protested, trying to wiggle closer.

I smirked at her as I pushed in slowly, allowing only the head of my dick to enter before pulling out again. "You want that Ali?" I whispered in her ear before sucking on the lobe.

"Yes," she moaned, trying to wiggle out of my grasp. "Please don't tease me Jasper."

With that I pushed fully inside her, watching her as she pushed her head back and moaned. I moved my hips slowly, determined to have her fully enjoy this as I kissed along her collarbones, nipping at them but careful not to leave a mark.

We moved together in slow perfection, as if time never stopped for us over the years. I freed her wrist, the hand that was holding them clasping hers and my other hand cupped her face as I kissed her. Her fingers laced with mine as her other hand gripped my side.

Her leg moved up my side and I felt the heel of her foot dig into my ass as we kissed, pushing me deeper inside of her and making her moan against my lips.

I pulled out and backed away. "Turn around," I told her when she looked at me confused. She bit into her lips as she pulled herself up, quickly tossing her shirt off, and turning onto her hands and knees.

I ran my hand down her spine stopping just above her ass, pulling my hand back and smacking her firmly. She moaned out pushing her backside closer to me.

_I see she still likes to be spanked_, I thought as I rubbed the pink spot on her ivory skin, before smacking her one more time on the other cheek. I watched as her head dropped forward onto her hands and she wiggled her ass at me. "I love it when you spank me N.B." she purred.

That went straight to my dick. "What else Alice?" I asked, spanking her again.

"When you hold me down," her voice was soft, but wanton. "And fuck me hard..."

I leaned over her, one hand sliding around her as my other fisted her hair, pulling on it to bring her ear closer to my lips. "Tell me how you want it Alice," I demanded, my accent heavier with the desire I felt.

"Oh God, Jasper..." she panted, I could feel her heart racing in her chest. "Fuck me like you used to... _please_."

My hand slid down to her clit, where I teased her a bit, rolling it between my fingers before pinching it. "You want it rough baby?"

"Yes," she moaned loud and rolled her head back, resting it against my shoulder.

I let go of her hair, grabbing her hips roughly as I impaled her with my cock. I moved fast and hard, pushing myself deeper into her with each thrust. She was moaning loudly as the sounds of our bodies slapping against each other filled the room.

I saw her trying to put her head onto her hands. "Keep your head up Alice," I said as I continued to pound into her from behind.

Again her head started to dip lower and I wasn't having any of that. I pulled her back; her body flush with mine as I held her wrists against her abdomen with my hand.

"I want to hear you scream," I told her as I scraped my teeth along her neck.

"Oh God…" she moaned, her head falling back against my shoulder.

I continued to move inside her, feeling her tighten around me as she got closer to her peak. Her gasps matched my pants in rhythm as I kissed along her neck and shoulder.

I loosened my grip on her hands and she brought them up to tangle her fingers in my hair as she brought her lips to mine, kissing me hungrily as her body started to shake from her orgasm. I came soon after her, kissing the side of her face, jaw and neck as I came down.

I brought her wrists to my lips, kissing each one before rubbing them. "You okay?" I asked her quietly, hoping I hadn't hurt her.

"I'm fantastic..." she breathed.

I smiled into her hair as I moved us and pulled out. "Want me to get you some water or something?"

"Yeah that'd be awesome..." She smiled wickedly at me, "Then do you wanna do it again?"

I laughed and pulled the condom off. "Hmm... round three sounds like fun," I grinned at her before kissing her. "I'll be right back."

"Okay," She smiled at me and settled into her pillows.

We wound up having rounds three, four and five before she actually fell asleep. I watched her as she slept. She had a small smile on her face, as if she knew something that no one else but her dreams would ever know.

I kissed the crown of her head before tucking the blankets in around us. I was pretty confident I'd be able to sleep now.

**~*~*~* March 4th, 2001 *~*~*~**

Today was Emmett's birthday and Edward decided that as his best friends, we needed to throw him a party to celebrate his eighteenth. I guess things went okay, we had food, music and Emmett was happy.

After the crowd cleared out, the usual bunch of us went down to the basement where we were subjected to Emmett's choices in movies. Ali Cat was smart and went to bed soon after the movie marathon started.

By the time Boondock Saints made an appearance it was my turn to leave. Emmett laughed and called me a pussy for not watching it, but I just didn't get the appeal.

I went up to the living room and sat on the couch looking out the floor to ceiling windows. It was well past midnight and everyone who wasn't in the basement was already sound asleep._ Sleep... must be nice_.

"Are you okay?"

I jumped at the sound of Ali Cat's voice and turned to look at her, but it was dark and I couldn't see shit without my glasses. "Yeah? Just star gazing?"

She came closer and I could see she was wearing some shorts and a tank top. It was a cold night too..."You're a bad liar Jasper... you're not wearing glasses."

_I swear one of these days I'll stop sounding unsure of my answers._

I gave her a sad smile before looking away. "I guess I am. What are you doing up?"

"I was getting a glass of water, and... well, you look sad." I could hear her voice coming closer.

I felt my eyebrows furrow. "You must have the eye sight of a cat then..." I muttered shaking my head.

She laughed a little, "Okay I might've been looking for you."

_She was looking for me?_ "Oh, well you found me." I gave her a thumbs up sign then laughed at my own stupidity.

I felt the couch shift a little as she sat down next to me, "So you wanna come hang out with me instead of hanging out here by yourself?"

"I don't know how much company I'll be..." I admitted softly.

I felt the cushions shift again and looked over to see that she had stood up, "I'd understand if you didn't want to hang out with your best friend's fourteen year old sister... it's pretty lame huh?" She looked away as she played with the hem of her tank.

"No, not lame," I said, standing up. "I'll hang out with you. At least until you fall asleep..." I trailed off giving her a small smile.

"We'll see who falls asleep first." She winked at me, bouncing a little on the balls of her feet as she led me towards the staircase. I grabbed my glasses from the coffee table as we walked past and put them on. _Dear God in heaven, she's wearing those shorts..._

When we got to her room, I closed the door behind me and took in the place. Pink and white were main colors of the room. She had pictures from magazines and of friends and family all over her walls. The over head light was off, but strands of twinkle lights were on, reflecting off the mirrors of her closet doors.

She sat down on her bed, scooting closer to the wall before patting the spot next to her. "What in God's name are you listening to?" I asked her as I sat down. It sounded like the pop music Rose plays when she's trying to irritate me.

"Um," she fumbled around for a second with something on the other side of her before I heard the soothing cords of Incubus's _Drive_, drift through the speakers. "Nothing," she mumbled, looking down at the remote in her hands.

I chuckled and laid back on her pillow. "Look who's the terrible liar now," I teased, pushing her knee.

She looked over at me, cast off from the lights making her eyes sparkle. "Okay, it was *NSync, but I know you hate them..."

"Hate is such a strong word... dislike yes, but this is your room," I took the remote out of her hands and skipped back to the song that was on previously, "Therefore, we listen to your music."

"No, I like your music too," She took the remote back and changed it again before sticking out her tongue at me.

I laughed and held my hands up in surrender. "Alright... alright you win. So what you doing up still?"

She shrugged, "I dunno… I wasn't tired, Emmett just has sucky taste in movies." She smiled at me.

"That he does," I agreed as I pushed my glasses up to rub my eyes. _No sleep in two days was killing me._

"I'm sorry, did you wanna go to sleep?" she asked, tilting her head a little while she looked at me.

I gave her a small smile. "Unless you know the cure for nightmares, I don't think I'm gonna get much sleep."

"What do you have nightmares about?" she asked, scooting a little closer to me.

"My parents," I said softly.

"I'm sorry," Her voice was gentle and she seemed to hesitate for a moment before taking the hand closest to her. Her hand was really small compared to mine, so small in fact that when she laced her fingers with mine, my hand seemed to engulf hers.

"Your dad says it's normal..." I said, shrugging. "He said considering what I saw it's normal to relive it at times."

"It still sucks," She pulled my hand closer to her, resting it against her leg.

"Yeah it does," I agreed, moving closer to her so my head was on the pillow she would use. I looked up at her, watching her as she looked down at our joined hands.

"Do you think... Like, maybe, we could be... um... be friends?" She looked over at me hopeful.

I nodded. "I think we could definitely be friends Ali Cat."

She chewed her lip, "You think maybe... never mind." she shook her head.

"Maybe what?" I asked, tugging on her arm slightly.

"Like, we could be more than friends? Someday?" Her eyes seemed to be looking into my soul.

"Uh..." I started. I honestly didn't know what to say. I mean, sure I've thought about it. After all I've had a crush on her for over a year, but she was Edward's baby sister... "We'll see?" I offered, hoping my answer wouldn't upset her.

"Okay," I could tell that it made her happy, her face seemed to glow with it. "Thank you by the way."

"For what?" I asked.

"For my birthday kiss," She looked at our joined hands again. "I've only ever kissed you."

"Oh! Yeah, no... don't thank me. I'm just sorry I was your first kiss. 'Cause uh... you were mine too," I admitted feeling my neck and ears warm up.

"Why are you sorry? I thought it was perfect." She bit her bottom lip.

"Well, cause it was my first time... and yours and I mean, I'm sure I could have done something better," I shrugged.

She shook her head, I could see even in this low light that she was blushing. "No...uh...no."

I took the remote back from her and turned the music down even more before tugging for her to lay down with me. "You know you can tell me anything right?" I asked her.

She smiled and shook her head, settling in close. "You can tell me anything."

"Deal," I said with a smile.

"You remember that thing you did... in the closet?" she asked after a long quiet moment.

I nodded, remembering the way that I kissed her and touched her, the way she sounded when I did something she liked. "Yeah..." I said softly

"I liked it a lot," She pressed herself closer to me.

"You did huh?" I asked, gently running the back of my finger along the skin of her stomach her tank top exposed, just above her shorts.

"Yeah," She moved so her head was on the same pillow as me. "Did you like it?"

I nodded looking at her. "I did."

"You wanna tell me about your nightmares?" She looked at me and her face was so close to mine I would barely have to move to kiss her.

I shook my head, laughing as our noses rubbed together. "I don't want you to have them too," I explained.

"I'm sorry that you have them," She gave me a small smile. "Maybe if you sleep with me... I can help you?"

"You gonna try to protect me from the monster?" I asked, smiling slightly as I tucked her hair behind her ear.

"I'll try to protect you from your nightmares, what's the worst that could happen?"

"Neither one of us gets any sleep?" I shrugged.

"Exactly," She smiled brightly, "So uhhh.. how are we gonna sleep?"

_Good question. _"Uh... I don't know.. how do you normally sleep? Like me, I usually sleep on my back or side."

"I usually sleep on my side or my stomach."

"Okay... Well... let's try sleeping on our sides... and if that doesn't work I can sleep on the floor so you have the bed?" I offered.

"Okay!" She smiled brightly at me once again and turned so her back was towards me, then scooted back til we were touching. "Is that okay?"

"Yeah, you're fine," I told her as I pulled my glasses off and placed them on her nightstand. I moved closer to her, wrapping my arm around her waist. "Is that okay?" I asked softly.

"Yeah, it's nice," I could hear the happiness in her voice.

I smiled and kissed her shoulder. "Good night Ali Cat."

"Night my Nerdy Boy," she yawned out.

That was the first time in, I honestly don't know how long, I wasn't haunted with the dreams of my past. Who would have thought Ali Cat was right, she protected me from the monsters.

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** End Note: Let us know what you think!**


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: All copyrights, trademarked items, or recognizable characters, plots, etc. mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization.**

**K: Nothing from me, blame the cold meds.**

**Robs: Thanks so much to everyone who added us to their favs and alerts last chapter! Thanks to everyone who reviewed as well! Y'all know we love them! **

**Special thanks to Miss Amber for the betaing, we love yah girl

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**

**APOV**

I was having dinner with Garrett when Jasper called me. At first I tried to ignore the call, Rhett was already a little jealous of our 'friendship' and I was doing everything in my power to not stir up suspicion that we'd done anything since he came back. Because, well... let's face it, I'm a terrible liar. I finally answered when he called the fourth time, giving Garrett an apologetic smile as I answer the phone.

"This better be an emergency." I hissed.

"It's Rosie. She's screaming for you and Emmett passed out and... Fuck Alice, I don't know what to do!" He said in a rush.

"Oh." I gasped, looking over at Garrett, "Rosie's in labor and Em passed out."

Garrett gave me a rather tight lipped smile as he nodded his head. "Go on ahead then baby, I'll get a box to go for you."

"Thank you so much. I love you," I leaned over and kissed him before grabbing my purse and addressing Jasper. "Okay where are you guys at?"

"Northwest Hospital, off one-fifteenth... do you know where that is?" I could hear Rose saying something in the background.

"Yeah, I'll be there in a few," I told him as I clicked the phone shut. I got into my car and began to drive to the hospital quickly, half wondering if Rosalie really wanted me, or if my Nerdy Boy needed me. I knew two days ago that when I left the apartment it had to officially be over for us. I wanted him, I still loved him, but he was leaving and I had a sure thing with Garrett.

And I loved Garrett. They say that you never truly get over your first love and I think that's what was going on here. And I think even though Nerdy Boy said he wasn't in love with his girlfriend, he must've been or else he wouldn't be running back to her. I don't really understand it all... I was so conflicted and my thoughts kept leading me every which way, it was all just a lot for me to take in.

There was only two things I knew; first, he got mad enough at my claims about him not caring about me that he fucked me against the wall. And second, he made love to me... something that only occasionally happened between us and usually left no question in my mind as to how he felt.

And as much as I hated to admit it, I couldn't stop thinking about the sex, the kissing, the way he touched me, the way he felt naked against me... it was all such a sensory overload and one that I enjoyed very much. I haven't orgasmed like that in years... five years to be exact.

The good thing about first loves, they know exactly what makes you tick. When I came down from my final orgasm I quite literally passed out. It felt so good to be around him again, like for the past five years I had been nothing but a shell and the minute he came back I was full again. Somehow mulling this over in my head made the trip easier and the next thing I knew I was on the elevator going up to the labor and delivery unit.

As soon as the doors opened and I stepped out my eyes locked with a pair of familiar gray ones and I walked over to him. "How's Rosie?"

"Scared," he said chewing his lip. "C'mon I'll take you to her."

I followed him, paying much more attention than was proper to the way the jeans he wore hugged his ass. It was insane how hot he got while he was down south. When we walked into the room, however, I forgot all about Jasper... and his ass. Rosalie looked terrified.

"Hey Rosie, what's going on?" I asked softly as I stood beside her and wiped the hair that stuck to her forehead away.

"It hurts," she said, wincing. "And fucking Emmett is no help," she growled out, glaring at the passed out figure of Emmett in the recliner.

"You want some painkillers?" I asked, looking over in the direction of the whiteboard the nurses wrote their names on.

"They can't do spinal cause she uh..." Jasper said clearing his throat.

"Cause they're evil!" Rose shouted in the direction of the door.

"They only use spinals for C-sections because it numbs you completely. They said they won't give you an epidural?" I turned and asked Rosie.

She shook her head. "No cause in my stupid birth plan I denied it if I was past a certain point."

I scoffed a little and shook my head at her, "Well then Rosie, you remember Lamaze?"

She nodded. "You really think that's gonna help?" she asked me.

"Just focus on breathing," I said in a encouraging voice.

She nodded and started to do her breathing exercises before gripping my hand. "It's too soon Ali... six more weeks," she said softly.

"I know honey," I rubbed a soothing circle into the back of her hand.

"It will all be okay, Ryan was early," I gave her a reassuring smile.

Her eyes darted over to Jasper before looking back at me, as if asking me if he knew. I nodded my head slightly, "But not everything." I whispered, smiling a little.

"Good..." Her smile matched mine.

Jasper cleared his throat again. "I'm gonna see if there's enough smelling salts to get his ass up," he said nodding in Emmett's direction before kissing Rose's forehead. "It'll be okay Sis." He looked at me and smiled nervously at me. "Thanks Ali Cat..." he said softly before leaving us.

I gave him a tight smile before turning my attention to Rosalie. "How are you feeling now?"

"A little better. Still hurts like a bitch, but I'm not as freaked out as I was now that your here." She studied me a moment before snickering and shaking her head. "I'm gonna kill him."

"Kill who?" I asked just as another contraction hit her, making her squeeze my hand so hard I was fairly sure she broke something. Once it subsided I asked her again.

"Jasper," she said, raising her eyebrow at me.

I felt my face flush, "Why?"

She shook her head. "I'm in labor not stupid. I know when my best friend has been fucked by my brother."

I tried to keep the grin off my face. "Well yeah, back in the day," I smiled at her, trying to hide what we did.

"Puh-lease," she breathed out. "I know that look on both of your faces. It's the same one ya'll used to get when you had just did something. You've got it now. I wouldn't have even noticed it unless I saw the look you both had."

"What look is that?" I asked, curious as to what she meant.

She leaned her head back on to the bed. "You know, the I want to look at him but I can't look. So you do everything except look him in the eyes cause you're afraid all will spill out?"

I shifted my gaze away from her and shrugged. I never realized I did that.

"Well whatever, I'm gonna kill him anyhow," she said, shifting in the bed. That was the last we spoke of it, Jasper came back with a nurse and I knew Rosalie was watching us which made me infinitely more aware of Nerdy Boy and what he was doing. The nurse woke Emmett up, and made him sit in the chair next to the bed, lest he have another "feinting moment".

The nurse he brought in informed us that Rose was dilated to ten and soon it would be time to push. Rose panicked, the fear of the pain and the baby being too early overriding every other feeling she had right at that moment. I hugged her and let her cry until they told her it was time to start pushing. I knew how she felt.

*~*~*October 22nd 2005*~*~*

Today was the worst day of my life. Well, the second worst, and yet it was one of the greatest. I gave birth to my son seven weeks early... he was four pounds seven ounces and seventeen inches of lung capacity and shrieks. They didn't expect that from him. They doubted he was going to be able to breathe on his own.

And then, I signed away my rights, I gave him to his parents... the people who wanted him so badly after years of not being able to have a child of their own.

I gave up my child. Mine and Jasper's child, I let the door shut as my final visitors of the night left before I broke down into hysterical sobs. The pain of Jasper leaving me ripping through me all over again. I had nothing of his left. He left and with him, he took everything... everything but the child he gave me. And now, he was gone too.

I don't understand why and I don't think I ever will, but I found myself doing the one thing I made everyone else swear that they wouldn't do. I was picking up the hospital phone, taking the piece of paper that had his number scrawled across it and punching the numbers in.

I needed to talk to the one person who could make this okay, I needed him to make me feel better. In my moment of weakness I needed him. I put the phone up to my ear and steadied myself as I listened to the faint ringing from the receiver.

"Hello?" His voice was rather gruff, like he'd just woke up. I inhaled a little and opened my mouth to speak, but nothing came out. He cleared his throat, "Hello?" he asked again, sounding a little annoyed.

_He's probably in bed with some girl he met down there,_ I thought as the tears that were threatening to escape, finally did and even though I was trying very hard not to, a sob finally came from my throat.

I could hear the springs of his bed squeak as he moved. "Alice?" he whispered as if unsure of it himself.

That very minute I could no longer breathe, the pain in my chest was too much to bear, I tried to say his name, it was strangled by my sobs though and finally just hung up the phone before I laid sideways on the bed and let my sadness wash over me.

Eventually my tears stopped flowing as much as they had been and I made my way to the shower stall, climbing in and sitting on the little bench before turning the water as hot as I could stand it. I leaned my head against the wall staring into nothingness as the hole in my chest seemed to ache and reach for something that wasn't there. I was empty, nothing, worthless and spent.

I gave myself to Jasper, did anything and everything he wanted and he tossed me away like a broken toy. That is what I was, broken and a toy to him. I always knew it, but I was somehow content in this simple fact until he left. And now, I was nothing, had nothing and felt nothing. I couldn't even cry anymore.

There was a knock on the door followed by Rose's voice. "Alice?"

_Rosie_, I tried to say her name but my throat felt like something was stuck in it so I groaned instead.

"I'm coming in," she warned before opening the door. I didn't even move myself. "Hey you," she said, closing the door behind her.

I looked over at her through hazy eyes. "He left," I croaked.

She looked at me with sad eyes. "I thought you wanted to give Ryan away?" she said softly.

"I did, he's gonna be much happier..." I closed my eyes and realized I was wrong about not being able to cry anymore. "He's gonna have a much better life than I can give him."

"Ali... That's not..." She put the lid down on the toilet before sitting. "I'm not gonna pretend to know what you're going through, but don't sell yourself short okay?"

I shook my head, "He's better off Rosalie...this isn't about him. I'm happy that he's going to have a good life."

"Jasper," she said simply.

I felt my heart lurch in my chest at the sound of his name and cried harder, "I'm sorry Rose."

She sighed before standing up and reaching to turn the water off. She stepped into the area and wrapped a towel around me. "Don't apologize, Alice. He was an asshole to you. I understand you being devastated."

I shook my head, "I knew all along Rosie," I whispered as I stood rather mechanically and walked over to the toilet, pushing the lid up before I sat.

Rose just shook her head and turned her back, giving me some privacy. I quickly dressed myself, pulling on comfortable clothes instead of the hospital issued gown and hobbled forward. "Do you miss him?" I asked her quietly, my voice horse and broken.

She shrugged. "Just 'cause he's my brother, doesn't mean I knew him... hard to miss him ya know?"

"I miss him," I said quietly, but she may have had a point. I think out of everyone he knew me the best...and he hurt me the worst when he left.

"You two were always closer..." she said softly.

"Why Rosalie, I just wanna know why?" I asked her miserably as I climbed back into the hospital bed. I had asked her this many times, and the answer never changed.

"I don't know Alice," she said sadly as she lifted the blanket up to put it over my legs.

I looked at my lap and found myself growing silent yet again. In the past few months I spent with Rosalie I had spilled almost everything that had happened between her brother and me. She was my biggest ally during this whole scandal. We hid it from my parents, my brother, my best friend and even Emmett until about ten hours ago. Then when I went into labor and freaked out, all our planning went to hell.

Not that Rosalie was completely willing all the time; she thought I should tell everyone, she thought I should keep Ryan; she thought I should tell her brother. I could never tell him because I knew what he would do. Jasper may have left me, but he was still a good person, if he knew I was pregnant he would come back to make an honest woman of me. I did not want to trap him.

He had spent long enough humoring me, it was time I set him free to live his own life. Maybe someday I could talk to him and find out what went wrong, but today wasn't that day.

~*~oOo~*~

A shrill cry broke me from my memories. I smiled as they put the mewling baby under the warming lamps; she was crying... or squeaking rather, so it was a good sign. I looked at Rosalie and smiled, "Payton's gonna be just fine."

Rose matched my smile. "Good..." she said with a soft laugh.

"She's beautiful Rosie, I can already tell," I smirked a little and leaned down to her ear. "All I have to say is thank God she looks like you."

Rose beamed at that. "Thanks Ali."

"You want me to go get anyone?" I asked as I looked over at Emmett who was standing by the baby.

She chewed on her lip and nodded. "My brother please?"

I nodded my head and smiled slightly before leaving the room and walking towards the waiting area where Jasper sat, his hands fisting his hair. "Nerdy Boy are you alright?" I asked as I crouched next to him.

He slowly looked up as he cleared his throat. "Is she... are they okay?"

"They're gonna be just fine," I smiled at him. There was no way to know for sure, but I had a really good feeling about it all. "What's wrong?" I asked.

He shook his head. "I just pushed her too far... I should have just let her have her say and left it at that." He said scrubbing his face with his hands, pushing his glasses up. "And you're totally showing me your panties Ali Cat," he mumbled behind his hands.

_Ohmigawd._ I stood up quickly. "I'm really sorry Jasper," I whispered, very embarrassed.

He lowered his hands and gave me a half smile. "Sorry about the fight with Rose, or for the show?"

I felt my face flush, "For the show, I know you didn't want to see that."

He looked down, "Right. Sorry for embarrassing you."

I shook my head, "You didn't embarrass me, I mean you've seen more of me under the guise of scientific experiment than I've seen of me. So really..." _It's not my body._ I finished in my head and then internally smacked myself.

He shook his head smiling slightly. "Yeah..."

"So do you wanna see your new baby niece?" I asked him, holding my hand out.

"Yeah," he said with a nod before standing up and taking my hand in his.

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**End note: Reviews are love.**


	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer: Honestly K is too tired to come up with something witty or professional for this, but you know the drill. We aren't SM. We're just two girls that love Alice.**

**K: Hmm… wonder if NB has stock in Nike… js.**

**Robs: Well, last chapter was a cute, albeit, heart wrenching chapter... thanks so much for all the support we've gotten for this fic.**

**Special thanks as always to Amber she is awesome.

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**JPOV**

I was completely consumed by guilt. Guilt over what I had done to Alice five years ago, the guilt of taking her as if she was mine again the other night, and most of all for what I had done to Rose.

Emmett warned me to keep my cool. Just let her have her peace and be done with it.

Honestly, I had every intention of doing just that. Until she accused me of ruining everything Alice had built, all the progress she had made, and for making things worse on her.

I should have listened to Emmett. Rose was just hormonal and doing what she did best. Standing up for Alice. I just pushed too far.

Rose says that it wasn't my fault Payton was early. But let's face it, if I didn't cause the undue stress, Payton would still happily be in her mother's womb right now. Not in the hospital. Not away from her mommy.

My niece was beautiful. She was tiny, but a fighter like her parents. You could she seemed to fill what ever Emmett and Rose thought they had missing in their relationship.

And tonight we were celebrating. What exactly? I don't even know. All I know is Edward called me, insisting that I shower and shave, then meet him and the rest of the gang at our favorite restaurant.

Of course _he_ was here. Mr. Armani suit himself. Bella hissed in my ear to be nice as she went to sit with Edward. _I was going to be a perfect gentleman damn it_.

Naturally the only two chairs left for them to occupy once they got here, were the ones next to me. I mentally fist pumped when Alice took the seat directly to my right, leaving Gary -_Damn Garrett_- on the other side of her.

I smiled politely as she sat down, even gave him a handshake and was cordial. I could see the unspoken questions in Alice's eyes but now wasn't the time for explanations.

The conversations floated around, jumping from various topics, everyone talking at once.

It almost felt like old times.

Some time into the gathering, while everyone was involved in discussions, Alice took it upon herself to be flirty. Not in the sense that everyone at the table would know what she was doing. Oh no, Ali Cat was far too good for that. I felt something brush against my hand and glanced over to see Alice smiling coyly at me before turning back to Edward who was talking about some guy he busted. Her fingertips ran along my wrist to my palm, then down to the tips of my fingers before she moved her hand to just brush the back of my hand against the back of hers.

I smiled back at her, moving my hand so it laid flat, palm up, just as she repeated her actions. She shifted slightly in her seat, giving the appearance of crossing her legs, but moving her body closer to mine. Now instead of brushing her fingertips along my wrist, hand and fingers, she centered her attention on my palm; dragging slow circles into it with her nails.

_She couldn't possibly mean that..._ I thought, knowing how when we were younger, that was code for 'alone time, now'.

Deciding that I was going to follow her silent instructions - _more like my wishful thinking, probably_ - I decided to do something daring.

"Hey Garrett, do you mind if I steal your beautiful girlfriend for a dance? I promise to return her," I smiled politely.

"Uh..." Garrett looked at Alice who nodded like it was ok, "Sure..." he said finally looking up at me.

"Thanks buddy." I could hear Emmett and Edward snicker as I pushed back from the table and helped Alice from her seat.

She scoffed when we got onto the dance floor and wrapped her arms around my neck, "This song is pretty fitting, don'tcha think?"

I wrapped my arms around her waist and smiled. "You think so?" I asked.

She nodded, looking up at me as we danced, "Yeah, you don't?"

"No, I could see it," I agreed. Although I was certain her brothers wouldn't buy the just friends story if they knew what had happened.

She smiled a little and rested her head against my chest, swaying to the beat of the music.

"You really think everyone there thinks we'd be the perfect pair?" I asked after listening to the song as we moved.

"They used to," she murmured.

"Hey," I said gently to get her attention. She looked up at me her big jade colored eyes meeting mine. "You're happy right?"

"Is anyone ever truly happy? I thought when you grew up, your heart died?" she half-joked, giving me a sad smile.

I shook my head and smiled at her. "Nah, don't'cha know? Your heart goes dormant until the one you want is around. Then it feels like you've ingested a bunch of methamphetamines."

She blushed a little averting her eyes away.

"Hey," I laughed moving my face near hers so she couldn't look away. "Don't hide Ali Cat, it's just me."

"It's always you..." she mused with a sad smile.

I don't know what came over me, maybe it was hearing her say that or the look in her eyes, but I pressed my lips to hers. I expected her to push me away, after all her boyfriend was on the other side of the restaurant. But she didn't. Her hands slid off my shoulders, one fisting the fabric of my tie as the other held on to my bicep, holding me closer.

My tongue traced her bottom lip, making her sigh against my mouth, giving me access.

**~*~*~*March 20th 2004~*~*~**

She moaned against my lips and I pulled away slightly, "Fuck NB, harder, I'm so close..." she panted, her nails digging into my sides.

I grunted in response, lifting her leg high on my side as I pounded into her. "Fuck Alice..." I panted, moving my lips down her throat.

"Oh shit..." she repeated over and over again, her voice was so husky, I wanted to hear more of it, I nibbled on her neck, making her arch her back.

I reached down to where our bodies joined, rubbing her clit fast as I moved deeper into her. She gasped and brought her hand above her to place it on the wall and pushed herself closer to me.

"You like that don't you baby?"

"Oh my God," she moaned, her eyes rolling into the back of her head.

Just then I heard the door open. "Fuck," I said slightly panicked and in one movement grabbed the blanket to cover us and tried to hide Ali Cat with my body.

Emmett came walking in and sniffed the air, "Whoa it smells like sex in here!" He gave a deep booming laugh. "Holy crap Jay, who the fuck is that? Where the fuck is Ali baby? Did you hurt her? Cause I swear to-"

"Emmett," I hissed. _How the fuck do I explain this. _"Alice is fine... trust me."

"Uh... hi Em," Ali Cat squeaked.

Emmett looked at us wide eyed, finally clueing in to what was going on. "Holy... uh..." His mouth opened and closed a few times like a fish on dry land. "Um. Imma wait out there," he hooked his thumb towards the door. "When you're uh... done... Jay... come out and talk to me...okay?" He left and shut the door behind him.

"I'll make this up to you," I whispered to Ali Cat, she nodded giving me a rather large pout.

_Yep, best friend walking in on you ready to kick your ass, definite mood killer._

"Sorry," I kissed her quickly before getting off of her.

After making myself presentable, I went into the dorm hallway where Emmett stood waiting. "Don't give me that look," I warned him shaking my head.

"What look?" he asked, crossing his arms and leaning against the wall.

"That stupid ass look you get when you want to give me shit about something."

"I can't believe you were balls deep in Ali baby!" He kept his voice at an amused whisper.

"Fuck, I guess I can't call her Ali baby anymore huh?"

I rolled my eyes. "Why does that surprise you so much?" I hissed, keeping an eye out for any signs of Edward.

He shrugged, "I just never expected you to have enough balls to go for it."

I rubbed the back of my neck. "Yeah... uh... can you do me a favor and not tell anyone... _including_ Rose or Edward?"

"Why?" he asked, looking confused.

"Because honestly... I don't want a repeat of what happened to Felix." Not saying that Edward is a violent person by nature. He would just do anything to protect his little sister, and lets face it, blood is thicker than water.

"I don't think he'd really hurt you dude, you're his boy...you know?" Emmett explained, still looking confused.

"Yeah, but Ali is his sister... I just don't want to hurt her and put her in a situation where she'd have to choose between us."

Emmett shrugged, "Okay I won't tell anyone, but I mean... you really think you two can keep it a secret forever?"

I shrugged. "We've managed to keep it under wraps this long. Then again, most people knock before walking through a closed door..." I teased punching him in the arm.

"Sorry, I thought at worst you two would be watching porn," Emmett snickered. "Apparently you've moved on from that."

I rolled my eyes at him. "What did you want anyway?"

"Rosalie wanted me to see if you two wanted to go out to dinner with us... but I can see you are otherwise..." he smirked, "occupied."

I shook my head and laughed. "I owe Ali Cat something... rain check?"

"For sure man," He gave a nod of his head. "Oh, and lock the door."

I laughed and nodded my head. "Will do," I said as I walked into the room. After I made sure to lock it, I turned to face Alice.

She was leaning against the headboard with the sheet tucked in around her. I walked to the foot of the bed, getting ready to continue our earlier activity when I noticed the smile on Ali Cat's face. I tilted my head to the side wondering what she was up to when she suddenly pulled the sheet down to flash me.

"How was your talk?" she asked, wiggling before she pulled the sheet back up.

I laughed and pulled the sheet away from her. "Might as well let me see all of you," I teased.

"And it was educational I suppose."

"Oh really? How so?" she asked, spreading her legs and smirking at me.

I crawled onto the bed, running my nose along her knee. She knew how distracted I got when it comes to her legs. "What was the question?" I asked, placing kisses along her inner thigh.

"How was it educational?" she asked, giggling.

"Apparently no one thought I had the balls to make a move on you," I smirked and nipped at her thigh.

"Mmmm, if only they knew," she giggled again, spreading her thighs a little wider.

I nodded, running my tongue along her skin. "Beautiful... tasty... thighs..." I looked up to see her biting her lip.

**~*~*oOo~*~*~**

The sound of someone clearing their throat snapped me back to reality. Alice gasped and jumped back, bumping into a very angry looking Garrett.

_Shit, how long were we kissing?_

"Are you two done..._ dancing?"_ he asked in a firm tone.

"I'm sorry Rhett," Alice whispered.

"Yeah... sorry man. Got lost in the moment I guess." I tried to give him an apologetic smile but judging from the way his jaw muscles flexed, it didn't work.

"Let's go eat dinner now..." Garrett spoke to only Alice, throwing the occasional glare in my direction. Alice nodded and walked with him, not even looking back at me over her shoulder.

I walked behind them, ignoring the amused looks from my best friends. A part of me felt like a scolded puppy, while another part of me felt oddly smug.

I just shook my head at myself. Of course I was smug... Somewhere deep down Alice still loved me. After they passed him, Edward held up his fist to congratulate me. I smirked and pounded his fist with mine before attempting to look remorseful again.

Of course, I could be wrong. If she still loved me, why would she chose him?

_Because you're leaving again..._

I took my seat between Alice and Esme. Esme doing her best to hide her amused smirk with her napkin. Once Alice sat down, she ignored me for a bit. Which was fine truthfully. I've done so much to hurt her that the last thing I wanted to do was ruin her chance at happiness.

Rose started talking about some of the crazy things we had done as kids, easing the tension at the table. I was grateful when she started talking about the time we turned the Cullen's staircase into our own little theme park, that she left out the bit of information about Ali Cat riding down on the mattress with me. It was during the talk about riding our bikes into the river when I felt Alice slide her hand into mine, our fingers intertwining.

I smiled and squeezed her hand slightly, enough to let her know that I would be here. I don't know when the decision came to my head, but in that moment, there was a inkling of hope that maybe, just maybe I could fix things and we could get back to us.

Garrett stood and smiled politely at everyone sitting at the table. "We have an announcement to make," he said, grabbing Alice's hand and pulling her up to stand next to him just as she let go of my hand.

I quickly glanced at Edward to see he looked just as confused as I felt. Rose just shrugged. _The fuck?_

"What are you doin'?" Alice asked in a whisper, Garrett simply smiled in response.

"We're gettin' married!" he announced and Alice flashed her pearly whites at everyone... everyone, but me.

I felt as if a vice grip had captured my heart and squeezed as hard as it possibly could without killing me. She was getting married... _to him... I'm too late...

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	16. Chapter 16

**Disclaimer: All copyrights, trademarked items, or recognizable characters, plots, etc. mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization.**

K- I know I'm behind on the blog, I promise to catch up soon!

Robs- Alice's chapter... and it's early! ;) Hope you enjoy her thoughts

Thanks as always to our beautiful beta Amber *kisses*

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**APOV**

Jasper kissed me, and Garrett caught us. I felt guilty that Garrett caught us, but I was also confused. That kiss told me I still loved Jasper, there was still that chemistry between us even without the sexual tension, I mean, I guess the tension was still there but we'd definitely resolved it the other night.

That kiss was just different, it told me that not only did I still love Jasper and it was definitely more than the sex. But now I was sure he still loved me too.

And by that I mean not the first love you haven't gotten over kind of love. Yep, it's safe to say right now I am sitting between a rock and a hard place, well no actually I was sitting between Nerdy Boy and Rhett, but you get what I mean.

I held Garrett's hand with my right hand; it was safe, comfortable, reliable, trustworthy. I held Jasper's hand with my left; passionate, sexy, unpredictable, protective. Jasper's thumb grazed the skin on the back of my hand which made me look over at him and smile, he smiled right back, his eyes saying things his lips dared not repeat. I felt a twinge of hope and decided I should talk to Garrett, put off the engagement... figure all of this out.

I looked over just as Garrett smiled brightly at me, and announced happily to the table that we had an announcement to make. He pulled me up out of my chair to stand beside him, I quickly let go of Jasper's hand so that no one would see that we had been holding hands.

I was confused, what was Garrett talking about? "What are you doin'?" I asked as quietly as I possibly could, Garrett smiled at me, but something was a little off in his eyes.

"We're getting married!" He blurted out as I smiled at everyone, trying to hide the confusion I felt at this moment. _Dear Lord why did he have to announce it now of all times?_ I just decided to postpone things, now I couldn't, I didn't want people to think badly of me for having second thoughts about someone who loved me as much as Garrett did over a guy who left with without a second thought five years ago.

Someone who moved on so quickly when I was still nursing my broken heart.

***~*~* July 4th 2007 *~*~***

I combed my hair into a ponytail, high on the back of my head and looked at myself in the mirror.

_Disgusting. Yeah, he'll really want you lookin' like this._

I sighed and began putting on a little make-up before pulling on the nice wrap dress I had purchased just for this occasion. Unfortunately, I still had forty pounds to lose since having Ryan. I hated the way it made me look, mainly because it was in all the worst places.

I chewed my lip as I regarded myself in the mirror. Today was the day I was going to get some answers, I pulled the slip of paper from my purse that Rosalie had written down Jasper's new address on, clutching it in my hand as I walked out of the hotel room and into the humid Tennessee air.

It was one of those days where the younger, more energetic me would've walked or skipped happily to his new place, but now I was talking a cab, I didn't have the energy or the motivation to walk.

Jasper now lived in a three story brick building, if the numbers were correct he lived in a second floor unit. I studied the address for a moment before climbing up the worn wooden stairs, grasping the iron handrail and slowly walking towards his apartment. The door I was headed for opened and I stopped all forward movement when I saw a dark haired woman walk out just ahead of Jasper... my Nerdy Boy... and their hands were linked. He wasn't looking in my direction at all, if he even so much as moved his head to see ahead of him he would've seen me, but the lady he was with distracted him.

It felt like someone gripped my heart in their fist and was holding tightly as I saw him look at her and they began to laugh, I could see the happy twinkle in his eye even from where I was standing. I ducked into a darkened corner, not wanting either of them to see me while I watched them.

_I am such a masochist._

After locking the front door the lady said something to him and he pinned her up against the wall, giving her the sexy look that I always thought was just for me before kissing her savagely. I took a shaky breath and tried to look away, not wanting to see anymore.

~*~*oOo~*~

Later, I found myself sitting at a booth inside of Applebees, torturing myself some more. They sat awfully close to each other and he was letting her feed him fries.

_Why am I doing this?_ I thought idly as I slurped a little of my milkshake.

_Because you have to talk to him._

I watched as he reached into his pocket, put a phone up to his ear, listened for a bit and after a few nods of his head he kissed his companion and left quickly. Walking right by me as if I didn't even exist. His scent, however, clung to me. I bit my lip and closed my eyes, enjoying the little bit of him that was left as I let the memories we had created wash over me.

I heard the bench across me creak and opened my eyes to see Jasper's companion settling in the booth across from me. She was beautiful, clearly Mexican in descent with large dark eyes, thick black hair and skin several shades darker than mine.

"Hi," I said, sounding as startled as I felt.

"Hi," she said with a kind smile. "What kind of shake did ya get?"

"Um... strawberry." I looked at her curiously.

"Good choice, but I prefer the vanilla," she laughed. "Sorry, I hate eating in places like this alone and well, I saw you were alone too. I'm Kayla," She reached her hand out for me to shake.

I took it, "Alice..." I said with a small smile. _And she was nice. Damn N.B. for dating chicks I can't bring myself to hate._

"Nice to meet you. So what brings ya to Tennessee, Alice?"

I laughed a little and looked at my shake. Of course she could tell I wasn't from around here. "It's a long story..." I shook my bowed head.

"A boy?" she asked.

I nodded, "He left one day... didn't tell me why... I really needed him at the time, but I was too stubborn to come down here right away..." I swallowed hard, trying to clear the lump that had crept up my throat.

"That sucks... How long since he left?"

"Um... two years," I chewed my lip. I knew it had been a long time, but I never stopped loving him.

She shook her head. "I'm sorry, by the looks of it he hurt ya bad," She gave me a sad smile.

I nodded my head a little, I wasn't sure if I should tell her, but something inside me told me to give it a try. "It was Jasper," I stated, meeting her eyes.

"My Jasper?" she asked quietly.

That vice squeezed again on my heart when I heard her say 'my', I rubbed my chest absentmindedly and nodded my head, "The guy you were here with, yeah."

"Oh wow..." she breathed. "I had a feeling you were her, but I never thought..." She shook her head.

"What?" I asked, confused by pretty much everything she just said.

"When you said your name, I had a feeling you were his Alice," she gave me a small smile. "I've heard a lot about you and your brother."

"So he talks about us?" My voice cracked despite my best efforts. She nodded. "What does he say?" _Glutton. For. Punishment. _

"He talks about growing up with y'all. How your brother and his best friend were always up to no good and how his sister and you were really tight."

"Oh. So... nothing else?" I chewed my lip.

She looked down at the table and shook her head. "No... sorry," she said softly.

I nodded, feeling tired and sad. "It's not your fault..." I sighed. "I hope you're happy with him... and that you make him smile, okay?" I was being earnest, I meant what I said. I pulled a twenty out of my purse, all I had gotten was the shake so I was fairly certain it would be more than enough to cover it, and placed it on the table.

She looked up and nodded. "I know I don't have tell you this but, he's a really great guy. Looks out for people ya know?"

I nodded and chewed my lip, blinking back tears, "That was the problem I think..." I tried to force a smile.

"Yeah..." She reached in her pocket to look at her phone and sighed. "I gotta go... it was nice meeting you Alice."

"Nice to meet you too," I said as I walked out of the restaurant behind her.

It was time to go home, I didn't need to torture myself anymore, I already had the answers I needed.

~*~oOo~*~

Everyone flittered around Garrett and I, congratulating us and asking about wedding details, wanting to know the date, wanting to see the ring, wanting to know who was going to be involved. The entire time I wouldn't look at Jasper, I didn't want to see his face, I knew that if I did I might do something really stupid.

I saw Jasper move out of the corner of my eye, heading for Garrett. He shook his hand and congratulated him, before making his way to me.

"Congratulations Ali Cat..." He said softly.

I blinked back a tear, it was over, he was leaving, I could see it in his eyes. "Thanks Nerdy Boy," I whispered back.

He cupped my cheek, wiping the tear from under my eye with his thumb. "You deserve to be happy Ali..." He gave me a sad smile before kissing me on the cheek and turning to leave.

I rubbed the center of my chest, it was a habit I had picked up when he left, trying to ease the pain that grasped my heart as I watched him go. "Alice?" I turned to see Garrett's perfect smile and couldn't help but smile in return. "You okay?" he asked, wrapping his arm around my shoulders and pulling me close to his chest. He smelled like sandalwood, it was a nice, comforting smell, I nodded my head as he placed a kiss on the crown of my head. "I love you," he murmured.

"I love you..." _Just not as much as him.

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	17. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer: All copyrights, trademarked items, or recognizable characters, plots, etc. mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization.**

**K: So how many of y'all think NB ran again?  
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**Thanks to the awesome Amber, We love you babe!  
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**JPOV**

"We're engaged," his words echoed in my ears.

I couldn't look at her. I couldn't let her see how much it hurt to hear that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with someone else. But I couldn't look at my friends either. They had to have known. Surely she would have told Rose or Edward.

I could hear everyone talking, congratulating them, asking them about details and I suddenly felt claustrophobic. I needed to get out of here.

I stood up and made my way to the happy couple, willing myself not to do something stupid like deck him and drag her out by her hair and claim her as mine. After all, she made her choice. What was I expecting after all I had done to her.

The minute I saw the tear escape from her beautiful eyes, I felt like I was back in that damned gym, breaking her heart again.

"You deserve to be happy," I told her before kissing her goodbye. I couldn't be here for her. I didn't want this to happen and for once I wasn't about to be the one to keep her from being happy.

It was for the best.

I had almost made it out the door of the restaurant when I was shoved up against the wall. "The fuck?" I asked looking to see my two best friends glaring at me.

"You are not thinking about leaving without saying goodbye again are you?" Edward's voice was like ice.

"We know you too well man," Emmett shook his head, his hand keeping me firmly against the wall.

"I said goodbye to her. It's over." I said trying to shake Emmett off.

"No, it's not," Edward shook his head. "We won't allow you to pussy out of everything this time."

"She's getting married Edward! She made her choice! Damn it Emmett, let go!"

"No!" Emmett shouted back, "I may not be the brightest fucking crayon, but I saw the chemistry between you and Ali, that shit, you can't deny it... come on bro, you really think that you can't get her to change her mind?"

"What if she only said yes because he's safe, because she knows he won't leave her? You gonna prove her right by doin' exactly what she expects you to do?" Edward asked, crossing his arms and giving me a pointed glare.

"Chemistry or not Emmett, it ain't gonna happen. She's got him and I got Kelly," I addressed Emmett first. "And fuck you Cullen! What do you expect me to do? Drop my career and move back? Follow her like a damned love sick fool again? Because that got me where last time?"

"Yep, and we all know how happy you are with Kelly..." Emmett murmured shaking his head.

"Let go of him, Em." Emmett did as he was instructed and before I could say anything I was shoved up against the wall, this time a very angry looking Edward was in my face. "You are the stupid motherfucker who left, do not blame any of that shit on my baby sister. You got me?"

"Yeah," I breathed. _I wasn't blaming her._

"I do not want that shit-for-brains-piece-of-shit to be my brother-in-law," Edward's voice was so quiet I could barely hear him. "But if I have to watch this shit happen, then you best believe I expect your skinny white ass to watch this fucking ship sink with me."

"You think I want her to marry him?" _God why do I sound like I'm seventeen again?_ "I don't! I want it to be me, Ed! I just don't want to step in on her happiness," I said defeated.

"Do you still love my sister?" he asked, his eyes shiny and sad.

"I never stopped loving her Ed..."

"Then I'll let you in on a little secret," He loosened his grip on my shirt. "The first time I have seen her genuinely smile in five years was the day I brought you to her office. She ain't happy, she wants to be and she's trying, but she's not really happy without you." With that Edward let go and took a step back.

I sighed and leaned my head against the wall. "So what are you saying? Stay here and what? Watch her get married to some money flaunting prick? Break up her engagement? Jesus Edward, you know I can't do that."

Edward regarded me quietly, "Why not?"

"Because what if it doesn't work? What if it turns out he's better for her than I am?"

Edward scoffed and shook his head, "You plan on fucking a stripper at your bachelor party Jazz? Have you made Alice feel insecure about herself?"

I felt my eyebrow raise at the mention of the stripper. "I'm sure I've done a lot more damage." _Why am I fighting this?_

"You really want her to marry someone else Jay? Someone she doesn't love?" Edward looked confused while Emmett's brow furrowed.

"How do you know she doesn't love him?" I all but shouted at them. "Honestly about fifteen minutes ago, I would have agreed with you two, but she chose him. Not me. If anything me coming back here has made things worse for her. Christ, I helped her cheat on her fiancé!"

_Oh fuck..._

Edward's jaw fell open while Emmett looked merely surprised. "You two did the horizontal mambo?" Emmett asked, sounding completely amused. I rubbed the back of my neck while nodding, waiting for Edward to punch me.

Edward and Emmett burst out laughing. "If she really loved him, she wouldn't have cheated on him, you know how Ali is," Edward explained once he calmed down.

"Care to explain what the fuck is so funny?" I knew Edward had a point, but Jesus, she even said she hadn't been with someone in that way since me.

"Only back a couple of weeks and already you guys are going at it like a couple of rabbits." Edward just smiled and shook his head. "I think it's safe to say the spark is still there."

I groaned. "I'm not denying the damn spark. I know it's there. But that still doesn't change things."

"Okay, so we know that you got offered a job here... does Alice? What makes you think she picked him?" Edward asked, getting serious once more.

"No she doesn't, besides it's a temporary thing. I'm leaving as soon as the case is closed."

"Not from what I heard, I heard he was gonna offer you a permanent position." Edward argued.

"I'm just tellin' ya what Charlie and I discussed." Of course Ed would know more, he's family now.

"Yeah, well," Edward shrugged. "Why do you wanna leave so bad? Think about it..."

"Do you really want someone else knockin' boots with _your_ Ali Cat for the rest of who knows how long?" Emmett asked, Edward giving him a furtive look.

"Honestly... I don't know why I wanna leave so bad," I decided to answer Edward and just ignore Emmett's question.

"What do you have in the south? What's keepin' you there? I mean, up here at least you have friends... a family of sorts," Edward shrugged a little, "Us."

"My job..." That's the only thing keeping me there honestly. "I have some where to stay. Jesus, the only reason I have a roof over my head now is cause Bella still had time on her lease." I pointed out.

"We'll figure somethin' out when the time comes Jay, I mean it really ain't that hard to find a place to live."

I sighed. I knew they were right. "Fine, I'll stay. I have some vacation time," I shrugged. "I'll use that until I know what the hell is going on."

"Good," Edward smiled and Emmett nodded in agreement. "So, seriously Jay, what makes you think you lost out to the Armani prick?" Edward asked.

I groaned and pushed myself off the wall to walk outside. "You were there Ed..." I knew they were right behind me.

"I saw the kiss on the dance floor." Edward said to my back.

"Kiss doesn't mean shit, Ed. She's still marrying him." Sparks or not, she wants to spend the rest of her life with him. I spun around to face my two best friends. "How long has this been going? How long have they been engaged? And why of all the self-centered, money hungry pricks in Washington did she have to pick him?"

Edward looked at me wide eyed, "He proposed the day you came back..."

I gaped at him. "So this whole time... This whole time she's been his fiancé and neither one of you thought it was pertinent to tell me?" I turned my attention on Emmett. "You're right, I don't want someone else with _my _Ali Cat, but how do I even know that, that," I said waving my hand in the direction of the building, "is my Ali Cat? My Ali Cat isn't impressed with high priced suits and expensive things. Yet here she is gonna marry the first dick that walks by in Armani! Does he even know what Levis are!" I was so frustrated I wanted to hit my head against the wall, maybe then I make sense of what the fuck was going on.

"I have to break up with Kelly..."

"Dude... she wasn't impressed by his possessions, he charmed her, he worked his ass off to get with her after Rosie and I hosted a Christmas party, apparently he liked what he saw when she was dressed as Mrs. Claus, and yes, you have to break up with Kelly." Emmett said, his usual jovial face was completely somber.

"And just so you know, 'cause I doubt she's told you, he's the first relationship she has had since you." Edward added.

"I kind of figured that one out on my own Ed and for the love of God tell me Rose didn't pick out the Mrs. Claus costume," I groaned imagining Ali Cat in a skimpy costume.

Emmett pursed his lips, "Well... um... Rosie kinda wanted Ali to find a one night stand or something..." he shrugged.

_I'm going to kill my sister._

"It was very short. It's pretty obvious why he wanted her." Edward stated matter of factly.

"Would you guys help me cover up a murder?" I asked only half teasing.

"Depends on who we're killing," Emmett said with a smile.

I laughed and shook my head. "Seriously though, y'all think I can change her mind still?"

Emmett nodded quickly. "She's wanted to marry you since she was six, you really think that's just gonna stop?" Edward asked with a bemused expression on his face.

"But that's before I did some pretty shitty things to her," I pointed out.

Edward shrugged, "From what I hear she only gave in and started dating him 'cause she knew you had some other chick or whatever down in Tennessee. She broke up with him for a week at one point, but I dunno why."

I felt my eyebrows furrow at what he said. "Alright, if I do this... and it doesn't work, then what? You gonna blame me for the rest of our lives?"

Edward seemed to consider it for a moment, "No, if you put good effort into showing Ali you ain't gonna leave and you want her... I won't blame you."

I nodded. "Fair enough. Am I alone on this or can I count on y'all to help me if needed?"

Emmett and Edward smiled, "Count us in."

"Well, as long as you don't do something really stupid like tell her you hate her again." Emmett added with a smile.

**~*~*~November 16th, 2001~*~*~**

I took my usual spot against her locker after the bell rang. For the past month she had been doing everything in her power to ignore me.

I never meant to hurt her when I told her we couldn't be together. Truth be told, I wanted to be with her. The timing just wasn't right.

I was floored when she admitted that she was in love with me. How could she even know that what she felt was love? She was still young.

She pushed me off her locker, not saying a word, just like every other day. I just wanted her to say something, anything really. It wasn't normal for her to be so quiet, so sad.

When she turned to leave her locker I jumped in front of her, blocking her path. She glared at me, everything in her body language telling me to get the fuck out of the way, but she never said it verbally. That's all I wanted.

We continued the dance of me blocking her exit, grabbing the attention of several class mates. I chuckled a little when she blew her hair out of her face in frustration. It was working, she was starting to crack.

"It's too bad your mother is dead Jasper, maybe she could've taught you some manners," she snarled at me.

It was my turn to crack, pressing her tiny body between me and the wall. Her of all people, throwing the death of my mother at me; it enraged me more so than when Felix taunted about it earlier. He's a dick it's expected, but from Alice, it disgusted me that she went that far.

"I would never love an insolent little child like you," I growled in her ear. I pulled away slightly, watching as my words registered within her. Her face dropped as she sealed her eyes shut and turned her head away from me.

She shoved me hard with her book and ran into the ladies room. I just stood there staring at the bathroom, waiting for her to come back.

"Whoa... dude... what did you say to her?" Emmett finally asked from my right.

I turned to see the two very shocked faces of Emmett and Edward staring at me. "I... I'm not sure," I shook my head.

Edward just shook his head, "I gotta go to class." He opened his mouth to say something else, but then closed it with a little shake of his head and walked away.

"I thought you were gonna kiss her for a second there," Emmett laughed, clapping me on the shoulder.

I looked up at him and frowned. "I told her I'd never love her Emmett..." I knew he'd understand what I meant.

His mouth went into a hard line, "Dude..." He looked over his shoulder, "Rosie! Com'ere!"

I pulled my hands through my hair in frustration. "Jesus Em, what have I done?"

"What? I can't be late for class again Em!" Rose said as she jogged over to us. "You look like hell," she said looking me over.

"He just told Ali that he would never love her and now she's in the bathroom." Em stated, giving Rosalie a very serious look.

"Fuck," she growled. "Deal with him would you babe?" She asked giving him a kiss before heading into the direction Alice was.

Emmett shook his head at me, "Way to get her to talk to you again there, sport." Sarcasm, Emmett was good at it.

"I'm sorry but no where in my thoughts while making her paper cranes did I think to myself, 'wonder if Alice is gonna throw the death of my mother at me'," I spat at him, moving to get the hell out of this school. "Had I known she was going to say that I would have avoided her."

"You know she didn't mean that shit, it's Ali baby, she would never do something to hurt you!" Emmett argued, following me.

"Well she fucking did Em!" I glared at some kid that was gaping at us as we made our way out the door. _Really? Six foot two nerd glares and you piss yourself?_

"Look at it from her side, Jazz!" I could hear Emmett pant a little to keep up. "You tell her you don't love her when she admits it to you, while you two were damn near making yourselves into a live porno, then when she tells you to leave her alone you practically stalk her so she'll talk to you, don't you think you're fucking with her head a little? Don't you think that she has the right to lash out a little towards you?"

I turned to face Emmett. "I understand she's pissed Emmett, but that was low... even for her!"

"Honestly man, she thinks nothing she does would hurt you, except that one thing..." Emmett shrugged. "So she used it, because she thinks... no she knows you are playing games with her and it hurts her, so she wants to hurt you back."

"I'm not playing games! I want to be with her, but right now isn't the time. I want her to fucking talk to me because I miss my friend! I miss her laugh, I miss her smile, I miss her..."

Emmett sighed, "I was just giving you her point of view on things okay? I know you miss her, I know you love her... but dude, you have to understand she put herself on the line and you... You rejected her."

_Love? I didn't say anything about love..._

"No, I said we couldn't date. She cut me out."

"Yeah, you can't date but you can feel her up," he nodded his head while raising an eyebrow at me.

"No! Christ, no that's not what I meant." _Okay, I see his point_. "I fucked up man..."

"Continue..." Emmett said with a smile, leading me towards his jeep.

"I fucked up big time?"

Emmett nodded, "What are you gonna do about it?"

"I don't know... Is there anything I can do now? I mean..." I paused to throw my bag into the back of the jeep. "Even if I had a chance, odds are I just killed it."

Emmett climbed into the drivers side, leaning back in his seat as he waited for me to get it. I hopped into the passenger side and raised an eyebrow at him.

"Well?" I asked.

"Ali baby has loved you since she was six years old, I think you may have killed her a little bit, but you didn't kill your chance," Emmett advised.

"I called her an insolent child for fucks sake Em," I admitted.

"Wow. Dude, harsh." Emmett grabbed something out of his glove box and lit one end. "Want some?" he asked with held breath.

I wrinkled my nose and shook my head. "Just hot box Em, you know you want too," I laughed.

"And so I shall," he said blowing smoke out. "Okay, so I suggest, if you can handle it, go today and apologize, then give her a week to cool off."

"You really think she's gonna want to see me again, let alone today, after this?" I asked skeptically.

Emmett shrugged, "What's the worst that could happen?"

"She'd get a restraining order? Or I know, have Edward kick my ass..." I leaned my head back against the head rest.

Em scoffed, "I don't think she'd do either."

It was my turn to scoff. "Yeah... All I know is he wouldn't hesitate to do it. She is his baby sister after all."

"You don't think she's worth a little roughing up?" Em asked, his eyes pink and half-lidded.

"No... she is."

"Then?"

He was right, what did I have to lose?

Later I did as Emmett suggested, going over to the Cullen house with the hope of being able to apologize. But I struck out. Esme told me that Ali wasn't up for company and that she would have her call me when she's feeling better.

I went back to my house and locked myself in my room. I knew I had fucked up royally and I knew that I had to apologize. But how do you apologize when that person doesn't want to see you again?

I was silent at dinner, not that it was anything new for me but even Rose was quiet. I knew she was pissed at me. I hurt her best friend. Hell, I'd be just as angry at her if it were Emmett. The only difference is that she wouldn't be a stupid as I was.

I couldn't sleep that night, thoughts of what Alice and Emmett said filtered through my subconscious and I knew there was no peace to be had. So I did the only think I could think of. I went to Alice.

One thing is for certain, Hollywood lies. There is no easy way to climb up a drain pipe, but I did it.

I carefully opened her window and started to step in when she sat up in bed.

"Ali?" I whispered, mainly so she wouldn't scream.

"Jasper, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean what I said-" she started crying and apologizing to me.

"Shh… Ali, it's okay," I told her as I kneeled beside her. I cupped her face in my hand, gently wiping the tears from her eyes with my thumbs as I tried to think of an apology.

But I never got it out. She pulled herself up, wrapping her arms tightly around my neck as her lips crashed to mine. I knew I should have pulled away. That anything further would just confuse her more, but I couldn't. My hand moved to her hair, fisting it as I sucked her bottom lip into my mouth.

Her hands tangled in my hair, her tongue greedily licked the part of my lips, demanding entrance as my other hand moved to her side, guiding her to lay back. Our tongues danced together, massaging the other, her taste consuming me.

My desire for her began to take control as I pulled her leg higher on my hip so I could grind myself into her, making her moan and grind back. "Oh God," I moaned as continued my movements, moving to kiss along her jaw.

My hand went up her shirt, cupping her breast and making her mew beneath me as I kneaded it, taking the nipple between my fingers to pinch and tease her. I sucked and nipped at her skin as we rolled our hips into each other, both desperate for friction.

The sound of her headboard thumping lightly against the wall broke us out of trance long enough for me to remove my sweatshirt and place it between it and the wall. Once that was done I continued kissing her, loving the taste of her sweet lips as my hand returned to her soft, pert breasts.

My mouth worked its way lower, kissing and sucking on her collarbones as her hands went under my remaining shirt. Her touch sending chills down my spine. She pushed against me, rolling us so she was on top, rubbing her crotch against my hardened cock. My hands traveled down to her ass, squeezing and pulling her harder against me as our lips moved together again.

She moved her lips from mine, kissing along my jaw as she continued to rock against me. I closed my eyes, enjoying the way it felt to have her like this, the way my body responded to hers. I hissed when I felt her lips on my chest. I opened my eyes watching her as she left hot wet kisses every where she could, while moaning at the movements of our hips.

She kissed her way back up my neck stopping below my ear. "Jasper, touch me," she whispered huskily.

I quickly rolled us and pulled myself away. I couldn't do this to her. We shouldn't have been doing this.

She looked at me with wide and confused eyes, her chest heaving as she gasped for air.

"Oh God, Ali…" I panted. "I want to, but we can't. I can't… God, I'm so sorry Ali." I apologized as I backed up towards the window and climbed my way out, shutting it closed behind me.

_I just keep hurting her…_

_

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_End note: Reviews are love :) (nope, no bribes this time ;P)


	18. Chapter 18

**Disclaimer: We are not nor have we ever claimed to be Stephenie Meyer or the owners of The Twilight Saga and its characters. We are merely two girls with an idea and words on a screen.**

**K: Okay, so Robs is on a mini vaycay, so I've been here to hold down the fort by myself… fun. Thanks to everyone for the love and support (I know we sound like a broken record –and for those of you who don't know what that is, think scratched CD).**

**Also a big thank you to our beta Amber. Feel better soon bb! xoxo

* * *

**

**Apov:**

After the dinner party where Garrett announced our engagement he took me to a nice hotel to celebrate our engagement, and to presumably have sex. He kept trying, and being sweet about it, telling me how beautiful I was and how much he loved and desired me, but I couldn't do it, I couldn't get Jasper out of my head.

I think Garrett was getting annoyed with it all because even though he said he had the hotel room till Monday we checked out Sunday afternoon and he left on his business trip a day early. I was confused about everything, I couldn't bring myself to be intimate in that way with Garrett, but I'd let Jasper throw me against the wall and take me like a savage beast any day?

But Jasper was gone, he found out I was getting married, congratulated me and left.

I sighed heavily as I walked into my office. I was torn, I knew Garrett was upset and I was fairly sure he knew why I couldn't be intimate with him. I wanted to make him happy, but the other half of me wanted to say fuck him and jump on the first plane heading to Tennessee to get Jasper back.

But first I had to work on some displays, take some pictures and figure out which underwear would look best for the ad that was going to be printed.

About half-way through my work day a man in a uniform showed up, carrying a vase filled with bright pink tulips and purple orchids, and they were for me. I looked at him, then at the flowers oddly as I signed for them. Garrett only ever sent me roses, so I knew these couldn't possibly be from him.

I saw a small paper crane amongst the flowers attached to a note. I knew who it was from before I even opened the little card; Jasper.

_A little something to make you smile. Call me when you get time. I have a surprise for you._

_~Your Nerdy Boy_

_P.S. I would like the record to show that I am no __longer__ a boy :P  
_

I laughed as I read the part about him no longer being a boy, I had to agree, he was definitely a man. I looked at the phone number scrawled out in his handwriting. I had just a few more things to do and then I could call him.

About twenty minutes later – it's amazing how much work you can get done when properly motivated – I picked up my office phone and dialed his number, it rang a few times before he picked up.

"Whitlock?" he answered, followed by a quiet curse and the sounds of stuff clattering around him.

"Hey," I chirped. "I got the flowers."

"Hey yourself," I could hear the smile in his voice. "Good, I'm glad you liked them. Bella told me where you got her flowers and I thought the lady at the shop was gonna skin me alive when I asked her to make sure they got there... damn it I'm rambling." he laughed softly. "How are you?"

"I'm good, well, confused, but good. How are you? Does that mean you're still in town?"

"I may have had too much caffeine," he admitted sheepishly. "And yes. I'm still in town. I was actually gonna tell you the other night but well... yeah..." he trailed off.

"So... what is this surprise?" I asked. I could hear the impatience in my voice.

"I'm not leaving... Turns out Charlie needs some help, since there's a case that is over lapping jurisdictions and he wanted me to help out. So if you're not busy, I thought perhaps I could take ya to lunch sometime. You know as friends."

My heart began thudding in my chest, he was staying? Forever? He was asking me to lunch? Wait, as friends? "Are you staying forever?" I asked softly.

"As of right now, no." Even he seemed down by this fact. "I've got the okay from my Chief to stay as long as Charlie needs me."

"That's good," I smiled, unsure of what to say. "So... Garrett went on a business trip again, he's gonna be gone for the next eight days..." I didn't know why I was telling him this.

He laughed and I could hear something slam shut. "Is he skipping out on wedding planning?" he teased.

"Probably," I chuckled. "Are you busy? Is this a bad time?"

He laughed. "No not really. Just trying to get some DNA off something for the case. I'm just back-up 'cause apparently Charlie doesn't trust them 'big city kids'."

"Oh." I laughed, "Okay. So you wanna come over for dinner tonight?"

"Sure. Just tell me what time and what to bring and I'll be there."

The smile on my face grew even bigger, "Um, is six okay? And just bring yourself... maybe your camera?"

"My camera?" he asked. "Well now... what kind of dinner you planning there Ali Cat?" he teased again.

I felt myself grow red, "Um... Well I was thinking after dinner maybe you could take some pictures of me? So maybe I'll feel better about the way I look and maybe give them to Garrett?"

He was silent for a minute before clearing his throat. "Yeah, I could help you with that. So six?"

"Yep," I chirped. "See yah then."

"Bye Ali," he said before hanging up.

I was nervous by the time five forty-five rolled around. I had cleaned the house, repeatedly and now was making what used to be his favorite dish; shrimp and pasta Alfredo. I had the garlic bread warming in the oven and the salad fixed and ready to go, I just needed him here.

At exactly six, I heard a knock at the door. _Geez, was he waiting right outside 'til the minute hand hit the twelve or what?_ I thought as I pulled open the door. Jasper looked nice in his jeans, button down blue shirt, chucks and glasses. _I missed seeing him in his glasses._

"Come on in," I stepped back and gestured for him to cross the threshold.

He stepped through, giving me a kiss on the cheek. "Something smells good..."

"I made Shrimp Alfredo for you," I said with a smile as I closed and locked the door.

"No way, I haven't had it since," he stopped talking and shook his head. "Thank you, but you didn't have to go out of your way Ali."

I tilted my head at him, how long had it been since he'd had it? "It wasn't a problem; I always have shrimp on hand."

"Good to know," he smiled as he set his camera bag down. My eyes focused briefly on the bag before I looked back up at him and smiled. If anyone could take beautiful pictures of me it would be Nerdy Boy.

After dinner and wine, we went into my office that was more like a walk-in-closet. Actually it was a second bedroom I converted so it could house all my shoes, accessories, plus the various samples I get from work, and of course, my computer.

I dressed in a sexy little number I had recently bought; it was crocheted black lace with pretty blue trim. The bottoms were more of a skirt that showed the very bottom of your butt-cheeks. The blue garters held up my black lace stockings and I put on a pair of sexy black pumps to finish off the look. After mussing my hair, I walked out of the connecting bathroom, feeling a little nervous.

_What would Garrett think of me like this?_

_What would Jasper think?_

I looked over at him and he was ogling me with a mixture of shock and pleasure all over his face. I knew I looked way different than when we were younger, I had filled out more, that was for sure. After giving him a nervous smile I walked over to my powder blue settee and casually sat down.

"So... how would you like me to pose?" I asked.

He licked his bottom lip as he thought it over. "Just relax like you would naturally."

I leaned over to the side and propped myself up on my elbow and bringing one foot up on the seat. "How's this?" I asked. It was as natural as I could get.

"Perfect," he said as he started to snap some pictures.

I leaned my head back, watching him as he took pictures of me. I was beginning to feel the effects of the wine. "Should I move?" I asked.

He pulled the camera down and looked at me. "Yeah... try leaning back..." He tilted his head as if picturing me in that position. I leaned back on the seat, my legs spreading a little. He continued taking the pictures and I could see him bite his lip as he concentrated.

"Hey Ali?" he asked from behind the camera.

"Yeah?" I responded. Adjusting my position so that I was kneeling.

"How erotic do you want these?" he asked.

I shrugged, "I dunno...why?"

He moved the camera down and shrugged. "Not sure. I was just thinking when you were laying back earlier... The way you had your legs spread slightly, if you were to place your hand on your stomach it would imply that you were thinking of the recipient." He gave me a small smile. "I sure as hell would want to see if you were taking care of things in the next picture..."

I lay back on the settee again, putting one hand on my lower abdomen and the other on my breast, just for good measure. "Like this?" I asked.

He nodded. "Perfect."

I bit my lip and watched him take a few more pictures, sliding the hand that was resting on my abdomen lower and lower. I don't know if it was the wine or the fact I found it hot that Nerdy Boy was once again taking pictures of me, but when my fingers found my clit I arched my back and moaned. _Damn, I shoulda worn panties under this thing._

"Beautiful..." he said softly from behind the camera.

I gave him a lusty look before reaching up with my other hand and untying the top. I moved so that I was looking towards the back of the settee and pulled it off, tossing it at him before pushing my hips back slightly so he got a good look at the fact that the skirt didn't have anything under it.

"Tease," he responded huskily.

I slid my hand back down between my thighs and stroked my wetness. "I never tease."

"Uh huh..." he paused. "And does that feel good Ali?"

"Yes," I didn't mean for it to come out as a purr.

"How good?" he asked.

"Really good," I moaned as I slipped a finger inside of myself.

I heard Jasper groan. "Baby... please..." he said in a pained whisper.

_Please what?_ I could feel my heart pounding in my chest. "Do you want me Nerdy Boy?" My voice was so husky and wanton I barely recognized it.

"I do..." he responded, his voice heavy with desire.

I felt the smallest pang of guilt,_ only this once_, I promised. "Fuck me Nerdy Boy..."

I heard the soft thud of the camera being set on the desk. "Lay back Ali," he instructed softly. I turned around and leaned back on the settee, resting one foot on the floor and the other on the cushion. He smirked at me as he made himself comfortable by my feet. "I want to taste you," he explained.

I bit my lip, "Then taste me."

He licked his lip as he grabbed my thighs, pulling me closer to him. His eyes held mine as his tongue darted out and slowly licked me. "Oh!" I moaned, _dear lord that felt good!_ I clutched the sides of the settee for dear life. He continued lapping at me, making that spot in my stomach coil and my pussy throb, he was teasing me with his tongue and it was driving me crazy.

He thrust his tongue inside me, curling and twisting it as his thumb rubbed circles into my clit. _Oh shit_, my eyes rolled back as I arched up off the cushion. "Fuck..." I muttered. He switched his tongue and finger, pumping into me slowly as his tongue licked me quickly. I reached my hand down and tugged on his hair, forcing him to look up at me. "Do you want to fuck?"

He nodded in response. "Drop your pants," I ordered. His eyebrow quirked up and a smile started to spread across his face, but he did as he was told. I reached up and grabbed hold of him; he was hard, thick and ready to go. Very ready to go. He kneeled down between my legs and I positioned him, anxious to have him inside of me.

"Uh... baby?" he asked suddenly.

"Yeah?" _Crap. It's never good when he interrupts right at this moment_.

"Condom?"

_Fuck!_ "Um..." I chewed my lip. I was on birth control, but it would be good to have protection. "Oh! My desk drawer! It's probably expired, but better than nothing right?"

"Uh... I don't know..." he got up and went to the desk. "Which drawer Ali Cat?"

"The right side, top drawer, in a little blue box." I blushed, it was a small memento box that Jasper never knew I had.

He opened the drawer and rooted around for a moment before pulling out the box. He pulled the condom out and looked at the back. "Uh... yeah that's not happening," he flipped it back over and I saw his brow furrow together.

"What?" I asked, suddenly feeling very disappointed.

"Expired in oh-seven..." he responded still looking at the package. "Where'd you get this?"

I sat up a little, "From you, remember?"

*~*~* April 19th, 2002 *~*~*

I watched as my brothers left with their respective prom dates; Emmett with Rosalie and Edward with Sara. I was happy that they were going to have fun, but I was also happy because Nerdy Boy was staying here, with me, rather than going to prom with Cordilla.

Cordilla, she had started to show interest in Jasper a couple of months ago, and honestly I was fairly sure Jasper noticed she was beautiful with _nice_ tits and long shapely legs and a _nice_ ass with a thin waist. Everytime I thought about her I wanted to gag, I couldn't compete with that. I had small boobs, no ass and knobby knees. I mean... I could see why Jasper would like her, or at least like looking at her.

Cordilla asked him to prom and he, to everyone's shock and amazement, turned her down, insisting that he had other plans. His other plans seemed to involve me and movies and I was completely okay with this.

I set up the basement with pillows, blankets, popcorn, junk food and soda. The parents trusted us, or rather, trusted him, not to do anything and they left as well, going to some function or other at the hospital. I plopped myself down on the couch in the basement as he put the first movie in; Scream, it's a classic.

Once the movie was in the player and started up, he climbed onto the couch with me and put his head in my lap. Not gonna lie, I never have good or pure thoughts when he does this, especially after the concert we went to with the tickets I got for my birthday, but he seemed to like it when I ran my fingers through his hair.

After a few minutes of watching Sidney and the gang thwart a killer I finally spoke, "Are you sad you aren't going to prom N.B.?"

"Nope, I'd rather hang out with you," he turned so I could see the genuine smile on his face.

I could feel my ears get hot, "Really? Why?"

"Because you don't expect me to be this perfect guy. You don't judge and you actually listen when I'm talking to you." He shrugged and looked back at the screen. "Who needs all the over-priced bullshit of prom, when you can just stay at home with the person you care most about?"

My heart thudded loudly in my chest. "You care about me?"

"Of course I do Alice." He rolled over onto his back and looked up at me. "Why would you think I didn't?"

I looked away from him for a moment, "The stuff that happened last winter..." I said quietly.

"No... Even that couldn't make me stop caring about you Ali Cat."

"Would you have gone to prom if I wanted to go?"

"Yeah, of course," he smiled at me.

"Hey... Have you ever had sex before?" I asked, slightly curious.

He blushed and looked at the TV. "No," he said softly.

"Why not? I mean, I am fairly sure you could... with Cordilla or something." I tried my hardest to push away the jealousy I felt when I said that.

He shrugged. "I don't find her all that attractive. I mean, sure she's pretty until she opens her mouth to speak," he chuckled. "Why are you so interested in my sex life all of a sudden?"

I shrugged, my ears getting red all over again, "The stuff you whispered in my ear during the concert." I got all hot just from the memory.

He moved again to look at me. "What about it?"

"It was really...sexual." _Not to mention hot_.

"And it surprises you that I said it?" he asked.

"Yeah, actually it does... I mean..." I stopped myself from rambling.

He reached up and brushed his hand along my cheek. "Tell me what you're thinking Ali Cat."

"You said you dreamed of... doin' me." I chewed my lip, "It's just strange to hear from you, after everything that happened, you know?"

"Yeah, but it doesn't mean it's not true."

"So you're attracted to me, but we can't be together... just friends right?"

"Yeah... hold on..." he got up and reached into his back pocket, "I know you're not supposed to keep these in your pocket but..." he shrugged and handed me a condom, "I'll tell you what. That right there is a promise. If by the time your prom rolls around and you still want me and I still want you. That's our free pass. Lame I know," he laughed and gave me a small smile.

I bit back a grin, "You'd take my virginity?"

"If you haven't moved on to more appealing boys by then," he said as he sat back down, then laughed. "Who knows, at this rate, you might be taking mine," he teased, bumping me lightly with his shoulder.

I rolled my eyes, "You have no idea how hot you are do you?"

He scoffed. "Yeah cause Sci-fi nerds are the next Johnny Depp."

I straddled him and removed his glasses, setting them carefully on the side table. "You have gorgeous hair," I made a point of dragging my nails across his scalp. He seemed to enjoy that. "Amazing eyes, a nice nose, a nicer smile, really kissable lips," I moved my hands down and up under his shirt, feeling the slight muscles he had under there. "And you are starting to get a pretty killer body."

He bit his lip and smiled. "Just keep stroking my ego there Ali," he teased with a wink.

"Is that what we're callin' it?" I asked, wiggling in his lap.

He laughed and put his hands on my hips to get me to stop moving. "I suppose, yes."

"But I'm fairly sure you're gonna lose it before then... and probably forget all about lil' ol' me... so yeah." I gave him my best smile.

"Hey come on, it's my prom night. We're supposed to be having fun."

"What do you wanna do then?"

He shrugged. "Not talk about things that make you sad."

"It doesn't make me sad," I lied.

He sighed. "You mouth and lips might say you're not, but I can see it in your eyes Ali. I don't need my glasses to see when the spark you usually have isn't there." I leaned forward and kissed him gently, _just a peck wouldn't hurt. Right?_

"What was that for?" he asked with a smile.

"Cause of how much you pay attention," I swallowed hard. "Whoever winds up with you is a lucky lady."

He cupped my cheek in his hand. "Nah, whoever gets you is lucky," he said with a smile before pressing his lips to mine.

I pulled away and wrapped my arms around his neck, "I really hope it's you."

He smiled and pulled me closer, wrapping his arms tightly around me. "I hope so too," he whispered. I felt my heart flutter in my chest as I clutched the condom in my hand.

~*~oOo~*~

I smiled as he realized what I was talking about. "Do you remember now?" I asked.

"You kept this?" he asked with an amused expression on his face.

"It was your promise to me," I said with a laugh, shaking my head at my own stupidity.

He nodded. "It was, too bad you didn't have this with you the day we..." he rubbed the back of his neck and gave me his old shy smile.

"The day we... what?" I asked, not hiding my confusion.

"In the dorm... scientific research?" He raised his eyebrow at me.

"Oh!" I giggled. "Well, we had a condom, it was okay."

"True... it makes me wonder what else you've kept without me knowing," he teased with a mischievous smile. My eyes went wide, I had no idea what was in that box anymore. He sat down in my office chair and smirked. "Let's see..." he said, slowly opening the lid to the blue box.

He looked in and started chuckling. "Why is there a broken pair of glasses in here?"

"Those are the ones I accidentally stepped on that one time," I blushed.

He smiled and shook his head. He picked up the piece of heart shaped seaglass and held it up for me to see. "You had your own box of memories, huh?"

I smiled a little and nodded, "Yeah... I started it before we did stuff, you know?"

He nodded. "Oh Jesus..." He held up the lock of hair. "Please tell me this is not from that hair cut," he laughed.

I snickered, remembering how my mom had to give him a crew cut after that. "Yeah... it is."

He shook his head. "I still think you did that intentionally."

I pouted at him, "Why would I do it intentionally huh?"

"'Cause you were jealous of my beautiful wavy locks," he teased, even pretending to push his hair off his shoulders. I laughed and shook my head. "You seemed to enjoy touching it as it grew back," he said as he put the things back in the box.

"How about you just put the box back?" I asked, giving him a pout.

He lifted his eyebrow at me. "Or you'll do what there, Ms. Cullen?"

"Finger myself... and not let you help me out." Okay, that was actually a pretty lame punishment, but it used to work back in the day.

"Tease," he shot back, closing the lid of the box.

"I think I have some condoms in my nightstand... wanna go to my bedroom?" I asked, feeling rather stupid.

He looked over at me as he decided something. "Come here."

I walked over to him, "Yes, sir?" I smirked a little.

He pulled my hand making me sit in his lap. "I wanna tell you something... in case things go in the direction they were headed."

I smiled a little at him, "Yes?"

"I'm here for you. In whatever capacity you need me. I just don't want to hurt you anymore," he said looking into my eyes.

I could see it, the way he felt, and I felt guilty because I knew the Garrett thing was hurting him, but I didn't quite trust Jasper not to run away again, not to freak out about his feelings. I leaned my forehead against his shoulder. "Thank you," I whispered.

I felt him press his lips into my hair. "Always Ali Cat," he murmured.

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**Endnote: Leave a review, if only to let K know she did this right lol :P**


	19. Chapter 19

**Disclaimer: We are not nor have we ever claimed to be Stephenie Meyer or the owners of The Twilight Saga and its characters. We are merely two girls with an idea and words on a screen.**

**Robs: Robs is not here right now, please leave a message after the beep... *beep***

**K: Yep, she's still on vaycay, but having fun so it's all good :) I'm here to give you another update! Enjoy!**

**Massive love and thanks to our beta Amber. We love you bb!

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**JPOV**

We wound up spending the night in each other's arms. I slept better than I normally do, but not as good as I usually could with Alice. I guess I had too much on my mind.

I was a little perplexed about why she wanted to have sex earlier. I knew she was horny, and let's face it, I wanted nothing more than to fuck her senseless, but she was going to be married to another man. _Had I broken her so much so that she was afraid to commit to him?_

I had no room to talk though. I was barely able to sustain a relationship with any of the girls I had dated, to no one's fault but my own. I just couldn't get everything I left behind out of my head and I compared everyone and everything to Alice.

As much as I wanted to bring Alice pleasure last night, I was thankful that we didn't do anything. I knew it would just hurt her more in the end and honestly, I didn't want her to think it was the only reason I came over.

I needed to show her that I'm here for her. That, despite my actions in the past, I'm not going to leave her. And fucking her every chance I got sure as hell wouldn't help the situation any.

I looked over at her sleeping figure only to see her looking at me. "Jesus," I laughed. "Trying to scare me?"

"No," she chuckled, "you just looked lost in thought... what are you thinking about?"

"Nothing much." I shrugged. "You know how I get... my mind was just wandering." I smiled at her and pulled her closer. "Did I wake you?"

"No," She shook her head. "It's nice to wake up with someone again."

I nodded and glanced at the bedside clock. "What time do you need to start getting ready for work?"

"I usually get up at seven."

I shook my head and kissed her forehead. "Go back to sleep Ali Cat, you've still got two hours."

"I wanna hang with you," she said with a smile.

"Well I'm not going anywhere. I promise, I'll be here when you wake up." I moved onto my side to face her.

She yawned and giggled. "Okay," she said, before closing her eyes.

I smiled and watched her as she fell back to sleep. The fluttering under her eyes lids and slight parting of her lips told me she was fast asleep. I gently kissed her before attempting to go back to sleep myself.

~*~oOo~*~

I closed the centrifuge lid, waiting for the click and the whirring sound before taking my glasses off to rub my eyes. One draw-back to not sleeping is burning out really fast, especially when you're straining your eyes on computer screens, light tables and microscopes.

"Hey Whitlock, do you have the samples for the Murphy case?" I put my glasses back on to see one of the detectives standing in the doorway of the lab.

"Murphy? Oh yeah!" I rolled my chair over and pulled out the file. "Three samples were found. The victim's, one that shares common traits, and an unknown," I informed him as I handed over the file.

"Thanks," he said gruffly as he left the lab.

"Dickhead," I muttered under my breath. Most of the staff didn't like me being here and I felt like I was in the middle of a damn turf war at times, but that's what happens when you get called in from another jurisdiction.

"Didn't you have somewhere to be at four?" I looked up again to see Grant looking at me.

This was technically his lab and while I was doing work for Charlie I also helped Grant out.

"Yeah, why?" I asked.

He laughed and shook his head. "Man… it's a quarter after five."

_Shit!_ "Fuck Ali is gonna kill me," I groaned trying to clean up as quickly as I could.

Grant laughed and shook his head. "Ali huh? Got yourself a girlfriend and didn't tell me?" He teased as he pulled the samples I started out of the centrifuge.

I scoffed. "I wish. I just promised her I'd meet with her and the caterer at four."

"Caterer? You getting married?" he asked.

I shook my head as I stood up. "No, she is. I'm just helping her out."

"Ah... you're in the 'friends zone'. Good luck with that."

I just rolled my eyes and said my goodbyes before hurrying to get my coat and helmet.

I hit the number for Bella's cell and waited for her to pick up.

She giggled as she answered. "Still haven't learned to read a watch I see," she teased.

"Ha ha Bells. Is Ali Cat still there?"

"Yeah, we're just talking and she's had some wine..." she trailed off.

"Please tell her I'm sorry and I'm on my way right now."

I could hear Bella pull the phone away and say something to Alice. "Alright, I told her. Just drive safe."

"Are you guys at your office or the house?" I asked to make sure.

"The office," Bella said, giving me the directions before hanging up the phone.

When I arrived at the address Bella gave me, I looked at it skeptically. I knew she had a private catering business, and after she did some gig for a movie shoot she'd made enough to buy a place that was all kitchen and office. This building looked more like a warehouse.

I walked into the building and could hear the girls talking and the smells of whatever Bella was cooking filled the air, making me realize I hadn't eaten yet today.

I approached Ali Cat from behind, kissing her on the cheek. "Sorry I'm late beautiful," I whispered before sitting down next to her.

She smiled, blushed and took a long sip from her drink. "It's okay."

Bella smiled at us, a knowing look in her eyes before she left us to stir something.

"No, I told you I was going to be here. I just lost track of time. So what did I miss?"

"Nothin' really, we just talked about the cake."

"Since when could Bells bake?" I teased, earning a resounding 'hey' from her.

Alice laughed, "Bells ain't makin' it, her partner Jake is."

"Oh good," I laughed as Bella sat back down. "I'm pretty sure you want your guests to be able to eat the cake."

"Ohmygod! I make brownies wrong one time," Bella said, shaking her head at me as she slid a Mountain Dew towards me.

"They were bricks and Emmett was so pissed that you used his 'special butter' for them," I snorted.

"They were groovy," Alice winked at Bella.

Bella laughed and shook her head. "What the hell was he thinking putting 'weed butter' in the fridge? Our dad is a cop for fucks sake!"

"Oh I don't know... We are all guilty of thinking we could get away with things when were younger." I laughed.

"Like the 'tutoring'," Alice used finger quotes, "sessions, alone in your dorm room, all weekend?"

I raised my eyebrow at her. "Or someone purposely failing their classes so they would need it."

**~*~*~October 18th, 2002~*~*~**

I had just finished organizing my desk so that two people could work at it, when there was a soft knock at the door. "Come in," I called out knowing who it was.

Last weekend Esme had asked for me to help Ali Cat out. Apparently she was failing her history and science classes and Esme thought I would be the best candidate to tutor her. The plan was for Esme to pay me twenty dollars a week until Alice's grades went back up.

I tried to tell her that there was no charge for it, after all I'd do anything to help Ali Cat, but Esme wouldn't hear of it.

I heard the door click shut and I looked over to see Alice with her overnight bag and book bag. I smiled at her. "Well, make yourself at home silly."

She smiled shyly and put the bags over by Edward's bed. "So, mom said you're gonna tutor me?"

I nodded. "That's the plan. So tell me something, do you find history and science boring or are you too busy drooling over some guy?" I teased.

She gaped at me for a minute, "I might find it a bit boring."

I laughed at her expression. "You can tell me if there's someone that's got your eye Ali," I shook my head. "Do you want something to drink?"

"Yes please," She smiled at me and sat on my bed.

I went over to the fridge that Ed and I had in our dorm room and grabbed two bottles of water. "So, I was thinking… we could get some pizza or Chinese then tackle whichever one you want to tonight," I suggested as I handed her a bottle.

"Okay... um can we get Chinese? It's something Ed hates, so I don't get it too often you know?"

I nodded. "Of course."

"I've missed you," she chirped as I grabbed my phone.

"I missed you too," I admitted. College life was definitely hectic and made it damn near impossible to spend time with anyone but my books.

"So... you... uh... have a girlfriend or whatever?"

I laughed and shook my head. "Nope. Nerds, contrary to someone's personal opinion, are not considered hot," I teased as I dialed the number for the Chinese takeout place.

"Not all nerds are hot, just you," she countered.

I smiled and shook my head at her as I ordered our food. "Apparently you're the only one who thinks so," I told her after I hung up the phone.

"Why do you say that?" she asked, tilting her head to study me.

"Nothing," I told her with a small smile while sitting on my bed. "So... how's high school life?"

"Boring," she sighed. "I got asked to homecoming by this guy named Chuck."

"Oh..." I looked down at my phone trying to seem like I wasn't that interested. "You gonna go with him?"

"I dunno, he's not really my type..." She looked at me expectantly.

"Oh well, if he's not your type then there's nothing to worry about huh? I mean not that I was worried, I just mean... Shit, so you want to work on history or science tonight?" _Yeah that was smooth._

She gave a small laugh, "I guess science."

Shortly after we started working on her physics homework the food arrived, giving us what she called a 'study break'.

We got situated on the floor where we ate while we watched TV. It was nice just having her here to hang out with, even if we were supposed to be studying. I missed being able to hang out with her every day.

But it also made me acutely aware of her. Periodically my eyes would wander along her toned legs, watch her pert breasts bounce as she laughed at the show. Even the faint smell of her shampoo seemed to call to me, more so than usual.

I wanted to be respectful of her and her personal space, even if other parts of my anatomy wanted me to pin her down and hump her senseless. And it's not like our friendship was strictly platonic. It was anything but platonic. Or at least it had been.

Since I moved into the dorm, I hardly had time to go back to Forks anymore. Sure I had a standing invitation to the Cullen's family dinners on Sunday with Edward, but I was working my ass off to keep my scholarship. _And the lack of seeing Alice made me wonder if she even had any interest in me still. _

"Hey Ali..." I started, poking my dumpling with a chopstick. "Besides this Chuck guy not being your type... is there another reason why you don't want to go to homecoming with him?"

She blushed a little, "Isn't it obvious?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. I mean people change, feelings change, right?"

"Sure," she said sounding doubtful, her eyes cast down on her food.

I sighed. "I always hurt you, you know? I don't mean to, but I can feel it."

"You don't," she argued, staring at me wide eyed.

"Ali Cat..." I gave her a sad smile. "You don't have to admit it, just know that I don't mean to hurt you. I just never know the right things to say sometimes."

"I know..." She smiled.

I leaned closer to her. "So you still like me? Even though I'm a huge nerd and can't stop staring at your legs in those shorts?" I felt my ears warm up, the tell tale sign that I was blushing for admitting that to her, but I wanted a genuine smile from her.

She squeezed her thighs together and smiled, "Yes, so much that I failed my classes 'cause I knew they'd ask you to tutor me."

I laughed at that. "Why you little faker... I knew something was up because you were excited about being in AP Physics and then your mom tells me your failing." I rolled my eyes at her. "And to think, I _was _going to kiss you," I teased.

Her head snapped up, "You aren't now?"

I shook my head, "Nope, 'cause you've been bad."

"Come on Nerdy Boy..." She pouted.

I sighed, "I don't know Ali Cat..." I bit my cheek to keep from smiling.

"I'll be really good," She bit back a grin.

I quirked my eyebrow up at her. "How good?"

"As good as you want me to be?"

I laughed and put the white take out box next to me before pulling her into my lap. "But what if I want you to be bad?"

"How bad do you want me, Mr. Whitlock?" She damn-near purred.

I cupped her face with my hands. "We'll see," I said with a smirk before pressing my lips to hers.

~*~oOo~*~

The soft clink of porcelain and the smell of chicken brought me out of my memory. "Chicken Cordon Bleu," Bella said with a wink at me.

I smiled back at her and listened as she explained to Ali Cat that the idea behind it was to be the guilty pleasure dish, since it was more than chicken.

Alice looked at me and smiled. I wondered what that look was for but decided not to ask.

After Ali's meeting with Bella, I took the very tipsy bride-to-be back to her house. She was giggling about something the whole ride back and again I decided not to ask and ruin her fun.

"You know, you're a cute drunk," I teased as I set her on the couch and started to pull her shoes off for her.

"You think so?" she asked, still giggling.

"I do," I told her, placing the shoes by the couch before sitting next to her. "What's so funny buddy?" I finally asked in reference to her giggling.

"You looked funny driving my car, I think you're too big for it." She set off on another round of giggles.

I just shook my head and smiled. "Do you want me to start a bath for you or will you just worry about in the morning?"

"You can start a bath for me," She winked at me.

I nodded, pretending I didn't notice her flirting. "Tylenol in the medicine cabinet?"

"Yes," She leaned close to me.

"Baby, you're drunk," I warned her. I didn't want her to do something she'd regret later.

"I want you..." She tilted her head and wrapped her arms loosely around my neck.

I brushed the hair off the side of her face and smiled tenderly at her. "I want you too Ali Cat, but you know we shouldn't."

She pouted, "I know."

I kissed her softly on the forehead. "Come on, let me get you a nice hot bath ready with some pain pills and you'll be fine in the morning."

"Okay..." she agreed, letting me pick her up.

~*~oOO~*~

Over the next few days, I spent more time sleeping in Alice's bed, with her, than I ever dreamed possible.

Besides trying to be respectful of her relationship with _him_, it was difficult to keep my hands to myself. Add in the fact that the case I was here for was near a close, my mind was constantly overwhelmed with thoughts.

I was almost done with the case Charlie wanted me to help out with and while I told Alice I wasn't leaving, I knew Chief Star, back in Knoxville, was expecting me back.

I was stuck. Do I finish up what I had to do here and leave Alice or do I quit my job and stay?

Alice would be pissed if I quit to stay here... but yet it would hurt her if I left.

_I'm screwed_.

I was just getting ready to head out the door when Paul, the department chief called me into his office.

Paul was a middle aged divorcé, balding with red hair and quite honestly, reminded me somewhat of a leprechaun. Though he was a pretty nice guy and seemed to genuinely care for his staff.

I sat down across from him and wondered what this impromptu meeting was all about.

"First let me say thank you. You've done an excellent job helping out Chief Swan as well as my department," he said in his thick New York accent. _Brooklyn, I think._

"No problem at all, sir. I'm just grateful that y'all let me take up some space in your lab."

He smiled and nodded tossing a stack of paper work at me. "It turns out we need another tech on graves, and your Department Chief had nothing but high praises, emphasizing your skills in technical analyzing." I nodded my head, silently letting him know he could continue.

"We don't have anyone on our team with your knowledge and after speaking with Chief Star, both Chief Swan and I were hoping to convince her of possibly letting you stay here permanently, if you choose to do so."

"Are you offering me a job?" I asked after a few moments of silence.

Paul laughed. "Yes sir, I believe I am."

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End note: Well… Well… Wonder if he takes the offer… What do y'all think?


	20. Chapter 20

**Disclaimer: We are not nor have we ever claimed to be Stephenie Meyer or the owners of The Twilight Saga and its characters. We are merely two girls with an idea and words on a screen.**

**Also: Our beta Amberstar63, does not approve of playing with your food. But when do we ever listen to her? *giggles***

**K: *happy dance* Robs is back! Robs is back! Oh shit, that means I have to get to work *headdesk* lol j.k…. kind of. :/**

**Robs: YAY! I'm back! thanks everyone for their well wishes while I was away and thanks for keeping miss K company!**

**Thank you to Ms. Amber (even if we didn't listen to her *evil laugh*)

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**APOV:**

I was torn, very torn. Garrett was in Tokyo, playing the good fiancé, calling me every night to check in with me while I was trying to seduce my ex into staying.

There really is a spot in hell with my name on it.

I sighed as I put my groceries away, it had been a relatively easy day at work so I had gotten to go home early, but going home early also meant I had more time to think, and time to think for me right now was probably a bad thing.

Jasper, my Nerdy Boy – who grew into a really hot Forensic Investigator – was coming over for dinner tonight. Again. It was becoming a nightly occurrence. He'd come over and kiss me on the cheek, we'd eat and drink wine and then I'd make an ass of myself by trying to get him to sleep with me, only to have him actually sleep with me, in my bed, without doing anything.

Tonight I was making him steak. He used to really like them, hopefully he still did. I heard a knock at the door just as I putting the potatoes in the oven and rushed to answer it. It was Jasper who had a big smile and held a nice bottle of red wine.

"Hey NB." I grinned at him and received my peck on the cheek.

"Hi Ali Cat. How was work?" he asked as he followed me in.

"Slow, how was yours?"

"Surprising actually."

"Really? What happened?" I asked as I followed him through to the dining room.

"I got a job offer," He shrugged as if it was nothing.

I was confused, "A job offer?"

He nodded. "Apparently they need a certain kind of tech on graveyards and I happen to be a jack of all trades."

"Really?" I couldn't hide my excitement. "Are you gonna take it?"

He finally smiled and nodded his head. "Yes, I took it. I mean, the only reason why I was staying in Tennessee was because of my career and now, I don't have that excuse anymore."

"What about Kelly though?"

"I'm gonna end it with her. I'm not in love with her, or even happy..." he shrugged, "what's the point?"

"That's true," I nodded, if he breaks up with her... _wait Alice, don't go down that road. That road leads to nothing but hurt._ But he's not leaving this time! I argued with myself. "Um. I made you steak," I smiled, changing the subject.

"Yum," He smiled back. "Do you need help with anything?"

"No," I shook my head and smiled. I could always count on him to offer.

"Will you at least let me do the dishes this time?" he teased. "I feel like, I'm being ungrateful."

"Sure, you can do the dishes," I agreed, walking back into the kitchen to think about the things he had told me. Jasper was going to stay here, well, not _here_, here, but back in Washington. _Holy crap._

***~*~* February 5th, 2005 *~*~***

I was packing my stuff, getting ready for another weekend with the love of my life. _Oh Nerdy Boy... how I adore thee._ I found myself smiling like an idiot as I perfected my makeup in the mirror. I heard the sound of a knock downstairs and was rather perplexed by it, my parents were out of town and the guys were at the apartment.

I ran downstairs and opened the door, expecting a salesperson, but that wasn't who it was.

"Hey... I was just getting ready to go over and see you." I told my Nerdy Boy, he looked sad about something.

"I came to say good bye Ali Cat," He looked down at his shoes. "I didn't want you to get there and expect to see me."

I looked at him confused, he's saying goodbye? "Where are you goin'?"

He shrugged. "Texas I think. I just need to get out of here."

"Can I go with you?" I asked, I didn't want to be left behind, I just wanted to be with him.

"Ali Cat... I'm not coming back," He looked up at me. "You've got Ed and your parents. I can't ask you to leave them behind."

"So you're just gonna leave me? After everything?" My voice cracked.

He sighed. "I don't want to Ali..."

"Then take me with you, I love you, I don't wanna live without you, they'll all understand I'm sure of it!" I pleaded, my eyes filling with tears.

"Baby don't cry," He pulled me to him, holding me close. "You really want to do this?"

"I just wanna be with you." I told him, looking up at him as I fisted his shirt in my hands.

He nodded. "Alright... but you have to listen to me okay? If I say no about something _please_ don't fight it."

I sighed heavily, "Okay. Can I go get my stuff?"

He smiled slightly. "Yeah grab what you need."

"Okay," I jumped up and kissed him before running quickly back up the stairs. Grabbing my bags that I had already packed, plus a few extra items before writing a note to my parents explaining everything to them and running back down the stairs.

Nerdy Boy wasn't there. I tried to not think too much about it as I ran out the front door, breathing a sigh of relief when I saw him opening the hatch of the _Santa Fe_ he drove. I turned around, shut and locked the front door before I walked over to him, all my luggage in hand.

"I was scared you left me," I admitted.

"Nah, just making room," He smiled taking my bags from me. "Don't you want your pillow? I think we might do some camping in the back of this thing... to save money."

"Oh yeah..." I turned and ran back into the house, taking the steps two at a time before I grabbed my pillow, my dance shoes and all the money from my piggy bank. I ran back downstairs and grabbed a loaf of bread and some other goodies before going out the front door again, making sure to lock up after myself. "How's this?" I asked, showing him the stuff I had piled into plastic grocery bags.

He laughed and shook his head. "Good thinking Ali Cat." He took the bag with food and put it next to a cooler. "If you want you can keep your pillow up front. Might need it along the way," He shrugged.

"Okay," I smiled happily and skipped over to the passenger side of the car, pushing my pillow into the seat next to me and buckling up as I waited for him to get into the car. "Where to first Nerdy Boy?"

He shook his head as he buckled in. "I don't know honestly..." He looked at me and smiled. "Where do you want to go?"

"Um... Yellowstone!" I giggled like mad and he smiled sweetly at me.

"Maps are in the glove box, captain." I saluted him and found the U.S. road-map, and happily began trying to pick out the best route. Nerdy Boy wasn't leaving without me, he was taking me with him, he wanted me with him. My heart soared.

~*~oOO~*~

That first night we stayed in a hotel, we ate McDonalds, played games, watched a movie, and fucked. It was amazing. I loved falling asleep with him, waking up with him and knowing it was just us and nothing else mattered.

The next day we made it to the eastern state line, and decided to camp, it seemed like fun. I watched from the small campfire Jasper made as he moved things to the front of the SUV and made a bed for us in the back. "What do you wanna eat tonight?" I asked, tilting my head a little as I watched his ass wiggle around in the back of the car.

"What do we got?" he asked looking over his shoulder at me.

"Um," I looked down from his ass to the cooler and bag of food at my feet. "We have stuff for soup... and chicken...we should make the chicken before it goes bad." I advised.

"Sounds good..." he backed up, put his hands on his hips looking inside the car. "This should be interesting..."

"What should?" I asked, grabbing the pan and putting the chicken inside before topping it with some BBQ sauce.

He closed the hatch before coming over towards me. "Sleeping in the car, I might need you to bust my knee caps," he joked.

"No way," I shook my head with a smile, "maybe you should just spoon me."

"Oh trust me baby, I was planning on it," He smiled at me as he sat down. "What kind of chicken are you making?"

"Barbeque... or tryin' anyway... it's not quite the same without a grill, but I think it'll be good." I smiled at him. "Should we have some veggies to go with it?"

He nodded, "Might as well right?"

"Yeah... so what we havin'?" I asked, wiggling in my seat and pulling the coat around me more.

He looked in the bags, "We got corn and potatoes..."

"Corn!" I said happily.

He laughed and pulled the ears of corn out. "Here, get the stuff off that one, I'll get the foil ready."

I smiled at him and did as I was told, stroking the cob when I was done and making him laugh at me. "I got your cob ready, sir," I said with a wink.

He chuckled and wrapped it in the foil. "Didn't your mother tell you not to play with your food?" He teased as he got the other ear wrapped and placed them both in a different pot on the fire.

"Yeah, but then I play and gobble up your cock all the time so it must've confused me," I responded in the most innocent voice I could manage.

He laughed and shook his head. "You cold?" he asked, noticing my jacket.

"A little," I admitted. It _was_ the beginning of February after all.

"Come here," he held his arms open for me and I happily crawled into his lap.

"Hey Jazz?"

He wrapped his arms around me. "Hmm?"

"Were you hoping I'd want to come with you?"

"Yeah," he said softly. "But I didn't want you to give up everything for me."

"You should know better than that... you are everything to me." I turned slightly and cupped his cheek with my hand.

He gave me a small smile, moving his head to kiss my palm. "But I'm no one Ali..."

"You're everything to me..." I said again, smiling at him.

"And you're the only thing that matters to me," he said softly before pressing his lips to mine. I deepened the kiss almost instantly. Tugging and fisting his hair with one hand while the other ran under his shirt and along his abs.

He groaned, pulling himself from me. "Ali Cat... save some for desert."

I giggled, "I love you, Nerdy Boy."

"Love you too, Ali Cat."

***~oOo~***

The next day I found myself at work, thinking once again about Jasper and Garrett. I loved Jasper, my whole heart belonged to him, I always knew this, I gave it to him when I was six years old and he never gave it back. But I promised myself to Garrett, I loved Garrett, in a completely different way than I loved Jasper but still.

Garrett was dependable, loyal, affectionate... crap I'm describing a dog.

Is that what Garrett deserved? To be treated like a dog?

Could I really give up Jasper? I mean, every part of my body longed for him; for his touch, for him to fill me, for his embrace.

I couldn't give up Jasper, but I also didn't fully trust him not to up and leave me again, not when I still didn't understand why he even left in the first place.

So what do I do? Give up the sure thing that my head is telling me to stay with, or go with my heart and possibly get burned again?

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End note: We love reviews... so leave one for us!


	21. Chapter 21

**DISCLAIMER:****  
We are not nor have we ever claimed to be Stephanie Meyer. All Twilight Characters belong to her, she makes the money off of the movies/book/music/shirts ect. We own the plot bunnies that infect our brain and use them to raise money for charity. Therefore, no money is in our bank from this.**

**K: Can I just say that I love how y'all pointed out Alice seeing Garrett as a dog? Cause I do. And I can tell y'all NB agrees wholeheartedly 100% lol**

**Robs: YAY! It's time... for a new chapter! Maybe NB can win y'all over ;)**

**Thanks to our beautiful, wonderful and always there for us, beta Amber!

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**JPOV:**

The past couple of days had been hectic. Between getting things ready so I could get permanently situated here in Forks and helping Ali Cat with wedding details, I honestly didn't know what day of the week it even was.

I was also starting to doubt that my plan was working. It almost seemed as if my being her friend and helping her out as needed was putting more of a strain on things. I could tell something was bothering her, not hard to figure out when you saw the little crease in her forehead as she chewed on her lip; but when I asked her what was wrong; she would just smile and say it was wedding stuff.

I told Ed and Emmett one night that I thought I was making it worse. If anything Alice had seemed more conflicted about us than I had intended. They both told me to stop making excuses.

I wasn't making excuses, well at least not for that. The only time I ever made excuses was when things started to go too far. I could see the hurt that flashed through Ali Cat's eyes when I put a stop to things or pushed her away, even though each time I really just wanted to say 'screw it' and give in. But I didn't want to make things harder on her. I know my Alice, it would hurt her more for her to be unfaithful to the man she promised to marry.

That's another thing. Aren't most girls excited to be planning their wedding? I know I'm not her fiancé, so my opinion is pretty much null in the matter, but if anything, she seemed to be dreading this.

Maybe I'm reading too much into things. I'm sure planning this extravagant event in such a short amount of time, without her fiancé has to be getting to her. Hell, I would be stressed too. Then again, I'm never getting married. Armani prick made sure of that by sweeping her up first.

_Stop it Whitlock…_

I had my own shit to worry about as well. The biggest one being Kelly. I know I didn't love her. But I didn't want to hurt her either. That was part of the reason I wasn't taking her calls. I knew if I talked to her I would tell her what happened with Alice. Yes, I'm an asshole for sleeping with Alice while having a girlfriend, but I'm not about to break up with her over the phone either.

Relocating back to Washington is being a bigger pain than I thought. My lease on my place in Tennessee isn't up until December and I don't want to pay two land lords, or piss my current one off. I had to figure out how I was going to move my things cross country without having to use the aid of a moving company.

_Never should have left in the first place._

I fell back onto the couch with a heavy sigh. Maybe I can just take over the lease for Bella's apartment at the end of the month. _I'm already here and know the place._

I looked at my watch and saw that it was twenty minutes to eleven. Alice was meeting with someone at one for a possible wedding location. Maybe I should surprise her and take her to lunch.

When I arrived at her office, the receptionist Kim greeted me with a warm and friendly smile. "Hi Jasper."

"Afternoon Ms. Kim. Is Alice available?" I asked.

Kim looked down at her desk before nodding. "Appears so, I'll let her know you're here."

I held my hand up. "No, it's okay. I wanted to surprise her."

Kim laughed and shook her head. "Alright then, to the left, third door down... Good luck."

I walked down to the office Kim indicated to see Alice with her head down the desk. Her door was open but I didn't want to intrude on her conversation.

I leaned against the door frame, barely able to hear her conversation until I heard his name.

"No 'Rhett, it's fine..." she said quietly. There was a long pause before she spoke again, "Ditto... see yah in a few days then. Bye." She sighed and hung up the phone.

I gently tapped the door frame making her look up at me. "Hey," I said with a smile.

"Hey!" she chirped, a wide smile crossing her face.

I stepped inside her office, "So I was thinking I would surprise you and take you to lunch before your meeting."

"Okay," She nodded, grabbing her purse. "Where are we going?"

I shrugged. "Depends on what you're in the mood for since I didn't think that far ahead."

She laughed, "Um a salad..."

"Salad it is," I laughed and walked with her out of the office. Once outside I held her car door open for her before getting into the passenger seat. "So are you excited about meeting with Logan today?"

She nodded a little distractedly.

"You excited to see Garrett soon?" Honestly, I didn't want to know the answer but I figured it was appropriate considering she was just on the phone with him.

She gave me a odd look, "Sure... I've gained some weight though." She chewed her lip.

I felt my eyebrow jump at that. "Is that why you want salad? Ali what's going on?"

"I need to lose weight," she sighed. "I've gained a few pounds, I know Garrett will notice..." She shook her head. "I know I look horrible, but look at how I've been eating..."

"You're insane you know that? And I'm sorry, but I think you're sexy as hell and if he's too much of a prick to appreciate you now..." I stopped myself and looked out at the city as we passed through. She was quiet all the way to the restaurant, waiting for me to start up a conversation again I assumed.

"Do you really think I'm sexy?" she asked quietly after she ordered her Caesar salad.

"Yeah, I do."

She tilted her head to study my face, "Why?"

That made me choke on my drink. "What do you mean?" I coughed out.

"Why do you find me sexy...what about me is so sexy to you?"

"Everything," _God that sounded like a cop out. _"You know I've always had a weakness for your legs, so those still get me every time. But you've changed so much. You've gone from this beautiful young woman to..." I waved my hand in her direction. "Trust me, you're not fat or anything remotely close. You've got amazing curves and any man who is lucky enough to touch and kiss every inch of your body, well... let's just say, I'm envious."

She smiled and blushed a little, "Thanks, it means a lot to me."

"Always..." I smiled at her, before slouching more in the booth. "So how's work?"

"Good, what about you?"

"Can't complain," I smiled at the waitress as she set our food down. "After all, I'm cleaning up the town, one DNA sample at a time," I joked.

She gave a small laugh as she picked at her food. I watched her as she seemed lost in thought.

"You know," I started, finally breaking the silence. "You can tell me what's bothering you. I remember someone once telling me that I was good sounding board..."

"I don't think I want to marry Garrett," she said quietly.

I gave her a small smile despite all the mental fist pumping I was doing. "Why? If you don't mind me being nosey."

"I love him but I'm not_ in_ love with him." She admitted, her eyes filled with sorrow as she looked at me. "I thought I could, but I know I can't. It's just not possible."

"I'm sorry." I suddenly felt as if it was my fault that she was sad.

"Why are you sorry?"

"I think I may have been going about this friendship thing the wrong way. My intention wasn't to hurt you."

"I'm glad you showed me that I didn't really love him, but I'm sad because I am going to hurt him." She sighed and picked at her salad, "I'm sorry to burden you with my troubles."

"It's no burden Ali Cat. I know it's asking a lot, but I want you to trust me enough to talk to me when somethings bothering you."

"Thanks," She smiled and took a bite.

"No problem at all," I smiled back and bit into a fry. "Considering your recent confession, did you still want to meet with Logan?"

She shrugged, "I hate making appointments and not keeping them, you know?"

I nodded. "Understandable. Honestly, I was a little shocked when you told me you were going to look at this hall. I always thought you wanted your wedding to be by the ocean."

"I did," she stated, "but that was for my wedding to you..." She blushed a little and looked back down at her plate.

"Oh... well now I feel like an ass," I laughed.

"Why?" she asked, looking back up at me.

"Because I should have known that?" I really didn't mean for it to come out as a question.

She rolled her eyes, "How were you supposed to know?"

"Because the beach was always our thing," I reached over and stole a crouton from her plate.

"Well, now you know," She smiled and took another bite, pretending to threaten me with her fork.

~*~oOo~*~

After lunch we went over to the hall that Alice has been considering for her wedding with Garrett. It was strange to think of all the things she had done over the past week, only to know that she was going to cancel it all.

A part of me was elated that she didn't love him enough to marry him, while the other part wondered why.

Logan, the coordinator for the venue, was very kind to Alice. I could tell that she was embarrassed to tell Logan that she was unsure if the wedding was going to continue, but the minute Logan smiled and said she understood, Alice relaxed.

I followed behind the girls as they talked. We were first shown the garden area where the ceremony would be held. It was nice, but not right for my Ali Cat. Then we were led into the ballroom. I let a low whistle out, not entirely surprised that it echoed through out the room. Logan went on to explain how the tables would be situated to maximize the dance floor. A good thing, if you're into that sort of thing.

I took Ali's hand just as Logan excused herself to take a call, pulling her to the center of the dance floor. Once there I spun her around few times, earning a genuine smile and a laugh.

"Had to see if the dance was good enough," I informed her when she raised her eyebrow at me.

"Sure Nerdy Boy... was that all?"

I laughed and pulled her closer to me. "Okay I may have wanted to hug my best friend, is that wrong?"

She shook her head, "No it's not."

I laughed and kissed the crown of her head.

"See, now I knew the minute you walked in that you two were the perfect couple!" Logan gushed making us both jump.

"Excuse me?" I asked.

Logan smiled. "I love seeing the Bride and Groom happy and in love," she explained.

"We're not engaged..." We said simultaneously.

**~*~*~ February 25th, 2005~*~*~***

We arrived at this camp almost a week ago after spending a few days in Yellowstone for Ali's eighteenth birthday.

Just on the border of Northwest Texas and New Mexico was where we found them, modern day gypsies who had welcomed us with open arms. Ali and I suspected that they were more like hippies that integrated various parts of the gypsy style into their own way of living. Either way it was freeing. The only worry I had was whether Alice was truly happy or not.

And judging by her smile as she danced around with some of the local girls, she was just that. Happy.

A few nights ago, Shawn, the king of all this, held a ceremony welcoming us as a part of their family. We were given new names. Ali was now Flutura, which I thought was appropriate for her. It meant butterfly and over the years I'd watched her transform into a beautiful woman, much like a caterpillar changes into a butterfly.

"She's very pretty Endrit, young but pretty." I looked up at the voice talking to see Shawn's wife, Maria, smiling in the direction of the girls dancing in the twilight. Alice already loved her new 'sister' Nettie. The two of them instantly bonded and became inseparable, or so it seemed.

"She's an adult," I defended. "And please, call me Jasper." I was given the name Endrit at the naming ceremony, which evidently meant light. I didn't quite understand Maria or Shawn's reasoning behind the name, besides I was just more comfortable with the name my mom gave me.

Maria sat down at the table next to me. "You care for her a great deal."

I nodded, wondering where she was going with this.

"It seems Flutura has other admirers in our midst." I looked at Maria just as she nodded her head in the direction of one of her other 'daughters'.

"Lucy?" I asked.

"Yes," She sighed as we both watched Lucy stare at Alice with longing, biting her lip the whole time. "I try to tell her that she shouldn't think such things, but she likes girls." Maria shrugged.

I smiled and shook my head. "Well, Ali Cat's a looker. I don't blame her one bit."

Maria laughed. "So, you plan on marrying her, yeah?"

_Whoa..._

I stared at Maria before looking back at Alice. "Yeah, if she'd have me. I tend to mess things up pretty easily," I admitted.

"What do you mean by that? Of course you do, you are a man, men always screw ever'thin' up."

I laughed and shook my head. "With Ali and me, it's complicated."

"I have time, explain away young man," She smiled at me and made herself comfortable, clinking a bit as she moved because of all the jewelry she wore.

"Well..." _Where the hell do I start?_ "I've hurt her before... twice actually. I'm honestly surprised she still wants me after what I've done."

"How have you hurt her?" She seemed to be studying me.

I scoffed and shook my head. "She told me she loved me and I panicked, told her that we could only be friends, then when she stuck to her guns I pushed her too far." I folded my arms on the table and rested my chin on them, watching as Alice played a game with the younger kids.

"You always hurt the ones you love..." She grew quiet for a moment. "Your _loves _are different."

"They are?" I looked up at her seeing a far off look in her rich brown eyes.

"Yes, your love is a bit more mature, a bit more rough, more primal; where as hers is pure, innocent... very much like your souls." She nodded thoughtfully.

"How do you figure?" I asked curiously. I get where she would see Ali as being pure and innocent.. _but me?_

"I can see it in your eyes, the way you look at each other. You've lived through much more than her, you want her in ways she doesn't fully comprehend." She looked towards Alice again.

"You can tell all that from my eyes?"

"You can tell a lot for someones eyes."

_Huh..._ "What do hers say? I mean besides being pure and innocent?"

"She's deeply in love with you, she'd do absolutely anything for you, but she's still very young and has much living to do. She's energetic, happy and very confident, most of the time anyway." Maria gave me a wry smile. "She is a good person."

I nodded, that was Ali to a 'T'. "Why did you ask about marriage?" I asked without thinking about it.

"Because you act like her husband." She responded simply.

"I do?" I thought I acted like the teenage boy that was in love with her.

"You try to provide for her, you take care of her, she cooks for you..." she smiled and shrugged.

"Oh!" I laughed and shook my head. "I would burn the house down if I cooked, she's far better at it." I shrugged. "I just want her happy, you know?"

"There's that too, and she would like you happy as well."

I sighed and looked back at Ali. "I'm happy as long as I have her and her love."

~*~oOo~*~

I packed up the last of our things into the back of the Santa Fe as Ali said good bye to the girls in Maria and Shawn's Caravan.

"Endrit, hold on there buddy," I turned to see Maria and Shawn coming toward me.

"Sorry, I was getting things ready to go, I wasn't leaving without a good bye," I explained, taking Shawn's extended hand and shaking it.

"We know," he said with a kind smile. "Maria and I wanted to give you two something. A gift to help you along your travels."

I raised my eyebrow at him as Maria smiled and held her arms out to me. I went to her and hugged her in return.

"You do know that you didn't have get us anything right?" I asked just as Alice joined us.

Shawn laughed. "We're fully aware of that Endrit. We just figured you and Flutura would appreciate a home to take with you on your travels."

I looked down at Ali as she wrapped her arms around my middle, hugging herself to my side. She looked up and shrugged, clearly just as confused as I was.

"A home away from home, if you will," Maria said with a smile, pointing to the small ninteen-sixties Airstream trailer two of the other guys were pulling in our direction.

"I noticed your SUV has a hitch and well, Maria and I have found our home," Shawn said, wrapping his arms around his wife.

"I... this... Thank you. Seriously. Thank you." I was stunned at the kindness these two, let alone the whole community, had shown us.

"Even a nomad needs a place to rest his head," Shawn said with a wink.

"We will miss you," Maria said with a sad little nod looking at us both seriously.

"Our paths will cross again," I smiled at her, remembering a reading she had done with her Tarot Cards.

With a rush of blonde hair and tanned skin, Lucy was on Alice, kissing her, hard and passionately for a minute before she pulled away, Alice looked shocked while Lucy looked really... happy.

"I will miss you Flutura." Lucy chirped, before turning and running back from where she came.

I bit as hard as I could on my cheek to keep from laughing at Alice's stunned look, but lost it when Shawn started laughing. Maria sighed and shook her head, "She likes the pretty girls..." Alice turned to me, gaping in disbelief.

"I was wondering how long it would take Lucy to do that," Shawn laughed. "Come here Flutura and give me hug before you two run off."

She walked over and hugged both Maria and Shawn, whispering something in Maria's ear before pulling back and saying, "Thank you so much for all your help."

I laced my fingers with hers when she came back over and we started for the car. "Do you want to investigate our new home now or later?" I asked her as we approached the sliver camper now attached to the hitch.

"Now," she said excitedly.

I laughed as I let go of her hand, watching her run to the door and swinging it open. "Well?" I asked once I joined her.

"I love it! We need to decorate... and move our stuff in here... but I love it," She bounced a little.

I smiled at her excitement. "Okay, first Target we see, we'll get some things and decorate a little. That sound good?"

She wrapped her arms around my shoulders and kissed me hungrily. "Yes! And then," she waggled her eyebrows suggestively, "We'll break her in?"

I nodded putting my arms around her waist and sliding my hands lower. "Remind me to also get condoms, we're out."

She chuckled as she kissed me on the neck, "Okay... but, we already did it a few times without, you're not gonna miss the feel?"

I cupped her ass in my hands giving it a squeeze and making her squeal. "Yes, but we ain't ready for a family yet. We don't want you getting pregnant."

"I know," she smiled serenely. "I just love the sounds you make," she giggled and bit her lip.

I smirked, "Well, it does feel petty great... Damn! Com'on, the sooner we find a Target the sooner we can get to breaking the bed in." She giggled as she trailed behind me, stopping me so that she could shut and lock the door.

"What ever happened to the old Airstream?" I asked the room, making the conversation come to a stand still.

"Um... I put it in storage a few months back...why?" Emmett asked, looking highly confused.

I shook my head. "No reason, I was just curious as to where it was. I might need it soon, once the lease is up on Bella's apartment." Rose's eyes went wide in shock at my words. "Oh yeah, I'm moving back." _Oops._

Alice's eyes went wide in surprise, but she kept her mouth shut. "Wow, man, you're really gonna move back?" Emmett sounded pretty excited for a guy who had so little sleep lately, between all the trips to the hospital to visit Payton and going to work, he hardly had any time for sleep.

"Yeah... The only reason I was staying there was my job," I shrugged and tried to figure out what was up with Ali.

"About time you realized where you belong," Rose snapped. "And _she _better not be coming with you. Trash belongs on the side of the road and that's where she'll stay. I'll be damned if she thinks she can get anywhere near Ali's trailer."

Bella laughed at Rose's outburst. "Tell us how you really feel there Rose." Rose snorted in response and shook her head. I expected Edward to say something, but he didn't, he just smirked.

I rolled my eyes. "No Rose, she's not coming with me."

"Did you break up with her?" She asked with a hopeful look.

I shook my head and looked at my drink. "Not yet."

* * *

End Note: Okay time for some serious business. Regardless of what you've read in this story or in our past stories, **WE DO NOT** advocate the neglect of using birth control or partaking in safe sex practices. That's why we pointed it out in OMS: Alice was on the pill, still got pregnant. DaS: Kitten was supposedly unable to have children, yet Holden was born. Please be responsible, make him wrap it up too! Regardless of how easy twific might make parenthood seem, it's not. Take the word of the two mother's behind this story (Robs and Amber). /soapbox


	22. Chapter 22

**Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight and such. K owns a blackberry that's about to be thrown in front of a train; Robs has a sparkley (shit you not) laptop with sims3.**

**K is having technical difficulties at the moment. Please stand by…**

**Robs: Well... we know that Alice knows that she shouldn't marry Garrett... what do you think she is going to do about it?**

**Special thanks to Amber, our super awesome beta!

* * *

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**APOV**

A few days after Jasper announced that he was moving back to town – a fact which he told _me_ before anyone else… which, frankly, came as a shock to me – Garrett came home.

I was definitely planning going to break off the engagement, but I wasn't sure if I wanted to break up with him totally or not, because I mean, how would it look? My Ex comes back to town and suddenly I dump my boyfriend?

I asked Garrett to come over to my place and I think we might've gotten our signals mixed up because the second he arrived he was all over me, kissing and touching me with meaning. I pulled away, trying to hint to him that we seriously needed to talk. He wasn't listening, instead he kept on kissing and nibbling on my neck while groping me. We'd been in this situation before, sometimes he just gets really horny being away from me and wants me so much that he can't help himself. But I was starting to get worried, I had definitely told him to stop, that I wanted to talk and even pushed against him a few times.

_What the hell? _

Before I could freak out too much, Garrett finally moved away from me. I felt relieved until I realized that he didn't willingly move of his own accord.

"Let the lady talk," Nerdy Boy said while shoving Garrett slightly. I gaped at him, then at the open door, _had Garrett left that open?_

"Why the fuck are_ you_ here?" He glared at Jasper.

"My sister asked me to drop something off for her. Someone left the door open and I heard Ali telling someone to stop. Would you want an attacker hurtin' her?" Jasper challenged.

Garrett just glared, "Um..." I cleared my throat, getting their attention. "Rhett, I don't think we should get married right now..."

Garrett gaped at me, "What? Why baby? Are you having second thoughts, everyone has those, it'll go away," he said, edging closer to me.

"No," I shook my head. Garrett stared, then narrowed his eyes before looking between me and Jasper.

"This is cause of him isn't it? You're doin this because the asshole who left you while you were fucking pregnant came back?" I shook my head in protest, but he wasn't listening. "Fuck you! Just so you know, I've been fucking Katie, my assistant for the past three months. I was hoping marriage would thaw that icy exterior of yours, but I guess not. Have a nice life." He spat, turning and walking out the front door while I tried to catch my breath.

_He'd been cheating on me? For three months? Three whole months?_

_OhmyGod, I was just trying to put off the engagement till I figured things out. Did he just break up with me?_ My knees buckled and I suddenly felt the wood of my floor under them just as the hot tears rushed down my cheeks. "How could he?" I wailed. I felt Jasper's presence as he wrapped me in his arms, pulling me to him as I cried.

I clung as he cradled me in his arms and carried me into my room and laid me on the bed before he rushed out of the room, but before I could wonder where he was going I heard the front door shut and lock. When he returned he laid down next to me and pulled me close.

"I'm sorry Ali Cat," he whispered into my hair as he gently rubbed my back.

"Three months?" I sounded as miserable as I felt.

"Want me to kick his ass?" he offered.

"Yes," I sobbed, "Actually no, but it felt good to say yes."

He chuckled softly. "Can I kick his ass and call it a science experiment?"

_I couldn't help but laugh at that, N.B. and his science experiments_.

***~*~* November 11****th**** 2003 *~*~***

We laid on our sides on his standard issue, extra long twin bed. I was glad that Edward was off someplace with Bella and not here at the college, because I knew that if he were anywhere near campus Jasper would not be touching me the way he was. His palm rubbing circles into my stomach as his fingers ghosted along the waistband of the WU sweats I was wearing, completely distracting me from watching the hotness that was Ben Affleck and Josh Hartnett on the TV screen.

It had been a while since I'd been anywhere near to being this close to him, but right now, I could feel the bulge in his jeans perfectly up against the crack my ass, which in and of itself was completely distracting.

With every stroke of his hand I felt myself getting incredibly turned on, especially when I noticed it getting lower and lower with each circle he made. I bit my lip hard to keep from moaning out when the tips of his fingers finally made their way inside the sweats, I felt my nipples stiffen completely of their own accord. I pushed back into him, rubbing my ass against his rigid dick. His hand stopped moving and he pressed his palm flat, his fingertips barely an inch from the top of my thong panties.

My eyes flickered back to the screen just as the infamous sex in the parachutes scene was happening. I realized I was still rubbing my ass against him when I heard him groan and felt him pressing into me with a roll of his hips. I almost smiled from how smug and sexy I suddenly felt.

"You like this scene I take it?" I said a little breathlessly, "I didn't think it was _that_ hot."

"And why not?" he asked, sounding insulted.

"Cause, like, they aren't doing very much."

"And you base this opinion on?" he asked, leaning over my shoulder a little.

"I guess it's like romantic…" I shrugged, trying to be nonchalant about his hand down my pants. "But I've kissed hotter than that."

"Have you now?" _Was it just me or did he sound smug as he said that?_

"I have." I rubbed my ass against him again, just to let him know I did indeed mean with him.

"Perhaps for scientific purposes we need to have an um…" He cleared his throat. "Experiment. I mean it could be that maybe that Josh kid aint your type." He gently ran his fingers across my lower abdominals. _Josh Hartnett is everyone's type, but crap, with him touching me like this. Josh who?_

"A scientific experiment huh? And who would you say is my type then?" I asked playfully as I leaned back into him.

I felt him shrug, "I don't know Ali."

_Seriously, he doesn't know?_ I rubbed my ass harder against him, "You don't know?"

"I uh... I don't know your type?" he sounded distracted.

"Well what's your type?"

"What does that have to do with the experiment? That's an outside variable that has no relevance to your hypothesis."

I sighed, "Okay so what did you want to prove with your scientific experiment?"

"Technically it's yours. But you're saying that because they aren't doing much in that scene that it's not hot. Romantic yes, hot no. Correct?" I nodded in response. "Well based on that hypothesis, if you will, you should experiment." I turned my head to see him blushing slightly. "Maybe trying to just have one simple act with maybe me, only cause we're here now of course, and see if your hypothesis is correct."

I rolled onto my back, "Wanna dumb that down for me Doogie?"

He shook his head and smiled at me, "You're not dumb Alice. I was just trying to say that maybe we could test your theory…" He bit his lip, he looked really cute when he did that.

"With you?" I asked with a small squeak and a blush.

"Well I mean, sure if you want. I just figured, you know since we're here you could use me if you want." He gave me a rather sexy half smile.

"Okay," I agreed a little breathless. _Crap, I didn't mean to sound like that_. "Um... we should like listen to music or something right?"

"Yes! Of course! Shit, I mean yeah, hold on." He got up to get the stereo remote. "Uh, anything in particular?" he asked rubbing the back of his neck.

I chewed my lip as I considered it, he had much better musical taste than me. "Lifehouse is supposed to be all romantic sex music right?"

"Sex?" His voice broke and squeaked.

I sat up on my elbows, "You…" _Are you a virgin? Wait, that's none of my business_. I cleared my throat. "I mean um... like I'm a virgin of course, but like... I dunno…"

"I, uh, wouldn't know." He shook his head and put the disk in. "No, Lifehouse is good." He said with a nod and I flopped back onto the bed. _My Nerdy Boy was still a virgin? _This place was crawling with slutty girls and somehow he'd managed to bypass them all? I heard the soft melody float out from the speakers just before I felt the bed next to me shift and he laid down next to me. I turned to look at him and he looked into my eyes and brushed my hair behind her ears. "You sure about this?"

I chewed my lip out of nervousness. "If you want to, I mean it is my experiment after all."

"Right." He said with a smile, after he took his glasses off, he cupped my cheek and brushed his thumb across my lips. His eyes darted up from my lips after a minute and he stared intensely into my eyes. It was all too much, he leaned in then whispered, "Breathe Ali," I didn't even know I had been holding my breath. He pressed his lips against mine and everything but him and his lips fell away.

The sensation was mind numbing, I wrapped my arms around his neck and laced my fingers through his hair as he deepened the kiss, his tongue massaging mine gently. Without removing his lips, he moved himself so that he was between my thighs, leaning his weight on his forearms. Our kiss went from sweet to frenzied very quickly, I arched my back so I could press myself against him, earning a groan and a grind of his hips into mine.

I felt him shift to lean his weight on one arm as his hand slid up the front of my tank and groped me through my bra. I moaned into his mouth. With that he rolled us so I was on top of him and took advantage of this to wiggle my hips into his very obvious erection while kissing him, both of us moaning into the other's mouth at the feeling. He moved his hands behind my back and struggled a little with the clasp on my bra before getting it undone, I broke our kiss to pull the bra off and out from under my tank.

My eyes met his half-lidded grayish-blue ones. His breathing was labored, as I felt my chest heaving, I leaned back down to recapture his lips. The minute he palmed the flesh of my breasts in his hands and squeezed them gently I sat back up arching my back and grinding my now soaked center into his arousal. He took advantage of this opportunity to roll us again so I was on my back and my stomach was bared, locking eyes with me he lowered his head and left wet, open mouthed kisses on my skin as he continued to knead my left breast with his left hand, his right hand pushing my shirt higher as he kissed his way higher.

"Jasper!" I moaned out as he took one of my hardened nipples into his mouth and gently sucked. "Ohmygawdd." I whined, fisting his hair in my fingers as he gently ran his teeth against it. He moved a little so that his erection was now against my hip and the thumb of his left hand was rubbing against my bottom lip as his mouth teased my left nipple distracting me from his right hand that was journeying south.

My head fell back and I moaned, my mind going blank as one of his long fingers slid in between my wet folds and he softly rubbed my clit, making my stomach knot. _Shit, it feels so good to have him touch me._ I fisted his flannel sheets as I tried desperately to regain conscious thought. He continued his soft grazing with his finger as I moved my hand so I could touch the lean muscles of his side under his shirt.

"Jasper, take off your clothes, please?" I begged, my voice barely above a whisper. He stopped what he was doing to sit on knees next to me and pulled off his shirt, his muscles rippling as he did so. Jasper might be a geek, but he is one sexy as fuck geek.

He looked at me, his eyes smoldering as I too pulled my shirt off. "Better?" he asked.

I pouted a little at him and hooked my fingers into the waist band of his jeans and tugged lightly. "I wanna touch you too." I told him, pleading with my eyes. I wanted him to think of me as more than just Edward's kid sister and his best chick friend. I wanted him to desire me, the way I desired him, to love me the way I loved him.

He looked at me, his eyebrows furrowed as he chewed his lip. Well fuck, he isn't saying no, he just looked unsure. I sat up on my knees and locked eyes with him while I popped the button and unzipped his jeans, pushing them down to his knees. I broke eye contact and watched him as he moved to pull the jeans off and toss them on the floor, noticing the head of his penis straining against the waistband of his boxers. I swallowed hard and met his eyes again as I slid his boxers down, his cock springing free and lightly smacking against my chest because of how close I was.

I heard his breathing hitch as I wrapped my hand around as much of him as I could and started to stroke his velvety soft skin. Not breaking eye contact I lowered my mouth and licked the underside of his dick, leaving a wet kiss on the plump head. His eyes grew wide and his breathing became shaky as I opened my mouth as wide as I could and wrapped my lips around the head, my hand still pumping him. I didn't know shit about giving head, other than your supposed to suck, so suck I did.

"Oh fuck," He groaned, his hips thrusting forward a little. His reaction was getting me even more worked up, I wanted him to keep on touching me, but I knew his sweatpants I was currently wearing were getting in the way. I stopped what I was doing, stripped them and my panties off, flinging then into the pile with his jeans.

I looked back up just as he cupped my face and kissed me gently, pushing me so my back was against the sheets again. My heart started to hammer in my chest as I realized we were both naked, together, and kissing, and if he tried to pop my cherry I wasn't going to stop him. He broke the kiss and began kissing and licking his way down my neck while his hands ghosted my sides and grabbed my hips rather roughly when his lips met my navel, his tongue lightly flicking out and made me moan when I realized what he was planning on doing.

He spread my thighs and situated himself between my legs, looking up at me as he lowered his face and licked me gently, almost teasingly. I fisted the sheet and fell back onto the bed as I felt that knot in my stomach tighten up again. His tongue found my clit as he slid one of his long fingers into me, a slight stab of pain running through me as he pumped and sucked on my clit. I moaned from the pain and pleasure, and from how good he was with his mouth. I held on to the sheets hard to keep from pressing his face further into my crotch as he slid a second finger into me and picked up tempo, licking and sucking my nub like a pro.

My legs were shaking as I got closer, the pressure in my belly intense, but there seemed to be no relief in sight. "Jas-purr," I panted, "Please, fuck me. Please." I begged, knowing that from everything I heard, it would feel really, really good right about now.

He lifted his head and looked at me. "Okay... wait, shit... your brother… Ali, he'll kill me."

"You planning on telling him? Cause I sure as fuck ain't."

"Well no, I just mean," He nodded his head in the direction of a jar of condoms on the desk. "He counts those before he leaves and when he returns." _Well shit, fucking Edward and his random OCD ways_. I almost laid back and told him to do it without one, I was on the pill for my skin anyway, but then I remembered. Chewing my lip while looking at him I reached over the side of the bed and pulled out the condom they gave me at school yesterday during the safe sex assembly.

"They gave these out at school yesterday." I told him quietly, holding up the yellow plastic wrapped condom. He raised an eyebrow at me and smirked.

"And you thought you'd need it." _Shit, now he knows I was hoping, praying really, for something to happen_.

"I didn't wanna leave it in my room at home." I looked down because I couldn't lie looking into his eyes like that.

"Hey," I felt his finger under my chin, forcing me to look at him. He smiled at me gently, looking so damn cute, I almost forgot we were both naked. "Do you really want this? I mean this is a big step."

"Were you not just fingering me like two minutes ago? Can you not tell how much I want it?" I asked him, giving him an eyebrow, he smiled at me.

"I'm just checking jeez." He looked away and chewed on his lip. _Wait what if he didn't want me?_

"You don't have to if you don't want me." I told him softly, hoping I could hold back the tears if he did reject me. His eyes shot back over to me as he gave me an eyebrow.

"I want you, Alice." _That's new_. I thought, but decided to not over think and just go with it. I licked my lips and tried my best to give him an alluring look.

"Then take me Jazz." I said in a husky voice. He leaned forward and pressed his lips to mine, taking the condom from my hand. He broke our kiss to unroll the condom over his member and position himself at my entrance, I could feel myself tense up a little in anticipation. He must have sensed it too because he leaned down and kissed me passionately, making me relax as he thrust himself into me, causing both of us moan in unison.

It was definitely a different experience, having him stretching me out. It didn't hurt that badly though, I mean it was a little uncomfortable at first, but as he started to thrust in and out, and I moved my hips to meet his, that coil in my stomach wound tighter and tighter.

He rolled us so that we were both sitting, and I was in his lap with him still sheathed inside of me. I reached over his shoulders and grabbed the top of the headboard as his hands found purchase on my hips and helped me move on him, drawing me closer to the edge and I wanted it so badly. I bucked harder as his lips kissed and nipped anywhere he could reach.

"God Jazz… so good…" I managed to pant out, bucking even harder as his hips thrust up to meet mine, his mouth finding the soft spot behind my ear and sucked lightly on it, sending me crashing over the edge. I moaned his name in a voice I had never heard before and heard him groan my name against my chest as he came a few seconds after me, pulling my body close as he trembled from the power of his own orgasm.

When we came down, he pulled out and trashed the condom, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me close to him. I rested my chin on his chest and stared at the perfection that was his face, he looked back at me and gave me a little half smile before kissing me gently. "You're beautiful you know that?"

He was so sweet, I had to fight the urge to blurt out that I was in love with him and doodled Mrs. Jasper Whitlock on most of my notebooks. "Not compared to you." I told him, being as honest as I could.

He smiled, "Nah, I pale in comparison," he said and bit his lip.

I rolled my eyes, but before I could argue I yawned. "Whatever." I finally said.

He wrinkled his nose, "I ruined it huh?"

"Nah." I hugged him. "That was…"

He kissed my shoulder. "Amazing?" he offered.

"Yeah." I sounded breathless again. "It wasn't what I expected."

He nodded, "Yeah…"

"Are.. I mean, were you a virgin?" He didn't answer, he just blushed. "Jazz?" He diverted his eyes and nodded. "I'm sorry I didn't know, you…" _Crap._ I felt my face get hot and I couldn't look at him anymore. So I looked down at the sheet. "You were probably saving yourself huh? And then.. I…" _seduced you. Holy... am I that girl?_ I buried my face into his side. "Oh gawd."

He laughed at that. "No, Alice it's okay."

_Is it really? Is he just saying that? Did he really like it? What does this make us now? Does he expect it again..._ "God I am just thinking about way too much right now, I need to, like, shut my head up." He kissed me, softly but filled with passion, it definitely shut my head up. "So did you, uh, wanna do it again? Like sometime?" I asked, feeling stupid.

"How about this, we let things go naturally, like, no pressure?" He blushed before adding, "I mean if you want to do it again I'm not gonna complain."

I kissed him again, another slow passionate kiss. "I could go again, right now." He looked at me like I was crazy. _Okay or not._ "Just kidding." I lied.

"We will again," another kiss, "I promise."

"Sooo um… you want me to buy the condoms and I'll hide them in my bag and bring them with me when I come up here?"

He blushed again. "Nah, I'll get them." He looked down and smiled shyly, "You just make sure your here for me to use them, 'kay?"

I nodded, trying my best not to explode with happiness. "How are you gonna hide them from E?"

"He stays out of my bio stuff." He waggled his eyebrows like Emmett did when he was getting into trouble.

"I love the way your mind works!" I squealed and kissed him hard on the mouth.

"That's why it's good to keep a nerd nearby," he said with a smirk.

"You're my sexy as fuck nerd."

He kissed my forehead, "I think you need to sleep silly Ali."

"You don't want me to get dressed first?"

"Shit, good point... Here," he reached for his shirt that was crumpled up on the floor. Inside I was squealing with delight.

"And hand me just the sweatpants too... if Em randomly shows up again... Yeah."

"Good point again." He smiled and handed me the sweatpants I had been wearing earlier.

Well that takes care of me... "Um as much as I love your naked body, shouldn't you put something on too?"

He blushed, "I was going to." He sounded defensive, I just smiled at him as he pulled a clean pair of sweatpants on. "Better?"

I looked down and could see the outline of his cock. I wiggled to ease the want a little and giggled. "You're naked under the sweatpants." _Oh God now I sound like a kid._

He crawled next to me on the bed and smirked. "So are you Ali," he said before tickling my sides softly. I giggled a little more before pushing his hands up to my breasts.

"Yep totally commando…" I winked at him. "In case you feel the urge to molest me during the night."

His face went scarlet. "I'll keep that in mind."

"Wanna join me in the shower tomorrow?" Since I already made myself sound like a wanton whore for him already.

"Well it is a co-ed shower." He agreed, sounding a little confused.

_Oh crap, he so didn't understand what I meant,_ my face got hot again as I said, "Like, be in me?"

"I... yeah... I mean... wow... but anyone could find us." He stammered.

"We'll lock the door... and it's Sunday, we'll go in all early before anyone gets up."

He bit his lip and nodded before burying his face in my hair. "You're a little minx aren't you?"

_Oh geez_. My face got hotter. "Only around you, I really like you Jazz."

"I really like you too Ali." He pulled me closer to him.

That made me happy, really happy. I yawned again. "Did you wanna watch another movie?"

"If you want it'd just be background noise for me you know that."

I guess he was tired too. I shook my head, "Just music."

He kissed my temple. "Get some sleep baby, we got an early morning." He said before pulling the chain on his table lamp and sending us into near darkness.

"'Kay." I smiled huge; I was getting my Nerdy Boy. I looked over at him and watched as he closed his beautiful eyes. _I love you_.

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**End note: Reviews are love.**


	23. Chapter 23

**Disclaimer: We do not own the twilight saga or any recognizable characters and such. Just this plot and variations of the canon characters.**

***somewhere there's a shrill cry of a bird as a hover craft appears and drops the chapter in the middle of the arena before it disappears*

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**JPOV**

I was grateful that my sister asked me to Ali's to return the damn casserole dish. When I told her I would do it later, she insisted that I had to do it immediately.

When I got to her condo, I could clearly hear her struggling with someone. Naturally my training kicked in when I noticed the door was left open. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't relieved that it was only Garrett, but that seemed to make me even more pissed.

I wanted to deck him when he hurt Alice with his words, but I was stunned honestly. I've never liked the guy, but for him to throw out his infidelity and admit to using the wedding as a way to get her to warm up to him, that was low.

But I had no room to talk. Here I was hoping that their marriage wouldn't happen, after I left her when she needed me the most.

She loved him, I know she did. She even told me so, but to hear the pain as she cried, it tore at me from the inside out. I wanted to run after him and kick his ass, or call Edward and let him do it, and comfort her all at once.

I gave her the one thing I knew she needed the most; stayed to care for her.

I laid with her all night and held her as she cried. I tried making her laugh, succeeding several times, but the tears always won out.

In the morning she called into work, using the excuse that she needed some personal time. I didn't want to leave her, especially now, but I had to complete my work before leaving.

I had expected the day to go much slower than it did. But before I knew it four in the afternoon came and I was heading back to Ali Cat's condo.

I decided that tonight I was going to show her that I still loved her. Sure my timing was off, but I figured if she wanted to try to get things back to how they were when I got back, I should show her that I want it too.

I pulled my bike up in front of the sushi place in town that Bella and Rose claimed was Ali's favorite, when I saw him. The Armani prick was already out, parading some blonde woman around. I was honestly shocked he had moved on so quickly with this chick I could only presumed was his assistant, Kate.

He looked over at me and I saw him tense up. _Good,_ I thought as I got off the bike. "Garrett! Funny seeing you so _soon_," I taunted.

He rolled his eyes at me, but didn't say anything. "Oh, I'm sorry did I interrupt something?" I asked, focusing my attention on his companion.

"No, we were just heading to the museum," She smiled at me.

"Where are my manners? I'm Jasper," I held my hand out to her.

"Kate," she responded, shaking my hand as Garrett glared.

"Pleasure meeting you." I glanced at Garrett before looking back at Kate. "Do you mind if I speak to Garrett real quick? I forgot to tell him something the last time we spoke and it's important."

She smiled and shook her head. "No, of course."

I walked to the side of the building where there was an alley and waited for Garrett to follow. "This better be good," he snarled.

"Oh it will be," I said before shoving him against the wall, holding him up with my forearm pressed against his neck. He tried to fight back and talk shit which only made me laugh. "Don't say a word prick, the more you do that, the more pressure my arm will place on your esophagus aiding in your asphyxiation, so if you have plans to continue fucking your secretary I suggest you stop and listen to me."

He stopped struggling and looked at me, his eyes showing signs of panic.

"Good, now listen carefully. You never deserved her. I may have hurt her and left her when she needed me, but I _never_ made her self-conscious or joked to her brother about fucking someone else. You come anywhere near her again and I will release the hounds. Believe me… You don't _ever_ want to cross Edward and Emmett when it comes to Ali Cat." He glared at me in response and I applied a little more pressure as I leaned in to whisper in his ear. "And as far as her being a fridged bitch... you couldn't be more wrong," I pulled back to see the confused look on his face, making me smirk.

"I just have to say, _nothing_ feels better than when she cums around _my cock_ especially like she did a few weeks ago. I guess you just didn't know how to get her hot," I taunted, letting go of him.

He leaned against the wall gasping for air. "You fucking asshole," he rasped out.

I laughed. "I'm the asshole? Right." I rolled my eyes before pulling my fist back and hitting him square in the face which made a sickening crunching noise. "That's for hurting Alice in ways you'll never understand." I saw the blood on his face and smiled before leaving him in that alley.

"He'll be back in a few moments. So sorry to keep you," I said politely to Kate before bidding her farewell.

When I got to Ali Cat's condo, I entered the code to get into the building before making my way up to her place. I called her to let her know I was coming over with dinner so she said she would leave the door unlocked.

"Ali I'm here!" I called out as I closed and locked the door.

"Be right down!" she called back from her office in the loft. I made my way to the kitchen to unload the bags of sushi I picked up. "Oh my God, did you get me sushi?" A.C.'s happy voice drifted over to me.

"Oh my God, I did!" I mimicked her enthusiasm.

She scowled at me playfully. "I would've jumped on you and said thank you, but now you ruined that."

I snapped my fingers in disappointment, wincing slightly. "Damn that hurt..." I muttered. "Anyway, I figure sushi would be a good comfort food."

"Thank you," She smiled, giving me a kiss on the cheek.

"You're very welcome. Thank God for California rolls or I'd starve," I teased before popping one in my mouth. "Table or living room?" I asked, picking up a few of the plates.

"Doesn't matter, where are you most comfortable?"

"Uh huh, your dinner surprise, you pick. Otherwise we'll eat right here in the kitchen," I teased, knowing how much she hated that.

"Living room... We can watch movies," she suggested.

I nodded and started heading that way. "By the way, there's Sake in the bag."

"Tryin' to get me drunk?"

I laughed and shook my head. "Of course not. I just thought wine with dinner... and since Sake is Japanese wine I figured it'd go well with sushi."

She laughed a little. "And getting me drunk so you could take advantage of me didn't cross your mind?" she asked with a small smile.

I smirked, "No, why would I do something like that? You know I like you sober."

"I like you when you're drunk," she winked.

I laughed, setting the plates down on the table. "Well... lucky for you, your computer is upstairs."

"Why, you planning on taking me over a desk again, Nerdy Boy?"

_She keeps purring like that I just might_, I thought. "Actually, not right now... we have to talk."

"Okay..." She looked a little nervous.

"It's not bad, I promise," I gave her a smile. "It's just I'm leaving for Tennessee tomorrow and I wanted you to know that I'm coming back... but... I just... I wanted to know your thoughts... about us..."

She finished chewing the piece of sushi she had in her mouth before answering, "I'm still in love with you."

I couldn't help the grin on my face. "I'm still in love with you too, Alice..."

"So... what do you wanna do about that?" she asked, chewing on her lip.

"Well... I want to try again. But do things differently though." I took her hand in mine. "If you want to, that is."

She smiled, "Yeah, I do. I mean, it might seem kinda soon, but... I want it if you do."

"We don't have to jump into it. I just want to be yours again, you know? I missed you."

"I want to be yours too, I feel like I never really left you, you know? Like when you left, you took a part of me."

I nodded. "I think I left a big part of myself here as well... and it took me coming back to realize it."

"Did you miss me while you were away?" she asked, lacing her fingers with mine.

"I did." I admitted. "I even tried to forget you... but I couldn't."

"What did you think about?"

"Everything... at times I would think I could hear you laughing when I did something stupid at work. I would remember the way you'd let me cry when I had those dreams about my parents. I would miss the way you'd kiss me when you thought I was going to say something embarrassing, or even just to shut me up when I rambled."

The corner of her mouth curled up into a smile. "I missed you so much too."

"I'm sorry I left Ali... I want to make it up to you."

"How do you plan on doin' that N.B.?"

"Honestly... I don't know." I looked down at our hands. _How do you fix something like that?_

"This was a good start," She smiled. "Are you sure when you go back Kelly isn't gonna figure out a way to keep you there?"

I nodded and leaned my head against the couch. "Yeah I'm sure. That's why I'm leaving so early tomorrow, I want to have time to pack up all my stuff before she gets home from work."

"When are you coming back..."

I rubbed my face with my free hand and sighed. "Uh, I'm hoping three days tops. I'm driving back though so could be longer could be less, depending on the weather and roads."

"I'll miss you," She blushed. "That's kinda dumb huh?"

I shook my head. "No, not dumb. I was toying with the idea of taking you with me, but I didn't want you to be exposed to the crazy ex."

"Soon to be ex," she corrected. "I could handle her."

I laughed. "I'm sure you could Ali Cat."

"But?"

"But nothing. I just think it's easier for me to go out there, do what I got to do and come back," I shrugged.

"Okay... If you really don't want me to protect you from the _she-devil_..." she teased.

"Oh, you think you can protect me?" I looked at her amused.

She sat a little straighter. "I may be little, but I'm fiesty."

I laughed and smiled at her. "You're beautiful you know that?"

"You really think so?"

"I do. Even when you're in PJs you're beautiful." I tugged on the leg of her flannel pants.

She blushed and smiled before looking at our joined hands. "Did you want to stay tonight?"

"I'd like that."

She smiled and took another bite of sushi. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Of course."

"How did you go from dating someone like Kayla to dating the crazy trashy version of me?"

I spit my sake out in surprise. "Kayla?" _How the hell did she know about Kayla?_

"Um when I went to Tennessee... I met her," She chewed her lip.

"What? When? Why? How come no one told me?" So many questions ran through my mind.

"About two years ago..." She chewed her lip nervously. "I wanted to ask you why you left, I wanted to confront you... but compared to her I looked frumpy and fat and gross... she was really nice to me though."

"Yeah, she's a sweetheart. Too good for me. Wait, you met her?" I was seriously confused.

"Yeah, at Applebees...she saw me sittin' by myself so she came over to talk to me..."

I shook my head, _what was it with the women leaving me out of things?_ "Wow," was all I could say.

"Answer my question," she said impatiently.

"Alright, Alright... relax..."

**~*~*~April 16th, 2008~*~*~**

"Jasper! You're still here?" A female voice asked from behind me. I spun in my chair to see Detective Morgan leaning against the door frame.

She was attractive, but not my type. _Not like my type had been working for me lately. _I knew she had a thing for me, hell, the whole department seemed to know this. I kept passing on her obvious attempts to get me alone. Why? She was a tall, leggy, blonde... the pantsuits she wore made one think that she could quite possibly be Hugh Heffner's next girlfriend if he saw her. She was also quiet, and a people pleaser.

_Everything Alice isn't. _A voice said in my head. Jesus, almost three years and I _still_ can't get her out of my mind.

"Jasper?"

"Oh sorry. Yeah still here," I gave her a tight smile.

She looked at her watch and smiled. "I know Amber doesn't want to pay overtime so you, my friend, need to hang the coat up."

"I'm just finishing up in here. You know, procedure."

She nodded. "You're a good guy, Jasper." _No I'm not_, I thought as she turned to leave. "Oh, we're all going to O'Mally's for a celebratory drink. You should stop by, since the case would still be open if you hadn't found the paper trail..."

I shook my head. "Just my job and thanks... I'll think about it."

I don't know what made me go to the pub, but I did. Drink after drink, I found myself relaxing and talking to Detective Morgan - Kelly - more and more. Innocent flirting turned into more and before I knew it she was in my bed.

When she asked me out to dinner the next night, I told her I wanted to keep things casual, see how things go.

That was my first mistake.

I used work as an excuse for why we couldn't be serious, much like using Edward as the excuse with Ali-Cat. As time progressed I found myself comparing Kelly to Alice. Kelly swore, drank and smoked. Alice only swore with reason, didn't drink as much or smoke. She got me to talk about my past, wanted more information about my friends and family, but every time Alice came up in a story, she'd roll her eyes or groan. Even Kayla tried to warn me. She said the attraction wasn't normal. I just laughed it off and told her it was fine.

I tried my hardest to not think about Ali while I was with Kelly. After all, she moved on and according to Rose she was happy with her newest beau. _I deserved the same right?_

A month later, Kelly had managed to move into my apartment. It bothered me because this was my space, it held my secrets, but I suppose it made sense, she spent more time here than she did at her own place.

"You know, I think we should have sushi tonight," Kelly suggested as she sat on the couch.

"No," I stated plainly.

"Why not? It's delicious."

"It's raw fish, fish that live in bacteria filled waters. It's disgusting."

"Awww... but _Jasper,_ I want sushi," She pouted.

"Then go eat it, just do not bring into my house." I rubbed my hands over my face pushing my glasses up.

She laughed. "God, you're a dick. If you don't like raw fish then get California Rolls, those are cooked."

_Yeah, I know because that's all I'd eat when Alice wanted sushi_. I snapped back in my head. "No, I don't want that shit in my apartment!"

"_Our,_ Jasper… Our apartment," she tried to correct.

"Until your name is on the lease, it's _my_ apartment. If you don't like it, there's the door," I pointed at the front door and immediately felt bad when I saw the hurt flash across her face.

She got up and made her way to me, straddling my lap. "Is my poor lab tech stressed out?"

"I don't want to do this right now Kel," I pushed her off my lap.

She stood up in a huff. "If I was fucking Alice you'd be all over me!" she shouted storming towards the bedroom. "Face it Jasper, you weren't good enough for her!"

_She was right._

I opened the door to the apartment and was grateful that I was alone. I knew hell was gonna be paid when Kelly got here and honestly, I just wanted to get the bulk of my things packed before she got home.

I carried the boxes into the office and carefully started to pack up my comic books. It may seem silly that a grown man would be as protective as I was over these, but I had a lot of Stan Lee's first edition books. I'll be damned if they got ruined.

My mind was racing with things I had to do before Kelly got back. I had to separate my stuff into three categories; going with me, ship to Emmett, and sell. I knew the majority of my furniture would be sold. I couldn't very well fit a desk from Ikea in the trunk space of the Prius.

Things like my comic books and collectibles were getting shipped to Emmett and Rose. They said that they would take care of them until I found my own place. Then my clothes, movies, Mom and Dad's possessions, and work stuff was going with me in the car.

Just as I was labeling the last of five comic book boxes, I heard the unmistakable sound of Kelly's shoes on the hardwood floor.

"Jasper?" she called out.

"Office Kel," I answered, almost wishing I hadn't. I could hear her footsteps pick up as she hurried towards the office. She tackled me on the floor, kissing me everywhere she could.

"I'm so glad you're home, I missed you so much!"

I pushed her away. "Kel, we gotta talk."

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**End note: 10 points if you get the a/n reference. You know the drill :)**


	24. Chapter 24

**DISCLAIMER:****  
We are not nor have we ever claimed to be Stephanie Meyer. All Twilight Characters belong to her, she makes the money off of the movies/book/music/shirts ect. We own the plot bunnies that infect our brain and use them to raise money for charity. Therefore, no money in our bank from these.**

**K: Woot! We got a chapter out on time LOL And just so you know, the reference in the last A/N was from the Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins. Blame me for it, I just finished the book :P**

**Robs: the only person to get the reference was the fab xxcaityxx!**

**special thanks to Amber... who even though we distract her, still manages to help us out. ;)

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APOV

The day Jasper left I got up early to see him off, we'd had an interesting night, that was for sure. I'd always known that Kelly was trying to be a new version of me, but I never really understood why, and now that I knew, I kind of felt bad for her. I knew what it was like to be in love with someone who was unattainable like Jasper, 'cause I had been there before. But at the same time, at least I felt really desired, maybe loved even because Jasper had really tried to get over me. He moved away trying to get me out of his head, the same thing I was trying to do, and he was just as unsuccessful as I was.

Even though it was probably the wrong thing to do, because he hadn't broken up with Kelly and I was supposed to be getting over Garrett, we made love. It was tender and warm and caring and just so many other things, it was all too much for me to process just yet.

I knew Jasper wanted to work things out with me, he wanted to try again with me, he still loved me. Do I let Jasper Whitlock, breaker of hearts and minds back into my life in that way? I looked around my room, the rumpled sheets and the smell of sex unmistakable. I guess I already had, without really realizing or acknowledging it, but I was in control this time. _Wasn't I? _

I mean, it's not my fault that I couldn't control how my body reacted to him, but I could control how much power he had over me, right? I sighed and took another drink from my coffee. I still loved Jasper very much, and not having him in my life would hurt, a lot. Honestly, if Kelly somehow managed to get him to stay I would end up so brokenhearted I didn't exactly know what I would do.

It had been a few hours since I dropped him off at the airport and already a feeling of sadness and loneliness was beginning to set in. I put my cup in the sink and began cleaning my coffee pot when I heard my phone beep to let me know I received a text message.

I picked it up off the charging station and looked at the screen. It was from Jasper, I pressed the button to read it. _Can I just turn around and forget my stuff in TN?_

I smiled and pressed reply.

_You'd break Em's heart if you didn't get all those comic books._

_Right, Comics. We just landed by the way. _

I chuckled; _glad you got there ok, do you miss me?_

_Yes, the sooner I do this, the sooner I get back right?_

That made my heart flutter. _Yeah, definitely. I miss you... and can still smell you._

_I miss you too and I hope I smell good! I have to get a cab. Call you later?_

_Sure._ I kissed the screen on my phone then added_; I sent you a kiss too._

_I expect more when I get back! Love you Ali Cat._

_Love you 2._ I smiled as I closed my phone. He didn't have to text, but he did. I chewed my lip as I considered what that could mean. Was he more serious this time? Would he freak out again if things got too serious?

I decided not to dwell on it too much and after calling Bella and Rosalie and telling them that we needed some girl time, I got ready for the day.

_Mani's-pedi's__ and shopping, who could ask for more? _

~*~oOo~*~

A few hours of walking around the Northgate Mall and we were beat. We found a nice little Greek food place to have lunch before our mani-pedis and everything was going well until Rosalie decided we should talk about more important things than Jimmy Choo and Dolche.

"Jazz gave you back the casserole dish, right?"

"Um..." _had he?_ I thought about it for a moment. "Oh yeah, he did, I found it in the foyer after..." I stopped myself from saying anything else. I really didn't want to remember the shit Garrett said, or reveal how deep I was in with Jasper.

"After... what? You fucked him against another wall?" she joked.

I blanched, I hadn't told anyone about that, I glanced over at Bella who was reading the wine menu. "No, when Garrett and I broke up... and he told me he'd been doin' his assistant for three months because I was icy." I swallowed hard.

Bella gasped as Rose rolled her eyes. "No, you're not. He was a sleaze ball anyway Ali... good riddance." Rose said with a shake of her head.

"Yeah..." I took a drink of my tea and studied Rosalie for a moment. "Who told you about the wall incident?" _Incident, like it was a crime. Oh geez, Nerdy Boy rubbed off on me... in so many ways... God! Why am I such a perv?_

She laughed. "Who do you think?"

"Emmett? Of course, Nerdy Boy still tells him everything huh?" I sighed. "So what else did he tell Em?"

She shrugged. "You know the usual. He fucked up, doesn't know how to fix things. Still get's a hard on looking at your legs..."

Bella snorted at the last part. "So almost everything he tells Ed?" Rose nodded in response.

"Wait... what?" I asked, looking at Bella confused.

"I knew about him coming to Ed and asking what to do. Especially after your surprise engagement dinner. The legs thing," she shook her head and laughed, "he didn't tell Ed about that."

"Yeah, I would think not... Ed punched him once when were kids for looking at me in a bikini." I giggled a little, "So he really asked for their help to fix things?"

"Ed also tried to drown him," Rose added. "Yeah, he really did. Believe it or not Ali he still loves you."

"I know, he told me he still loves me..." I took a bite of my gyro. "But I mean who's to say that he won't do the same thing as before... when shit gets intense he bails. Or at least that's the way it's always seemed to me."

Rose shrugged and picked at her salad.

"What if things are different now? Like, I remember he always seemed a little off. Emmett told me that Jasper was always afraid of the dark, afraid that it was because his parents loved him that they died..." Bella sighed. "What if he's finally realized there's nothing to be afraid of?"

I thought about it; he _was _a little unusual... but it didn't matter, he had always been my Jasper, so I never put too much thought into it. "Maybe... I hope so," I sighed. "Does it sound stupid that I still want my fairytale happily ever after with him?"

"No," both Rose and Bella answered.

"If anyone deserves it I think you do," Rose said with a small smile.

"Thanks," I smiled back. "I keep thinkin' that maybe I should've stayed broken up with Garrett, you know?"

"Why's that?" Bella asked.

"Cause I wouldn't have had to go through all this, you know? I mean when Jasper sent me the letter..."

"I think this is just what you two needed. It gave my brother a good kick in the pants that's for sure."

"Wait, what letter?" Bella asked, ignoring Rose completely.

***~*~* February 14th 2008 *~*~***

It was my twenty-first birthday, and I was only kind of looking forward to going out that night. Bella, Ang, Rosie and the guys were determined to take me out and get me drunk for my birthday. I didn't really want to go either, not since Nerdy Boy left. I mean, he was the one who always seemed to make my birthdays special for me.

But I had a new boyfriend, Garrett, who was really sweet, and he was planning on going to this shin dig too so I figured why not? I had just moved into my gorgeous condo and was really proud of the fact I was buying something, and well, I guess I had lots to celebrate.

I went downstairs to check the mail, hoping for some birthday cards with cash. Childish yes, but it's still fun to get some spending money for simply being born. I turned the key and opened my mail cube to see a small package and a few cards waiting. I took them back upstairs before I looked to see who they were from.

Once I got upstairs I decided to open the package first. I picked it out of the pile and looked at the return address; _who the fuck would send me something from Tennessee?_

_It couldn't be!_ I ripped the small box open to find a Polaroid picture confirming my suspicions; it was a photo of me and Nerdy Boy, cuddling, and from the date on the picture it was from two-thousand-and-two. The watch he got me was very cool; Ed Hardy, huh... looks like Nerdy Boy finally picked up a little fashion sense. I smiled at the watch and put it to the side before I picked up the letter, I was nervous, I had no idea what he would say to me after all this time.

_Ali cat,_

_Wow, it's been a while since I used that nickname. I hope you don't mind. _

_Okay, I was going to do the traditional thing, ask you how you are and how's life treating you, as if I'd expect you to write me back, but__ I figured that you would appreciate the true me instead, and I doubt I deserve a letter back... So here goes._

_I'm in Tennessee, a fact I'm sure you already know thanks to anyone in the gang. I have a nice little two bedroom apartment__ with a lot of room__ and unfortunately, not enough comic books to fill it. And it's missing the famous Alice and Esme decorating style. Even though it's been home for a little over three years now, it just doesn't feel like it, you know?_

_I saw that you graduated from UCLA__ - __congratulations! And early at that! See and you said you weren't smart. Edward sent me some pictures from the graduation ceremony and the dinner you guys had. You looked beautiful as always. I'm proud of you Ali. _

_I finished my degree at The University of Tennessee. I was able to graduate on time, thank goodness! I don't think I could have dealt with another semester in a strange school. The Monday after I graduated, I joined the Knoxville police academy. Man! I thought Emmett's weight training sessions were hard! That was nothing compared to the physical part of the academy._

_But come November 20__th__, I was an academy graduate and hired to work in the forensics department on my twenty-second birthday._

_Speaking of birthdays, thank you so much for the pocket watch Ali! I loved it. I know you're probably wondering how I knew it was from you since the only thing to trace it back was the Washington post office mark. But the moment I opened it and saw the wheels and gears inside the watch, I knew it was from you._

_I have to tell you, __that watch saved me a few times during school and the academy._

_I miss you Alice, more then you could ever imagine. I know it doesn't seem like it. After all, I was a moron and left, but I needed to let you blossom onto your own. And from what I hear from Ed and Emmett, you've become a truly amazing woman. I always knew you would be._

_Oh, remember how you used to try to get me to talk to your dad about my sleeping problems, and how you used to tease me about being OCD? Well, turns out you were right – part of my being accepted into the academy was having to go through a mental health evaluation, and they found that I do have a mild form of OCD. I'm also now seeing a therapist to help me work through my past. __Well, because of that I'm now seeing a therapist to help me deal with my past.  
_

_Apparently the nightmares are triggers. "The subconscious' way of restoring balance __and __order", or at least that's what the department shrink says. He's given me medication to help me sleep, but I only use it on my days off. I prefer not to be at work in a drug induced haze._

_This is so weird. There's so much I want to say to you Alice, but I don't know how. Hell, I don't even know if you're going to read this, and if you do, if you're going to make it this far down the page._

_Remember our old box? I still have it. I'm surprised the thing can stay together with all the times I've looked through the pictures. But there's more then pictures in there now. There's ticket stubs (Remember when you made me see Napoleon Dynamite with you?), even the peeled off label from your first beer. _

_At the risk of sounding girly, it calms me. Because of the contents of the box, I feel like I still have a place in your life. Like I still have my best friend._

_So I hope you like your gift. The designer is Ed Hardy. I don't know but it seemed like a very Ali Cat piece to me. And the picture enclosed is one I thought you'd enjoy. Summers at first beach were always worth the bonfires if you ask me._

_I hope things are well for you. And I hope we see each other soon._

_Take care Ali Cat,_

_Your Nerdy-Boy_

I reread the note at least a dozen times, it made me hopeful, depressed, nostalgic and sad all at the same time. _Why had he written this? __Why had he made it seem like I was the one who cut him out and not the other way around? Why didn't he mention anything about the baby picture of Ryan I'd sent him? _

I had so many questions and no way to get any answers.

I called Rosalie, there was no way I was going out after this. It rang a few times and she answered sounding breathless. "Hey Rosie?"

"Hey Ali, what's up?" she asked cheerfully.

"Um... I can't go out tonight," my voice cracked.

"What? Why? What's wrong?" she asked, slightly panicked.

"I got a letter from Jasper..." My voice was barely a whisper at this point. I was so close to completely breaking down.

"Whoa," she breathed. "Do you need me to come over? 'Cause I will."

"Yeah... please? I don't wanna be alone right now..."

"I'll be right there. Wanna talk to Em until I get there?" She asked and I could hear the sound of her grabbing her keys.

"No... I need to call Rhett... see you soon..." I said before I began sobbing.

"Alright, I'm on my way babe." I hung up and managed to gather enough courage to break it off with Garrett via text message. It's cold to do it that way, and definitely the pussy way to do things, but I couldn't talk and he deserved someone better than me, someone who was over their ex.

*~*oOo*~*

After my day with Rosie and Bella I went home exhausted and thrilled all at the same time. It felt good to talk about what was going on with my girls and we had fun shopping, well I had more fun than anyone else, and getting my nails done always worked to cheer me up a bit.

I hung up my all new clothes before getting dinner started. _Dinner for one,_ I sighed, _well, maybe soon it could be dinner for two._

I heard my phone begin ringing _'Hanging by a Moment_,' and rushed to grab my phone. "Hey N.B.!" I chirped.

"Hi Ali... sorry I got you on speaker right now, just until I get the damn porcelain cleaned up." He sighed.

"Why? What happened?" Jasper wasn't normally a clumsy person.

"Well, I'm single again... and Nana's teapot is destroyed... Seriously she had to go for that? She couldn't go for the expensive computer... fucking bitch."

"I take it she didn't take it well?" I sighed a little at his discomfort, wishing I could be there to cheer him up.

He chuckled. "Nope... actually no, she was okay with it until she saw the boxes with Forks printed on the mailing label. Then all hell broke loose."

"Why?" I was confused.

"I told her I was transferred..." he stopped for a minute as he banged something in the background. "Then she saw the boxes with the comics and asked if I was doing this for you."

"And?"

"I told her the truth. Yes and no. Yes, I'm going back because you're willing to give us another chance. And no, that wasn't the only reason. I told her that it made sense to be back in Washington. My family and friends are there. I have no one here," he chuckled darkly. "I'll give you two guess but you'll only need one to figure out how she took the last part."

"Really bad... So you told her? About us I mean."

"Yeah. I wasn't gonna lie to her Ali," he said softly with a sigh.

"What did she say?" I asked as I sat down.

"Does it matter?" he asked.

"You gonna start keepin' things from me again?" I knew that was low, but I really wanted open, honest communication between us this time.

"No," his voice was closer now. "No. She was just saying shit that wasn't true. Said you were lying to me so you could get what you wanted. Stuff like that."

"Lying about what?" I asked with a laugh.

He sighed. "About how you felt."

"And what, in her opinion, is what I wanted?" I asked, arching my eyebrow. I seriously needed to get on a plane to cut a bitch.

He laughed. "Her unhappy, since you were jealous of what she had with me. I told her she was the one jealous of what you and I had but she told me I was blind to your ways."

I snorted, "Yeah, and that's why _I_ was out bleaching my hair and using spray on tan right?" I rolled my eyes. "Please tell me you told her to shove it up her ass and leave?"

He laughed. "She's gone, if that's what you wanted to know. I had to call a guy from work to come get her, but she's gone."

"Whoa, you had to call someone to force her to leave?" _Girl really is a psycho! _

"It's not as bad as it sounds Ali... It was more so I didn't hurt her. She was going for mom's things..."

"What gives her the right to do that to you?" I felt outraged.

"Because she couldn't touch our stuff, I left our box at Bella's," he sighed again. "I don't know. All I know is I'm getting the fuck out of here as soon as possible."

"I don't blame you... is there anything I can do to make you feel better?"

He laughed a little. "Not unless you could just show up like now?"

"I wish... I miss you _so_ much... and I am still walkin' funny," I said with a giggle.

"Damn girl... and to think I didn't even fuck you the way I used to," he teased. "I miss you too Ali."

"Oh God," I didn't mean to moan that. "The way you used to fuck me... I still touch myself when I think about it," I teased right back.

"You gonna show me that when I get back right?" His voice deepened when he asked that.

"If you want me to," I bit my lip to restrain the girly giggle.

"Fuck yes I want you to," he groaned. "Damn it Ali I have to pack not jerk off."

I let the giggle out, "Aww Nerdy Boy... I'm sorry. I'll stop, I can't wait 'til you come back and show that you really can make me walk funny."

He laughed. "Yes, I'll show you alright. Baby, I gotta go finish packing up," he said sadly.

"Call me when you take rest stops and stuff?" I asked hopeful.

"Of course. Get some sleep Ali Cat, one of us has to."

"I'll be thinkin' of you... Will you be okay?" I asked, worried about him not sleeping on his way home.

"Yeah, I'll be fine Ali. I'm gonna take my meds don't worry. I love you."

My heart skipped, I swear it did. "I love you... Be safe."

"Of course. Night Ali."

"Night," I said before closing my phone and hugging it to my chest. Maybe things really would change for the better this time.

* * *

End note: Reviews are good for the soul! Kinda like chicken soup, but less fattening and PETA friendly!


	25. Chapter 25

**DISCLAIMER:  
We are not nor have we ever claimed to be Stephanie Meyer. All Twilight Characters belong to her, she makes the money off of the movies/book/music/shirts ect. We own the plot bunnies that infect our brain and use them to raise money for charity. Therefore, no money in our bank from these.**

**K: Jsyk, Kelly is loosely based on a real person, that's why you all hate her so much, cause I hate the true inspiration behind her lol. Also we might have a surprise for you this month… js**

**Robs: wow a lot of you requested just this ... now you'll get to see it ;) enjoy!**

**Special thanks to miss Amber for all her help we love yah chicka

* * *

**

Jpov

Kelly's blue eyes got wide as she looked at me. "Talk?" she asked.

"Yeah, things have changed."

"I can see that Jasper. Why are you getting rid of your comics?"

I sighed and shook my head. "I'm not getting rid of them. I'm sending them to a friend so he can take care of them until I get a place."

"You've got a place Jasper, you're in it right now."

"I'm moving."

Her jaw went slack and she gawked at me. "But what about the department? You always said you wouldn't leave the department."

"I was offered a transfer to a new department. Let's face it Kel, the only thing keeping me here was the job."

"Your job? That's it?"

_Bad choice of words..._ "Yeah. Kelly, we're not in love with each other-" I quickly halted my words when I saw her hand cover her mouth.

She took a moment before speaking, her eyes showed the sadness and hurt. "You're leaving me?" she whispered.

I looked down at the box in my hands and started to fold it closed, ready to tape it shut. "Yeah... I'm sorry."

She sighed. "No, I get it. I knew I never really had you to begin with. I just wish..."

I looked up at her and watched as her face changed from sadness to anger. _Oh shit…_ "Just wish what?" I asked hoping to find out why she was suddenly angry.

"Forks, Washington?"

"Yeah, that's where I'm transferring to," I told her.

"You're doing this for _her_ aren't you?" She balled up her fists angrily.

"If by _her_ you mean Alice… then, yes and no." I got up and headed to the kitchen for something to drink.

"What the fuck?" she bellowed as she stomped after me. "I thought you weren't good enough for her?"

"I'm not!" I shouted back. "We're gonna try being friends again," I said a bit calmer. "Emmett's dad pulled some strings to get me to stay. That's why I'm going. Better pay and my family are there."

"And her," Her tone clearly a mix of hurt and angry. "Did you...fuck her?" she asked quietly.

I sighed and put my palms on the counter. "Yeah, I did," I admitted. _Better to tell her the truth, _I reminded myself.

I looked over to see if she was still in the kitchen just as she pulled her hand back and it collided with my face. "You fucking bastard!" she screamed, slapping me again. "You fucked that... that whore? How could you do this to me?"

"Goddamn it Kelly!" I shouted grabbing her wrist to keep her from hitting me again. "She's not a fucking whore."

"Oh please, I've seen the fucking videos _Nerdy Boy,"_ she seethed.

"Don't call me that Kelly," I dropped her hand. "Why the fuck are you going through my stuff?"

"Because I'm your _girlfriend_ and I can," she said indignantly. "I can't believe you fucked her... and you're fucking leaving _me_ for _her_! She has got to have some serious issues to take you back."

"A locked foot locker generally means stay out of it." I just rolled my eyes at her. "Think what you want _Kel,_ but you're the one with the fucking issues," I spat and pushed passed her to get out of the kitchen.

"You can't leave me!" she screamed just as I felt air whoosh past my right ear and heard something shatter against the wall, I spun and saw her picking up some of my grandmother's china to throw. "I dyed my hair for you. I offered to let you tie me up..." I could see the angry tears forming at the corners of her eyes as she threw a teacup.

"I never asked you to do any of that Kelly!" I dodged out of the way of the passing cup. "Stop taking it out on my Nana's stuff!" I shouted at her as the matching plate came flying at me. "Damn it Kelly, did you ever stop to think that maybe I wanted you 'cause you were who you were!"

"But it was never good enough was it?" she asked with a small sob, before kicking the island cabinet.

"Kel..." I sighed. I shook my head. "I don't know what you want me to say. I tried."

"No you didn't," her bottom lip wobbled. "I love you Jasper... why can't you love me? Why can't you forget about her and just love me?"

"I can't Kelly... I'm sorry." I whispered the last part.

She gave an enraged roar and began chucking things at my head again, bits of porcelain, glass and china flying all around me.

_Jesus Christ! _ I thought as I grabbed her and pulled her out of the kitchen. "Stop it!"

"Fuck you," she screamed kicking my calf as hard as she could.

"God damn it!" I limped out of the way. "What the fuck Kelly?"

"I hate you! I hate you and your fucking small dick and your stupid stuff and your freaky fetishes!" she screamed, taking some pictures off the walls and throwing them at me as I jumped out of the way.

"Whatever Kelly," I muttered reaching into my pocket for my phone. I needed her out of here if I wanted to keep my stuff in one piece.

"You limp dicked bastard," she screamed as she threw a vase at me.

_Fuck, that was my mother's_, I thought as I sent a text to her partner at work to come get her. "Knock it off Kelly," I warned heading to the closet where the cuffs were. _Shit, I might have to use her_ _own damn stun gun on her_.

"What are you gonna do freak? You're too fucking weak to do anything."

I got to the closet and grabbed the cuffs. "I don't get it Kel, why are you talking shit? I never once called you a bad name."

"You've treated me bad this entire time, and I fucking let you cause I thought that maybe," she shook her head. "You just don't have a fucking heart."

"Over two years Kelly? If I was as bad as you say, why the fuck did you stay with me for over two years? And I do have a heart Kel, it just never came to Tennessee with me."

"Because I fucking loved you, and I thought you loved me but just didn't know how to show it..." she clenched her fists again. "That's right it died when your momma did."

I opened my mouth to say something to her just as there was a pounding at the door. "My sister was right, you're a fucking crazy whore," I seethed pulling the door open roughly.

**~*~*~ December 20th, 2008 ~*~*~**

I unlocked the door and held it open. "Well, this is home..." I looked at my sister and her new husband nervously. "It's not much," I shrugged.

Rose shook her head and walked past me, followed closely by Emmett. "It's fine Jazz. I'm just happy I get to actually spend a Christmas with you."

_Way to lay on the guilt Rose._ I closed the door. "I know Rose. I'm really glad y'all are here."

Emmett looked around, "It doesn't look too bad."

"See," Rose said definitely directing the comment to Em before turning to me. "Bathroom? Long flight," she laughed.

I pointed her in the direction to go. "Can't miss it, it's the only door open," I laughed and looked at Em. "Beer?"

"Sure," he said with a smile, settling down into the couch.

I nodded and headed towards the kitchen. This should be an interesting week considering Emmett hadn't been speaking to me since I left home.

I grabbed two beers before getting the wine out. Odds are my sister would like a glass. "So... how are things?" I asked as I got Rose's glass ready.

"Good, I'm a motorcycle cop for Seattle now," he informed me.

"I heard, congrats man," I handed him his beer.

"Thanks," he took the beer and cracked it open before taking a long pull. "So what about you, what have you been doin' down south?"

I shrugged and opened my own bottle. "Not much… spending my days locked up in a lab doing the forensics thing."

"And fucking some girl," Rose said from behind Em.

"She's my girlfriend Rose." I defended lightly.

"Uh huh," she said taking her glass from the counter. "Thank you."

"So... I'm guessin' you ain't planning on coming back then, huh?" Emmett asked with a slightly sad expression.

Rose gave me an amused look as I sighed. "I don't know man... I'd probably do more harm than good."

"Right," Rose said sarcastically.

"Rosie," Emmett leaned his head back to look at her before looking at me. "So... tell me about your new girl?" Rose rolled her eyes and muttered something about needing to call the girls.

"What do you want to know?"

"What's she like?" Emmett waggled his eyebrows at me.

_Nothing like Ali... _"Blonde and beautiful?" I laughed. "I dunno man. She's different."

"Sounds different than your type," he smiled and took another drink. "So what is it about her you like?"

I leaned against the counter and thought it over. "Can I be honest with ya and you won't pound my head in?"

"I ain't here to pound your head in," he reassured with a small smile.

I set my beer down and scrubbed my face over my hands. "The best thing about Kelly is she ain't Ali. Kelly is tall, blonde, can't dance worth shit. Her voice is a bit on the whiney side and her laugh can grate on your nerves. And I like it."

Emmett gaped at me, "So you like her 'cause she ain't Ali-baby?"

"Yeah..." I said softly. "Pretty shitty huh?"

"Can I ask you somethin' without you getting all pissed off?" Em asked, looking at me sideways. I nodded in response. "And have you give me a honest answer?" He added as I looked up to see Rose leaning against the wall watching us. "What did Ali-baby ever do to you?"

"Nothing," I shook my head before taking a long pull of my beer. "What happened between me and her, that was all me. All she ever did was love me."

"And you loved her," Rose said sadly. I nodded in response.

"She..." Emmett paused, he and Rosie exchanged a look. "She's doin' good in school."

"Yeah... and happy with that Gavin guy..." _Damn it hurt to know she moved on._

"Garrett," Rose corrected.

"Whatever," I muttered.

"You know she broke up with him for about a week around her birthday... I fucking hate the douchebag." Emmett said before he took another drink from his bottle.

"She did? Edward didn't tell me that." I looked at him confused. "And why do you hate him?"

"Probably didn't tell you cause you don't call often enough," Rose said giving me a pointed look.

"Yeah, she did... I dunno why though. And I hate him because he thinks he's so much fucking better than everyone else, fucking walking around in his Armani suits and driving his fucking Mercedes... the way he talks to Ali-baby you'd think his shit don't stink."

"Oh...So he's got money huh?" _Never thought she'd go for that..._

Rose snorted. "No, just a small pecker." _Clearly Rose isn't his biggest fan._

Emmett shrugged, "Who gives a fuck, frankly I'm disappointed that she went with the first dick who gave her attention since-" Rosie shushed him.

"Since? Me?" I offered to fill in the blanks before tossing my empty bottle in the recycle bin. "So let me get this straight. You, Rose, don't like him 'cause he's got a small dick. And Em, you don't like him 'cause he acts like he's God's gift to the world? Hate to think what y'all thought of me."

"You don't have to be a bitter asshole to us Jasper Alexander. We never told you to leave." Rose snapped.

"I'm not being bitter. It just seems like y'all don't like him 'cause he's an outsider. The only outsider I've ever seen y'all take in, no questions asked was Bella, but hell she's family."

"We took you in didn't we?" Emmett asked.

"Did you really have a choice?" I countered.

"Yeah, we did. We could've been horrible little shits to you, but you were cool, you didn't talk to Ali-baby like she was a piece of shit even when you were tappin' it." Emmett defended.

"What?" I asked but was cut off by Rose's scoff.

Rose rolled her eyes. "Now I see why you shouldn't drink. You're a dick sometimes."

"How am I being a dick? It's just a simple fucking question." I looked at my sister who rolled her eyes at me again as she leaned against her husband. "Whatever, now what do you mean he's talking to her like shit?" I looked at Emmett.

"Just the shit he says to her..." Emmett shook his head. "He's not good enough and he fucking knows it, so he's trying to bring her down or some psychological mumbo-jumbo."

I raised my eyebrow at that. "And Ed hasn't killed him yet?"

"She won't let him. She ignores the shit we say cause 'she's happy'," Emmett said the last part with finger quotes.

I sighed and shrugged. "As long as she's happy, right?"

"Right," Emmett agreed, picking at the label on his beer probably realizing it was a lost cause.

"I'm sorry man," I sighed.

"So, are we getting the tree tomorrow?" Rose asked, clearly changing the subject.

We got a tree and decorated it and as usual, Emmett ate the popcorn Rose had intended to use to make as garland. Really I didn't see the point of the popcorn garland, especially when Emmett ate most of the supplies, yet Rose insisted on the tradition. But somehow we managed to not kill each other. I was grateful that Rose brought Emmett with her. I missed him and honestly, he kept Rose's snark at minimum and attitude in check.

Kelly came over a few times. She was anxious to meet Rose and I knew there was no way to avoid it. Emmett was kind to her, cracking jokes and just being Em, while Rose... well she was being Rose.

It was Christmas Eve and Rose wanted us to have the Christmas dinner tonight. She tired to justify it as being a new tradition for us, truth be told I just think she didn't want to cook after she got her gifts. Almost as if she was expecting something big.

"So will trailer trash be here?" Rose asked as she pulled the ham from the oven.

"Rosie," Emmett said in a warning tone.

"Yes, Rose, Kelly is going to be here. She doesn't have family and since she is my girlfriend, I included her." I explained.

"Fine, I'll be nice. But don't expect me to like her, 'cause I don't."

"I know. And I'm okay with the fact that you'll never like anyone I date from here on out 'cause of one simple reason."

"Oh yeah? Why's that smart ass?" She asked.

"'Cause it ain't Alice," Emmett and I both said together before laughing.

"Oh shut up. And you feel the same Em don't deny it!" She laughed.

"Yeah, it's true... you two belong together... " Em said with a small smile.

I rolled my eyes and started to set the table. "I tell you what. If there is _ever_ a chance for that again, I'll be on the first flight home. Just don't hold your breath, okay?"

"Sure dude, you know I'd much rather you for a brother-in-law... in law," he smiled a bit. "Then that piece of trash."

I laughed and nodded just as the door opened. "Hey Kel, we're in the kitchen!" I called out.

I heard the sound of high heels against the hardwood floor, a sound I now recognized thanks to my sister's habit of wearing them around the house, before hearing Rose gasp and Emmett mutter something under his breath. I turned to see why they both look so shocked only to be faced with someone who looked like Kelly... only not.

"Kel?" I asked.

She smiled in response. "You like it Jasper?" she asked as her hand went to mess with her short and now black hair. I just gaped at her in response. "I thought it would be a good Christmas gift. Makes me look sexy, doesn't it?"

I could see Emmett cover his mouth with his hand as Rose excused herself from the room.

"Kel... what did you do?" I asked, finally taking in the rest of her appearance. Not only had she cut and dyed her hair like Alice's used to be, but she had also tried to copy the way she used to dress – in high school.

"I got a makeover," she smiled brightly but fell slightly as she studied my face. "You don't like it?"

_God no I don't._ "It's just... different." I lied with a shrug.

She looked over at Emmett before coming over to me and wrapping her arms around my waist. "I figured if I could be a little more like her…" she said softly.

"Jesus Kelly," I sighed. She chewed her lip and excused herself just as Rose returned. I heard the bedroom door close and I waited for the inevitable shit to hit the fan or whatever was coming my way from Emmett and Rosalie.

"Well, I guess she ain't that much different than Ali-baby now," Emmett said, not so subtly stifling a laugh.

"Wow... what the hell Jazz? Won't fuck her or something?" Rose asked, not even bothering to hide her giggles.

"Oh my God," I breathed just staring at the direction of my bedroom door.

"I don't know whether to call her a whore for being the white trash version of my best friend or just call her crazy," Rose said shaking her head. "Oh I know!" She clapped happily. "Crazy whore!" She chirped then laughed mischievously. "I can't wait to tell the girls."

I just shook my head. _What have I gotten myself into_?

* * *

endnote: reviews fix broken teapots... okay not really but they make us smile :)


	26. Chapter 26

**DISCLAIMER:**  
We are not nor have we ever claimed to be Stephanie Meyer. All Twilight Characters belong to her, she makes the money off of the movies/book/music/shirts ect. We own the plot bunnies that infect our brain and use them to raise money for charity. Therefore no money in our bank from these.

K: So lots of things happening. Sorry we were unable to surprise you all on Spirit Day, unfortunately Jasper and Peter were a bit shy and not ready to come out yet. *sighs* But in other (causes we support) news: Alsper officially has an entry in the Fandom for Preemies book. I suggest y'all go to http: / / fandomforpreemies. blogspot. com/ (take out the spaces) to learn more about the project, see teasers from other authors and find out how you can get your hands on a book with an exclusive OMS outtake. Remember that March of Dimes/Fandom for Preemies is something very near and dear to both Robs and Mommylice's heart. So give it a look, and help out if you can!

Robs: Sorry this is late, life sometimes happens. As y'all might know our beta is sick and she finds out some results on Monday, so do us a favor and keep her in your thoughts please?

Special thanks to our amazing beta Amber. We love yah.

* * *

APOV:

I hated waiting, it was one of those things I was never really good at. Not that I'm impatient, no, just waiting and not doing anything seems very unproductive to me, and I am a very productive person. Or at least I'd like to think I am. I am also one of those 'take charge' kind of people, and waiting around to see if you're ex boyfriend/bestfriend/love-of-your-life to show back up is not really a 'take charge' kind of move.

_At least he called me, that's a good thing, right? That means the trashy whore didn't dig her claws into him again and force him to stay somehow._

All the what ifs kept playing in my head and it was slowly making me nauseous. I needed to think of something else... Do something else. So I decided to make a call to someone I hadn't spoken to since Jasper came back into my life like the tornado that he is; Carmen.

~*~oOo~*~

After I got off the phone with Carmen I felt a little better, she suggested that I should just clean up my apartment and purge some items a bit and she also said that I could visit them in New York if I wanted to. I told her I'd think about it and got off the phone. Maybe it was time to purge my closet and my home of useless things, donate some to Goodwill or just toss things I no longer had any use for.

I put a handkerchief on my head and my grubbiest clothes on before I got started. About halfway through the day I decided I was in need of a cucumber sandwich and some tea, bad. I began making everything when there was a knock at the door.

_Who the fuck could that be?_ I wondered as I padded over to the door, unlocking it and opening it expecting to see a salesperson.

"Surprise," N.B. said with a smile.

"Oh my God! I wasn't expecting to see you so soon!" I squealed happily, wrapping my arms around him tightly.

He laughed and put his arms around me. "That's generally why they call it a surprise Ali Cat." He pulled away slightly. "Got you these as well," he said, holding up a bouquet of flowers.

They were a beautiful arrangement of yellow and purple irises and roses. "They're beautiful Nerdy Boy!" I took them from him and ushered him inside as I made my way to the kitchen to put them in a vase. "Sorry about the mess, I wasn't expecting anyone."

He laughed. "That's quite alright, I figured I'd come see you first since it was on the way to the apartment, before I went home to pass out."

"You can sleep here if you want..." I chewed my lip and hoped he would take me up on my offer. I could cook dinner for him, just like the old days.

He smiled a lazy smile at me. "I don't want to impose."

"Please, it would make me feel a lot better to know you aren't killing yourself driving to Bella's old apartment." I batted my lashes at him, "Please?"

He nodded, "Alright, but I don't put what ever you were doing on hold for me okay?"

I smiled and shook my head, "I'm just cleaning, don't I look hot?" I asked, laughing as I twirled for him, showing off my look.

"I always think you're hot Ali Cat," he said sincerely.

"Really?" I asked, giving him a funny look.

"Yeah," he gave me a lopsided grin again, "Even when you think you're at your worst."

I tilted my head and felt the corner of my mouth turn up into a smile, "You're hotter."

He shook his head. "Nope, you win that contest."

I rolled my eyes, "Do you need lunch before you pass out?"

He shook his head, "No thank you."

"Okay," I gestured towards the bedroom. "Go on then."

He came over and kissed my cheek. "Thanks Ali..."

I kissed his cheek in response. "Sweet dreams."

I watched his back as he walked rather stiffly towards my bedroom, to sleep in my bed. Why is it that still makes me feel a bit like a little kid when I think about him between my sheets? It makes me wanna jump up and down and squeal with excitement. He pulled his shirt up over his head and I felt that heat in my stomach as I watched the way his muscles rippled.

_My. God._

I shook my head so I would stop thinking about following that fine ass into bed and letting him _really _tucker himself out. _Cleaning, cleaning, that's right I must clean._

~*~oOo~*~

Six hours and lots of junk later I was sitting and wondering if I should wake Jasper up from his nap. Was six hours enough? Would he be grumpy with me for waking him? Would he want to eat dinner?

I finally decided that he would probably enjoy a good meal and before going in to wake him I changed into a nice dress and brushed my hair. I walked into my bedroom and watched him sleep for a moment, he looked so harmless and peaceful sleeping like that.

First I tried to wake him by simply shaking his arm, but ended up having to climb on top of him to shake him by the shoulders. "N.B. get up..."

He smiled and shook his head. "No, I'm comfy," he pouted, his voice raspy from sleep.

"Don't you want something to eat?" I asked, tilting my head to look at him.

His lip twitched as he tried to fight a smirk. "Depends..."

"On?"

"What's on the menu," he said as his hands ghosted along my thighs.

"Anything you want," I smiled at him.

"Anything?" he asked. I nodded quickly, wondering what he wanted to eat.

He quickly moved us so I was pinned under him. "Does that include... you?"

My eyes widened when I realized what he wanted to eat and I let out a surprised giggle. "If you want.. but did you break it off with Kelly?"

"Yes I did," he said as he moved up to kiss and nip at my neck.

"Mmm... then you can have me if you'd like," I purred, letting him take me.

He hummed against my neck. "I like."

~*~oOo~*~

The next morning was a Saturday and I was so grateful I didn't have to work. Jasper kept me up all night, and while I wasn't complaining, it made for an interesting morning. I put a pot of coffee on after I climbed out of the shower and went to get the newspaper from the door. By the time I made it back to the kitchen I saw a half-naked Jasper, apparently making something for breakfast.

"What'cha making?" I asked as I sat myself at the counter.

"Omelets," he smiled. "You still like 'em with tomatoes and extra cheese?"

"Yes I do," I smiled at the way his muscles flexed as he mixed.

"Good. Got any plans today?" I shook my head in response. "Wanna have lunch with me, and Peter and Char?"

"Sure..." I said with a small smile. I loved Peter and Charlotte, I actually maintained my friendship with them over the years, which was pretty funny considering how we met.

*~*~* January 1st, 2005 *~*~*

I smiled as I sipped the green sludgy cocktail they were serving. I couldn't wait til I got into college, they had parties for just about everything. Last night Jasper took me to new years party, and he took me to this one tonight celebrating the fact that we didn't get alcohol poisoning and die last night.

New Years had been great; Jasper, ever the strong protective boyfriend, watched over me for most of the night, dancing with me in a way that only people who were intimate could dance. Eventually, as with all the parties Jasper takes me to, we ended up grinding and making out, which led to other things once he took me back to his room.

My entire body tingled when I thought about what he did to me last night. My knees ached and my ass was sore, but it was completely fucking worth it.

I was shaking my hips lightly to the beat of the music that was playing and turned to look for my man so I could ask him to dance with me and maybe we could have repeat of the night before. I'd even wear the little plaid skirt he liked so much if he wanted me to.

I finally found him on the opposite side of the very large room, talking to some petite blonde wearing the skimpist pink top known to man and the tiniest little school-girl skirt. I could feel my heart thudding against my ribcage as I watched her lean closer to him and him begin to laugh. The bubble of anger, grief and jealousy popped and spilling it's icky green contents all over me.

_Fuck this._

I downed my drink and walked over to the guy who was acting as the bartender and ordered up a few shots. They say you can drown your sorrows... but can they drown the fact that you'll always be second best to the guy you love?

~*~oOo~*~

A little while later my entire body felt loose and I felt good... really good. I was getting lots of attention, cat-calls and ass smacks as I table danced to 'Yeah' on an end table. Someone handed me another drink, which I downed in one gulp before I started shaking my ass again, making the table wiggle precariously under my weight.

"Ali Cat, what are you doing?" Jasper asked from my side, holding his hands up as if to catch me.

"Dancin'," I chirped, rolling my hips and reaching my hands above my head.

"You're gonna end up with a concussion," he gave me a pointed look.

"What do you care? Go back and talk to your new girlfriend." I tried to glare at him, but wasn't entirely sure I could scrunch up my face in the right manner with how loose and tingly my face felt.

"I only got one girl and she's about to fall flat on her ass."

"Then go help her!" I screamed at him, tripping and falling backwards, barely registering that I was falling before I felt something warm and a hell of a lot softer than the concrete floor catch me.

"I told you, you were gonna fall on your ass," he sighed. "Why are you so pissy Ali?"

"I saw you flirtin' with that... _girl..."_ I stifled a sob that threatened to escape.

"Baby, what girl?" He asked. "I wasn't flirting with anyone."

"That blonde girl in the tiny skirt and the pink shirt with the boobs and she made you laugh and..." I buried my face into his shoulder and cried, twelve years of never being good enough finally catching up to me.

He chuckled and tightened his grip on me. "Ali Cat... that was Char. She's Peter's girl."

"Why were you flirting with her then?" I asked feeling a little hysterical.

"I wasn't flirting! She was telling me a story about Peter."

"I wanna go home," I sobbed miserably.

"Alright," he sighed standing up and carrying me out the door, the sounds of people making out and moaning now drowning out the sound of music.

"I'm sorry..." the tears kept rolling down my cheeks I was unable to stop them.

"For what?" he asked.

"For crying... For ruining your fun night..." I mumbled, my stomach turning.

He pressed his lips to my hair. "Well how can I have fun if you're not having fun Ali?"

"You seemed to be havin' fun," I mumbled bitterly.

He sighed, "I don't want to fight with you."

"Then..." my voice wobbled as I said my next words. "Break up with me then."

He stopped walking and looked at me. "Excuse me?"

"If you don't like me anymore just dump me Jazz, then you don't have to pretend anymore."

"What the fuck?" He shook his head and started walking faster. "I don't know what you drank tonight but you are cut off."

My mind was spinning and I felt this dull throb in my head right between my eyebrows. "I love you..." I whispered in a watery voice.

"I love you too, Alice."

"Do you?" I reached up and cupped his stubbly cheek.

He moved his head to kiss my palm and gave me a small smile. "Always have Ali Cat, always will."

"I'm sorry I got jealous..." I buried my hot face in his cool neck.

"Just promise me you won't start another table dance when you get jealous again. Unless its just for me," he teased.

"Did you get jealous?" I asked weakly. He nodded. "Why," I lifted my head so I could look at him through hazy eyes.

"Because out of all the shmucks in the world, for some reason you picked me. And to see them watching you... I know what they're thinking... feeling... hell, I'm thinking and feeling it too."

"And what's that?"

"That you look good up there, shaking and wiggling your hips and how good it is to have you doing that under me."

All the heat hit my crotch at once and I had the sudden urge to just hump him right here, in the middle of the street by the apartment building. "I need to fuck you Nerdy Boy..."

He smirked. "Hell yes you do, but we need to get you home and give you some water first."

I giggled and held on tighter as he ran up the stairs and unlocked the door. I was all excited and giddy and happy until Jasper sat me on the bed, then all that spinning and that pain between my eyebrows amplified and suddenly I felt like I was going to be sick.

I got up and ended up crawling towards the bathroom and barely made it to the toilet before everything I drank came bursting through my mouth. _Lovely._

~*~oOo~*~

I heard the chirping outside and sat up, expecting pain or something hang-overish related that I had always heard about... and other than the room being too damn bright... I had nothing. I thought back to last night and cringed, I couldn't believe how jealous I got, or how drunk... I didn't even get laid.

I looked next to me in bed and saw my Nerdy Boy sleeping peacefully and smiled. He had taken care of me last night when I was sick. After kissing his cheek I decided to be nice and make him breakfast, since he had been so sweet to me the night before.

I walked into the deserted kitchen and I got the eggs and bacon and set to work making his favorite breakfast sandwich. It was a little weird to me to have a sandwich for breakfast, but they were good so I wasn't about to diss them. After I was finished I put the two sandwiches on a plate and grabbed some orange juice before heading back into 'our' room.

It was technically his room, but everyone calls it our room, so whatever. I sat the plate on the desk and stradled my sleep man. _Oh hello morning wood._ I smirked and rubbed myself against him making him moan in his sleep. I leaned forward and kept rubbing, whispering his name into his ear.

"Ali..." he warned, clearly not sleeping anymore. "Keep that up and I'm gonna cum in my shorts."

"Mmm," I ran my nose along his scruffy jaw. "Can't have that can we?"

He shook his head in response. "Wanna fuck?" I asked.

He opened his eyes to look at me. "Are you feeling better?" he asked as his hands made their way up under my shirt.

"Yes," I nodded, "now I am just really, really horny."

"Well that makes two of us," he smiled before pulling me down to him so he could kiss my neck. I sighed happily as his hands slid up my back. He moved his hands down again as his lips moved along my jaw. "Shirt..." he whispered huskily as he tugged at the hem.

I pushed my hands up and let him take my shirt off for me, leaving me half naked and in his face. He reached up and groped my tits, squeezing them while biting his lip as he looked up at me. He looked so sexy like that. My eyes rolled into the back of my head and my hips bucked against his stomach as he sucked a tightened nub into his mouth, licking and swirling with his tongue and sending fire straight to my groin.

He moaned against my skin before looking up at me. "Top or bottom baby?"

"I don't care as long as you're inside me... soon." I half moaned out, feeling every bit the wanton whore I sounded like.

His hand reached around the nightstand blindly as he continued to tease me with his lips. He groaned before pulling away so he could find what he was looking for. He smiled triumphantly when he found the sliver package.

I pushed myself up slightly, letting him remove his boxers to put the condom on as I pulled my own shorts off and straddled his stomach again. He grabbed my waist and gave me a slight half smile as he pulled me down onto his cock. I closed my eyes as I let the blissful sensation of him filling and stretching me wash over me.

After that his hands gripped my hips and we began rocking against each other, desperate for the sweet relief. Soon the only sounds in the room were our heavy breathing and moans whenever one of us hit a particularly good spot.

He moved us, laying me on my back as he brought my legs up onto his shoulders, moving his hips faster. I loved the feeling, the places he was hitting, sending endorphins throughout my body. I was so close, I reached my hand between us and started to vigorously rub my engorged clit, sending tiny little bits of good feelings to my brain until I fell off the edge, moaning and crying with relief.

He started pounding harder into me, the muscles of his arms and jaw tensing as he pulled himself all the way out before thrusting himself deep into me. I gasped at the pain and pleasure mix as he moaned loudly into the air, his body tensing and releasing with the power of his orgasm.

He looked so sexy when he came. I ran my hand up his defined chest, up his neck and to his jaw, pulling his head down so I could kiss him.

He smiled against my lips. "Morning beautiful," he mumbled.

I let him pull away a little, "Morning! I made you breakfast!"

"You did?" he asked, moving to dispose of the condom.

"See?" I pointed towards the plate on the desk.

He put his glasses on and looked at where I was pointing. "Fried egg sandwiches?"

"With bacon!" I chirped.

He laughed and kissed me again. "Thank you Ali Cat."

"Thank you for taking care of my drunk ass last night..." I batted my eyelashes at him.

He laughed again. "Isn't that what I'm supposed to do? You've always taken care of me when I was sick."

"Yeah, but if I hadn't gotten jealous we wouldn't have even needed to do that."

He frowned slightly. "I still don't understand why you do."

"What, get jealous?" He nodded. "'Cause you're fucking sexy and smart, and I know that I'm not really all that great, and that you could do better, you know?"

He scoffed and rolled his eyes. "There's no way I could do better Ali, anyone else would be a downgrade." He shook his head, "why are we even talking about this?"

I smiled and kissed him, he always said the sweetest things. "Thank you baby."

"I love you Ali Cat..."

"I love you my Nerdy Boy." I smiled and twisted my hands into his hair, kissing him once more before letting him get up to eat.

* * *

End note: still liking it? Let us know!


	27. Chapter 27

**DISCLAIMER:**  
We are not nor have we ever claimed to be Stephanie Meyer. All Twilight Characters belong to her, she makes the money off of the movies/book/music/shirts ect. We own the plot bunnies that infect our brain and use them to raise money for charity. Therefore no money in our bank from these.

**K:** Look we have an update on time! YAY! So fair warning, NaNo is about to start and yep, once again Robs and I are in it. BUT we're still working on this as well, so we'll be updating. It just might be a few days late. Want to join the madness? Check out NaNoWriMo(dot)Org!

**Robs**: Hey lookie JPOV! and he might redeem himself... maybe... possibly... read on and enjoy ;)

Special thanks to miss Amber our fantastic beta, please continue to keep her in your thoughts :)

* * *

**JPOV**

Most of my things were taking residency in Emmett and Rosie's garage while my clothes stayed at Bella's apartment. Between work and spending time with Alice, I forgot about looking into either extending the current lease on the apartment or finding a new one. In fact, that was the farthest thing from my mind.

While things seemed to be going well between Alice and me, I could still see the hesitation and worry in her eyes. I knew she had every right to worry when I would leave again, but this time was different. I wasn't going to leave her.

"Did you ever think of maybe starting things over with her?"

I looked up from the paper to see my sister standing there with her eyebrow raised. "How do you mean?" I asked.

She sighed and shook her head. "You're just diving into this with Alice, Jazz. She's been through a lot because of you. You need to pace it."

I put my pen down and leaned back against the chair. "You mean take it slower?"

She nodded then shook her head again. "Yes and no, I mean," She sighed again and sat at the table. "Don't be like you were before. You kept secrets from everyone. You were like this creepy stalker guy with her and when you two did have a relationship it was all about the sex."

"It was not."

"Name one time you two hung out and didn't fuck in some way," she challenged.

"Emmett's eighteenth," I smirked. "We didn't do anything that night."

She rolled her eyes. "That's not what I meant and you know it."

"Yeah, yeah. I hear ya. Honestly, Rose, I was thinking of starting over with her."

"You mean no more random fucks against a wall?" Rose laughed as she headed back into the kitchen. I knew telling Emmett about that was a bad idea.

"Exactly. I'm gonna do what I should have done all those years ago. Actually be in a relationship with her."

"You weren't before?" Rose asked, the confusion clear in her voice.

"No, I mean we were... in the sense that she was the only one I was sleeping with. But I mean, I'm not gonna hide it this time. If Edward wants to break my nose over it, so be it," I shrugged.

"Oh come on Jasper! Do you really think he would have turned to violence all those years ago if you just told him how you felt about Alice?"

_Yes. _"I don't know," I lied.

"Seriously." I could imagine her rolling her eyes. "It was obvious that you two were together. Even when you tried like hell to pretend that nothing was going on, we all saw it. Edward actually saw it first, but gave _you_ the benefit of the doubt." She came back to the table and placed the plates down. "You hurt more than Alice by being stupid, you know."

"I know."

"No, I don't think you do Jasper," Rose said shaking her head as she set the table. "Alice was a wreck. It was like you took the best parts of her and left us nothing. Bella was confused about why you didn't trust us enough to tell us what was wrong. Emmett..." she sighed. "He was a different person Jazz... it was almost like with him, you took away his sense of humor." She looked up, her blue eyes locked with mine and they looked so heartbroken to have to hash this out again. "But Edward..." She shook her head. "I'm genuinely surprised that he had you come out here," she said honestly.

"You forgot one person," I pointed out.

She looked up at me and gave me a small smile. "Well, I kind of understood why you left. I would have to, given the situation."

"Don't hold back Rosalie."

"Alright, I thought you were a selfish, self-centered prick. How could you say you loved us then just leave without a good-bye? You didn't even tell us where you were going, didn't bother to tell us how to find you. You know you weren't the only one whose life was turned upside down. What Greg did... that affected me too, you know."

"I'm sorry Rose..."

She just shook her head and went back to the kitchen. I heard Emmett's motorcycle pull up and chuckled at the nineteen-fifties vibe these two had with their domestic life.

"You know," Rose called out just as Emmett stepped through the garage door. "Edward was on to your little game back when you two went to the concert."

"What? How?"

"Oh come on. Linkin Park tickets... in California. Yeah, that wasn't obvious at all."

**~*~*~February 22nd, 2002~*~*~**

Alice hadn't stopped bouncing since the moment we left home to come here. I knew she'd love the concert tickets and truth be told, I was just glad to get her something that we could both enjoy together.

Rose and Emmett gave me shit for the last week, saying that this qualified as a date, since I was taking her out of state, overnight. While I would have loved to agree with them, I tried my best to maintain a friendly distance.

The opening bands were loud and obnoxious, but did their job. They had the crowd hyped and ready for the main show. The minute the boys from Linkin Park crossed the stage the intensity in the air changed.

Half way through their set, Alice removed her hoodie and tied it around her waist as she bounced around and sang along. The minute I saw the little white top she was wearing, I knew I was in trouble. If I noticed her, I was fairly sure the other boys around us did as well.

Sure enough a few minutes later, some kid tried to pull her over with the intention to dance against her. I quickly wrapped my arms around her, placing my hands firmly against the skin of her stomach and pulled her closer. The kid gave me a quizzical look, to which I answered by kissing the crook of her neck.

She pushed herself closer to me and seemed to like the attention I was giving her, letting out a small approving sound. I kissed her once more, content on just holding her for the rest of the concert.

When it was over, we went to a nearby motel. I felt bad that I couldn't get something nicer, but I knew Alice wouldn't care. She stayed in the car while I checked in. Once I was done, I went back to the car, tossed the key over to Alice and grabbed our bags and her pillow.

She took the pillow from me, tucking it under her arm before taking my free hand in hers. Silently we walked up the back staircase to our room. I started chewing on my lip nervous about what she'd think when she saw only one bed in the room. It's not like we haven't slept in the same bed before... just not without the risk of someone barging in on us.

She sat on the bed, bouncing slightly as I placed her bag near her. "It's springy," she said smiling.

"I bet... so um check out is at noon and seeing how it's almost midnight, we should probably get to bed soon so we don't miss it."

She pulled her hoodie off, tossing it towards the chairs by the window. "This is part of my birthday gift, right?" she asked. I nodded in response. "Well then, don't you think there's a tradition we need to uphold?" she asked biting her lip while adverting her gaze.

I moved to sit next to her. "I don't know what you mean," I teased, slowly kicking my shoes off. I felt the bed shift and looked up as she moved to straddle my lap.

"I think you do, Nerdy Boy," she said as she wrapped her arms around my neck.

"Hmm... traditions huh? Well, I already said happy birthday..." I wrapped my arms around her, moving one of my hands along the exposed skin of her lower back. "And there was the customary party..."

She twisted her fingers in my hair at the base of my skull and pouted a little at me, "One more tradition, that's just ours?"

"Just ours?" I teased, knowing exactly what she meant. She nodded and bit her full bottom lip. I smiled as I placed my hand on her cheek and gently removed her lip with my thumb. "I can't kiss it if you're biting it," I joked.

Her breathing hitched as her eyes locked with mine, "Please?" she whispered. I obliged, moving my hand to cup the back of her neck as I softly kissed her.

The kiss started off gentle and slow, but quickly turned passionate and deep. The more our tongues and lips moved to together the more of her I wanted.

My hands slid up along her sides and under her top, my fingertips brushing against the side of her breasts, making her gasp. I took the opportunity to move my lips to her throat as my hand cupped her soft breast. She gasped again and wiggled a little, making me pull away just in time for her to pull the short white top over her head.

I watched the movement of her chest as her breathing picked up, before rubbing my thumb over one of her hardened nipples. "Oh God, Jasper..." she breathed, her hands making their way under my shirt, running along the taunt muscles above my jeans.

"Hold on," I said softly, kissing her once before yanking my shirt up over my head and tossing it to the side. I wrapped my arms around her again, holding her to me as I moved us so she was under me on the bed. "Better?" I asked.

"Yes," she was breathing hard. "Nerdy Boy... Are we?"

I shook my head. "Not yet," I said softly against the skin of her collarbones. She wiggled again and moved her hand lower, dipping her fingers into the side of my jeans.

"We're all alone," she whispered in a somewhat naughty voice.

I looked up at her as I kissed lower. "Uh huh..." I agreed.

"We can do stuff... If you want," she looked at me imploringly.

I smirked at her before moving to kiss her sternum and stomach. "Do you want to?" I asked.

"Yeah," she said so quietly I wasn't sure if I was supposed to hear it. "I want you..."

I moved back up, kissing her passionately again. I wanted her too. I was just an idiot and didn't think this was going to happen. She wrapped her legs around my waist and pressed herself harder against my chest, smashing her soft breasts against me.

My hands traveled to the waist of her jeans and I moved slightly to pop the button, pulling away to smirk down at her as I pulled the jeans down. _Christ on a crutch, she's wearing a thong._

She sat up, her hands going for my belt and shakily began removing it. I cupped her face in my hands. "Relax Ali Cat," I said softly before sucking her bottom lip into my mouth. I slowly took the lead in the kiss, using my own lips to part her mouth before touching my tongue with hers.

It was what she needed to calm down. The nervous trembling of her hands subsided, as a new found confidence took over and she managed to undo the belt and the fly of my jeans.

I laid her back onto the bed, never once breaking the kiss as she used her feet to push my jeans down. I kissed my way down her jaw and neck, nipping and sucking on her sweet, soft skin, making my way to her breasts as I kicked my jeans the rest of the way off.

I slowly ran my tongue around her nipple, watching her reaction, before sucking it into my mouth. She mewled as one hand fondled her other breast and my free hand made its way down the flat of her stomach.

Just as my finger tips made it under the waistband of her panties, she tugged my hair, making me move back up where she hungrily took my lips with hers.

It was my turn to moan as I touched her slick folds, teasing her as I ran the tip of my middle finger up slowly between them.

"God baby… you're so wet," I breathed as I kissed the skin beneath her ear, desperately trying to control the urge to just take her.

"You make me that way," she purred, her hand tracing my muscles lightly before dipping into my boxers.

I bit my lip as I felt her fingers brush against my cock. I slowly pumped my finger in and out of her as my thumb drew lazy circles against her clit.

"Oh God," she gasped, her hips bucking into my hand as she closed her eyes, her mouth forming a small 'o' shape.

I pumped a little faster, stopping at one point when I felt her hand wrap around me and pump in rhythm to my movements.

"Tighter baby," I practically begged, whimpering when her hand tightened around me.

Our hands pumped faster as each one of us made the other moan and pant harder. I wasn't sure about her, but having her stroke me like this was making it easier for me to imagine what it would be like to move inside her.

Just the thought alone made me lose it as I felt my hips jerk into her hand and my balls tighten as I came onto her hand.

I slowed the movement of my hand, watching her as she removed hers from my boxers to lick the cum of it.

_Holy fuck, that's hot!_

"Not as bad as I expected," she said with a blush.

"You're so fucking hot," I told her, kissing her hard as I pumped my finger into her faster. She gasped into the kiss but quickly returned it. Her hips began rocking into my hand, causing more friction on her clit as we moved faster.

She moved her head to the side as she started to pant my name, my lips running along her neck, feeling her heart race through her vein. The one hand she had on my shoulder, dug its nails into me and I knew she was on the edge.

I stopped playing with her clit, using my just my finger to please her, waiting for the right moment.

"Jasper… please…" she moaned arching her back, pushing herself against me. With a quick roll of her clit between my thumb and forefinger, I felt her cum around me.

"I want to taste you so bad," I admitted, licking the bit of sweat from her chest that had formed, as I slowly pumped inside of her, letting her ride out her orgasm. "Feel you cum and shudder around my tongue…"

She moaned louder at that, followed by quick, shallow pants. When I knew her climax was over, I removed my hand and brought it to my mouth where promptly sucked on my finger, moaning at the taste of her.

She stared wide eyed at me. "Did you like that?" she asked in a breath.

I nodded. "Oh yeah," I said, moving to grab the blanket and pulling it over us. "Was that what you had in mind?" I asked her.

She smiled a little, her cheeks flushing as she looked at me. "Yeah, it was nice."

I chuckled wrapping my arms around her. "Just nice huh?" I teased.

She smiled a little bigger, "No it was more than nice... this was the most amazing day of my life... Thank you N.B."

"You're very welcome Ali Cat. Thank you for letting me spend it with you," I smiled before kissing the tip of her nose.

"There's no one who I would want to spend it more."

"Not even you're be-eff-eff, Rosie?" I teased.

She shook her head with a grin.

"Well good. She probably would have bitched the whole time anyway," I laughed. "We should get some sleep. Long day on the road tomorrow." _Back to reality_, I added silently.

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_**End note: reviews are better than Nerdy Boy finally pulling his head out ;)**_


	28. Chapter 28

**Disclaimer: We don't own anything that is Twilight related that earns an income. We just own this plot and Payton Swan and Ryan Cullen :P**

**K: *blows off dust* Surprise!**

**Robs: Whoa, long time no see... Bet y'all missed Alice so we'll just let you get to it ;) **

**As always thank you for your patience and for reading, and to our amazing beta Amber :)

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**APOV**

Something was going on and I knew it. Jasper had been avoiding being alone with me, and that, in and of itself, was odd. Jasper used to love being alone with me, not liking public displays of affection or people snooping in his private life.

_Maybe that's why he never really let me in, because of how private he was._ I shook my head at the thought, he told me just about everything else.

Maybe he was just trying to avoid having sex with me. That thought brought on a whole new set of worries.

_Seriously Alice, stop freaking out about it._ I scolded myself as I carefully placed the paperwork that was on my desk at work into it's separate compartments. I was distracting myself from checking my cell every five minutes to see if Jasper had texted or called me.

Towards the end of my work day I noticed the light on my phone flashing and held my breath as I checked it. It was him. I smiled as I read what the text said, 'dinner?'. I responded with a simple 'yes' before packing up my purse and packing up my office for the night.

I arrived home with just enough time to change into a simple, breezy eyelet dress and some wedges, I knew Jasper didn't really care for high fashion and he tended to like it best when I dressed casual... Or in nothing but the highest heels I could find, but that was another subject altogether. I was brushing my hair when I heard him call out from the living room.

"Ali? You here?"

I walked out of my bedroom and smiled at him, "Course I am. What do you think?" I asked as I spun around in my dress.

"Very nice," he smiled at me. "Might want to take a light jacket though... don't want you to get sick."

"Where you takin' me? It's summertime, Nerdy Boy." I teased, grabbing a cardigan anyway.

"Some where near the ocean..."

I put the cardigan over my forearm, grabbed my purse and smiled at him. "Okay, I'm ready."

About twenty minutes later we were standing at the pier in front of a big yacht. Twinkle lights ran the length and a table sat in the center of the deck, roses decorating the boat in clusters.

"Wow," Was all I could manage to say. It was quite possibly the most beautiful date I'd ever been on and we hadn't even sat down yet. "This is pretty incredible."

He led me to the table, pulling the chair out for me. "Yeah? I'm just hoping you don't get sea sick," he laughed nervously.

"I never have before," I smoothed the back of my skirt as I took my seat.

"Good," he smiled before kissing my cheek and moving to his chair.

"We're alone," I mused, quirking an eyebrow up at him and grabbing the menu that was resting on my place setting.

He nodded. "I figured this was better than a crowded restaurant."

"Is this a date?" I asked point blank, trying to see what he was up to.

"Yeah..."

I chuckled, "I wasn't expecting that, you've been kinda pullin' away lately."

He gave me a small smile. "I've been thinking and giving you space so it didn't seem like I was... jumping the gun?"

I could understand that, after all Garrett and I had just broken up, "What'cha been thinkin' about?" I asked.

"You, honestly," he answered as he reached for his water. "Well... us."

The waiter interrupted our conversation for a moment to take our orders and dutifully walked back to wherever he had came from after he finished writing it down.

"What about us?" I asked once the waiter was out of sight.

"You know, our past... the future..." he looked at me as if he was studying me.

"And?" I asked, wondering why he wasn't fully answering the question. Partial truths bug the hell out of me, especially with him.

"And I was thinking maybe we could try again. When you're ready of course."

"Took you long enough," I teased as the waiter came back to set our drink orders on the table. Just before he left again, he paused to inquire whether I was chilly or not. I looked over and noticed that Jasper looked tense, like he was doing his best not to say something. "What is it, N.B.?"

"Nothing," he said shaking his head and giving me a tight smile. He was obviously jealous.

"You're jealous," I accused with a smile.

"So what if I am?" he laughed.

"You've always been the jealous type," I winked at him and laughed along with him.

***~*~* October 30th, 2004 *~*~***

I was excited, I was going to a Halloween party with Jasper, and we were going as a couple, with themed costumes and everything. I was going as a sexy southern belle, ala kinky lingerie model and he was going as a civil war soldier. He walked into his room wearing his costume as I was putting on my thigh highs and all I could think was _damn, I just love a man in uniform_.

I buckled the strap of my heels around my ankle as he turned to face me, the gray of his suit jacket made his steel eyes even more gray than usual. "You look hot," I said with a smile.

He smiled and mumbled out a thanks as he looked at my legs. "You like?" I asked, standing up and twirling so he could see the ruffles on my hot-pants.

"Yeah..." he nodded, adjusting the collar of his costume. I pulled on my elbow length satin gloves and grabbed the little lace umbrella, tossing it on my shoulder before I grabbed Jasper's hand and pulled him out of the apartment.

The party was fun, Jasper seemed a bit reserved as he usually did at these sorts of functions. I had gotten to know some of the people that frequented these frat parties so in between dancing with Jasper and drinking with him, I would socialize, trying to get him to engage with some of his peers as well. We continued this little routine until I began talking to another blond guy that Jasper went to college with. He was friendly, but he kept making really lewd comments about my costume. I just rolled my eyes but it made Jasper mad. Really mad.

Jasper dragged me out of the party like a crazed man and wouldn't talk to me even when I begged him to tell me what was wrong. I tried to ask him what was up when we arrived at the apartment but all he did was kiss me. It was a passionate, needy kiss. A kiss that went straight through me. A kiss that told me I was his.

I pulled away and smiled when he smirked at me. His glasses were slightly askew and it was a really cute look on him, but he didn't give me an explanation or anything. He simply pulled me into his room and continued kissing me, picking me up and moving his hands to grope and squeeze my ass as I wrapped my legs around his waist.

I could feel us moving, but we didn't stop kissing, our tongues dueling and gasping for air when we briefly broke apart before returning to our wet and reckless kissing. I felt something solid hit my ass and heard a crash that forced my eyes to snap open and me to pull away slightly. That gave him an opening to pull off my shorts and panties, yanking them down my legs as I looked for the source of the noise from my perch on his desk.

"Wha-" I was cut off by Jasper's demanding lips. Figuring that I should just enjoy this and stop worrying so much I gave in to him, letting him move his lips to my neck where he bit and sucked and kissed fervently as he fumbled with his pants. I tangled my hands into his blond curls and let myself enjoy the pleasure that coursed through my body as he nipped along my collarbone, gasping loud when I felt him penetrate me with one quick push.

His hands gripped my hips as he pounded into me, panting and groaning into my neck as I moaned. My toes were curling from pleasure, it felt so good to have him take me like this. It was raw and hungry and powerful, things that Jasper usually wasn't with me. My hands moved down from his hair, along his neck and to the front of his jacket, unbuttoning and pushing it from his shoulder as he slowed himself down to let me undress him.

Once his coat and shirt were removed, he forcefully brought his lips back to mine, his hips resuming their hurried movements as I felt his fingertips glide along the swell of my breasts before pushing one out of it's corseted confines and taking it between his lips. My head lulled back and I uttered incoherencies as my orgasm rushed through my body, making me forget where I was or that I was using my hand to keep me up.

He continued to pound into me as I recovered from my orgasm. His breath was coming in quick pants and his hands were digging into the flesh about my thighs, I could tell he was close, but something was holding him back.

"Tell me you're mine," he panted as he moved, his grey eyes locking on to mine.

It dawned on me just as the words spilled out of my mouth, "I'm yours forever." His eyes fluttered shut as his grip on me loosened, that little smile alerted me to the fact that he was giving in to his orgasm. His jealousy was holding him back, his jealousy caused him to take me like some savage and this was all because he needed to possess me and know that I was still his. His leaned forward and rested his forehead against my chest, breathing hard as I ran my fingers through his tangled hair.

"Were you jealous just now?" I asked almost hesitantly. He nodded slightly in response and I let out a small laugh. "About what?"

"James," he mumbled slowly looking up at me. "He said some things and I just lost it... Are you okay?"

I nodded and smiled a little. "Yeah, I'm okay. You okay?"

He gave me a small smile, "Yeah... a bit ashamed of myself but I'll survive." He backed away, fastening his pants as he looked at the floor and chuckled. "However, I don't think my laptop will..."

I followed his gaze and gasped when I saw the broken laptop, bits of electronics strewn about. "I'm sorry N.B.!"

He laughed and shook his head. "Considering how it died... I think it would have happily sacrificed itself," He smirked at me slightly before holding his hand out. "Com'on lets get you down from there."

"Thanks," I smiled as he helped me down. "Now all I need is some sweatpants or something and I'll be set."

"You sure you don't want to stay naked?" he teased as he pulled a dresser drawer open.

~*~oOo~*~

I shook my head and laughed as I looked at the much older looking Jasper sitting across from me, no longer wearing glasses, no longer scrawny. "Where'd you go?" he asked.

"Just remembering that time you broke your laptop," I mused.

He laughed and shook his head. "What the hell spurred that memory?" he asked genuinely curious.

"The fact you got jealous over nothing," I teased.

"Hey now, back then I was just a stupid teenage boy," he defended lightly.

"And you just got jealous when that waiter was asking me if everything was to my satisfaction, why?"

"Cause I'm a stupid man?" he laughed. He knew he was busted. I smiled gently at him and shook my head.

"Admit it, you just don't like other men lookin at me."

"No, that's Edward's problem. I just don't like what their thinking and feeling towards you."

I laughed at his comment about Edward. "You can read minds now?"

He shook his head. "No. But I know what I think when I look at you."

"And what is that?" I tilted my head to study him.

"That you're beautiful. And then my mind wanders to other thoughts," he said the last part with a smirk.

I laughed, "Oh really?"

He nodded, laughing as he leaned closer. "See odds are, that Mr. 'are you completely satisfied' over there was thinking of either how your lips would feel around his cock, or if you like rough sex. I have the advantage because I know," he winked at me before leaning back in his chair and picking up his glass. "And I also know that Alice Cullen doesn't do those kinds of things on the first date."

His words had made the pit of my stomach all tingly. "Oh, you know that do you?" He nodded as an amused expression crossed his lips. "Is this our first date?"

"One would think, but I believe that is entirely up to you Ali Cat."

I raised an eyebrow at him and smirked. "I think we had our first date a few years back."

He chuckled. "I guess you're right."

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